Mechanirassic Park!

Disclaimer: All characters belong to their respective owners. This is just for fun, not for profit.

Chapter 1: Briefing!

A field in Kansas, a week earlier

Boom!

Dirt and corn got thrown up into the air as a strange object slammed into the ground. It kicked up a cloud of dust and pulverized the corn plants that were in the area.

"The hell?!" The farmer exclaimed from the tractor he was riding on. "My corn!" He headed back to his home. He reemerged with his shotgun and ran into the cornfield. "Damned spacemen! That corn is my livelihood!" He carefully moved towards the crater. "If you're a peaceful alien, we can exchange insurance! But if you're a mean alien, then you'd better know we got superheroes here who will kick your space ass!"

The farmer walked towards the smoking crater and pointed his shotgun at it. "Hello? Spaceman?" He looked down at the crater. "Huh. Unless Hortas from Star Trek are real, that ain't no spaceman."

Malibu Base

In the state of California, near the city of Malibu, was a special base commissioned for the elite anti-terror unit known as GI Joe. This base was known as Malibu Base, for obvious reasons. And one of the residents of the base was walking towards a meeting room.

He was a handsome teenager, Japanese in nationality. His posture when he walked indicated his upper-class upbringing. He was wearing a red polo shirt and black slacks, his dark hair in a neat style.

Sunfire. Real Name: Shiro Yoshida. Birthplace: Agarashima, Japan. Affiliations: West Coast Misfits, Big Hero 6. Powers: Body absorbs solar radiation, and can convert it into fiery plasma, which can be used for various effects. Flight.

The Japanese mutant stopped when he noticed two of his comrades walking by. One was a pretty Irish girl, with golden hair. She was dressed in a green t-shirt with khaki slacks.

Siryn. Real Name: Theresa Rourke-Cassidy. Birthplace: County Mayo, Ireland. Affiliation: West Coast Misfits. Physiology: Mutant Human. Powers: Can create sonic vibrations that manifest in the form of a "sonic scream", Flight.

Her male companion was dressed like a metalhead: AC/DC t-shirt, blue leather jacket and jeans, black biker gloves, and studded wristbands.

Wildstar: Real Name: Ace Starr. Birthplace: Los Angeles, CA, USA. Affiliations: West Coat Misfits, Ballroom Blitzers (Lead Vocals, Rhythm Guitar). Physiology: Mutant Human. Powers and abilities: Lion-like mutation grants superhuman strength, speed, reflexes, reaction time, flexibility, and reaction time. Can fire blue energy beams from claws, and has healing factor.

"Hey, Shiro." Theresa smiled at her compatriot. The Japanese mutant blinked in confusion.

"What on Earth are you two doing?" He asked.

"We're going to the Pit." Theresa explained.

"For what purpose?"

"There's some big wedding going down." Ace explained. "Sounds like it'll be interesting." (1)

"I was surprised Ace wanted to come." Theresa smiled. "I kind of thought he'd find a wedding too boring."

"I did at first." Ace admitted with a shrug. "But then a Joe was getting married. Which meant the wedding might actually be fun."

"I...see." Shiro said. "I will admit, it is a bit of an inconvenience right now." He frowned and crossed his arms. "We have a mission. And we could use you to lead us."

"I know, I know." Theresa nodded. "But as leader of the West Coast Misfits, I have to represent me team down there."

"I see." Shiro nodded. "Well, I hope the Joes have kept this void in mind when putting together this mission."

"I'm sure they have." Theresa smiled. "It'll be fine."

"Yeah man, don't worry about it." Ace grinned, giving the Japanese mutant a playful smack on the shoulder. "They wouldn't leave us high and dry."

"I hope not." Shiro went on his way. "Have fun at the wedding."

"Thanks, Shiro!" Theresa waved happily. "Good luck to ye and the others!" She and Ace headed out. Shiro walked into a meeting room. He noted some of the other occupants. One was a handsome young Latino teenage boy, his brown hair put in a ponytail. He was wearing a white t-shirt with a sleeveless black leather jacket that had studs on the lapels, and blue jeans. He had a 3DS in his hands, tongue out as he concentrated on his game.

Rictor. Real Name: Julio Esteban Richter. Birthplace: Guadalajara, Mexico. Affiliation: West Coast Misfits. Physiology: Mutant Human. Powers and abilites: Seismic wave generation. Geokinesis.

Another was a teenage girl, wearing a yellow-and-black biker jacket with a black t-shirt, and black leather pants. She typically had her nose in a book. The book was a small trade paperback, the cover depicting Captain Jean-Luc Picard, Wesley Crusher, and a Klingon with a starfield background and a pentagon-shaped spaceship flying over it.

Talon. Real Name: X-23, given the name Athena Logan. Birthplace: HYDRA Facility, Unknown location. Affiliation: West Coast Misfits. Physiology: Artificially-created Mutant Human. Powers and abilities:

And a third was another teenage girl, this one having a rather sunny disposition: A blue-eyed blond bombshell, her hair styled to resemble the late Farrah Fawcett's famous 1970s hairdo. She was wearing a white-and-pink blouse with a pair of white jeans. She quietly bopped to the music playing from her iPod, her blonde hair bouncing with her head.

Dazzler. Real Name: Alison Blaire. Birthplace: New York, New York. Affilation: West Coast Misfits. Physiology: Mutant Human. Powers and abilities:

"Hello, everyone." Shiro greeted his teammates. They all looked up at his as he took a seat next to Julio.

"Hey." They all greeted in various ways. Alison looked over at Athena.

"Whatcha reading there, Claws?" The blonde asked. She looked over at the cover. "Star Trek, huh?"

"Strike Zone." Athena answered. "Kyle let me borrow it. He's got a ton of these. Says this one is pretty good." (2)

"Figures." Alison shrugged. "Kyle is a big ol' nerd for that stuff? You enjoying it so far?"

"It's pretty good so far." Athena shrugged. "I'm at the part where the Klingons get into a brawl with the Kreel."

"Oh." Alison blinked. "That looks like a pretty old book."

"It is. Kyle said it was published in 1989."

"1989! Good Gawd, that's old." Alison snickered. Athena shot the blonde a look.

"You listen to music that's even older. You shouldn't talk."

Shiro watched the two girls converse. He then turned to Julio. "Do you know why we have been summoned here?"

"A mission, I guess." The Mexican earth-shaker shrugged, eyes on his game. "I'm guessing the Joes who're supposed to brief us were a bit late."

Shiro scowled and crossed his arms. "Hardly the way to run an efficient organization." The Japanese mutant grumbled. He then looked over at Juilo's 3DS. "What game are you playing?"

"Pokemon Sun." Julio answered with a smile. "It's a lot of fun, man. I finally got to the second island."

"That's...nice." Shiro nodded.

"Kyle's got Moon." Rictor then started to grumble. "Little punk is so far ahead of me. He's already preparing to take on the last trial. The hell does he do that, man?!" He exclaimed.

"For all his faults, I am aware that Kyle is a rather talented gamer." Shiro chuckled. He heard the door close, and two Joes walked into the room. Both of them were blond. One was male, his gray and green uniform having various gadgets attached to it. His wild blond hair was kept out of his face by a green headband.

Hi-Tech. Real Name: David P. Lewinski. Birthplace: St. Paul, Minnesota. Affiliation: G.I. Joe. Primary Military Specialty: Armament research and design. Secondary Military Specialty: Telecommunications. Physiology: Altered Human. Powers and Abilities: Ability to mentally communicate with technology.

The other was a tall slim woman, her blonde hair tied up in a bun. She wore a gray uniform herself, but she had on her head a gray garrison cap. Her uniform had a chest emblem of a crow in a red circle, the logo appearing again on her cap.

Vorona. Real Name: Daina L. Janack. Birthplace: Ostrava, Czech Republic. Affiliation: G.I. Joe, (formerly) Oktober Guard. Primary Military Specialty: Sniper. Secondary Military Specialty: Helicopter piloting.

"Hey, guys." The young mutants waved at the Joes.

"Sorry we're late, kids." Hi-Tech smiled at them. He motioned to the device in his hands. "The projector was feeling a bit testy."

Vorona rolled her eyes. "Just because you can 'talk' to machines, doesn't mean they care capable of 'speaking' back."

"Hey, don't mind Vorona, projector." Hi-Tech joked as he placed the device on the table. "She doesn't get you." Alison leaned forward in her seat.

"Shiro, Athena, I know the three of us are originals on this team, but I don't think I'll ever get used to the Joes and their weirdness." The blonde told the other three young mutants matter-of-factly.

"Nothing unusual for me." Shiro answered. "I should tell you some more stories about Big Hero 6 sometime."

"Oh, I love those Big Hero 6 stories, man." Julio grinned.

"Hi-Tech would get along with Baymax..."

"He's the robot, right?"

"Yes." Shiro nodded. "Originally built to be a medical robot, but was modified to be a bodyguard."

"Considering the 'childhood' I had, I'm honestly grateful the Joes are wacky sometimes." Athena admitted, crossing her arms.

"Oh yeah, you were made in a lab to be a weapon." Julio visibly winced.

"Mm-hmm." Athena nodded. "So for me, being around the Joes is...actually rather pleasant."

"Well...that's nice."

"It kind of is." Athena nodded.

"You kids ready to hear the mission?" Hi-Tech asked. The kids nodded. He turned on the projector. It showed an image on the wall. The image was of a map.

"...Topeka?" Shiro blinked in confusion. "The capital of Kansas?"

"...Kansas?" Alison blinked. "What could we possibly need to deal with in Kansas?"

"You'd be surprised what kind of things are out there..." Athena said simply. The view switched to a picture of a building with a certain logo on it.

"Ahhhh, that explains it." Shiro leaned forward and steepled his fingers, his eyes narrowing at the image."

"This is Roxxon's Topeka facility." Vorona explained.

"Roxxon, huh?" Athena smirked, crossing her arms. "This is interesting."

"Roxxon? Wonderful." Julio groaned, throwing his hands up. "Just wonderful."

"If Roxxon is involved, it can't be that good." Alison winced. "Those guys have their fingers in some bad pies."

"According to an informant we have, the Topeka branch has gotten their hands on a device." Hi-Tech explained. "What we have to do is essentially find out what it is, and ultimately what they are up to."

"Did your informant provide any further information on the device?" Shiro asked.

"He did manage to give us some pictures." Hi-Tech answered. "This thing." The next image showed a small gray rod-like device, about a foot long. The rod had green glowing circuit-esque lines around it. The ends of the rod were covered by a pair of shining gray spheres that looked highly polished.

"What is that thing?" Alison asked.

"Looks like something out of Star Trek." Julio smirked.

"We are not sure." Vorona explained. "Our informant wasn't able to give us much information about what it is. He has said that they are trying to see if it can be an energy source."

"An energy source?" Alison blinked.

"Makes sense." Shiro nodded. "Roxxon is an energy-producing company. If they managed to obtain a potential energy source, you can bet they will try to make a profit off of it."

"What does this have to do with us?" Julio asked.

"Well, Roxxon and its subsidaries have had numerous skirmishes with various heroes over the years." Hi-Tech explained. "So, I think we can assume that they may be up to something with this device. But we want to be sure before we move on them."

"True." Vorona agreed with a nod. "If we strike without probable cause, Roxxon can make things much more difficult for other heroes to prevent any of their...shadier business dealings in the future."

Alison raised her hand. "Uh, question. Who is going to lead us? Theresa has gone to the Pit for that Joe wedding."

"Ho hooo, man! I hope she gets us footage and pictures of it!" Rictor grinned.

"If the Joes are involved, you can bet normalcy left a long time ago." Athena rolled her eyes. "Hell, knowing our luck, it'd end up being a marriage between a Joe and a Dreadnok." The other five people in the room started laughing.

"Good one, Claws!" Alison chortled. "A Joe marrying a Dreadnok. That'll be the day."

"You never know, girl. It could happen." Rictor joked.

"Considering the Joes' knack for...attracting chaos, I would not be surprised if that does happen in the future." Shiro said.

"I am glad we are having some fun here, but we have a briefing to finish." Vorona stated. "Now then, our mission is to find out what this device is and determine if their intentions are less than noble. Hi-Tech will be going undercover thanks to our informant providing him employee identification."

"If this is an undercover operation, why do you need us here?" Shiro asked.

"To get my techno-talkin' butt out of trouble if something goes wrong, kid." Hi-Tech explained.

"Your role is strictly backup." Vorona explained.

"Is there even anything to do in Topeka?" Alison asked. Athena pulled out her phone.

"There's the Combat Air Museum, the Kansas Museum of History, and the Topeka Zoo." The clone of Wolverine answered.

"Hey, maybe we can see some old planes there." Rictor suggested.

"The Zoo sounds nice." Alison smiled.

"It has had a bit of a...checkered history." Athena winced as she read her search results about the Topeka Zoo.

Vorona sighed. "This is a mission, not a vacation."

"Maybe we can visit there some other time." Hi-Tech reassured Alison. "Wait, I just remembered, are we still allowed in Topeka? I heard we were banned from there."

"Wait, how can we be banned from Topeka if we've never been there?" Alison asked, scratching her head.

"Not us, Hi-Tech. Flint and Lady Jaye." Vorona explained. "They went to Topeka and got into...a bit of a spat."

"Oh yeah, they settled it with some tanks, didn't they?!" Julio burst out laughing. "Man, that is hilarious!"

"We're just grateful they didn't fire them. They just played bumper cars with them in downtown Topeka." Vorona sighed. "As a result, they're not allowed in Topeka for another year or so."

"Ah, right." Hi-Tech nodded. "I hope those two realize how lucky they are. They should've ended up in jail."

"I'm sure they do." Vorona nodded. "Let's get to work, kids."

Well, well, well! Looks like our heroes are in for a new adventure! What insanity will happen next? What is Roxxon's true goals for the device? Will it cause a disaster? Will I stop asking stupid questions! Find out in the next chapter!

– See rogue-scholar07's fic "Mama Zarana"

- This is an actual Star Trek novel. I own it, and have read it. It's pretty good.