Author's Note: This began as a joke and as a dare and was written years ago. I'm sure this isn't the first of its kind and I'm sure this is probably not one of the finer examples either. I've always been told by those who have read it that it was quite good, but now I need some tougher critiques to improve as a writer, so I thought I'd give it a go and post it here. So here you are: Twilight in Regency setting. It doesn't follow the original chapter for chapter and certain things/circumstances have been changed. This is written tongue in cheek and I hope I don't offend any fans. Thanks for reading.

~Preface~

Miss Isabella Swan, though she had ample reason to do so in the last few months, had never given much thought as to how her life would end. Even if she had, however, she could not have imagined it ending quite like this.

She looked, her breath oppressed, across the long dark room into the black eyes of the man she had come to call 'the hunter'.

As this part of our narrative is meant to be ambiguous, here being set at a time near the conclusion and unaccountably placed in the forefront of the telling, we shall not name said hunter. We can however say that he stared, pleasantly, back.

Surely, thought Isabella, it was acceptable to die in the place of someone she loved. This noble thought might be attributed to her being frightened out of their wits; for however noble the thoughts of a young girl, she might be better relied upon to run away from the slightest suggestion of approaching death. We can argue, however, that our heroine was a very special sort of girl.

She knew she would not be facing death had she not gone to -rks. Detestable place! No! Happy, happy, beloved place! Terrified as she was, these thoughts must intrude. We can not account for the turnings of one's mind when subjected to nigh insurmountable terror. Miss Isabella Swan could still ponder that she could not even now regret the decision of removing to -rks. That removal had brought her such happiness as she had never dreamed of - to have met with such joy from the most unthinkable quarter, in such a place as can considered too green and wet to be habitable! Lions and lambs; how she blushed to think of those words and those moments spent in such sparkling company!

The hunter smiled amiably as he walked slowly towards her.

~In Which Our Heroine Sees 'Them'~

It was in the company of her newly made acquaintances that our heroine first saw them. In an attempt to be mysterious I here introduce a pronoun without due ceremony. Luckily, a proper introduction will be expeditiously given to dear reader if not to our heroine; but first a description.

They were, all of them, standing in one corner of the room. There were five and they stood, grave and silent, a little farther away from the rest of the company. They did not engage in conversation with the rest of the room. They kept to themselves. While everyone else was occupied with whispering and staring at our heroine - a new arrival and hence very interesting - they appeared quite indifferent. This gave her a chance to glance and wonder at them without fear of discovery.

It should be mentioned that as our heroine has commanded her new friends to call her Bella, we shall adopt the same practice.

Bella had every reason to glance repeatedly. There was always curiosity to account for and their apparent indifference to herself might be considered interesting indeed. That, however, was not why she was so inclined to glance-but I am anticipating. We shall arrive at that later.

There were three gentlemen and two ladies. A gentleman of with a tall imposing figure was all that she could notice at first; a man with dark hair, and very broad, muscular shoulders. He seemed the most jovial of the group, or perhaps had the most open expression for they were all very haughty indeed. The next gentleman had fair hair, and though even taller than the first was also slightly thinner. The last was slighter still, though his form was by no means unpleasant. He looked younger than the other two and had untidy, bronze-colored hair. I will leave it to you, dear reader, to imagine the exact tint of those locks. For herself, Bella shall call it bronze.

The ladies were as opposite as could be to each other. One was tall with an exquisite figure and shimmering golden hair. The other lady was very dainty, pixie-like, with very dark hair.

Here we arrive at the reason for Bella's unwonted interest. You might notice that a description of their features has been blatantly omitted. It has been omitted heretofore to give it greater significance. It shall be explained presently.

At first glance, they did not look alike, and yet Bella, must admit that they were all exactly alike! Unaccountable to be sure but perhaps forgivable.

They were all pale; paler than anyone Bella had ever seen in this sunless town. They all had very dark eyes and appeared to have passed a sleepless night. Their features were all so exquisite and perfect. And to add force to this likeness, their faces, so different yet so similar, were all so beautiful that it left her quite devastated. It was hard for her to decide which of the five devastated her more, the golden-haired lady or the bronze-haired gentleman.

She observed that they were all looking away, away from each other, away from the other people present, away from anything in particular as far as she could tell. We are left to wonder where exactly they were looking at with all this 'looking away'. After a while the dainty, dark haired girl separated herself from her family and walked towards the tea table to return her cup. Bella was entranced. She had never seen anyone walk with such grace and elegance. It might be said that this manner of walking devastated her also.

She could help herself no longer and at the first pause of the talkative new friend whose name she could not presently recall, she inquired after the group. While she did so the younger, bronze-haired gentleman turned his head in their direction. His eyes, for a moment, rested upon Bella's new friend before turning to her own person. His gaze held hers for the merest of moments and in another second he looked away - even before Bella herself could do so. In that brief meeting of eyes, Bella, whether it mortified her not, saw no flicker of interest appear in him. It was only as if his attention had been called and he was forced to look up in response. Her new friend now giggled at her understandable interest at the young people.

"That is Mr Emmett Cullen and his brother Mr Edward Cullen," said our invaluable informant, "and Mr. Jasper Hale and his sister Miss Rosalie. The girl who walked away is Miss Alice Cullen. They are all charges of Dr. Cullen and his wife," added she in a conspiratorial whisper.

Bella must glance again at the bronze-haired gentleman. Such a specimen of manly beauty as she had never seen before must forever be watched by her. He appeared to be talking now for his lips were moving, but none of his companions seemed to be listening. They didn't give him any notice and yet Bella must assume they were hearing is every word.

They had common enough names. She half-expected them to have fanciful names as is often thought up by impressionable young women in connection with such heroic and beautiful figures. The thought of names brought a sudden, happy recollection to her. This new giggling acquaintance of hers was named Miss Jessica Stanley.

"They...appear very much to advantage," said Bella, judging it best that her observation should be as mild as possible.

"Yes, indeed!" said Jessica with yet another giggle, "I will tell you something. I hope you will not think me such a wretched gossip, but I know you will do me justice for we have become such friends! The word is that there is an understanding between Mr. Emmett Cullen and Miss Rosalie Hale, and also with Mr. Jasper Hale and Miss Alice Cullen! It is all very shocking, is it not? For they live in the same house! I wonder that it is even allowed."

Bella fought to hide her surprise at this pronouncement. She could hear condemnation and censure in her new friend's manner - there was in it also a wicked delight in being able to share gossip with one who was yet ignorant of it.

"May I ask, which of the gentlemen are the Misters Cullen? They do not look like they might be related."

"Oh, they are, though very slightly," said Jessica, her tone still alive with excitement, "Dr. Cullen is very young himself, a gentleman and unaccountably rich!" her voice dipped lower, "He is a physician, but they say that he was also in trade! Which is how he made his fortune, because heaven knows there is no possible way for a man to set up three carriages on a physician's living. Three! The Misters and Misses Cullen are his adoptive sons and daughter- though they are said to be his cousins. The Hales, the brother and sister with fair hair, are said to be Mrs. Cullen's distant relations."

"I think it is to his credit and hers that they chose to support them."

"You might say that," said Jessica with some reluctance.

Throughout this exchange, Bella found her eyes always coming back to that strange family. They continued, unrelentingly, looking away and at nothing in particular. She could not deny that the circumstances surrounding this family was so very mysterious that their dealings might always be looked upon with suspicion. Censure from their neighbors might always be courted.

"Have they always lived in -rks?"

Bella asked this because in her vague memories as a little girl who came to -rks in the summer, she could not remember there being a family like the Cullens and Hales.

"No," said Jessica in a voice that implied that this should be quite obvious. "They started living here only two years ago. They came from somewhere farther North."

Bella felt some pity and relief. She did not know why this should be so, but she felt it nonetheless. They were some of the most handsome and beautiful young people she had ever set eyes upon and yet she felt they must be pitied. Admiration given grudgingly by others was ill compensation for the gossip and talk they must continually endure. The relief came chiefly from the realization that though she was a newcomer in town, she was not the only outsider. To the people of -rks, a difference of two years continuance in a place was apparently of no consequence.

Bella was caught looking once more, and by the same young gentleman. He looked up, this time with some curiosity written in his expression. She looked away but not before noticing that his look held with it some sort of dissatisfaction. How very alarming and yet so interesting was this to her!

"Who is the gentleman with the reddish-brown hair?" she inquired of her new friend.

As she asked her question she stole a look from the corner of her eye. He was still staring. He looked slightly frustrated. She could not account for it at all!

"That is Mr. Edward Cullen." - with a sigh - "Isn't he just the handsomest gentleman you ever saw? But I would not trouble myself if I were you. He prefers to remain unattached. A young lady is yet to exist in this world who is handsome enough to tempt him." The last was said with bitterness.

Bella held back a smile. She wondered since when and how many times her new friend had been slighted by Mr. Cullen. She clearly has not recovered from it, poor girl. Bella glanced once more at Mr. Cullen, and this time his face was turned away. She could see that his cheek appeared to be lifted in a smile.

The Cullens and the Hales did not stay long. And as they left the assembly room Bella was again struck by the grace with which they moved. This was a source of wonder to her and was quite unsettling to watch. She was, however, mistress enough of herself to notice that Mr. Edward Cullen did not look in her direction again.