Sebastian Moran was just a man now.
not an assassin, not a soldier, not even a loved man.
He was just a man.
A song played on the radio in the New York cab as he made way to his new apartment.
"Love of mine, someday you will die, but I'll be close behind, I'll follow you into the dark…"
This song was pretty old, and should be worn down by now. It was one of those songs when at the time had so much meaning and feeling, yet when time went on it would lose the touch and became just a melody and nuisance. This was one- or it should've been.
"No blinding light or tunnels to gates of white, just our hands clasped so tight, waiting for the hint of a spark"
He felt a slight twinge in his chest to look out the window. He focused on the surroundings, the area getting dirtier and shadier as he crossed his arms, the leather of the jacket being a bit stiff.
"If heaven and hell decide, that they both are satisfied, illuminate the NOs on their vacancy signs"
The driver pulled up to the front of a dark looking motel and spoke in a thick accent to ask for the money. Moran handed him what was needed to pay for the ride and headed to the trunk and got his things. It wasn't at all a lot, just clothes and a few pictures, a blanket or two, and a gun packed safely within it all just in case.
"If there's no one beside you, when your soul embarks, then I'll follow you into the dark"
He walked over to the office and signed some papers. It was already arranged that he was going to live there, so it wasn't such a big deal. The man led him to a room and let him in.
It was a lot cleaner than he expected and that gave him some relief. It was almost empty with only a table and chair in there, along with a TV. He placed his bags down and took out the blankets. He placed one on the floor, and another on top for more cushion. It was a nice place, but the floors weren't carpeted. Just wood.
"In Catholic school as vicious as Roman rule, I got my knuckles bruised, by a lady in black"
It's been a couple of weeks now, and Seb had finally gotten a job as a construction worker here in the big apple. His bare motel room was now lively with furniture and the pictures hung up- except for the one he kept in his wallet always.
While on break, all he heard were words and voices talking about their naggy lovers and how they wished they would shut up for once. These men, whose luck was 50x higher than his with their loves still alive took advantage of it.
He wished he had his gun right now.
"And I held my tongue as she told me, "Son fear is the heart of love", So, I never went back"
He returned home this evening after going out on a date with another person. It felt disgusting, to be with someone else. He hated it. He walked over to the sink to get a drink of water and got nothing. He forgot to pay the water bill again.
He could go anywhere, have anything in the WORLD and chooses this. He left him all the money after the… incident. That was sweet of him, but Sebastian couldn't deal with it; having everything but the one person that made him the happiest man in the world.
"If Heaven and Hell decide that they both are satisfied, illuminate the NOs on their vacancy signs"
He sat there on a chair in the middle of the motel room. He held a picture in his hand that contained a dark haired boy sitting on a blonde boys lap, smiling brightly- almost like the laughter from his vocal chords sung throughout the room. He kept his eyes onto the dark haired guy, as he had his other hand covering his mouth, elbows resting onto his legs while hunched over.
"If there's no one beside you, when your soul embarks, then I'll follow you into the dark"
There was only a candle burning, since he hadn't paid his electricity bill. He ran his hand through his hair, it having grown long these past few months. Sebastian looked down for a moment and let the hand cover his eyes to feel his body tremble. Hot liquid ran down his cheek as he bit his lips, sobbing chokes heard throughout the empty area.
"You and me have seen everything to see, from Bangkok to Calgary, and the soles of your shoes are all worn down"
Around him were just photos scattered around. The same man in each one, some with the blonde and some just this dark un-named figure, his eyes the color of coal and hair the color of the sky at night when the stars would shy off.
They traveled the world together when they were young. Starting in London, they searched for nothing more but just happiness. They had it right there together, it's just sad that it all came crashing down. It all didn't add up until it was too late. God, he hated himself for not seeing it before.
"The time for sleep is now, It's nothing to cry about…"
The candle was wearing down, as was the thoughts inside this man's head. For a long time he thought of doing this, but never wanted to pull through with it since he remembered that he would object to this action. He held the gun in his hand, ready to let this piece of lead swirl its way within the mind of Sebastian Moran. He took one last puff of a cigarette, and let it fall to the floor, stomping his shoe on it.
"…'cause we'll hold each other soon, in the blackest of rooms."
His finger slid around the trigger and let it pull; as he expected to feel the hot bullet and air slide within the skull of Sebs', but only found a flower poking out of the muzzle as he stared in disbelief. A laugh was heard echoing throughout this now dark place as a hand was felt on his shoulder. The man looked up and dropped the gun to not believe at what- rather, who he was staring at.
"If Heaven and Hell decide, that they both are satisfied, illuminate the No's on their vacancy signs"
He felt his muscles in his legs move as he was now face to face with what seemed to be an apparition at first. Moran let his hand move up to rest upon the cool cheek of the pale skinned man. The same coal colored eyes, and night colored hair- Him. It's been months since he had last seen him… and now here he was before his very eyes. Just here.
"If there's no one beside you, when your soul embarks"
The un-named man placed his hand onto Sebastian's and smiled softly. Before this small incident, all that was seen in these eyes were a dark glaze but suddenly… it was as if Seb had taken a step back in time. He looked happy, and as in love with Seb as he was with him in their teen years. This dark haired man let their hands drop, to just hold them together before turning to walk toward the door. He led Seb with him and opened up the door. The blondes eyes squinted at the bright light outside as the other turned to face him.
"Then I'll follow you into the dark…"
"Let's go, Sebastian. There's so much more to see… I made a mistake once, and I'm not doing that again… I won't let my mind and jealousy in the way ever again… let's just be happy."
With that, Seb smiled to feel tears slide down his cheeks and nodded. He didn't think about how this happened, or why. He didn't question how he was still here even though the dark haired man shot his brains out. He just went with it. He felt that empty feeling fill up and found a smile upon his face… it's been a while since he's done that. Too damn long.
The two walked out, and never looked back.
"Then I'll follow you into the dark"