Disclaimer: I don't own the X-Men.
Marie
It's been four years since any hand has touched me and now I'm obsessed. Bobby, dear Bobby, he wanted to go slow, one step at a time. He wanted to hold my hand, and God, it was heaven. But I wanted more – and he was afraid. Afraid of what, I don't know. He pushed me away. I was so mad, so angry. He didn't understand.
I needed him to touch me.
I strode through the house, no thought to where I was going, when I saw a familiar face. The door to the gym was open. Colossus was lifting weights. He was so beautiful, his skin glistening with sweat. I remember when he touched me in the Danger Room. He saved me and I hurt him – this man who could crush the life out of me with one hand. I wanted to apologize. I wanted to touch him, to show him it wouldn't hurt anymore. That's what I did. I walked right up to him and put my hand on his back. He turned to see who it was and his eyes widened in surprise. My hand was on him and it didn't hurt. He smiled. He laughed. I couldn't stop myself. I ran my hand over his shoulder, across his chest and stomach. I needed to touch him - but he stopped me. He took my hands in his and held them tight. So tight! He said I had to stop. He said he was my friend. I asked him to touch me. I begged him please. He shook his head. He was afraid of me again, like he'd been in the Danger Room. Only now I couldn't hurt him. But he was still afraid.
I left the room crying. All this time I couldn't touch them. Now I can, and they push me away.
I have to get out, go somewhere, find someone who won't push me away. I'm almost at the door when I hear Logan's voice.
'Hey kid. Where are you going now?'
I turn and Logan frowns at the sight of my tear-streaked face.
'What's wrong?' he asks.
I want to tell him, but I can't. He takes a step closer. I want him to stay away. I don't want to touch him only to have him pull away.
'I have to go. I have to get out of here,' I say.
'What's wrong?'
I shake my head and make for the door but find I can't move. He has my arm. He won't let me go.
'Marie?' There is concern in his eyes.
Tears flood mine and I can't see. I break. I cry. He pulls me into his arms – strong, powerful arms.
'No one will touch me,' I sob. 'I need someone to touch me.'
He pats my back and holds me, but says nothing. When the tears are gone I pull away. I have to leave. I have to find someone – but Logan won't let go of my arm.
'Let go,' I growl.
'You're not going out like this,' he replies.
I meet Logan's eyes. He's afraid, like the others. He knows what I want. He knows I'll find it out there. Someone out there will touch me, someone who won't push me away. He knows - and he's afraid.
I try to pull my arm free. I hit him and he grabs my fist. I scream but he ignores my cries and drags me to my room like a petulant child. He pushes me through the door and slams it shut behind us. I turn on him. I'm ready to fight my way free. I swing at him wildly and he grabs my hands to stop me. I'm pinned again with my back against his chest. My arms won't budge and I'm crying.
'Marie,' he says quietly, his breath warm on my neck. 'I can't let you go like this.'
His voice trembles, but his hand drops to my waist and his fingers touch the skin where my jeans and silk shirt meet. His hand rests on my stomach and I go still. He's touching me and I stop fighting. He turns me around to face him, his hand never breaking contact with my skin. I look into his eyes. He's afraid.
'Please Logan,' I say.
A war rages within him. He doesn't want to touch me, but he knows if he doesn't I'll find someone else who will. He doesn't want that. I know it. I understand him better than anyone else could. He's a part of me. He'll always be there inside my mind.
He pulls a scarf off the door. 'Close your eyes,' he says and I obey.
He ties the scarf gently around my eyes to cover them. He leads me to the bed and lays me down. He touches me. He touches me. He touches me.
It feels like heaven.
I reach out to touch him but he takes my hand. 'No,' he says. His voice is firm. He won't allow it.
I understand. It's too much to ask, even from him. He loves me, though, that's why he touches me. It hurts him, too. It hurts even more than when I drained the life from his body, but still he touches me – his Marie.
A/N: Although this fic is for Rowena DeVandal's 1,000 word challenge - let it be made clear that she in no way supports Rogan :)