(A/N: Here's my first official bit of Doctor Who fanfiction. I don't own the show, hell I was born the year they decided to boot it off the air for a decade and a half. So this contains what will probably be considered spoilers for 'The End of Time' and 'The Eleventh Hour' with some obvious rewrites. This is totally a 10th Doctor/Master and 11th Doctor/Master fic so don't even pretend I didn't warn you. It's very mild, but it's there and if you squint you can see it as an incredibly intense friendship, if you like. Regardless, here comes the fic!)
A Raggedy Doctor's Rumpled Master
You were going down in flames, but I couldn't stay away, I was a moth drawn to the brightness of your fiery demise. I worshiped your radiance, lived in the warmth of your strength, because it's true what the humans say, isn't it? We always burn brightest just before we go into the cold dark. I should have known that it was coming, that you'd be gone from me once again. But I ignored it, I always ignore it.
I was so wrapped up in your spectacle, in you being who you are, burning through your unnatural life, that I forgot that my own was doomed to come to an end. You always could make me forget. Sad, isn't it? That these days the man you are, so different from the man you were, can still fog my mind and twist my hearts. We've both changed so much, and I pray, to every God that I have ever heard of, every night, every single night, for just one more instant of what we once were.
We've hurt each other so much, and I know that at a glance it seems you've caused me the lion's share of the pain, but I'd know that it was a lie. How much have I hurt you, how much did it hurt to hear me deny what you knew to be true? Every injury you've ever laid upon me is not payback enough for my ignorance, for my disbelief of the pain you suffered alone. You could have destroyed me, time and time again, burned through my regenerations in the space of days, hours, and still I would be owing to you.
How could I have made such a mistake? How could I have missed it? How could I believe for even a second that you were anything other than the boy I once knew? You were never mad, you were never insane, but my ignorance and denial…I could have helped. If I had just listened, if I had just let my mind see yours, by the Gods I would know. When we were young, if I could have just heard those infernal drums, I would have known that they were real. And I would have stolen you away. I would have held you close and done everything in my power to save you, to put it right.
I only wish that I could have done something differently, hang the laws of time and paradox and tear you from my own young arms. I would tell you and my foolish self that it was real, that it was all the Lord President's fault. I would send the both of you to a TARDIS, to start a life together that would destroy everything I am, re-write me entirely. I would kill that selfish bastard for lumping the salvation of our entire corrupt, foolish, cold race onto you. And I would fade; give in to non-existence just to know that you were happy.
Even now, my body, my face, everything me about to change, I can't help clinging to you. I can't stop myself from sobbing at the joy of you in my arms. I wanted to say good-bye to all of them, to the ones that helped me along the way in this life. But you always trump everything, you always make me forget. So I pull you closer as the energy of my regeneration begins to burn against me, worse than the radiation, worse than the feeling of your life energy slamming into my hearts. I'm not even sure if you'll ever wake up, if your mind was stolen away when you saved me, but I kiss you anyway. I want this form's last memories of you to be this, and the new body deserves to come around with you in his arms.
The change is violent; it destroys the TARDIS, at least partially. The old girl is going to need some time to recover, that's for sure. But she always does, and she knows that I love her. She's going to be mad, after all, she saved you, brought you to herself, and I go and regenerate. Still though, I'm beyond happy to get to hold you against me, and I swear that I feel your arms tighten around me as my form begins to shift and settle.
My previous mind already feels farther away, and a stream of faces, of former companions, people I had loved fade into the back of my mind. They become nothing more than instances, stepping stones, and dim reflections of formerly intense emotions that I only slightly remember. I will always care for them, never forget them, but right now, all I can feel, and all I can see, is you. You are the constant, you are on my mind, and every regeneration's first thought is of you and invariably so are its last. This time though, I regenerated and woke up to you.
Your eyes are open, smiling brightly when I finally see the world once again. And I dive for your lips, as the TARDIS burns around us, spinning out of control I kiss you because that's all I want. You the man I love, I could stay in your arms forever.
But we have to move, we have to land the TARDIS safely. And it's only when we finally drag ourselves out of the poor abused Police Box in some poor girl's yard that I realize you've changed. I can't feel the chaos of a deteriorating body, your life energy flows through you naturally, in controlled pulses of twin hearts. When I press my forehead against yours I hear nothing save the three words neither of us has been able to say since we were young. I return them unheeded with the biggest smile I can manage.
The child humphs and stamps her foot, and this time, you come along, you get to experience the joy I feel at helping the humans. And little Amelia Jessica Pond will spend years dreaming and talking about her Raggedy Doctor and his Rumpled Master.
(A/N: Yay some happiness for the Doctor, finally! I wish it were cannon, but then I don't think people would take the time to ship it. Regardless, let me know how you like it!)