"Who in their right mind would call me at this un-godly hour?" Lorelai
grumbled."Hello?"
That was how Rory told the story, waking up to her mother's
frantic cries.
"Rory! Oh god, RORY!" her hysterical tears, the stampeding
of her feet as she raced down the staircase,"RORY!"
"Mom?" the teenager rubbed her eyes
Tears streamed down Lorelai's face as she shakingly attempted to throw a
coat over her pajamas."Oh no, oh god"
"Mom?"
"Your grandpa...he's"
"MOM!" her voice was frantic,"You can't just wake me up and .." a sick
pressure built up in her chest, making Rory wish she could scream.
"We need to get to the hospital" was all Lorelai could say.
***********************************
Making my way downtown
Walking fast
************************************
Luke concentrated on the screeching of the tires that passed
his apartment window."Lorelai's" he muttered
"What?" Jess called
"Nothin'" Luke answered, his eyes wide open,"It's nothin'"
***********************************
Faces passed
And I'm home bound
***********************************
They ran down a long poorily lit corridor, hearts racing
That was how Rory told the story. Feeling that pit in her stomach when
she realized why they were there. And no laughter could make
this go away.
"Grandma!" Rory yelled, racing behind her mother
A doctor pulled Lorelai aside and whispered.Rory watched her mother
fall into a chair, holding her face in her hands.
Rory watched her grandmother take her grandfather's hand, tears
racing down the old woman's cheeks.
Behind her, the doctor kneeled down in front of Lorelai,patting her
back akwardly as she cried.Loud hysterical tears.
*************************************
Staring blankly ahead
Just making my way
Making my way
Through the crowd
**************************************
There's something to be said for schedule. Wake up, wake Jess up, get dressed.
Luke had his daily ritual. Baseball hat, look around, leave apartment. Get to
diner.
Everything had a place, a place for everything. She'd come in at 6. Then
at 9.
He looked up at the clock, down at the door.
"Luke?" Sookie stood in the door of the diner, her eyes
blood shot and red.
"Sookie?" he ran out to the door.Luke stopped."Sookie?"
She stood in the doorway, Luke's figure shadowed by the sun.
"Tell Jess.."
She nodded
"I'll be.."
"Just go Luke" Sookie's voice was quiet,"She needs you"
*********************************
And I need you
*********************************
They sat side by side.Each silently , occasionally sniffling, or quietly
crying into their hands.
He's dead. He's dead.
The nurses came occasionally. They touched Rory's shoulder and muttered
something.
We're sorry of your loss.
"Let me talk to your mom" Christopher's voice broke up the silence
between father and daughter over the phone.
Rory handed Lorelai the phone. Closing her mother's fingers around the object.
Lorelai nodded, her eyes shiny and wet."No, I know. She knew " she'd repeat
quietly.
Like Rory couldn't hear.
**********************************
And I miss you
And now I wonder....
***********************************
Someone pressed a small black phone book into Rory's hand and walked away.
She made phone call after phone call. She looked up at the clock, bought
coffee,which sat at her mother and grandmother's side untouched, and
made more phone calls.
The more phone calls, the more people who came.
They came in suits, smelling musty and clean, like they'd hidden in a library,
just like her grandfather. They crowded,fake smiliy, on their way to work.
Rory stood behind her mother's chair, watching her grandmother get passed from
person to person.
Into stranger's arms who held her and said the same things as she cried
"We're so sorry. He was a good man"
They nodded towards Lorelai. And then the room was quiet again.
"Hey" a hand touched Rory's shoulder,reaching over her and taking the
phone from her."I hate these things.Have you eaten?"
"I'm fine Luke" his eyes were so gentle then. Rory winced at the sound of
her tired, worn voice.
"You need a break" he followed her eyes. She was watching Lorelai and
Emily."They'll keep"
"L..Luke?" Lorelai's voice sounded like sobs when she spoke,"Is that you?"
Luke turned his head, an eye on Rory,"Have you eaten?"
The woman ran into his arms, crying into his chest. Luke patted her back
akwardly."It'll be alright" he said quietly,"I promise"
****************************************
If I could fall
Into the sky
Do you think time
Would pass me by
*****************************************
Rory called the funeral home. She called the florist. Jaw clenched
she went through her grandfather's suits, looking for the right one.
She fell back into his oversized chair, shaking.
Too much to do, too little time to cry.
****************************************
'Cause you know I'd walk
A thousand miles
If I could
Just see you
Tonight
****************************************
Her mother wouldn't touch food. Luke came by everyday. Dean lurked in
the shadows.
"I can't!" Lorelai screamed,"I JUST CAN'T!! How do you expect me to FUNCTION
when my father's been dead for 2 days??"
Rory stepped back, jaw clenched.
"It's alright" Luke replied, heading up the stairs after Lorelai,"She
didn't mean it"
Rory just nodded.
***************************************
It's always times like these
When I think of you
***************************************
She saw Dean once.He stood at the front door, clutching flowers,
muttering something.
I'm sorry about your grandfather.
Rory had no time. No time for sleep,no time for food. The car radio
irritated her. Smiling people bugged her.
Deep deep down inside, she held onto a scream.Scream and tears.
*************************************
And I wonder
If you ever
Think of me
***************************************
"Have you eaten,Rory?" Emily's voice was fragile. She finally sounded old
and tired."You look horrible.Your grandfather would be worried"
"I'm fine Grandma" she answered, avoiding her grandmother's eyes."The
car's coming at noon, the service is at one, and your outfit is at the
cleaners.Did I miss anything?"
Emily Gilmore shook her head."He was so proud of you, Rory"
Rory walked out of the room.Three days was too soon. Too soon for the
praise she never heard herself come out of her grandfather's mouth.
It was too soon.
***********************************
'Cause everything's so wrong
And I don't belong
Living in your
Precious memories
************************************
She could count how many times she had seen the sun rise and fall each day.
Count the days on her fingers. She stayed up all night rubbing her mom's
back, listening to her cry.
Soothing her.
**********************************
'Cause I need you
And I miss you
And now I wonder....
**********************************
She caught his shadow by accident. Lorelai screamed, falling apart at the
foot of the stairs, her clothes in scrunched in her hands.
"Dean?"
He gave a sad smile.
Rory blushed,"You shouldn't be here"
"Need a hand?" Dean pushed the screen door open.
Rory stepped back from her mom, closing her eyes.
"Come on Lorelai" Dean unfurled her hands from the shirt,"You need to get dressed"
his hands shook,"You need to strong for Rory"
He looked up at her.
Rory looked away, her body shaking.
"I can't..I can't. I never said I was sorry to my dad. I never told him, I can't"
She cried.
Dean nodded, moving a piece of hair out of the woman's eyes."Is Luke coming?"
Rory nodded.She watched him lead her mom to the couch, cover her with a blanket.
"Did you eat?"
That was question was almost as frustrating as everyone muttering something
about the man she barely knew. Like it hurt her that he was gone. It didn't
hurt. It terrified her.
********************************
If I could fall
Into the sky
Do you think time
Would pass me by
'Cause you know I'd walk
A thousand miles
If I could
Just see you
Tonight
*********************************
That was how Rory told the story. The whole world fuzzing up, turning
gray, her cheeks burning, legs shaking, the scream in her chest bubbling
into her throat.
Dean holding her face to his chest, muffling the cries."Sshh, come on"
he lead her to the car,"We're almost there, Rory"
She let him lay her in the seat, closed the door behind her. Rory hugged
her knees, crying.
Crying the fear away.
"Let it out" Dean said quietly, pulling away from the cemetry."Let it out
Rory"
Letting the scream out. Her throat grew raw, but she kept screaming,
screaming the fear away with her tears.
He pulled into the driveway of the house, and held her.
"I miss him"
Dean smoothed her hair,"You need to sleep.Come on.."
"I miss him Dean"
He nodded, "I know"
"I miss him alot"
***************************************
Making my way downtown
Walking fast
Faces passed
And I'm home bound
***************************************
Luke stood behind Lorelai's chair, following her stare. Staring at the
hole where the coffin lay.
"He's gone"
"He is"
"It's over"
"For now"
"Oh god" she sighed.
Luke held out his hand."Come on. Dean took Rory home"
Lorelai nodded."Oh no.." she kicked off her heels, running towards Luke's
car.
******************************************
Staring blankly ahead
Just making my way
Making my way
Through the crowd
*******************************************
"RORY!" she called, running through the house.
Dean kissed her forehead, and got up quietly off the bed. He moved aside,
letting Lorelai pass him.
"I'm sorry" Rory's tear streaked face peeked out from under the blankets.
"It's fine Mom"
Lorelai climbed onto the bed,holding Rory in her arms."I..I'm sorry"
She held her daughtet close to her as Rory cried.
grumbled."Hello?"
That was how Rory told the story, waking up to her mother's
frantic cries.
"Rory! Oh god, RORY!" her hysterical tears, the stampeding
of her feet as she raced down the staircase,"RORY!"
"Mom?" the teenager rubbed her eyes
Tears streamed down Lorelai's face as she shakingly attempted to throw a
coat over her pajamas."Oh no, oh god"
"Mom?"
"Your grandpa...he's"
"MOM!" her voice was frantic,"You can't just wake me up and .." a sick
pressure built up in her chest, making Rory wish she could scream.
"We need to get to the hospital" was all Lorelai could say.
***********************************
Making my way downtown
Walking fast
************************************
Luke concentrated on the screeching of the tires that passed
his apartment window."Lorelai's" he muttered
"What?" Jess called
"Nothin'" Luke answered, his eyes wide open,"It's nothin'"
***********************************
Faces passed
And I'm home bound
***********************************
They ran down a long poorily lit corridor, hearts racing
That was how Rory told the story. Feeling that pit in her stomach when
she realized why they were there. And no laughter could make
this go away.
"Grandma!" Rory yelled, racing behind her mother
A doctor pulled Lorelai aside and whispered.Rory watched her mother
fall into a chair, holding her face in her hands.
Rory watched her grandmother take her grandfather's hand, tears
racing down the old woman's cheeks.
Behind her, the doctor kneeled down in front of Lorelai,patting her
back akwardly as she cried.Loud hysterical tears.
*************************************
Staring blankly ahead
Just making my way
Making my way
Through the crowd
**************************************
There's something to be said for schedule. Wake up, wake Jess up, get dressed.
Luke had his daily ritual. Baseball hat, look around, leave apartment. Get to
diner.
Everything had a place, a place for everything. She'd come in at 6. Then
at 9.
He looked up at the clock, down at the door.
"Luke?" Sookie stood in the door of the diner, her eyes
blood shot and red.
"Sookie?" he ran out to the door.Luke stopped."Sookie?"
She stood in the doorway, Luke's figure shadowed by the sun.
"Tell Jess.."
She nodded
"I'll be.."
"Just go Luke" Sookie's voice was quiet,"She needs you"
*********************************
And I need you
*********************************
They sat side by side.Each silently , occasionally sniffling, or quietly
crying into their hands.
He's dead. He's dead.
The nurses came occasionally. They touched Rory's shoulder and muttered
something.
We're sorry of your loss.
"Let me talk to your mom" Christopher's voice broke up the silence
between father and daughter over the phone.
Rory handed Lorelai the phone. Closing her mother's fingers around the object.
Lorelai nodded, her eyes shiny and wet."No, I know. She knew " she'd repeat
quietly.
Like Rory couldn't hear.
**********************************
And I miss you
And now I wonder....
***********************************
Someone pressed a small black phone book into Rory's hand and walked away.
She made phone call after phone call. She looked up at the clock, bought
coffee,which sat at her mother and grandmother's side untouched, and
made more phone calls.
The more phone calls, the more people who came.
They came in suits, smelling musty and clean, like they'd hidden in a library,
just like her grandfather. They crowded,fake smiliy, on their way to work.
Rory stood behind her mother's chair, watching her grandmother get passed from
person to person.
Into stranger's arms who held her and said the same things as she cried
"We're so sorry. He was a good man"
They nodded towards Lorelai. And then the room was quiet again.
"Hey" a hand touched Rory's shoulder,reaching over her and taking the
phone from her."I hate these things.Have you eaten?"
"I'm fine Luke" his eyes were so gentle then. Rory winced at the sound of
her tired, worn voice.
"You need a break" he followed her eyes. She was watching Lorelai and
Emily."They'll keep"
"L..Luke?" Lorelai's voice sounded like sobs when she spoke,"Is that you?"
Luke turned his head, an eye on Rory,"Have you eaten?"
The woman ran into his arms, crying into his chest. Luke patted her back
akwardly."It'll be alright" he said quietly,"I promise"
****************************************
If I could fall
Into the sky
Do you think time
Would pass me by
*****************************************
Rory called the funeral home. She called the florist. Jaw clenched
she went through her grandfather's suits, looking for the right one.
She fell back into his oversized chair, shaking.
Too much to do, too little time to cry.
****************************************
'Cause you know I'd walk
A thousand miles
If I could
Just see you
Tonight
****************************************
Her mother wouldn't touch food. Luke came by everyday. Dean lurked in
the shadows.
"I can't!" Lorelai screamed,"I JUST CAN'T!! How do you expect me to FUNCTION
when my father's been dead for 2 days??"
Rory stepped back, jaw clenched.
"It's alright" Luke replied, heading up the stairs after Lorelai,"She
didn't mean it"
Rory just nodded.
***************************************
It's always times like these
When I think of you
***************************************
She saw Dean once.He stood at the front door, clutching flowers,
muttering something.
I'm sorry about your grandfather.
Rory had no time. No time for sleep,no time for food. The car radio
irritated her. Smiling people bugged her.
Deep deep down inside, she held onto a scream.Scream and tears.
*************************************
And I wonder
If you ever
Think of me
***************************************
"Have you eaten,Rory?" Emily's voice was fragile. She finally sounded old
and tired."You look horrible.Your grandfather would be worried"
"I'm fine Grandma" she answered, avoiding her grandmother's eyes."The
car's coming at noon, the service is at one, and your outfit is at the
cleaners.Did I miss anything?"
Emily Gilmore shook her head."He was so proud of you, Rory"
Rory walked out of the room.Three days was too soon. Too soon for the
praise she never heard herself come out of her grandfather's mouth.
It was too soon.
***********************************
'Cause everything's so wrong
And I don't belong
Living in your
Precious memories
************************************
She could count how many times she had seen the sun rise and fall each day.
Count the days on her fingers. She stayed up all night rubbing her mom's
back, listening to her cry.
Soothing her.
**********************************
'Cause I need you
And I miss you
And now I wonder....
**********************************
She caught his shadow by accident. Lorelai screamed, falling apart at the
foot of the stairs, her clothes in scrunched in her hands.
"Dean?"
He gave a sad smile.
Rory blushed,"You shouldn't be here"
"Need a hand?" Dean pushed the screen door open.
Rory stepped back from her mom, closing her eyes.
"Come on Lorelai" Dean unfurled her hands from the shirt,"You need to get dressed"
his hands shook,"You need to strong for Rory"
He looked up at her.
Rory looked away, her body shaking.
"I can't..I can't. I never said I was sorry to my dad. I never told him, I can't"
She cried.
Dean nodded, moving a piece of hair out of the woman's eyes."Is Luke coming?"
Rory nodded.She watched him lead her mom to the couch, cover her with a blanket.
"Did you eat?"
That was question was almost as frustrating as everyone muttering something
about the man she barely knew. Like it hurt her that he was gone. It didn't
hurt. It terrified her.
********************************
If I could fall
Into the sky
Do you think time
Would pass me by
'Cause you know I'd walk
A thousand miles
If I could
Just see you
Tonight
*********************************
That was how Rory told the story. The whole world fuzzing up, turning
gray, her cheeks burning, legs shaking, the scream in her chest bubbling
into her throat.
Dean holding her face to his chest, muffling the cries."Sshh, come on"
he lead her to the car,"We're almost there, Rory"
She let him lay her in the seat, closed the door behind her. Rory hugged
her knees, crying.
Crying the fear away.
"Let it out" Dean said quietly, pulling away from the cemetry."Let it out
Rory"
Letting the scream out. Her throat grew raw, but she kept screaming,
screaming the fear away with her tears.
He pulled into the driveway of the house, and held her.
"I miss him"
Dean smoothed her hair,"You need to sleep.Come on.."
"I miss him Dean"
He nodded, "I know"
"I miss him alot"
***************************************
Making my way downtown
Walking fast
Faces passed
And I'm home bound
***************************************
Luke stood behind Lorelai's chair, following her stare. Staring at the
hole where the coffin lay.
"He's gone"
"He is"
"It's over"
"For now"
"Oh god" she sighed.
Luke held out his hand."Come on. Dean took Rory home"
Lorelai nodded."Oh no.." she kicked off her heels, running towards Luke's
car.
******************************************
Staring blankly ahead
Just making my way
Making my way
Through the crowd
*******************************************
"RORY!" she called, running through the house.
Dean kissed her forehead, and got up quietly off the bed. He moved aside,
letting Lorelai pass him.
"I'm sorry" Rory's tear streaked face peeked out from under the blankets.
"It's fine Mom"
Lorelai climbed onto the bed,holding Rory in her arms."I..I'm sorry"
She held her daughtet close to her as Rory cried.