"Rose, this is - well. An old school friend turned nemesis."

"You have a nemesis? What are you, Batman?" Rose snorted. She turned to the dark-haired man she was being introduced to. "Hello. My name's Rose, Rose Tyler."

The Master raised an eyebrow as she extended her hand towards him, and then shook it warily. He suddenly flashed her a manic grin. "Hello! My name's the Master."

Rose pressed her lips together to hold back a laugh. "The - theMaster?"

"Yes." He looked positively delighted with himself. The Doctor rolled his eyes.

"That's even worse than his, sorry!" she giggled, jerking a thumb in the Doctor's direction.

"Hey!"

"Oi!"

"Anyway," Rose said quickly, "What's going on, then?"

"Did you get my message, Doctor?" the Master asked, whilst keeping his eyes trained on Rose.

"Yes." The Doctor withdrew his psychic paper. "'Catch me if you can,' signed 'the Master.' So original. So innovative. I applaud you." He put the paper away and folded his arms, rocking back on his heels. "So, I caught you. Now what?"

Rose's gaze flittered back and forth between the two men, trying to suss them out.

The Master handed an envelope to Rose, who opened it cautiously. Reading the piece of card inside, her eyes widened. "You're inviting us to a wedding?"

"What?" said the Doctor. He put his glasses on and practically snatched the card out of Rose's hands. "'The Doctor, Plus One, you are cordially invited to -'" His eyes bugged out of his head. "You're gettingmarried?"

"Well, couldn't wait around all my life for you, Doctor," the Master joked. "Nah, found myself a nice little human wife, just like you!"

"I'm not his wife," Rose hurried to correct.

"This is…unprecedented, " the Doctor said, his eyebrows most of the way up his forehead.

"She's very nice," the Master said smugly. "Mine's a blonde one, too."

"Would you cut it out, talking about me and your fiancée like that?" Rose huffed, then murmured under her breath, "'Little human,' 'blonde one;' honestly."

The Doctor glanced at the invitation again. "Lucy Saxon…"

"Where is she, then?" asked Rose curiously.

"Oh, she's back at the TARDIS - "

"You have a TARDIS?" Rose gasped. "Hold on, Time Lord, TARDIS; I forgot to ask the important question of how the hell are you alive?"

"Good point, Rose," said the Doctor.

"Did a little rewriting of my biology to escape the Time War -"

"You mean you used the chameleon arch? To hide?"

"Well - yes. The High Council wanted me to fight. I wanted to survive."

The Doctor and the Master traded a few snide remarks about Gallifrey and the Time War, and Rose listened intently to them both, fiddling with her earring and seriously considering popping back to the TARDIS to fetch some popcorn.

"How did you survive, anyway?" asked the Master.

The Doctor sniffed. "I had to end it."

"So you used it, then? The Moment?"

"Yes."

The Master shook his head at him. "Didn't think you'd have it in you."

Rose slipped her arm through the Doctor's, easing his flinch at the Master's words. "He had to do it," Rose said, with conviction. That was what the Doctor had told her, and she believed in him.

"There's really no one else left?" the Master said quietly.

"Nope. Just us chickens."

"Well, then. You have to come."

"Sorry?"

"You have to come to the wedding! If there's no one else left, there's no one to be my best man."

Rose turned her face into the Doctor's shoulder and hid her grin in the sleeve of his jacket.

"Wait, what?" demanded the Doctor.

"And don't think you're getting off lightly, Miss Tyler. Lucy hasn't got many friends at the moment, what with them all being so boring and disapproving about our elopement, so - "

"What?" repeated the Doctor.

" - so you, Rose, you can be her maid of honour. Yes?"

"What?" the Doctor said yet again.

"Well, Rose, what do you say?"

"I - um," Rose stammered for a response. "I don't really - Doctor?"

"Come on, Doctor, don't be dull. We're having the wedding in a castle on Delphinea! It's going to be quite spectacular, if I do say so myself."

"This is either a really elaborate trap," the Doctor mused, "Or you are not who you say you are."

"Is it so hard to believe that I've found a woman to love and settle down with?"

"You hate humans! You used to try to kill my companions!"

"That wasn't 'cos they were human - well, all right, all right. Maybe I was a little…xenophobic, in my younger days. Still, Lucy is…well, she's quite something."

"Can we meet her, then? This famous Lucy?" asked Rose deliberately.

"What, you need proof?"

"If I'm gonna be her bloody bridesmaid, I'm gonna need to meet her first, right?"

"Ah, yes. So, you'll do it?"

Rose nodded cautiously, shooting a glance at the Doctor, who was staring at her with wide eyes.

"Yay! And you, Doctor? Will you be in attendance?"

The Doctor coughed uncertainly. "Er…I'm not going to have to make a speech, am I? How human is this wedding going to be, exactly?"

"Human enough to appease Lucy. But let's just say the fireworks aren't going to be Earth fireworks. I'm thinking more…Tresdanian fireworks."

The Doctor rolled his eyes. "You know Tresdanian fireworks are against galactic law."

The Master regarded him with a strange look. "And you know that I've never given two figs about galactic law. I may be getting married, Doctor, but I still have to have a little fun."