Denmark had known for quite some time that Norway was actually a girl. See, after Sweden and Finland left, he decided that he was too lonely to sleep in his own bed- alone.

So, naturally, he went into Norway's room to wake him up and get Norge to sleep with him- no, not that way, you perverts!-, only to find that Norway was a her… Needless to say, that night ended in Denmark nursing a particularly nasty bruise on his face, while Norway took a long, hot bath to get the feeling of Denmark's hands off her (Hey, how was he supposed to know if they were real or not if he didn't grope them?).

But that is a story for another time. This particular tale deals with yet another- possibly the worst so far- of Denmark's moments of pure stupidity.

It was time for another world meeting. Things were happening as usual; Prussia had his hand under the table, and was doing something that made America's brother- what was his name again?- turn an interesting shade of red. America himself was arguing with England about hamburgers, or some other stupid food. Spain was chattering to a livid Romano, and North Italy was clinging onto the arm of a certain German that was trying (unsuccessfully) to restore order. Although he was unsuccessful (no nation at all was paying attention, they were all involved in one of three activities. One: a fistfight. Two: a verbal fight. Three: teasing, fighting with, or having a good time with their lover), one had to give him credit for trying (and failing).

And, of course, Denmark decided that he had to be a total idiot, and ruin the secret that Norway had managed to keep to herself for a few hundred years (although, the fact that he didn't know he was the only one that knew (yes, he was that oblivious) has to be taken into consideration).

"Hey Norge! Norge! Norgie Norgie Norgie!" He punctuated each word with a poke to the side of Norway's torso, barely missing her chest- bound and covered by a slightly baggy uniform and a shirt under the uniform- and growing more and more irked when Norway studiously ignored him. "You know Norge, it's pretty un-awesome to ignore people when they're trying to talk to people. Especially cool people like me. Hello? Norge? Are you even listening? If you don't listen to me, I'll pull a France!"

Norway breathed in and out calmly, not listening to Denmark and repeating her mantra in her head- ignore the dumbass, ignore the dumbass, ignore the dumbass- until Denmark did something completely unexpected. Well, maybe not unexpected (the man was a huge pervert, after all), but something he definitely should have known not to do. He laid an arm across her shoulders, smiling inwardly when she didn't notice. Wow, Norge was really out of it sometimes. Well, anyways, onto his totally awesome plan to get Norgie to loosen up a bit! It was because of those really tight bandage thingies she wrapped her chest with…

Denmark smirked, and used the switchblade he had clasped between two of his fingers to quickly slit the part of the bandage that wrapped over her shoulder and held the disguise together.

"MATHIAS!" Norway shrieked- hitting a pitch that most men would not be able to reach, even if they had been on the receiving end of Hungary's frying pan- when aimed directly at their vital regions-, immediately quieting most of the nations in the room. Her face slowly turned crimson; the bandages were pretty much useless, and her uniform was now… Much more filled out.

"Ahh, so Norway is a girl!" France inched closer, grinning like the perverted creeper he was. And positively ecstatic at the thought of a new nation to screw with- ahem, share the wonders of l'amour with. "Wonderful~"

"Wait… So… the others didn't know?" Denmark asked, tilting his head, realization dawning across his face. "Oh… shit…"

Norway could feel the tears building behind her eyes, and ok, maybe she liked being viewed as a man, but she was sure she was going to tell everyone her real gender eventually, just not today, and oh why couldn't Denmark keep his stupid fucking mouth shut, and everyone was staring, this was oh so mortifying and-

"Danemark, are you opposed to me spending some time with your lovely friend tonight? I promise I'll give her back~"

France's remark clinched it; this was why she hid her gender! She didn't want to be treated like an object! Norway couldn't take it anymore, jumping out of her chair and sprinting to the bathroom, missing the forceful right hook of Denmark's that collided with France's face.

"Wait! Halldora!" Denmark yelled as he chased Norway; using the feminine form of her name, her real name, was a sure sign he had something important to say. But Norway didn't want to hear it. She realized that Denmark was gaining on her, and turned abruptly into the nearest hall closet, closing and locking the door behind her.

She could hear Denmark outside; whining about how he'd kept so many of her other secrets, and she hissed in the dark that the secrets he kept were no excuse for the ones he didn't. Wait… Why was it dark? Norway reached to flick the light switch, not wanting to be stuck in a closet she didn't know the contents of.

Only after she had turned on the light did she realize exactly which closet she had been unfortunate enough to choose…

Condoms littered the floor, along with discarded bottles of lubricant and there were stains on the carpet that didn't even bear thinking about-

With a small shriek, she shoved the door open and tripped- right into that stupid, idiotic, asshole of a Dane's arms.

"Halldora!" He wrapped Norway in a hug, tightening his grip when she tried to struggle so she could get away. "No. You can't leave, Hallie, not before I've said what I need to say." There was an oddly serious tone to his voice as Norway buried her face in his shirt, hoping it would soak up the tears that were falling.

"Fine," she muttered, trying to get her voice back to its normal, emotionless tone. Emotions were bad, they gave too much away, they were too feminine.

"I'm sorry." Denmark rested his chin on the top of Norway's head, realizing how soft her hair really was. "I'm really, really sorry. I thought everyone already knew you were a girl, and I… I really fucked up this time, didn't I."

"…" Norway wasn't answering, even knowing that this was the closest to an apology she would probably get from the egotistic nation. She just wanted Denmark to finish talking already, so she could go home and preferably not talk to anyone for the next few weeks.

"Please, Halldora, say you forgive me." Denmark's voice was remorseful, and Norway knew that if she looked up, she'd see him making those ridiculous puppy dog eyes and pouting like a child. "Hallie?" Denmark frowned for a brief second, debating how to get her to answer him. "I'm going to tickle you if you don't answer me!" He didn't even give Norway a chance to tell him that Yes, he was a dumbass, and Maybe he should just go fall into a ravine, or even a Fine, I accept your idiotic apology. Instead, he moved his hands from around her back to her sides, and started tickling her like they were kids again and he was trying to see what her laugh sounded like (also a story for another time).

"M-Mathias, stop tickling me," Norway managed to not laugh, even though the effort she put into stopping that simple reaction was astounding. "I mean it! Mathias!"

"Nope, not until you say you forgive me!" Denmark grinned until she kicked him in the leg and unbalanced him; only remembering at the last second to throw his hands out to stop the fall so he didn't crush Norge.

Norway's blush was returning, now that she realized the situation they were in. She was lying on the floor, Denmark practically straddling her. She tried remaining silent again, willing her red face to fade.

"… You know, you're really cute," Denmark looked at Norway with something different in his eyes- something she'd seen once before when he found out that she was a girl. He leaned down, taking advantage of the shell-shocked Norway to plant a soft kiss on her lips. "Do you forgive me?" He mumbled against her mouth, not really caring if anyone was watching (Japan may or may not have been hiding around a corner, capturing the adorable scene on video).

"… For what?" Norway blinked, then kept her eyes closed. It was easier to deal with the annoying blonde when you couldn't see him.

"For me sharing your secret." Denmark felt a funny sensation in his stomach when Norway asked him about what she should forgive; that had to mean the kiss or the gender revealing! So she had to have liked the kiss, if she was acknowledging it and not pretending it never happened!

"… Fine. I'll forgive you if you get off me. Stupid, annoying, irritating obnoxious-" Norway had started berating him under her breath when he didn't immediately get up, until Denmark silenced her with another kiss, this time with tongue.

"… You liked it. Admit it. You liked it." He grinned when he finally pulled away, leaving Norway flushed and looking oh so deliciously- whoa. Not good thoughts to be having at a world meeting.

"…" Norway didn't respond again, her already muddled brain losing more and more ability to think clearly as she tried to process what just happened. Where had things gone wrong? She tried thinking through the events of the morning slowly; wondering why the hell she was sprawled in a hallway with Denmark on top of her- and, more importantly, why the hell she liked it.

One: the secret was revealed

Two: she'd run away

Three: Denmark followed

Four: The closet was… just… eww

Five: he wouldn't let her go

Six: he kissed her…

Ahh… So that's where it started going down hill-

"Norge? You love me, right? You're not mad that I kissed you or anything?" Denmark brushed her nose with his own, trying to get her to focus on him. Which was very, very hard, seeing as he was still pressed up against her. Norway turned her head away, her face returning to a deep red.

"… Fine." She sighed, tilted her head up, and hesitantly pressed her lips to Denmark's. "I love you. But you need to learn to keep secrets better." And she was only doing it to shut the idiotic Dane up, not because she actually liked him or something!

…

And why, for the sake of all things supernatural, was Japan snapping pictures?

Authoress' Random Ramble

YAY MY VERY FIRST DENNOR FIC. There totally needs to be more DenNor in the APH fandom.

I borrowed Norway's name from La Mademoiselle (check out her profile, she writes so much awesome DenNor~~)

And… yeah… I might do a semi-related sequel to this, or expand upon the events mentioned if this fic is well-received.

Less than three. Less than three.