Disclaimer: I hate disclaimers. That's all...
Lol just kidding, of course. But seriously. The one thing I love more than disclaimers are One Shot Slash stories. They make me make this face -- :-D Sooo... Don't like it? Kiss my rump! Just for a minute let's all do the bump! Err... Sorry. Family Guy stuck in my head. But yeah. I know this is one shot. I know this is slash (remember folks, I wrote it...), and if you really don't like it, don't read it! Only makes sense... And now, on with the show!
Unstoppable Force
"I'm flattered," Joker began, stepping out of the shadows, "You came alone."
"That was the deal." Batman responded, turning to face his new company
"Ah, yes. The deal..." Said Joker, approaching Batman slowly. Cautiously.
It was a night like any other. Cool, damp. Traces of the evening's rain still clung to the pavement beneath their shoes, glistening in the streetlights as they spoke. Gotham Park was unusually quiet tonight, and Batman could only hope that the Joker had nothing to do with the reason why.
"I promise not to kill anybody for a while, and in return you agree to meet me here alone... Hmm..." Joker began, casting his gaze towards the sky thoughtfully, "There's just one tinsy little problem..."
"And what's that?" Batman growled, in an effort to disguise his voice
"Well, frankly, sweetheart... I don't trust you." Joker said with a grin. He threw his arms out to the sides, and with this signal, a half dozen masked men ran out from each direction of the shadows, grabbing at Batman. He tried his best to fight them off, but he could not take all six at once. Within seconds of the attack, he felt a pin prick in his neck, and then his whole body went completely numb underneath him. Batman found himself fighting to stay conscious, but it was all to no avail. He blacked out, and was carried off into the night before the agents in the building behind him even had a chance to react.
Hours must have passed.
Batman awoke with a start. Somewhere in the distance of the plain, dusty room, he could hear Beethoven's "Fur Elise" (his favorite tune) being played much quicker than it had intended to be on a slightly out-of-tune piano. The room being lit only barely by the moonlight, he was not surprised to realize that he had no idea where he was. He could feel a tight, metal grip around his wrists- A grip that was preventing him from moving from the chair he was bound to. He struggled against it for a moment, but to no avail... The binds wouldn't budge. He gave up, and in waiting he sat quietly, listening to the music being played for him. The Joker played so well that it was all but unbelievable that those nimble hands could have ever caused harm. Although Batman could not see him, he knew that the Joker was there, playing for him the tune he knew his captive secretly loved. Batman gave another futile tug at the chains that bound him to the chair, causing the Joker to abruptly stop playing the beautiful melody. There was a faint jingling of metal from the shadows as the Joker stepped out
"Looking for these?" He said, jingling the keys in Batman's view like a trophy.
"Why am I here?" Batman growled, tugging at his restraints
"Because..." Joker responded, licking his scar, "When I said I wanted to talk alone, I guess I kind of meant... Without anyone else there."
"What do you need to talk about that's so private?" Batman asked, staring at the Joker intently through the dim light
"You." He responded, gaging Batman's reaction. "Months ago, we made a deal. You had your chance to take me out for good, and for a moment, I really believed that you were going to. But... No. No, no. You just couldn't do it, SO... You agreed to let me go. Because you knew I wanted something from you. I wanted to meet with you one-on-one, and if I wanted to do that, I had to agree to do something for you in return- Stop blowing things up..." He paused, "I mean... Do you have any idea how boring these last few months have been? I don't even have basic cable! And have you ever tried to play Yahtzee with two Schizophrenics and a Sociopath? Good God."
Batman looked at him quixotically.
"Look," Joker continued, lowering his voice a bit, "I just want to know one thing. After you let me go, you had your little puppets tell the media that I was 'The one that got away', and that 'you wish you could have held me longer'... In custody, that is. Yeah. Real subtle, Bats. I guess I'm just wondering if there's anything you... Uh... Want to share with the class?"
Batman was silent. His eyes were locked on the Joker, who now moved closer to him... Sickeningly close. Joker rested his hands on either of Batman's plated shoulders before lowering himself onto Batman's lap, straddling the chair facing him. Batman's natural reaction was to recoil in disgust, but he soon realized there weren't many places he could go. The Joker leaned in, and placing his head dreamily on Batman's right shoulder, he whispered softly to him
"Come on, don't be shy... Tell the truth and shame the Devil..." He cooed
"You're sick." Batman finally barked, realizing only moments later that that was probably a poor choice of words. At his current angle, he could barely see the twisted smile creep across the Joker's face, but it was there. Joker leaned softly into Batman's body, nuzzling his own painted face into the other man's neck. Without realizing what he was doing, Batman tilted his head back slightly, encouraging the touch to continue, but he snapped back to reality when he felt a hot, wet trail of saliva run slowly up his neck to the bottom of his ear. He squirmed a bit a this, but the Joker held him tightly in place.
"What the Hell are you doing?!" Batman snapped, looking more surprised than angry
"What you have been too chicken shit to do all along" Joker responded, pulling himself uncomfortably closer on the Dark Knight's lap, grinding against him slightly
Before Batman had a chance to respond, the Joker pulled him into a deep kiss, chests pushed firmly together, ruby colored face paint smearing slightly onto the face of the Dark Knight. As expected, Batman squirmed in discomfort for a few seconds, attempting to push the intruder away, but to the Joker's surprise, he then began to relax into the kiss. Joker had dreamed of this moment for many, many long nights but he hadn't even dared to dream that Batman would ever return his passion. He pulled back in surprise, not sure if what he was feeling was real, or just Batman giving up and not bothering to fight back anymore
Brown eyes locked with blue for a moment, but neither man dared to speak. Batman stared nervously at the Joker, not wanting to break the silence.
Bruce Wayne had been with hundreds of fake, clingy, money hungry women in the past who were barely able to dress themselves, let alone maintain a conversation, and not a single one of them were capable of making him feel the way he felt right now. There was a heavy sense of desperation in the air, and for a moment he felt... Needed. To everyone else in the world he was disposable, but to the Clown Prince, he was irreplaceable. He could see it in the dark, painted eyes of the Joker.
Joker was still reeling in shock, as he watched Batman's expressions change subtly under his mask. There was an unspoken sense of understanding between them tonight, and for the briefest of moments, the Joker felt... Not quite loved, as he knew he would never experience that feeling until his dying day, but... Accepted. Maybe. And really, that's all he could ever ask for.
Maintaining the silence, he kissed Batman again, harder this time. Joker could still feel the Bat trembling nervously beneath him as he slid his tongue against Batman's lower lip slowly. He felt his captive's mouth open slightly, almost as if a pleading sigh were trying to escape, but before the Joker had the opportunity to seize the moment, Batman jerked forward sharply, pushing Joker back a bit
"Enough." Batman snarled, trying to maintain his dignity while he caught his breath
"Oh, now that's not what your body is saying..." Joker replied, licking his lip with a sideways smirk
He stood halfway up, crouching over Batman's tethered form, and reached his hands under himself to Batman's knees. Squeezing forcefully as he went, he moved his hands up Batman's legs, massaging them through the thick leather. Batman's eyes closed, relaxing into the strong touch, and his breath grew steadily ragged with every motion. When the Joker's expert hands reached the armored thighs of his nemesis, he pulled them apart slowly, with a steady force. Before Batman became conscious enough to resist the feeling, Joker had spread his knees wide apart, and then positioned himself back on top of Batman, now resting comfortably on his lower abdomen and hips. His blood red lips met Batman's once more in an effort to keep him from spoiling the moment, and while doing so, his hands found the padded legs of his prisoner once more. He used his nails to scratch a hard path all the way from Batman's knees up his inner thighs, before his hands came to rest more delicately on his captive's groin. Through the heavy padding of his costume, Batman could barely feel the touch, but he knew exactly where the Joker's hands were. The ghostlike touch through the heavy material caused Batman's body to tense and ache for more attention, his mouth opening slightly to release a quiet moan. This time, the Joker seized his opportunity, luring Batman's tongue out for a soft, tantalizing wrap with his own.
Joker felt himself breathing more heavily himself now, as Batman's soft, wet tongue probed his mouth, tangling and dancing with him in the moonlight. He longed to explore that tongue more thoroughly, and in many different ways, as he wrapped his arm around Batman's back, pulling him closer, and deeper into the kiss. He sucked playfully on the tongue of the Dark Knight before separating, breaking their kiss momentarily to see a lust filled look in his Bat's eyes, pleading for more than he would ever dare ask for. Joker knew he had him right where he wanted him, and he rose to his feet, standing between the legs of his bound captive. Maintaining eye contact, he lowered himself to a kneeling position before the Dark Knight, placing a gloved hand on either of his prisoner's knees. He grinned wickedly at the tortured look of pleasure on Batman's face as he forced his legs apart again slowly, as far as they could comfortably go. Batman was silent, lost in bittersweet arousal as the Joker snaked his body between Batman's legs, pressing his chest firmly into the other man's groin before resting his head on Batman's stomach. He pulled himself closer, applying deliberate pressure to Batman's tingling nether regions as he spoke
"Now what to do about that utility belt...?" He said mockingly, running a long, slender finger along the edge of Batman's belt
"Please..." Batman pleaded between short, rhythmic gasps, "Please stop. We can't do this..."
"Shhh... Nonsense, darling." Joker replied calmly, reaching carefully for the clasp of the belt, "No one has to know, and I promise to be gentle..."
That same, wicked smile crept back across the Joker's face, and Batman wasn't sure if he should be excited or alarmed by the comment. His head tilted back in ecstasy as he felt the haunting touch of the Joker's hand fiddling with the clasp of the belt for a moment before it clicked open, and fell loose around him. Joker grabbed it, and placed it next to them on the floor before sliding back between Batman's legs, brushing tenderly against his plated groin once more. Just as he reached his hands up to run them over Batman's hard, armored chest, an annoying polyphonic noise cut through the silence from nearby.
Joker reached through the darkness for a small, glowing light on Batman's utility belt, glanced at it, and then back at Batman before slumping down in front of him disappointedly.
"Uh oh..." He said, faking interest, "Gotham's on fire and this time it's not my fault..."
He looked back up at Batman, who had already begun to recover from his previous state. Batman's eyes were now full of concern, knowing that the next few moments were crucial for him in saving the city. The Joker wasn't one to be reasoned with, especially when something he wanted was at stake, and this was obviously something he had put a lot of thought into. He would take whatever it was that he wanted whenever he wanted, and no little five-alarm fire could convince him otherwise.
"Joker..." Batman tried hopelessly, "Please... Let me go."
The look on Joker's face wasn't very reassuring as he crossed his arms on Batman's leg, resting his head in his hands
"I can't let you go now," He responded distantly, "I finally got you here..."
"Please," Batman begged again, "If you love someone, you have to let them go."
The Clown Prince paused a moment, mulling this over, before reaching back around Batman's waist in what seemed like a firm embrace. Batman was just about certain that he would have to fight for his freedom, when he heard the muffled 'click' of the pin releasing his handcuffs, his wrists falling loose to his sides. Without making eye contact, Joker stood silently, and walked around to the back of Batman's chair to the only window in the room, keeping his back to him the whole time. Batman turned his head slightly to face him, before realizing something that really rattled him to the bone- Of all the times he had fought the Joker, beating him within an inch of his life each time, he had never once hurt him as much as he had right now. Batman paused, and for a moment he genuinely considered staying, but the small, glowing light on the floor was an unfortunate reminder of his responsibilities to the citizens of Gotham. A responsibility he could not afford to take lightly. In silence, he gathered his utility belt in his hands, and walked guiltily toward the door. He glanced over his shoulder at the Joker once more, still standing in silence with his back turned, before he exited the room.
When the Joker heard no more motion behind him, he turned to face the abandoned doorway. He wasn't surprised to see that Batman had left, but part of him was still hoping that he had stayed. More lonely now than he had ever been in the past, Joker dragged his feet back to the dusty old piano. He plopped down onto the bench with one elbow on the keys and his head resting heavily in his hand. He paused for a long moment before his available hand began tapping out the notes to "Fur Elise" once more, echoing in the Joker's loneliness. What Batman didn't know was that "Fur Elise" was the ONLY tune he knew how to play. Joker had learned it just to impress him. And now he sat in solace, tapping out each heartbreaking note into the seemingly endless black abyss, going over Batman's words again and again in his head: "If you love someone, you have to let them go..."
Suddenly, a loud 'thud' coming from the small window behind him caused him to stop playing the nostalgic tune. He approached the window cautiously, opening it only wide enough to peek out of it. From the corner of his eye he saw a Bat-o-rang lodged deeply into the side of the window, right near the glass, a folded piece of white paper held firmly underneath it. Gripping the paper with one hand, he yanked the Bat-o-rang out of the wall, pulling both inside. Carefully, he unfolded the paper, and in the moonlight he could make out the barely legible words that read:
"And if they return to you,
they'll be yours forever."
The note was signed with a little sketch of a bat. Peering back out the window, Joker searched the horizon for any signs of the note's sender. He thought for a moment that he saw a brief flash of black cape disappear into an alley behind a nearby building, but he couldn't be sure. Instead, he just clutched the note, and the tiny piece of metal to his chest as he returned quietly to the bench of the piano. He thought back briefly on the situation before setting the two objects down on the bench beside him. A thoughtful smile spreading across his face, he began to play once more...