Disclaimer: all characters and respective things such as the T-Virus and David Caruso do not belong to me and I am not getting any money from this. It's all for giggles. So don't sue.

Lab Rats: David Caruso and Grapes…

"Don't you think Wesker looks like David Caruso?"

Steve let out a loud sigh.

They had been sat there in that small, heavily disinfected room with the TV churning out one episode after another of CIS: Miami for the past three hours and were both waiting for their respective tormentors to come and poke them with sharp pointy needles. This happened a lot, so the two often would just sit there, talk and annoy the hell out of each other until said people turned up. However, Sherry would do just about anything to keep occupied, rather than think about the pain they were about to undergo. Hence the inane and extremely stupid questions.

Not that Steve minded, Sherry's unusually childish outbursts were a welcome change to the monotonous beeps and blips of the machines he was constantly wired to or the seriously socially inept scientists he encountered every single day. They were cold, distant and possessed no sense of humour what so ever. Sherry on the other hand could make him smile by just being there. Whether she just sat there with him, said a kind word, held his greenish mutated hand in hers or did something completely and utterly stupid.

Although sometimes she did go a bit too far; like the time she had eaten a whole bag of jelly babies, for a bet, before one of her check ups. She had gotten so high on sugar she had practically bounced off the walls and whilst as funny as it was to watch a fifteen year old girl giggle insanely as two burly members of security tried to catch her, he had gotten a severe reprimand from Wesker.

Still their TV marathons made him feel normal, human even, which considering how he looked was a fucking miracle to say the least, even if she did bug the hell out of him from time to time.

"Okay I think whatever they've been doing to you have finally done something to that pea sized brain of yours." He finally stated and happily guzzled a few grapes Sherry had brought him.

Sherry rolled her eyes and ignored him.

"No really, when he does that lone wolf thing at the end or just stands there glaring at someone with his sunglasses on…" she pointed to the television screen as the actor on screen did exactly that. "See! Right there, now tell me that isn't my uncle!"

Steve cocked his head at the screen and squinted. Not that he had much problem with his eyesight since the incident with Alexia and her transvestite brother, but just he thought his smaller companion was mad. Bat shit insane really. However she was right and as much as he hated to admit it there was a shocking resemblance to their guardian.

"Oh yeah, I kinda see it."

The blonde sitting on the bed giggled in triumph and helped her self to another sip of Steve's water. She liked being right even if she was just being silly. And she was right, to her the man on the screen could've very well have been her Uncle. In fact…

"Hey, maybe he IS my uncle!" She laughed excitedly.

Steve bit back a groan. Yup, Sherry was in one of those strange moods again, but he would play along with her. He always did.

"Okay, now you've lost me. Why… I mean how?"

The blonde stared at the screen and popped a grape into her mouth, chewed it thoughtfully.

"Well, I mean other than being a generally bad tempered, grumpy old bastard who likes to stick you with needles, he has to do something with his spare time right? He can't be always working."

Another sigh and another urge to strangle the younger girl.

"You scare me, you know that right?" Steve said bluntly and then added. "Besides Caruso is Ginger."

"So?"

"Wesker ain't Ginger."

"Well… he could be."

"Yeah?"

She bit her lip and popped yet another one of the grapes into her mouth.

"Well he could, like, dye his hair or something…?" She shrugged casually.

The elder boy snorted and let out a loud laugh, making the hospital bed they were seated on wobble unsteadily. Sherry on the other hand just frowned and huffed.

"You know, you really are an idiot."

A blonde eyebrow twitched as the young Birkin glared.

" At least I don't get mistaken for Kermitt the frog."

Steve stopped laughing and shot the blonde a dirty look. He tried to use those red eyes of his to menacing effect, but failed miserably and his dirty looked turned into more of a moody teenage pout.

"Hey, I so totally do not look like Kermitt the fucking frog okay?" Pouted childishly and crossed his arms in a mock sulk. "Incredible Hulk maybe…"

"More like She-Hulk…" Sherry coughed.

"What was that?" He growled, which sounded like a growl should sound. Never say being a mutated freak didn't have an upside.

"Nothing!" she smiled sweetly, not scarred in the least.

"No, what was that?" He pressed.

"Nothing!" She cried on the verge of a severe giggle fit.

He sighed deeply and flopped back onto the bed, annoyed.

"I don't know why I put up with you…"

"Because you love me really." She grinned.

"Yeah like a hole in the head." He sighed, but he still felt his lip's quirk up into a smile despite himself.

The young Birkin just grinned wickedly as she Steve settled back on the bed and tried to watch the god-awful television show. Why did they never wear those creepy white overalls that most CSI agents wore?

However before the boy could ponder on the lack of professionalism shown in the show a grape hit him squarely in the face.

"OW!" he cried and growled at his smaller companion. "Dude, what the fuck?"

Sherry just sat on the bed and did her best to look sweet and innocent.

"Me?"

"Yeah you!"

"Wasn't me."

Another growl and another moody flop onto the bed, with few extra mumbles directed towards a certain small blonde. However within another 30 seconds another grape had made it's way into his eye.

"OW! FUCK!" He snarled. "Okay that's it you're so fucking dead!"

And with that a slightly green Steve Burnside put his super human speed to good use and pounced upon the young Birkin and began to exact his revenge… by tickling her to death. Soon the room was filled with the screams, wails and uncontrollable laughter of both the victim and her attacker, it turned out Sherry wasn't the only one who was ticklish. Grapes were scattered to the floor and the long television forgotten. However the noise was such it caused a great deal of interest including…

"What is the meaning of this?" A cold voice barked from the doorway of their little room.

Both stopped dead and in a very compromising position. Steve had pinned the young girl to the bed with his legs with a hand on her side and another on her neck, whilst Sherry had twisted an arm around the green boys neck and another under one of his armpits. Wesker just stared in his usual blank way with the exception of one fine blond eyebrow that had shot up at the sight he had just witnessed. After about a minute they jumped apart to sit on the opposite ends of the bed, both sporting matching blushes.

"Nothing." They mumbled in unison.

"Indeed" Wesker replied and took off his glasses.

Shit! They thought in unison. Wesker only took his shades off if someone had really annoyed him. Soon those red eyes surrounded by gold were on display and Sherry's uncle made no attempt to hide his irritation at their actions and glared.

"And if I catch either of you doing 'nothing' again there shall be far more than hell to pay, do I make myself quite clear?" He growled. This time Sherry felt a little shiver of fear up her spine. Her uncle could be very scary at times.

"Yes sir."

"Good."

With that the man carefully place his sunglasses back were they belonged and stood in the door way a little longer than nessercary. At that moment a single thought ran between the two and both had to bite their lips to keep from laughing out loud. He looks just like… However as Wesker stalked off to do whatever Wesker did it all became too much and both of them had to let it out and once again the facility was filled with the sound of juvenile laughter.

Wesker just sighed heavily.

"I'm surrounded by idiots…"

End.