What if…

Disclaimer: ABC Family is credited with the basic storyline and the wonderful characters, things you haven't seen on the show, that's all me!

Summary: Something stopped Callie that night and she never left the Foster home. Can she assimilate into their family lifestyle or will it all be too much for her.

Notes: This was actually not anything that I had planned to write. I had a couple of reviewers who requested a "what if…" story and well, I liked the idea so here it is. I hope it lives up to everyone's expectations.

IMPORTANT: I'm using my own storyline of how the Liam saga played out in my other story Truth, it's not that I didn't like how the show handled it, I just kind of like how everything was finalized in my version and it's where my mind is when I'm writing so it would be too difficult to turn my mind off.

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Stef awoke the night after her wedding suddenly. She was nestled within Lena's arms and content and yet something was wrong. She felt something in her chest begging her to get up and check on her children. Carefully she untangled herself from her wife and slipped out of bed. She threw on a robe and went to check on Brandon first. His door was slightly ajar and she could see him sleeping peacefully. Walking quietly across the hall she peered into the boy's room, both were in their beds sleeping, Jesus snoring softly. Feeling as though she got up for nothing she moved to check the girl's room. She noticed Mariana sleeping in a rather unflattering position and then turned to see if Callie was alright. Her heart sunk when she noticed an empty, made, bed.

Quickly she flew down the stairs, hoping that Callie was in the kitchen getting a drink or couldn't sleep or something. Her mind was racing in panic, she was trying to think of some reason that Callie would be out of her bed at, she glanced at her watch, 3:47 in the morning.

She was in such a frenzy she almost tripped on a bag that was left at the bottom of the stairs. Studying the bag a little more closely, she recognized it to be the one that Callie had brought with her when she came to live with them. The blue duffle was one of two bags the girl had that contained all her worldly possessions.

Stef's heart began to race, why was Callie's bag at the bottom of the stairs? And more importantly, where was Callie?

Frantically running into the kitchen she was met with silence, she turned to enter the living room and stopped short at the sight of Callie sitting on one of the couches completely still. At first glance she looked like she might have been sleeping but as Stef got closer she could see Callie's body rocking ever so slightly and her eyes wide and filled with sorrow.

"Sweets, what are you doing down here?" she said, approaching carefully. Callie looked like a frightened rabbit and Stef didn't want her to bolt.

Callie didn't respond, she was lost in her own thoughts. She had gotten up an hour ago, packed her bags, silently said goodbye to everyone as they slept, and prepared to leave the Foster home forever. She had gotten to the bottom of the stairs and found that she couldn't take another step. She had dropped her bags and shakily made her way to the couch, panicked because of her body's lack of response to her wishes.

She couldn't rationalize it. She had prepared herself to leave. And yet, she couldn't take one step outside of the door. She couldn't leave the only place she had felt safe in the past six years. And so she sat on the couch without moving, unable to get her body to respond the way she willed it to.

"Callie," Stef tried once more, worried by her lack of response. She reached out and grabbed Callie's arm loosely, planning on turning her towards Stef so that she could look at her face while she was talking to her.

Her reaction was instantaneous. Callie went from prone and emotionless to startled and afraid. Her eyes were wide with fear as she searched for something; eventually falling on Stef's concerned face which led to her immediately relaxing.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I was supposed to be gone," she whispered, trying to make Stef understand what she was thinking, what she was planning on doing.

"What are you saying Callie? Were you… were you going to run away?" Stef asked, astonished. She thought that Callie had been happy here, she had agreed to become a part of their family only yesterday, and now she was talking about being gone?

"I ruin everything," she whispered, willing Stef to just agree and let her go, help her go.

"Oh no love, you don't ruin everything. Why would you say that?" Stef asked, her heart breaking for Callie. She could hear how much Callie believed what she was saying was true.

Callie just looked at her, unable to find the words to answer. Stef could see this and instead of pushing for answers tonight, she just carefully pulled Callie into her arms.

"It's okay now Callie, I've got you," she whispered, rubbing Callie's back and trying to reassure the fragile girl. They stayed like that until Callie finally reacted and reached her arms up to grasp Stef as tightly as she had been holding her.

"I'm sorry," She said repeatedly, like a mantra.

"It's going to be okay Callie, we are going to get through this, whatever this is," Stef said, pulling her back at arm's length so that she could focus on determining Callie's mental state.

"Okay," Callie said, nodding her head and bringing one hand up to wipe her tears away.

"Are you alright to go back to bed?" Stef asked, she would have preferred to bring Callie back to her and Lena's bed but Lena wasn't exactly dressed for visitors and she didn't want to leave Callie alone for one minute. She hoped that Callie would be in a better state of mind after she slept and that they would be able to discuss this rationally but at the moment she was a flight risk and therefore was not to be left alone.

"Uh…" Callie trailed off, not wanting to be alone with her thoughts in her bed at the moment. She had convinced herself that she wasn't going back to that bed and she wasn't sure if she would be able to sleep there tonight.

"That's okay Sweets; we can sleep down here tonight. Put on a movie and just relax together," Stef reasoned.

Callie nodded to show that she was agreeable with that option. Together they rose and moved to the den. There Callie sat on the couch and Stef threw on the Lion King, it had always worked when she needed to put the twins or Brandon to sleep after a nightmare and she hoped it would work for Callie too.

Making her way back to the couch she settled herself down at one end with a blanket. She could see how uncomfortable Callie seemed and she patted the spot next to her as an invitation. Callie looked reluctant at first but then gave in to temptation and scooted over to where Stef was and nestled into her side, bringing her own blanket up and snuggling into Stef as the movie played.

Both were asleep before the end of the opening song.

Lena woke when the sun started streaming through the window. She reached, instinctively, for Stef and was surprised to find her side of the bed empty. Groping her wife's pillow Lena was concerned when it was stone cold, which meant Stef had left their bed a while ago.

Lena rose and stretched before throwing on some sleeping clothes. She went in search of her wife. As she descended the stairs she immediately became concerned when she saw Callie's blue duffle bag and backpack at the bottom. Was Callie leaving them? She suddenly wished she had checked on all the kids before coming down the stairs but decided to check the first floor first. Walking into the family room she smiled at the sight that greeted her: Stef and Callie were wrapped around each other on the couch and the DVD menu for the Lion King was playing over and over again.

Lena bit her bottom lip as she contemplated whether or not to wake them up. She knew, if they had been watching the Lion King to fall asleep, that something bad had happened because that was the Foster family's go-to "feel good" movie.

She decided to start the coffee and let the aroma wake the two up, knowing how they were both coffee addicts.

As she busied herself around the kitchen she couldn't help the smile on her face. Yesterday had been such a perfect day in her opinion. Not only had she married the woman of her dreams, they had also made the decision to adopt two children who deserved a home more than anyone. She finally felt as though their family was complete.

Just as she had predicted, the smell of fresh coffee had woken Stef and she came walking into the kitchen, re-wrapping her robe which had gotten messed up during her sleep on the couch.

"Morning love," she said, kissing Lena before making her way over to the coffee mugs.

"Good morning," Lena replied. "Though, I guess I should be asking how good of a morning it is because I saw the Lion King DVD has been used."

"As long as all of our children are in the house this morning, I'll consider it a win," Stef replied, leaning back against the counter and enjoying the feel of caffeine entering her system.

"And what is that supposed to mean?" Lena asked, automatically concerned at the tone of Stef's voice.

"Callie… she was going to leave last night. And by leave I mean she packed her bags and was going to disappear into the night," Stef said, sounding exhausted as she got through what happened the night before.

"Did she say why?" Lena asked, distressed at how scary it would have been to wake up in the morning to find Callie gone. She couldn't even begin to imagine what that would have done to Jude; he would have been completely devastated.

"She kept saying how sorry she was and how she ruins everything. I don't know where it came from though. She seemed so happy yesterday. Could it have all been a front?" Stef wondered both to herself and out loud.

"I guess there is a lot about Callie we still don't know. She carries burdens that you and I can't even imagine. I'm just so thankful that you were able to stop her. We can worry about the why later, at least she is safe with us still and not god knows where on the street."

"I didn't exactly stop her. When I came down the stairs her bag was there and she was in some kind of panicked state on the couch. I think she wanted to leave but couldn't muster up enough of anything to actually do so," Stef said, even more concerned about Callie's mental state when she really thought about the events of last night.

"I think we should wake her and talk to her before everyone gets up," Lena said, wanting to get this out of the way early. She wouldn't be able to get through the day if she had to wonder about whether Callie was going to bolt at any time.

"No need, I'm up," Callie said softly from the entryway of the kitchen. She had woken when Stef had gotten up but she wasn't sure she was ready to face the two women just yet. She had tried to run away last night; even if they wanted to adopt her yesterday there was no way they would still want to today. She just wanted to relish in the feeling of their home for a little longer before they called Bill. She also hoped that she would be able to convince them to keep Jude when they sent her away, none of this was his fault and she had promised him she wouldn't be selfish anymore and she screwed everything up again. Jude was so right, she was selfish, she couldn't even run away right.

"Callie, sweetie, come and sit with us please," Stef said, moving out a bar stool for her to sit on. Lena came up on the other side of her so that she was sandwiched between the two.

"So… Stef tells me that you wanted to leave last night? Was it something we did yesterday?" Lena asked, getting right down to the nitty-gritty.

"No, you guys are great," Callie said quickly. She didn't want them to think any of this was their fault; she just didn't deserve a home.

"Then why Callie, you have to help us understand why. Why would you try to run away in the middle of the night?" Stef asked.

"You were going to have to send me away anyway," Callie said. "I just … um, well I hoped that you would… you know, keep Jude. And I thought… if I wasn't in the picture… that you might do it. He's a good kid!"

"Of course he is. And so are you. Why do you think we would send you away?" Stef asked, laying a hand on Callie's shoulder to comfort her.

"I…uh…I've got problems, you know… like the reason you send me to a shrink…" Callie said, staling and trying to get something out. She had been all ready to tell them about what had happened between her and Brandon at the wedding but Jude's words kept echoing in her head: We're a package deal, they are not going to separate us.

"Callie, you do not have problems. You have had a rough life and sometimes it's a little more than you can handle on your own. We are here to support you but Dr. Kimura knows how to help you in ways that we don't. She said that you have been making progress, did something happen last session?" Lena asked. She made sure to keep in touch with Callie's personal therapist, last time she had spoken to her she had been informed that Callie was becoming more comfortable opening up and that she was beginning to truly come to terms with what happened to her. What had changed?

"No…" Callie said pathetically. She didn't know what to say, therapy was going fine she guessed, she just panicked and needed to say something.

"If you want we can get you a different therapist," Stef offered.

"No, she's fine," Callie said, her voice kind of dead. She felt completely drained already, even though it was barely 7am.

"Callie…" Lena began, taking her hands and turning so that they were facing each other, "Callie, do you not want us to adopt you?" It was the question that had been burning to come out as soon as Stef had told her that Callie had planned to run away.

"It's not that. You guys are great…better than I deserve," she answered.

"Callie, you are an amazing young woman, and you deserve the best family and life possible. You know this right?" Stef asked, amazed by the self-loathing that she was getting from Callie. She dealt with this too often in her line of work, victims didn't believe that they deserved anything good in their life because there was something that had done in the past that made them think they were unworthy of love.

Callie didn't answer because she couldn't She didn't deserve the best in life, she was selfish and she had gone and kissed Brandon even though she knew that it would get her and Jude removed from the house.

"Okay, this is something we are going to talk about with Dr. Kimura. But for now, Callie, we need you to promise us that you won't try to run away again. Promise that, if you feel overwhelmed and like you need to get out of here, that you will come and find one of us first and talk to us. Don't bottle things up until you feel like the only option is to run away," Lena said, she waited until Callie nodded before leaning in and kissing her forehead.

"Alright, we're tabling this discussion for now and instead let's talk breakfast," Stef said, wanting to change the mood of the kitchen before the rest of the family woke up.

"Callie? As a soon to be new member of this family, what would you like?" Lena asked, letting Callie know subtly that they still wanted to adopt her, baggage and all.

"French toast?" She asked.

"Sure thing, grab the bread out of the bread draw please," Stef said, moving to the refrigerator to get the rest of the ingredients. Together the three of them began to work in tandem to get breakfast on the table.

When Jude woke up that morning he felt terrible for two reasons: first was that he felt hot and his stomach hurt, the second reason was because he remembered how he spoke to his sister the day before. He had said such terrible things to her, things that weren't even true. She had put him first ever since their mom died and he threw that all back in her face.

Turning onto his side he let out a low groan. His stomach felt like it was gurgling.

Jesus woke up to that sound. Looking around for the source his eyes eventually felt on Jude's curled up figure.

"Hey Buddy, you alright?" he asked, getting out of bed and making his way over to where Jude was lying in the fetal position.

"I don't feel so good," he mumbled back, his voice sounding strange in his ears.

Jesus could see that Jude was turning a little green and he had just enough time to grab the garbage pail near his desk for Jude to throw up in. The mess of cake and punch was not a pretty sight but Jesus made sure to hold the basket and rub Jude's back as he threw it all up. As soon as he seemed like he was finished, Jesus helped him lay back down on the bed.

"I'm going to get our moms," he said, trying to reassure Jude that someone would be there soon to take care of him.

"NO…I want Callie," Jude moaned miserably. Callie had always taken care of him; she was the one that he wanted right now.

"Alright, I'll get Callie then, just hold on and if you feel like you are going to be sick again, the basket is right next to your bed okay?" Jesus asked, he waited until Jude nodded before rushing out of his room and to the girl's room.

He knocked once as a warning before opening the door. He could see Mariana sitting up in bed looking dazed and sleepy; clearly he had just woken her up. When he looked at Callie's bed it was made and her bags, which were always right next to her bed, were missing.

"Mariana, where is Callie?" Jesus asked, slightly panicked by the lack of Callie's belongings in the room.

"Huh? I don't know, maybe downstairs?" Mariana replied, still not awake enough to process what was going on. She turned back over in her bed and pulled the covers over her head, she wasn't in the mood to deal with Jesus' shenanigans this early in the morning.

Jesus tried to calm his growing panic. Ever since the whole Liam debacle he felt extremely protective of both Mariana and Callie. He had nightmares of Liam coming back and getting Callie but this time he wasn't able to save her. To see her bed empty and her stuff gone made him feel like his nightmare was becoming a reality.

He quickly made his way downstairs, skipped steps and jumping the last four entirely. He was so worked up he missed the fact that Callie's bags were still huddled by the door, had he seen those he might have lost it.

"Callie?" He said, louder than necessary, trying to keep the panic out of his voice.

"We're in here Jesus," he heard his mama say from the kitchen. He raced into there, immediately feeling the tension leave his body when he saw Callie at the butcher block, chopping fresh strawberries while his moms made French toast.

Callie looked up at him expectedly and he almost forgot why he came down there in the first place. "Hmmm?" she prompted him.

"Oh, Jude needs you…" as soon as those three words left his mouth whole demeanor changed and she went from being wary and somewhat sad to being very focused. "…he's sick."

Callie went into mom mode immediately. She dropped the knife and abandoned her cutting. She moved swiftly to the fridge and pulled out a bottle of water and a bottle of Gatorade and then she was out of the kitchen and up the stairs before anyone else could get a word in to stop her.

"Why are Callie's bags in front of the door?" Jesus said, noticing for the first time and causing the moms to stop what they were doing and freeze, unsure of how to answer their son's question.

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Alright, so that's the first chapter of What if…

I see this story being somewhat of a fun and free story because there is literally no limit to what I can do with it. There is no precedent set from the show so I can completely make up my own storylines here.

One thing I will say is that this story will focus on Callie letting go of that "mom" role that she has had the past six years. Both she and Jude are going to have a hard time learning to lean on the moms instead of each other. Also I will attempt to tackle the Brandon/Callie issue eventually, which is going to be difficult because I am still, constantly, looking for something concrete to show that their relationship would be illegal and if there would be a way around it. I have an idea of how I am going to do it but we shall see. I am also going to be putting in some research time on Californian adoptions so see how that would all work. So if anyone has any research to share, leave it in a review or PM it to me please!

More to come!