HOW I MET KAKASHI-DOBE
The dull grey classroom buzzed with the mindless chatter of the new genin. The blinding sunlight streamed through large windows onto the tile floor and spotless white washed desks making the whole off-white room almost too bright to look at. Even from the few shadows this blinding light cast, any decent ninja (of genin level) could have told you it was a half hour before noon. Of course because of low standards and cheap tests; that group only consisted of me, my thirteen year old oji-san and Haruno-baka. I laid my head down on my arm, Uchiha black hair falling over both my eyes helping block out the vile white rays of death the mocking windows were allowing into the room. Poor Konoha…
Next to me oji-san shifted; he hates the light even more than I do. He would never admit it willingly though-he can be even more stubborn than Baka-Teme. I'd never tell him this not because I don't have the guts (or will) to but how would you like being compared to the one person you live to kill? Baka-Teme…the bastard, the fool, the a**-wipe that killed every Uchiha but his baby brother, and…well he'd have killed me too if he'd found me… I mentally sighed and cleared my head of thought. Rather I tried to but my blond haired obsession popped up after five seconds of meditation. Naaaruuutooo, my mind purred with content. Naruto- D*mn-it! NO, I promised oji-san I wouldn't obsess at school. I promised I wouldn't obsess at school, I purr…He's so~ HOTT! my will power wasn't just wavering: It was having a full-on seizure!
"…Kiku…" Oji-san spoke, a barely audible question to his voice. To the untrained ear this would have been lost, but I caught it. I am one of the best ninja in the blinding room (even if I'm only ten years old).
"'M fine, but apparently my will-power is epileptic."
Oji-san couldn't help but smirk at this. "No matter how many ridiculous comments you make, I'm always surprised."
"I hope you're not on my team if that catches you off-guard," I joked.
The half-glare he threw my way wasn't very convincing as his suppressed smile twitched onto is face. I giggled at him… this was the first time he'd "smiled" away from home since…the incident. Unfortunately the moment was short lived, as oji-san's rival and my obsession, Naruto Uzumaki, crouched on the counter/desk in front of said uncle.
[P.O.V. = 3rd]
The yellow haired genin stared-down his main problem, Sasuke Uchiha; the best genin in the class, and, in Naruto's opinion, the biggest prick ever…Next to Mizuki who didn't count right now as he was in jail.
"What's so d*mn special about you?" the noisy ninja hissed at the Uchiha heir.
"You mean that I can beat you into next week, or the fact I'm not dead last?" The black haired teen inquired not missing a beat.
Naruto twitched at this. His ego may be bigger than Sasuke's (not much but a little) but his grades were worse than Choji. And that was horrible no matter how you looked at it. Being lower than Shikamaru was acceptable because he was a genius under all the lazy-ness; Choji wasn't.
Now, if Kikurai had been paying the slightest bit of attention to something other than the orange-clad blond in front of her she would have been able to stop this next event from happening. But given her personality, she probably would have just started laughing earlier. The genin in the row before the three happed to bump into the already too-close-to-rivals-face Naruto, causing said dunce's lips to fall onto Sasuke's.
3…
2…
1…
"Bwa-ha-ha-ha...!" Kikurai fell off her seat laughing at the predicament of the two boys as they made awful gagging sounds, trying to force the feeling of the other away. The Sasuke fan-girls squealed at the worst thing to ever happen: Because it was horrible for some girl to 'steal' Sasuke's first kiss, even worse for it to be a guy, but Naruto?!
Rabid fans circled the poor blond who was still gagging and sputtering from the dreadful event and a loud cracking of knuckles was heard. About this time Kiku was done laughing at the older Uchiha and turned to see the fan's fists starting to fly. She didn't think, anyone there would have said she didn't even move, but in an instant she and Naruto (who was still cowering not having noticed the change in position) were a few feet from where Kikurai started.
The girls turned to the female Uchiha with dark looks, which Kiku returned with an emotionless face and an unsheathed and shimmering kunai. Then Iruka-sensai entered the now silent room, signaling the fan-girls it was over. But Kikurai didn't move from her defensive position until all of them had left to their seats.
As the last one left, she looked down at Naruto, who'd finally realized he wasn't going to be pummeled, and helped him to his feet. Iruka turned to address the class and noticed Kikurai and Naruto just sitting down and the glinting blade still in the young Uchiha's hand.
"Kikurai," He barked, "weapons away."
The still pissed genin tilted her head to the side and her jet-black bangs that used to hide the one major difference between her and Sasuke fell away. This uncovered the blood red glow of Sharingon; the Uchiha kekki genkai. She had gotten the eyes at eight, like her father, but for whatever reason, one of her Sharingon wouldn't turn off. It scarred some of the kids when her eyes were two different colors so she hid the red one with her bangs brushed to the side.
Iruka shivered a little but stayed firm, "Put it away, now."
"Okay…" The youngest Uchiha seemed to snap out of a trance, and the kunai disappeared again. Her raven bangs slipped back into place as she nestled her head in her arms again. Iruka began talking about teams, but Kiku wasn't listening, falling so deep into thought that she jumped when Sasuke nudged her. "W-what?"
"Now who's off-guard?" Sasuke mussed, "You missed your team."
"What?" the half-Uchiha gave a confused look.
The full-blood rolled his eyes, "Team 7 is me, Haruno, dead-last and because of odd numbers you."
"…what…?"
Sasuke face palmed, Can she get any denser?
Naruto slung an arm around Kiku's shoulders chuckling, "You're on my team."
Now Kikurai, who was trying very hard not to take advantage of the blond ninja's sudden boundary ignorance, could only pout, "We're both with Sasuke and Haruno-baka too, so it won't be as fun."
Naruto's face dropped as he looked to his friend's uncle. "Yeah…Sasuke may be a problem." Then he cracked up laughing, as Sakura leered at him. Kiku and Sasuke looked at each other, then Kiku spun toward their teacher, "Iruka-sensai, question."
The chunin looked cautiously at the Uchiha kid, "Yes, Kikurai?"
"When did you become suicidal?"
[Five Hours Later P.O.V. = Kikurai]
"Where is this Jounin? Everyone else has left already." Sakura whined pathetically.
I glowered at her baka-ness and looked at Naruto; who was a much better view. He was leaning against the far wall twirling an eraser in one hand, looking extremely bored. I would have just ogled him till Kakashi Hatake got here but, seeing the eraser; my joker instinct over rode my obsession (very hard to do I know).
"Hey, Naruto-kun," I called. He looked my way, and I gave a devilish grin, "Le' me see that eraser."
He immediately new where this was going and, tossing me the black rectangle, drug a chair over to the sliding door. I stood on the chair and wedged the block in the top of the door as Haruno-baka complained about getting in trouble. Naruto chuckled happily and I jumped down and pulled the chair back. "That's what the dunce gets for being so d*mn late," I spat at the pink-haired prat.
Not five seconds later a Jounin opened the door. The eraser fell with a soft 'whap' on his head then flopped to the floor. All was quiet in the large (and still bright) room. The one little bird chirping outside seemed like a buzzard dyeing most painfully. No movement either which was highly annoying.
Eventually the grey haired Jounin looked at Naruto and me with his one visible eye, causing said blond to shiver. Then he straightened up, adding Oji-san and Haruno-baka to his gaze. "From these first events I can conclude…" As he trailed off in thought; Naruto and I joined our teammates by the desks. "Ah, Yes! I have to say, I hate you all."
[P.O.V.= 3rd]
All but Kakashi and Kiku sweat dropped; this foolish guy couldn't possibly be a Jounin. Of coarse Kiku, as credit to her thought possesses, simply smiled and said, "Oo~h! I hate you too Dobe-sensei!"
Kiku seemed to ponder something happily, and Naruto, being just as foolish as the Jounin, asked the question.
"What's so funny?"
Kiku grinned, "I was just thinking Dobe-sensei might make-up for Pinky's uselessness.
Naruto frowned, "She's not completely useless, Kiku-kun."
"You're right; she can always be live bait or a distraction," Kiku giggled innocently.
The elder Uchiha rolled his eyes, "Says the second noisiest ninja in the village."
"I'm only second? D**n, I gotta try harder."
Kakashi sweat dropped, What did I do to deserve this?
[Scene= Academy Roof]
"Oh god, the sun!" Kikurai whined as she fell dramatically onto one of the stairs. Her team mates either laughed or completely ignored her and took seats near by as instructed. Kakashi gave mental sigh, Iruka's so getting it tonight.
He leaned on the railing in front of his squad thinking of 101 ways to get back at his friend, until too-eager-for-her-own-good Sakura, asked why they were here.
The grey haired nin lazily looked at the teen, "The first part of a decent working team is knowing each other. So, to start, let's here a little about yourselves."
"Like what?" Sasuke asked, having finally gotten his niece to sit down and shut up.
"You know your likes, your dislikes, hopes, dreams, hobbies, that sort of stuff." The Jounin's team blinked at him, …What…?
"So who's first? Haruno, how about you?"
The pink haired konoichi giggled with glee as she began babbling about everything from favorite color to how many pairs of shoes she owned. "…and I like- hee, hee- a certain someone," she continued looking at Sasuke. "Oh and I hate Naruto, and-"
For kripe's sake woman, SHUT UP!" Kikurai snapped at the twittering girl. "You're not that interesting –really- you're not."
Sakura sneered at the other flower, "Oh and you are?"
"Tch- Yeah," Kikurai smirked, "I have more than a one dimension personality and some moral fiber."
Her uncle looked questioningly at her, "Where?"
"Just 'cause I don't use it doesn't mean I don't have it….some where."
"You're up Kikurai," Scare-crow said ending the 'argument.'
"Okay. I'm Kikurai Uchiha, I hate liars and snobs and like hanging with friends and getting back at people."
She thought for a moment, and the blond who had been silent until now chuckled. "Yeah, don't get on Kiku's hit-list."
The younger Uchiha grinned evilly, "Yes, but more than that my goal is to keep those precious to me alive." Now the child looked at Kakashi her eyes narrowed into a daringly poisonous glare that would make small children cry. "…Keep them safe and find out way a weasel sheds tears for the blood he spilt." It was then that the Jounin knew something was amiss.
Sasuke and Naruto gave quick explanations of them selves ending in an argument that would have gone to fists if Kakashi hadn't stepped in. He gave a hard word on cooperation, briefed them on a training exercise and left them the rest of the day to do whatever (which by this time was two hours before dark).
Sasuke left for home almost immediately fallowed most of the way by his bright shadow Sakura until he brought up training and 'poofed' elsewhere. Kikurai and Naruto headed straight to Ichimaru's Ramen shop, for dinner chatting about new pranks.