**ANYTHING YOU RECOGNIZE BELONGS TO MARVEL**I OWN NONE OF THIS**

~STEVE POV~

Tony and I entered the shared kitchen at Avengers Tower to grab more glasses and alcohol for the roof party.

"I still think that was a little far, Tony. You don't say things like that to women." I told him

"Do me a favor, Cap and grab some of the glasses out of the cabinet over there." He replied completely ignoring what I said.

"Telling her that finding a nice guy and settling down is going to straighten her out is bad enough. But telling her that she'll never find a nice guy, so she might as well sleep with you is so much worse." I said, not moving.

"Glasses." Tony said, pointing to a bank of cabinets off to the left.

I opened the first one only to find Natasha curled up inside. I looked at her, not too surprised she'd been able to fit in there, and then back at Tony. He was bent over in the refrigerator, mumbling to himself. I looked back at Natasha. "Trying to get back at Tony?" I whispered. She gave a slight nod, and I softly closed the cabinet. I looked through three more cabinets before Tony realized I still had no glasses.

"What are you doing? They're right in the first cabinet." Tony huffed

"I guess I just have old man vision, I can't find them. Come find them with your young eyes." I told him, stepping out of the line of fire, since I wasn't sure what Natasha was going to do.

"Look with your special eyes!" He exclaimed looking at me expectantly.

I gave him a blank stare. He deflated and said, "Never mind, something else you missed, Capsicle."

He came over and dramatically threw open the door to the cabinet Natasha was hiding in.

"My bra-AHHHHHH!" He screamed like a little girl as he saw her.

This time she did surprise me. Somehow, she had a glass full of water or, more likely, vodka, and she had pulled a gun from God-knows-where. She pulled the trigger. Tony stepped back clutching his chest, and promptly fell to the floor.

"You had to shoot him?" I asked

"Blanks." She said nonchalantly, waving her gun a little.

I chuckled and looked at Natasha. "Do I even want to ask where all that came from?"

She just smirked at me and said "Girl's gotta have her secrets, Rogers."

Tony started to stir, and I asked "Can I see that gun?"

She tossed it to me and I promptly pointed it at Tony. He opened his eyes to see Captain America pointing a gun at him. He whimpered and curled up in a ball.

"Don't be a jerk to women any more, Stark." I told him

"Oh my god, Tony. You wet yourself!" Natasha exclaimed, wrinkling her nose in disgust.

"Who wet themselves, now?" Bruce asked as he strolled in. He looked down at Tony on the ground, up to me standing over him pointing a gun, and finally to Natasha who was still in the cabinet.

"You guys were taking a while, so I came to see if I could help, but," He threw up his hands in surrender, "I don't want any part of whatever this is." He slowly walked backwards out of the room as Tony started to beg Bruce to not leave us alone with him.

"You need a hand getting out of there?" I asked Natasha

She shook her head and popped out of the cabinet like a cork out of champagne. She gracefully landed, and strode out of the room.

"Need my gun back, Rogers" She called back to me.

"Blanks, Stark. It's just full of blanks." I told him