So this is a depressing fic about something that would never happen on the show. I guess I wrote this during times when I wasn't in the happiest of moods, hence the sad tone to the story. It doesn't really make a whole lot of sense because like I said, I mainly turned to write this when I wasn't feeling great, but whatever.
I don't usually write sad fanfictions. Do read it and tell me what you think!
Seven days it had been.
Seven days since Valentine's Day.
Seven days since she last kissed him.
Seven days since she last felt his breath on hers.
Seven days since she last saw him alive.
Rachel placed one hand carefully on her tiny belly – she was four and a half months pregnant with their second child.
Two years it had been since the wedding, and both Ross and Rachel could confirm that they'd never been happier. Emma was a bubbly four year old child and with a second one on the way, it seemed they were getting all they'd ever wished for.
But it was almost as if someone up there was jealous and didn't wish the happy couple be happy any longer.
February 14th, 2007, a day Rachel would never forget. It was a day that was supposed to be about celebrating love, not burying it.
2:45 pm, a time Rachel would never forget. It was the time he promised to be home from work, the time he told her he'd be back for lunch.
He broke that promise… He never made it home.
It was Valentine's Day for crying out loud.
How could anyone be so cruel as to take the life of the only one she'd ever loved?
She remembered that they were supposed to go grocery shopping for dinner that night, and they were planning to eat in, after leaving Emma with Grandma and Grandpa Geller. Instead, Ross insisted that he'd go out and get everything & she should rest at home because in her current condition, such outings were just unnecessary.
She wished she had gone.
Both of them could have been in the car that flipped over.
Both of them could have died together, holding hands.
If only she had gone.
Jack and Judy Geller had rushed over just as soon as they'd heard of the accident. When they learned of his death, it was like a part of them had died. They were inconsolable.
Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, and Joey had done the same. Monica was just as much of a wreck as Rachel, and the other three, while battling emotional hell, had to try and be strong for the both of them.
The minute the sister-in-laws met each other, they ran into each others' arms, sobbing uncontrollably. Chandler had to hold them up to make sure neither of them would fall. He was the only one who could somewhat console his wife – nobody else could even get through to her.
Phoebe and Joey were taking care of Rachel – she was the one who needed it most. Joey tried to look less tear-stricken as he asked her if she needed something to drink.
Her response?
"Have you got any poison?"
Phoebe couldn't stand it. She couldn't see her friend like this… she'd immediately gone into the bathroom and cried. She couldn't cry in front of Rachel. It would only make things worse.
Jack, Erica, and Emma were sent into the playroom to keep themselves occupied. None of them knew what was going on; they just couldn't understand why everyone was sobbing so much.
The three year old twins sent their older cousin out to investigate, while they peeked through the slightly opened door.
"Mommy?" Emma questioned, softly padding towards her mother.
"Baby…"
The child looked a little taken aback when she noticed just how different her mother was looking. Her usually sparkling self was replaced with a new, depressed one.
Rachel was visibly trying to hold her tears in, in front of her daughter. She had no idea how to explain to her that her daddy had gone to work this morning and would never come back.
"Mommy, don't cry. I still think you look very beautiful!"
Rachel smiled slightly. Emma was adorable, no doubt, and she honestly appreciated her attempts to cheer her up.
The four year old crawled into her mother's lap and squeezed her tightly.
"I love you, Mommy."
"I love you too, baby."
"Mommy?" Emma whispered.
"Yeah?"
Time for the inevitable question.
"Where's daddy?"
Rachel stifled a sob. "He's in heaven now."
"What's he gonna do there?" she wondered.
"I don't know," her mom admitted. "The angels will take care of him."
"But Daddy always said you were his angel, Mommy."
That was it. Rachel wasn't even going to TRY to hold it in anymore. She clutched Emma tightly and cried for all she was worth.
The young girl was, of course, alarmed. "Mom, I'm sorry! I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you cry!"
Rachel shook her head and sobbed some more.
Chandler came from behind her and rubbed her back. "That's it sweetie, just cry it all out."
"Why are we crying, Uncle Chandler?" Emma asked, her eyes filling up with tears. "Is it because of what I did to Mommy? Because I'm sorry! I really am!"
He scooped her up and kissed her delicate curls. "No Emmy, you didn't do anything. Mommy just misses Daddy a lot."
"But then why did he leave? Can't we call him on his cell phone and tell him that Mommy misses him? That always makes him come home!"
Moistness filled Chandler's eyes and soon his tears found their way to his cheeks. He had no ways to answer his niece's innocent questions.
Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Phoebe come out of the bathroom. He quickly handed Emma to her; Phoebe would be the only one with the slightest idea of how to explain the concept of death to a four year old.
"Hi Emma," she whispered.
"Aunt Pheebs, are you crying too?"
She shook her head, "I'm not now."
"Aunt Phoebe?"
"Yes, princess."
"Why is everybody so sad? Where's my daddy?"
Phoebe sat Emma down on the nearest chair and knelt down to match her level. She motioned for Joey to come over to join them and he did.
"What's wrong?" he asked.
"Nothing, Emma just wants us to explain to her where Ross is."
"Oh." He looked away for a minute.
"Sweetie, your daddy is in a better place now," he began.
Emma interrupted, "But he always says that there is no better place than at home with me and Mommy."
This was going to be harder than they thought.
Phoebe continued, choosing to ignore the child's last statement because it would just complicate things further. "He is in a place called Heaven and he's not going to come back. Maybe Daddy didn't want to leave, but God called him up there."
"Why?"
Joey shrugged, "Maybe he needed him to do some work for him."
"Did he die?" she asked suddenly.
"Yes, sweetie, he did," Phoebe whispered.
"Oh in school, our class' hamster died and then we wrote nice things about him to put up on the wall."
"That's great, kiddo," Joey told her, ruffling her hair.
She paused for a long time, taking time to absorb all this new information. "But am I ever going to see Daddy again?"
"Yes, Emma, you will," Phoebe nodded.
"When?" she asked, demanding to know.
"One day you're going to go to heaven too, and Daddy will be there to greet you."
"Is Mommy going to come too?"
Joey nodded, "Yes, she will go there one day too."
They hadn't noticed Rachel observing this discussion silently from the sofa, and only when they saw her shaking with sobs, did they deem it a reasonable time to end the conversation.
"Go on, Em, your cousins are waiting to play with you," Joey told her.
"Okay."
She stood up and left, walking into the playroom and shutting the door behind her. They figured she was going to explain it to Jack and Erica, but a four year old's description was something they couldn't exactly count on.
Ross and Rachel's tiny apartment was filled with many people now: Chandler, Monica, Jack, Erica, Phoebe, Mike, Joey, Carol, Susan, Ben, Jack, Judy, and of course, Rachel and Emma.
Still, nobody dared talk to Rachel. None of them knew what to say to her. None of them knew how to make her pain go away.
Carol and Susan were naturally upset, but were more concerned of how they would break the news to Ben.
Rachel wordlessly excused herself to go into her bedroom, and much to her surprise, found Monica lying expressionless on her bed.
"Mon," she whispered, tearfully.
Her friend motioned for her to sit on the bed next to her and she did. The two women hugged each other for support and cried their eyes out, sharing their pain with one another.
"Why did my brother have to leave us?" Monica sobbed, holding on to Rachel for dear life.
"I don't know.."
This was the worst Valentine's Day ever, and from that day on, neither Rachel nor Monica would be able to celebrate it the same way again.
That night, after everybody had left with sympathetic wishes and offers for help, Rachel lay in bed with Emma, trying to get her to fall asleep; but the little girl was relentless.
"Mommy, can I sleep with you in your bed tonight?"
"Of course, Emma."
"Aunt Mon told me not to let you stay alone tonight."
Until she'd brought it up, Rachel hadn't even realized that tonight would be the first of many nights she'd have to go to sleep without Ross by her side.
Her daughter wrapped her arms tightly around her and kissed her cheek tenderly. After bending down to plant another kiss on Rachel's stomach, she mumbled "Goodnight" to her mother and soon to be brother or sister.
"Goodnight baby. We love you," Rachel said, stroking Emma's dark hair out of her eyes and gently brushing her lips against her forehead.
Emma turned on her side and whispered, "Good night daddy, we love you…"
Now seven days later, Rachel sat in the OBGYN's office with the news that she would be blessed with a baby boy.
Ross' funeral and memorial service had taken place yesterday, and she still couldn't believe she was a widow.
Emma was ecstatic to hear the doctor announce that she would be a sister to her brother, and Rachel realized that she couldn't be depressed forever. She had to move on for the sake of her family.
She vowed never to love another man again, never to be with another man again.
She didn't need to forget about Ross..
All she had to do was close her eyes and she'd find him right there beside her.