Title: Playing Along
Rated: T
Genres: Romance, Humour
Summary: When Inuyasha tells his young new girlfriend that he is a divorced family man to cover up the scam he uses to pick up girls, Kagome is in for a real surprise when he asks her and her children to play his ex-wife and kids
Hey this is my new and first ever Inuyasha fanfiction, it's going to be based a bit on "Just Go With it" You know that film with, Jennifer Anniston, Adam Sandler? Anyway before you start, Whura is a mixture of Whore and Yura so pronounced Hura yeah. Feel free to point out any mistakes you see to me. Flame is you really want to, you know I feed off of flames since they point out the mistakes your story has in a blunt way and I like that, it helps me improve.
Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha, Characters you recognise or any scenes you recognise from "Inuyasha" "Just go with it" or any other anime you've seen, scenes from some Animes may be or are purely coincidental and belong to their rightful owners.
So right now I'm slow dancing with my beautiful albeit a little tipsy wife Kagome at my wedding. Thinking about how this all started. Well lets go back to my first almost wedding. Where I came up with this amazing back story to score hit chicks, at my wedding? Read and you'll get what I mean. I was supposed to get married a bitch named Kinkyho and her bridesmaids from hell Slagura, Whura and Kalbino, well their real names were Kikyo, Kagura, Yura and Kanna but that's beside the point.
Anyways, I was 18 and in love fresh out of highschool, when an interesting conversation brought me from the altar to the room of my 'lovely' bride to be, Kikyo.
"I'm so happy you picked this dress, Kikyo!" Slagura smiled.
"Yeah…You look beautiful." That pale Kalbino had chimed in solemnly.
"Doesn't she?" Slagura said dreamily
"You guys, I'm getting married! I'm getting married!" Kinkyho giggled girlishly
"Not without your veil, you're not silly. It's tradition!" Rin exclaimed "Ugh. Now Where is it?"
"Oh, I think I left it upstairs." Kinkyho feigned fake innocence which Rin would've seen through if she wasn't so excited
"Don't worry. I'll get it," Rin paused "Sis" She grinned, rushing up the stairs to retrieve the missing veil. That was Rin for ya, helpful and hyper. Seven though she had been nice on that day she had still warned me about that bitch Kikyo
"She is so annoying." That two faced whore Kinkyho had said after Rin left.
"Isn't she? And so ugly." Slagura complained laughing.
"She looks like an eight year old, and don't get me started on her figure, it's virtually non-existent" Yura added, The slut probably just loved slaggine people off behind her backs, no-one talks about Rin like that and I'll have you know I ripped her a new one after embarrassing Kikyo at the altar
"I know! and she's gonna be my sister-in-law in an hour!" Kinkyho sighed applying more make up to her ugly face, making it even more grotesque
Kalbino was silent during the whole exchange, I still wonder why
"How are you gonna deal with that?" Yura asked
"I'm just gonna lay down the law for my little Yashie-poo." She smirked "We're seeing that weird demon family of his as little as possible." God how had I thought I was in love with that thing, most embarrassing thing ever like ew
"You sure he's gonna go along with that?" Kagura asked admiring herself in the mirror, what a self centred hoe.
"Inuyasha doesn't say no to me. Believe me, I've had well trained since middle school."
"So, tell us, what happened with Naraku last night?" Yura asked eagerly while Kalbino and Slagura probably inwardly groaned. Naraku was their creepy cousin that had some weird infatuation with Kikyo since forever, still can't believe I didn't see she was cheating on me with that greasy bastard.
"So, I told him if he wanted to stop the wedding, he had to speak now or forever hold his peace." Kikyo started annoyed "And guess what that creepy bastard said?"
"'I'm never gonna settle down Kikyo. You can marry that half-breed of yours knowing you could've had a real Demon' But God as he said it, he was so hot! I melted right there and then" Kikyo said fanning herself. Words can't describe how disgusting that was
"So did he give you a wedding present, huh?" Whura asked, I swear she was some kind of sex freak, and not the good kind either
"Jesus Yura! You're so horny!" Slagura teased
"Yeah. He did. I guess you could call it that anyway." I don't think she felt remorseful
"You're so bad!" Whura laughed, and it was so ugly my ears had drooped at the time and they still do!
"It's the last time, I swear." Kinkyho had said no sincerity in her voice what so ever
"Yeah, right!" Slagura grinned.
"But Inuyasha is so cute and protective, And he's gonna be an archaeologist. So, I'm marrying him and those weird cosplay doggy thingies on his head. Maybe I could get him to turn human for me? He'd look better. I'm dreading tonight, I bet you he won't be as good as Naraku. Or all my other secret lovers!" Kinkyho exclaimed as she literally cackled.
"Close your eyes when he's on top!" Whura laughed she was on the floor where trash lik her belonged
"And your thighs, don't worry faking an orgasm won't be that hard guys, he's so much of a virgin he probably doesn't know what one is!" The whole group had fallen about laughing, well except for Kalbino who was void of emotion and my own sister in law Rin who was busy upstairs.
You know at first, from the altar. I had thought my almighty "Cosplay doggy thingies" as Kinkyho had put it had been deceiving me, Kikyo had, had her bad points but to cheat on me? My anger had long since faded and I had given a bitter sweet smile. I guess I had expected that from a two cent whore like her, well deep down anyway. I'd turned around to face Miroku, my best man.
"Inuyasha, I'm so sorry." He had said
Can't say it was the best night of my life, more like embarrassing. But basically that was me, Inuyasha Takahashi at 18. Pathetic, huh?
So, I was halfway done boozing away my sorrows, when something pretty interesting happened. This really stunning bombshell works in pissed and gorgeous and loads of lecherous comments being thrown at her by sleazy guys, you know the usual
"Oh, baby, you're like a Pop Tart, hot and sweet!"
"Hey, mami!"
"You must play the trumpet or something,
'cause you're making me feel all horny and stuff!" That one didn't even make much sense to me. The lady sat next to me at the bar, and I noticed she had dropped her purse
"You dropped your purse." I had said to her
"Can I just sit for 10 seconds and not get hit on? Thank you." Did this lady even listen
"I was just letting you know you dropped your purse." I kind of snapped at her.
"I'm sorry. I thought..." She said her blue eyes glancing at my ring. Which I for some reason had kept on
"That's fine, that's fine." Remembering why I was her as her eyes lingered on my ring
"I'm sure you didn't meet the lady who gave you that ring in a dodgy market like this." She giggled, hm she had been cute.
"School cafeteria." I told her
"How long you been married?" She'd asked me
I was gonna tell her, I really was. But I didn't want her to know what a loser I was, so I stretched the truth a little.
"Six years." She'd nodded at my response so I'd guessed that she'd bought it.
"Where's your wife tonight?" The girl had asked
"I stopped asking that question a long time ago." I responded putting as much hurt and upset in my voice as I could, which wasn't hard considering what had gone down that night
"Aw. That's terrible." She said to me sympathy lacing her voice.
"My wife says I work too much." I started "Trying to provide for her, her shopping addiction," I paused a little as if contemplating whether to tell her this secret or not, it was a small pause though, the girl was a little tipsy at this point so she wouldn't have thought much of it anyways "and crack." I added. The words I had said weren't too convincing but my tone of voice had been.
"Why don't you just leave her?" The girl asked
"The children." I said "My poor children. All 14 of them." I added making sure to have my voice crack.
"I just, I like to adopt," I said "and I don't wanna stop doing that." I knew then that I totally had gift for this.
"You poor guy. You wanna get outta here?" She had smiled and grabbed my hand flirtatiously So I discovered the power of the wedding ring. The symbol of my humiliation had become a tool to get back on the horse.
I switched my specialty from archaeology to plastic surgery, and the ring became my thing.
Lets flash forward 18 years and into another bar, with some other hopeless girl that would fall for my act.
"I just assumed after we got married she'd stop hooking, but..." I looked her in the eye. Bingo! I was sooo getting laid tonight. The girl took my hand and placed it on her chest, how forward I mused.
"You need to put this wedding band on a true heart." She said. Corny I know but she was hot.
"This is a good moment." I said, winning quote guys, take note of this, and ladies stop calling me a pig already.
"Yeah. Should we go make it last, for a while, somewhere?" She proposed breathless
"Okay, let's go. To your dorm." I agreed
Sometimes I think about throwing the ring into the ocean. I know how wrong it is, using it like this I mean. But I can't. I can never throw this baby away. It's my Precious. Besides, being fake married is the perfect way to make sure I never get my heart broken again.
A/N: That's the first chapter done! I don't have much to say apart from review! And sorry I haven't updated my other stories, I can't update if you kill me so put down your weapons please!
Yours,
Blossom