You are the better man
Takes place immediately after 8x16 – night of Stefan's funeral
Elena woke to Damon trembling beside her. He lay on his back, his body was tense and his head was shaking as "no Stefan" continued to escape his lips. It was agonizing for Elena to see him like this.
They'd come home with Bonnie and Matt that night after the funeral. Ric had come back for Caroline when he heard about Stefan. Considering Elena was occupied with a very vulnerable Damon, Ric knew that their daughters were the only support system Caroline had left, so he drove the four of them to a motel not far from Mystic Falls to spend the night. After Caroline left, Damon drove Elena, Bonnie and Matt home in the Camaro. He didn't say a word the entire trip home. He just sat there, gripping Elena's hand beside him in search for comfort. In the back, Bonnie was exhausted. Despite only recently regaining her ability to perform magic again, her numerous attempts to wake Elena from Kai's spell drained almost all of her supernatural energy.
Damon stumbled, weak from grief, as he climbed out of the Camaro. Although Elena didn't have the reflexes she did as a vampire, she was quick to reach him. She supportively rubbed her hand up and down his arm as they walked up the footsteps towards the mansion. When they got inside Damon decided it best to pull out the oldest bourbon bottles in the house so they all could sit by the fire and drink to Stefan's not so short life.
Damon learnt quickly that his alcohol tolerance was significantly less as a mortal as he sat on the couch slightly confused about the events of the day with a blurred vision of the fireplace before him. It was late, Bonnie was practiucally asleep and Matt and Elena sat in silence remembering Stefan in their own thoughts. The emotion was starting to grow on Damon with all the silence around him and his eyes began to pool with water. Elena, borderline sober – aware of her tolerance, saw him slowly falling apart and decided to call it a night. She hugged Bonnie and Matt goodnight before she led Damon to his room to get some rest. Bonnie and Matt took refuge on the couch.
When they reached his room, which notably took much longer than usual because Damon stumbled up the stairs, Elena grabbed him a towel for a shower. It had been years but she still knew her way around the place. Damon had managed to lift his shirt off however was struggling with the button and the zip on his jeans: "Argh I can't" he muttered just audibly in her direction. Elena sighed and walked over to him, kneeling down to his waist height. She got the button undone and as she proceeded to the zip she felt him stiffen. She didn't take much notice given how smashed he was, although it did make her wonder, slightly worried and jealous, about what had potentially happened between him and other women in the years she was gone. She did tell him to live his life but that was for his sake, not hers.
"Only once" he said as she stood up. He had predicted what she was thinking when he noticed her look at the bulge in his jeans. "Her name was Krystal" he continued. "And it was after I thought something bad had happened to you... I thought I killed you and I was reckless and stupid and she came onto me and it just happened" he added seeking to justify himself. When he found out, through Enzo, that Elena was still alive he struggled with his infidelity. He needed Elena's forgiveness for that night more for his own sanity. Relieved and surprised that it was only once, Elena replied "I love you so much". A single tear escaped Damon's eye and he leaned it, slightly off balance still, for a passionate, bourbon-infused kiss.
He refused to let Elena go as she muttered to him in between kisses that he should probably take a shower but now that his zip was undone, his erect length was fully pressed through his jeans and Elena was beginning to lose control. Damon stripped her of her cardigan, with notable difficulty, and held her tight against him as he continued to plant kisses down her neck. She began to slowly grind against him, giving into the temptation. He turned her around and undid the zip on her dress, again with difficulty, and slipped the straps over her shoulders so her breasts were now exposed. She let the dress fall to the ground and stepped out of it so she was only in her underwear. Damon embraced her tighter resuming their heated kisses and walked, some may say stumbled, them backwards towards his bed. He lay her down, stepped out of his jeans and gently climbed on top of her. The warmth of their bodies colliding was what he had missed most during the years she was 'asleep'. Their lips collided and he began to rock against her with a desperation Elena had never before experienced. His hands moved from embracing her at the waist to her panty line. He removed them. Responding in desperation and sheer need, he then moved to his own boxers and threw them off to the side. He positioned himself at her entry way. He looked into her eyes in search of her approval and she nodded. It was only then as he began to enter her that she began to realise how tight she was after years of 'inactivity'. It was weirdly uncomfortable enough for her to clench her thighs, trapping him beneath them. "Elena, what's wrong?" he asked, gently touching her face. "It's been a long time since we…." she replied. "Am I hurting you?" Damon asked, shocked. "No, no, it might just take some time getting used to" she responded "just go slow" she added. Then, he was soft and moved slowly until she was comfortable. Pressed beneath her tight walls, he felt at home. He let Elena lead the way – he didn't want to cause her any pain. His hips moved in sync with hers as she gently thrusted against him. Whilst they took it steady, given the time they had apart and the desperation in their touch, it didn't take much effort for both of them to climax. Elena shivered with pleasure beneath Damon and he let his body gently rest on hers as he planted kisses down every square inch of her body. They lay, cradled together, and eventually fell asleep. It would have been a half hour of sleep at most before the trembling began.
Elena reaches her hand up to cup the face of the trembling man beside her. He shudders upon her touch and opens his eyes. "Damon it's me, it's Elena, it's okay" she assures him. She watches him as a single tear slips from his eyes. He turns on his side, facing away from her in an effort to conceal his emotion. "Damon, look at me" she reaches for him and he turns back around to look at her. "It should've been me, I'm not a good person Elena. I make bad choices. He's the better man. It should've been me, not Stefan" he quietly sobs, finally letting his walls down. Elena embrace him, their naked bodies pressed tight against each other again. "No Damon" she whispers, "you're the better man". Her eyes begin to swell too, not just because she has lost Stefan, but because she's overwhelmed to have found someone better - the Damon Stefan wanted her to know. She's found him and she's home.
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