Title: The Cheerful Fairy
A/N: Well, like the complete dork that I am, I was listening to Hogfather on CD. Again. And the Cheerful Fairy just sort of stuck in my head. Then this happened. Please, read and review!
Cameron liked the Cheerful Fairy. She'd been the first to meet her: Chase and Foreman didn't seem able to see her, and luckily House hadn't arrived at work yet when she appeared.
It hadn't taken her long to realize that she and the Cheerful Fairy (whose name was Mrs. Smith) had a lot in common. They both held the general view that most of life's problems could be solved with a cheerful smile, and that the best thing to do when life handed you lemons was to make lemonade (1). They also had the same basic goal— to make House happy.
It was there, too, that they differed. Cameron had the advantage of knowing that if House could be cheered up, it wouldn't be by playing party games, or maybe having a sing-a-long.
Cameron felt sorry for Mrs. Smith. It was easy to feel sorry for her. It was probably the tendency she had, when everyone wasn't being cheerful, to burst into tears. The seemingly endless supply of handkerchiefs up her sleeves was also a factor. Speaking of tears, her first encounter with House ended (as Cameron's nearly had) in tears.
"Who's this?" House asked Cameron. Foreman and Chase were thankfully out of the room, which saved some awkward questions (2).
"I'm the Cheerful Fairy!" replied Mrs. Smith, though it didn't sound as if she were putting her whole heart into it. Perhaps, on seeing him, she'd realized the magnitude of her task.
"Cameron?"
"She is the Cheerful Fairy. I've had a demonstration." This was true. The Cheerful Fairy had conjured board games out of thin air.
"Oh, really. Well, what's that on your shoulder, cheerful fairy?"
"The bluebird of happiness?"
"Looks more like the chicken of depression to me." The conversation went downhill from there, and ended with House suggesting a visit to the psych ward, and the aforementioned bursting into tears.
Cameron thought about all this while eating lunch. She was surreptitiously (3) watching House and Wilson eat. They were both laughing. Cameron supposed he'd told Wilson about the Cheerful Fairy.
Privately, Cameron knew that Wilson's cheering up House didn't really count. It involved too much beer, for one thing. But somehow, she didn't think the Cheerful Fairy would see it that way. All that mattered to her job was that House was happy. (And no one ever thought of Cameron, did they? It was time to start making lemonade again. Nasty, sour, bitter lemonade.)
When the Cheerful Fairy saw what House was like with Wilson, she'd leave. After all, thought Cameron, even I can realize when I'm beaten.
(1)This is not, in fact, true. You can only make lemonade if life gives you sugar and water too. The only thing you'll get out of lemons by themselves is lemon juice, which isn't much fun to drink.
(2)More awkward, anyway.
(3)That is, she was trying to be surreptitious. And failing.