Author's Note: I didn't realize that I never posted this one over here so! Fixing that!
This was the idea I had. There was another more porn-y one but it didn't feel right for Shauna and Brian's relationship so I didn't go with it. Still, this is kind of nice. (I hope anyway.) Anyway, it's mostly talking.
"She asked about you a lot. My mom loved you, Brian."
It was weird hearing this from Shauna. Brian remembered how from the very first meeting, Shauna's mom had welcomed Brian into her home as one of her own. It was just her and Shauna and Shauna's sister growing up. So for them to envelope Brian into their little family from the get-go had been a little shocking and a lot amazing. Margerie had laughed at Brian's jokes, full-bellied and face full of tiny, happy crinkles. And she'd pat Brian's cheek after every hug, commenting in some way on his scruff. She was always genuinely pleased to see him around with Shauna.
He didn't think it was a big deal at the time. He was just The Boyfriend. Maybe he was The Boyfriend That We Like in a line of The Boyfriend We Wish Wasn't's but he hadn't seen it as any special thing at the time. Except for the way it made him feel, accepted and wanted. Family had a way of making you feel accepted but not wanted, or wanted but not accepted. Like they all were looking at you, judging and wishing you were something more than you were.
"She just didn't understand, I think," Shauna was saying, looking down, unable to meet his eyes. "I'm pretty sure she hated me for a while."
"No," Brian quickly soothed, reaching for Shauna's hand. "Shauna, she could never hate you. Especially not for something dumb like that. You're her daughter. I was just The Boyfriend."
Shauna laughed a little and turned her hand in Brian's so their fingertips were resting in each other's palms.
"You didn't see her face when I told her. We had a big fight about it about a week later when it became obvious it was for good," Shauna whispered, drumming her fingers lightly in Brian's palm. "She didn't talk to me for a month. And D, well, D took her side. But I think she was more upset that her musician buddy was gone."
Brian couldn't keep the frown off his face. He had never thought Shauna's family had liked him that much.
"They didn't get it, though. Last time, when I said something changed in you and you shut down, it was more than that. At one point, Brian, you checked out. You weren't just down, or in a slump. Mentally, you had just...disappeared. That was when I gave up. I could deal with everything up to then, I was trying to help and you seemed like you might pull out of it. But then, it was like the lights went off. That was when I knew you weren't coming back."
There was a pregnant silence between them, where Brian tried to absorb that. He remembers how down he had felt, how hard it had been at the time to try and juggle his music, Shauna, himself, and paying rent, how the longer he felt down the less interest he had in things he cared about. It was like he was becoming numb to the world around him. He hadn't thought it was anything but stress.
"I'm sorry," Shauna said with that little head tilt and smile she did when she felt like she was saying too much. "I didn't mean to bring the mood down."
"No, no, you didn't," Brian said, and covered her hand with his other one in case she tried to take it away. "It's just kind of bizarre for me. I knew I was doing bad but it never seemed like it was that bad, you know. And I never really thought your mom was that… happy about us. Being together. I mean, I knew she liked me, don't get me wrong. I just— I don't know. I guess I just didn't realize how many people were affected by our breakup."
"You seem like you're back to being you though, so," Shauna said, curling her fingers around one of his thumbs.
"I don't know. I tried getting help after I started getting over you leaving. I saw a therapist for a bit but it didn't seem to help. So I just tried to focus on music, making it and investing real time and effort into the band. It seemed to work for a while. But lately… Well, before I got the FBI gig, things just seemed like they weren't happening like they should. My brother and sister were leaving me behind and my dad, well, he didn't exactly look happy about my situation."
"And now," Shauna asked, shuffling forward just a few inches.
"I dunno," Brian sighed, bringing her smaller hand up and kissing the backs of a few fingers. "It's good for me and I'm doing great there. But my dad just seems more disappointed in me. He thinks I'm in over my head. And I can't exactly set him straight because what I do for the FBI is confidential, matter-of-national-security level stuff."
"Oh, Brian," Shauna whispered and leaned over, her lips finding his for a brief press. "I think this is good for you. You're excitable and talkative, creative. I'm seeing the Brian I loved those years ago. The one who was happy and made others happy. I think you should stick with it, and your dad will understand. He's probably just worried. The FBI can be dangerous stuff."
"I'm just a consultant."
"Still."
Brian sighed and met Shauna's eyes for the first time since they started this heavy conversational thread. For a second he felt like he could fall into them, fall into all the potential between them, fall back into what they had.
Shauna shuffled closer again and dropped her forehead to his collar, stifling a yawn into his chest. He chuckled quietly.
"I'm so tired but I don't want to stop talking," Shauna admitted, breath puffing warmly through the fabric of his white tee.
Brian wiggled, sliding down and stretching along the couch's matching ottoman, pushed up against it. Shauna shifted to accommodate it, draping the blanket from her lap over her body. Before they were completely settled, Shauna leaned over Brian's face and brushed her lips over his. He parted his lips, letting her claim them and set the pace. It was her that coaxed his lips to open wider, that slipped her tongue into his mouth to caress his own.
They kissed for several long minutes, chasing the warm contact and comfort whenever one of them pulled back. Eventually, Brian had to turn his face away and yawn into his shoulder. Shauna laughed into his neck and Brian couldn't stop the almost delirious giggle that bubbled in his chest.
"I have to work in the morning," he mumbled and Shauna laughed again.
"It is morning," she said, laying her head down on his chest and squirming to get comfortable.
"I have to work later this morning," he corrected with a huff. His eyes suddenly felt very droopy. He glanced at Shuana to see she had already let her eyes close, breaths turning into soft puffs.
"I'm so glad I don't," she murmured.
"Lucky," Brian slurred.
Sleep claimed him, dragging him deep as his chest rose and fell under Shauna's comforting weight.
AN: So there it is. Just some simple friendship.
