Title: Weird story of Riku
Title chapter: Weird things happen a lot
Warning: Cursing, bad language, shounen-ai, drunk, ooc, character death and lots more... heheh...
Summary: I have NO clue heheh sorry I don't know where this story came from but I wanted it on the net anyway I hopeyou can laugh for some parts...
Disclaimer: Don't own Kingdom Hearts and never will bad enough I love Riku
A/N: Me: Oh as for the story I love Kingdom Hearts and it's not to say I don't like it but it just popped up outta nowhere ACK MY MUSES!
Kurayami: Nope I was the one who made this and I will decide what will happen
Me: ((glances at Kurayami)) you made this up?
Kurayami: Yup... Sharp stuff and blood? heheh
Me: KILLING YOU! ((Attacks Kurayami))
Kurayami: ACK! ((Runs away)) Oh anyway we made this round two o clock so sorry if it was crappy heheh we needed sleep I quess... ACK! ((runs away further))
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Late in the evening at Riku's house.
Darkside: ((Scary devilslaugh)) MWUAHAHAHAH! Nobody can beat the Darkside with his! Britney Spears! Oops I did it again I played with your heart got lost at the game! ((makes a stupid dance))
Riku: ((Glares at it till it's whimpers soft and crawls away.)) Good can I continue seeying Opera? There having it about me about being possesed and all that shit. ((mutters silent and looks at the tv screen.))
Tv: And our guest of today is!----' ((hearing a bleep tv screen falls out together with everything in the house.))
Riku: ((Blinks at it and finally embrace it sobbing.)) Don't leave me Opera! don't leave me sweet sweet tv!
Tidus: ((Laughs evil))
Riku: Damn you Tidus! ((Grabs his blade and runs outside chasing Tidus.))
Tidus: Whahahaha, you'll never-- ((falls into a large hole.))
Riku: ((Glances down and shrugs.)) Atleast i'm rid of him. ((Suddenly remembers his tv show and starts sobbing again.)) It would've been my great debuut! ((Stands up and rans to Kairi looking at her.))
Kairi: Hi.. Uh... Smiku. ((looks desperatly at her script.))
Kurayami: Hahahah! Smiku! HAHAHAHA!
Me: It's Riku! Idiot read Riku!
Kairi: ((look's up and growls.)) You go to bed it's ten o' clock and you need to go to school tomorrow!
Me: ((mutters silent)) Uh.. Never mind...
Kurayami: HAHAHAH! GOOD JOB KAIRI! HAHAH!
Riku: Give me your tv or i'll kill you! ((growls and puts his blade under Kairi's chin.))
Kairi: ((Gulps and smiles swiftly.)) It's in the room Miku, uh Riku.
Kurayami: Miku! HAAHAHA MIKU!
Me: NOMORE SHARP STUFF FOR YOU KURAYAMI!
Kurayami: NOOOOOOOOOO! ((Cries))
Riku: ((Runs to the livingroom and kisses the tv in relief putting it on his Opera
show.)) God I think my gel hadn't staid good!
Me: ((Slaps her head.)) Oh I make him look like an idiot not?
Kurayami: Yup. Sharp stuff?
Me: ... okay okay here ((gives sharp stuff to Kurayami))
Kurayami: YAY SHARP STUFF!
Kairi: ((Looks at him and finally sits next to him kissing his neck.)) Riku I love you, I have always loved you.'
Riku: ((Looks at her annoyed.)) Go bother Sora remember? ((Pushes Kairi away)) I have to look at my Opera winfrey show.
Kairi: ((Starts crying painfully and runs away getting struck by lightning.))
Riku: ((Looks at her irritated and shrugs.)) Quess i'll have to pay for her funeral? ((Continues to look at his show, sighing deep when he hears a girl telling him he is beautifull.))
Selphie: Riku! Riku Look at me i'm a Natasha Bedingfield!' ((Selphie come's in waving her arms like she's flying.))
Riku: ((Mouth falls open in shock.))
Selphie: ((Starts singing Unwritten.)) Staring at the blank page before you open up the dirty window! Let the sun illumnate that you can not find reaching for something in the distance so close you can almost taste it releas your inabitions feel the rain on your skin!
Riku: ((Pushes hands against ears.)) God no! Jezus Christ don't do this to me!
Me: God this is crazy! Selphie singing Unwritten I can see it for me!
Kurayami: ... Heheh...
Riku: ((Glares up.)) And you whoever miss smart ass is shut up!
Me: ((Mutters softly and shrugs.)) Hate having a weak spot for you.
Kurayami: Sharp stuff and blood?
Me: Shut up Kurayami...
Riku: ((Glares at Selphie and grabs a knot propping it in her mouth.))
Selphie: Bwiku bwat bwe bwell?
Riku: ((Ties ropes round Selphie's hands and feet leaving her lying on the ground sobbing soft, returns to his tv show.)) Gods finally silence. ((Smiles satisfied until...))
Me: Please whoever that is don't make him crazy!
Kurayami: YAY!
Sora: Riku! ((Cheery voice of Sora embracing his best friend and kissing him everywhere.))
Me: ((Mouth falls open while looking at Riku and Sora.)) What the...? I didn't made them like this...
Kurayami: YAY!
Me: ((Glances at Kurayami suspicious)) KURAYAMI!
Kurayami: YAY SHOUNEN-AI!
Sora: I'll admit it I love you Riku! I love you sooooooooo much!
Riku: ((Mouth falls open while he looks at Sora in shock and disgust)) Sora, Go bother Kairi! Can't you see i'm watching my great debute!'
Sora: ((Sulks and shuffles with feet.)) Kairi's gone, Poof she just vanished, and I don't care cause I finally know I love you Riku!' ((Embraces Riku again.))
Riku: ((Shudders and gulps while looking at the boy in front of him.)) S-Sora?
Sora: ((looks up with love written on his forehead.)) Yes my love?
Riku: ((Smacks Sora of off him.)) You drunk again! And you used coke! Damn it I thought you stopped!
Sora: ((Looks at him and starts to swing on his feet.)) 'Riiiikkkkuuuu! I wuuffffff yooouuu!
Riku: ((Looks at Sora in horror and steps away if Sora take's a step closer.)) Sora... Just get the Hell outta here, I think your... Ohno my show! ((Swirls back to show and sighs in relief if he sees it's a pause.)) Now listen to me Sora, we'll go to your mommy we together and you'll go bother her okay?
Sora: ((Embraces Riku again and nods.)) Back home. Yeah home!
Riku: ((Walks to Sora's home with Sora hanging on his body)) Jezus Christ what have I done to deserve this? ((Sighs deep and knocks on the door of Sora's mother, mother opens the door looking at Sora like this is normal.))
Sora's mom: Hic, I swe the thet Sowa is dwunk again. Hips. ((Walks to a bush and starts vomitting.))
Riku: ... Ques he's not the only one. ((Make's sure Sora releashes him and looks around.))
Sora: M-mom I wuff you! Shaaall wee makee lovvvvve tonight?
Riku: ((Mouth drops open, shrugs and walks back home.)) Oh God my show! ((Runs to two teenagers, actually bishonen captures.)) H-hey! Do you have a little tv so that I can see a show I don't wanna miss?
Girls: ((Look at him and shrug)) Sure here, but we wanna look to! It seems a very important someone is on tv.
Me: Bwuahahahaha! ((Whistles innocently if Riku glares up.))
Kurayami: Aw... I wanted Shounen-ai...I WILL ALWAYS GET WHAT I WANT MARK MY WORDS!
Me: heheh... maybe...
Kurayami: Sharp stuff and blood!
((Show continue's the girls see Riku and then look at the boy.)) Your that boy!
Riku: ((Looks at the two girls in horror.))
Melsey: I may catch him Chelsey! You have Sora!'
Chelsey: ((Shakes her head fiercely.)) You have Sora Melsey! Riku's cuter and he isn't an alcoholic! ((Starts bickering about Riku and Sora, Riku sneaks away with the tv in his hands.))
Melsey: There he goes follow him!
Riku: ((Starts to run away continuesly looking behind and at the tvscreen not looking in front of him, causes him to fall over a rock right into the mud)) Patoe blegh ughe ughe. ((Lays down silent, sees how the two girls follow their way.)) Man this would've never happened if that stupid square enix didn't filmed my whole life!
Darkside: ((Comes to him singing Genie in a bottle by Christina Quilera.))
Riku: Sora beat you up three times you should be dead meat by now stupid thing!
((Growls dangerously and continues his way back home if all of a sudden. Bonk.))
Wakka: Eh man are you okay?' ((Walks over to him))
Riku: Yeah i'm fine.
Wakka: ((Glares at him and picks up his ball stroking it gently)) Eh man I was talking to my precious! You hurted her! Sweet little ball, it's okay don't cry Wakka is still here for you ya? We will gets them those stupid humans we will gets them all! ((Wa-lks away while stroking his ball.))
Riku: ... Someone has to call the nuts house for him. ((Walks further looking at a brunette men walking over to him swinging his sword like a little child.))
Squall: Ellone! I'll find you! Hiccup... I'll kill Ultimecia! Hiccup and maybe Seifer cuz I hate him... hiccup. ((Riku finally notice it's Squall Leonheart acting like an idiot. Squall notices Riku and points his sword at him.)) SEIFER IN YOUNG AGE! hiccup.
Riku: ((Gulps while looking at Squall.)) Now take it easy it's m-me! Riku!
Squall: ((Starts roaring and follows Riku till he falls on the ground vomitting.))
Riku: Gross... I have to say.. It's a weird day. ((Shrugs while walking further seeying Goofy barbecueing an duck that looks very much like Donald...)) ... Ah good riddance.
Goofy: Gawrsh Riku! You wanna bite to?
Riku: ((Shrugs and shakes his head.)) Nah just had my diner, and after I saw two peoples vomit I don't think i'm hungry.
Bakira: Ahahahahah well one thing is clear Sammie... your an insane bitch!
Me: Well, we'll have to live with it I mean let's see I have tons of
imagination! and i'm not a bitch bitch!
Bakira: Bitch!
Me: Whore!
Bakira: Bitch!
Me: Whore!
Riku: ((Glares up)) SHUT UP YOU MOTHERFUCKING CRAZY BITCHES!
Me&Bakira: ((look at him in surprise))
Riku: That's better. ((Walks further being pissed of because he's missing his show. The tv broke because he had fallen on it. All of a sudden a men appears in front of him his arm wrapped in his coat and a huge sword behind his back.)) Uh... Hi?
Auron: ((Looks at Riku from behind his sunglasses.)) Am I here in Zanarkand?
Riku: What the Hell is a Zanarkand?
Tidus: ((Pops up out of nowhere.)) EY AURON! Has been a long time!
Auron: ((Looks at Tidus in shock)) Tidus... You shrunk.
Tidus: ((Looks at himself and nods.)) My new look! Wakka's here too!
Auron: So i'm not in Zanarkand? ((Riku shakes his head while Auron is blushing fiercely.)) Must've made a wrong turn... bye then. ((Dissapears while leaving Tidus behind sobbing.))
Tidus: NOOOOO! BRING ME BACK TO YUNA!
Riku: ((Smiles wickedly at Tidus and summons his sword.)) Say Tidus... I had to kill you right?
Tidus: ((Looks at him in horror and all of a sudden falls in a hole again.))
Riku: Hmm... Strange very strange... ((Riku glares down and walks further seeying Yuffie and Aeris singing simple and clean.))
Aeris&Yuffie: When you sway away! You won't hear us say! Please oh boy moremore!
Riku: ((Slaps his hand against his head and looks at the two girls humiliated.))
Yuffie&Aeris: Pimple and grey is the way that i'll paint you! Today! It's nice to do!
Riku: ((Sighs deep and walks further.))
Aeris&Yuffie: The dirty things you made me do were all I need. They're kissing me, that's when you kicked my ass and said! Wish I could kill you softly but now I have to go so soon bye bye bye! ((Both dissapear mysteriously))
Riku: ((Looks around seeying Cloud sobbing on the floor with an dead Sephiroth on his knees.))
Cloud: He's dead Riku! He had a n overdosis of pills said he couldn't take it anymore all those fangirls screaming for him...T.T
Riku: ((Looks at Cloud and shrugs.)) What's the big deal?
Cloud: ((Starts to cry harder.)) He didn't left me his money! and I wanted to kill him! He knew I wanted to kill him! And yet here he is killed by an overdosis of stuff. He did it to tease me i'm sure of it!
Riku: ((Scratches his head in surprise.)) Uh... Just grab the money he's dead anyway.
Cloud: ((Face lights up)) Yes! Thank you Riku your my savior! .
Riku: Yeah whatevah... -.-;;;; ((Walks further to home suddenly seeying King Mickey with Queen Minney and Daisy Duck.)) Wow gosh now I've seen everything your fucknisny!' ((Make's a picture of the king kissing Daisy and Minney.))
Riku: Hihihi i'm gonna ask much and lots of money for this!
Me: Uh... It's lots and lots of money...
Kurayami: Yay! LOTS AND LOTS OF SHARP STUFF!
Riku: Yeah whatever! Go do what you have to do like going to bed! it's almost eleven a clock!
Me: ...Didn't say a thing...
Kurayami: ... he's not nice...
Riku: ((Walks further seeying his house and then his father drops in front of him.)) Dad? Did you use my drugs again?
Father: ((Looks at his son with a dazed smile and nods.)) Yeah and I am a bird Riku look at me! ((Walks to a cliff and jumps of . View goes to the brains and blood of his father splattered all over the place.))
Riku: ... Uh... I think I just lost my second parent. ((Stands still for a few minutes and then smiles wickedly.)) Cool! . That means I have the whole house for me and only me! ((Steps inside his house looking if he just could see the last part of Opera winfrey, but no... It was over.)) There goes my debute... T.T.
((All of a sudden Ansem and Maleficent come out talking to eachother.))
Ansem: We have to find that Riku and KILL HIM!
Riku: ((Looks at Ansem in shock then runs away screaming.)) No not again not again! WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!'
Maleficent: Bother... I wanted to tell him he won the grand prize for staying cool under every situation, but when he saw you Ansem he flipped. He went nuts, what have you done to him?'
Ansem: Bwuahahahahahahahahah... ahem I possesed him and made his heart getting controlled by the Heartless. That's all I swear! ((Innocent voice))
Maleficent: Ahh, if that's everything. Cup of tea?
Ansem: Yeah please.
O.O
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Me: Next chap will be up soon... heheh sorry for the weird stuff and all I felt like writing this down... real sorry...
Kurayami: THEIR WILL BE SHOUNEN-AI IN IT MARK MY WORDS!
Me: Yeah yea...
Kurayami: THE WORDS OF A THIEF QUEEN WHO LOVES SHARP STUFF AND BLOOD!
Me: You tell that everytime...
Kurayami: Anyway R&R YAY! ((Throws Riku plushies))
Me: Heheh...