Author's Note: After about six years, I am writing a multi-chapter fan fictions for Fushigi Yuugi. I was reading Gben Kaiden and then replaying some part of Suzkau Ibun. As a result, I ended up rereading parts of the manga as well as my own fan fiction. I then realised that I want to re-write my story, because in my early versions, Yuri did not have much a character and romance was the main focus. I want to rewrite it into a much darker version that I hope is more realistic, with a bit more focus on character. I am still using Yuri as my OC and it will still be a HotohorixOC fan fiction. Hoewver, this fan fiction will more grimer, as it will show that love alone is not enough to fix everything. Yuri will still have much of her old characteristic, her insecurity for one.

Basically, I have made two major changes in regard to Hotohori.

1-during the events of the manga, he will be twenty, as I need the extra two years

2-Boushin will be his nephew, although he will still be Houki's son.

Then, of course, there is the OC pairing

Technically, Konan is actually spelt as Kounan. But since everyone tend to just use Konan, I'll do it too.

Once again, I'll be using songs of Fushigi Yuugi at the very front

Disclaimer: I own nothing of Fushigi Yuugi.

Prologue

"Even though I know how sad this is
I keep on thinking of you
Even though we cannot meet one another"
~ (I should have known)

Saihitei, the fourth emperor of Konan, was a man who had a very striking and unusual appearance. Despite being deeply burdened with the weight of ruling, his face was still unmarked by any lines. The face that he was once so vain of was still very beautiful, and his hair was still very thick.

However, that hair was no longer the raven hue that he was so proud of. Instead, it was pure white.

His beauty had always been haunting, but it was even more so due to his contradicting hair.

His hair turned pure white on the night that he learnt of his empress' death, when the messenger from Kutou threw the blood-stained qin to him. His eyes then become distant, as if he was seeing what no one else would see. Sometimes, it was even worse as it would seem that he did not even belong into this world.

He was standing under a cherry blossom tree and as he stretched his hand towards the falling petals, there was a very out of the world image.

There was also a deep sorrow, making the boy that would soon become a man wanting to do something. Anything.

"Ojiue, what are you doing?"

"Boushin." His uncle acknowledged with a smile. The young boy long noticed that his uncle never truly smiled the way that others would, as the smile from his uncle was always sad. "I can say the same for you. It is late and you should be sleeping."

"I was reading and I decided that it would be best for me to walk a bit before I sleep." He said honestly. He was nervous at being alone with his uncle the emperor, as the other was someone that he revered greatly. However, he was also happy at the chance of talking privately to the one that he so admired.

It was not easy to have the emperor as an uncle. He was well aware of how busy the other was, even though the other would still make sure that he spent sometimes with the boy that would one day rule.

"I am pleased at how hard you are studying but you must remember to have enough rest." Now that Saihitei was alone with a family member, his voice was very gentle.

"I will. However…shouldn't ojiue be resting too?"

At this, the other lowered his hands so that the young boy could see the petals in his hand. The cherry blossom petals with their soft pink and white that almost all called beautiful.

Then the other moved his hand so that the petals drifted to the ground. At this, Boushin could not help but to shift his gaze in order to follow the few petals. Perhaps the beauty of the cherry blossoms was in their death too, as it was not just their blooming that was admired, as it was also how the petals fall.

"Tomorrow," Saihitei said softly but very firmly. "I am going to order these cherry blossom trees to be cut down. Some would probably be re-rooted to other parts of the palace, but a lot of them…will be chopped down."

"Why?" Boushin cried out. It was not just that he found the cherry blossoms beautiful, but because this was an act that was rather out of character from his uncle. His uncle loved beauty as it was things that could cause him to smile slightly.

"A reminder that this is all worthwhile." He had told Boushin once when the other's mother placed some lilies onto his table.

"Boushin, do you know where we are? Rather, what specific part of the palace we are in?"

"The quarter of the…empress." he was nervous at this because the death of the empress was something that the emperor has yet to get over. It was almost a taboo subject.

"But what has that got to do with this?" Boushin asked. "Why are you suddenly cutting down cherry blossom tress?"

"Yuri is finally going to return to me after fifteen years. Did you not hear the news? They found her and Shinantei will let her rest here. She will rest here…so I cannot let her rest under any cherry blossoms."

Boushin has been to Kutou before and he knew that the last empress of Konan was buried there. She was once a princess from Kutou and happened to be in Kutou during the war where the two gods were summoned. That period was also when almost all of Kutou's royal family were killed due to the revolt of a general.

The empress of Konan was there too, the crime being that she was a princess of Kutou as the same time.

There was no exact grave as no one knew where exactly she was buried. However, she was in that garden filled with lilies and a pool of lotuses.

He remembered that place well as he uncle had knelt there in the middle of the night and wept.

The officials and courtiers rarely mentioned the empress- only that she seemed to have took part of the emperor with him. As he loved her so much, he refused to remarry or even have a concubine. Therefore, his heir was actually his elder brother, a brother that he has been separated from for so long. Through his father, Boushin would one day inherit the kingdom as he was the eldest son.

If the last empress had lived, then things would probably be very different.

"Does Hourengou dislike the cherry blossoms?" Boushin asked.

"She hates them." Saihitei said bluntly. "She said that they were ugly because they are flowers that are drenched with blood. She also said that admiring them is like admiring corpses that are mutilated."

"Ojiue…are you alright?" the young boy was no longer asking a question due to curiosity, but because he was actually more then a little concerned. "Would you like me to escort you back?"

"I am fine." Saihitei reassured the other, smiling gently. "I am not going mad. That was what she said to me and I had been shocked too. It was right here and I told her that there were no such things with any of the cherry blossoms in my palace."

"What did she say to you?"

"She started to laugh and cry. When she finally spoke, she said: 'Yes, because this is Konan and the cherry blossom reflects you very well. It is beautiful because it simply is. But in Kutou, our cherry blossom reflects us too well. It is beautiful because it is rotted inside. The flowers bloom at the top, but at the root are the mutilated bodies.'."

The young boy was trying to control his expression, but he must not have completely succeeded, as his uncle immediately smiled apologetically at him.

"I should not be saying these things to you." he said. "But it is just that it has been so long since I talk about her to anyone. Everyone who I can talk about her with often feels guilty at the mere mentioning of her name."

Boushin was not able to learn much of this as it was a past that those around him rarely talked about. As Saihitei said, guilt the cause.

He was aware of the war between the two now amiable nations. It was a war that resulted in the priestess of Suzaku and Seiryuu appearing. At the same time, Kutou also had an extreme civil war where one of the generals revolted.

A very large number of lives were lost, especially in Kutou. However, both kingdoms managed to climb back. Kutou even had a new ruler who managed to restore much of Kutou, even improving its relationship with the three other kingdoms. It was almost as if a fire had burnt out all the rotted root of the tree and let the new tree re-grow healthily. This man was the only survivor of the royal family of Kutou, a family that was said to live in great decadence and amorality.

Konan's loss was actually not as extreme, although there were still a few revolts within the kingdom due to the people's insecurity at what was happening. Boushin knew that his father was one of those who rebelled and it was something that his father still tormented himself over.

Konan did suffer a loss in their royal family as well: that of the empress.

"Tell me, Boushin, what do you know of my empress? Of Hourengou…of Yuri." His uncle asked, using the name that was very rarely said.

"She was a princess from Kutou She…"

Due to the tension Konan faced with Kutou as well as the problem within the kingdom, along with the fact that she has yet to bear a child, their own empress was forced to return to Kutou for a while.

"The emperor said goodbye to the empress at the gate of the palace, but the husband actually said goodbye to his wife here. That person…" at this, tears began to fall, yet it was a weeping without any sound. It was simply tears that had to fall. "She laughed and told me that she will be back very soon, and she will wait for me to finish court here. However…"

The other died alone, under another cherry blossom far away.

At that moment, the boy understood the burden that he would one day receive. Regardless of what one felt as a person, they must remain as the emperor. They must continue to do all that they could for the kingdom even if they were barely able to hold themselves together.

The cherry blossoms would be cut down as that was the only thing that Saihitei could do for his dead empress.

"Perhaps," Saihitei suddenly said and his voice was broken. "I am like that cherry blossom that she hates so much. Deep down, I am already in pieces."

The man that stood beside him was no longer the regal emperor whose words were obeyed without any question, nor was he the kind and patient uncle who praised and guided the boy in his learning. He was not even the man who admired any beauty and frowned at what he perceived as extremely distorted, as well as the man who was forced to carry so many burdens.

Boushin saw a man that was simply tired, a man that was waiting for it all to end.

Author's Notes: I do have a tendency of starting a story with a prologue that is set many years after the actual event of the story (as I did in my Final Fantasy XII fan fiction. It is because I like the idea of creating a scene and I hope to make the reader wonder: how did things get to this? And then move back in time to take the readers to the events that cause the story to end up like that. The other reason is that I tend to do this for stories with character deaths. I guess I want to make what happens clear.

I hope that some of my readers have actually read my previous Fushigi Yuugi fan fiction, although you would probably find that this is very different from my original story. Yuri is the same OC although she is now a princess of Kutou and this will have a huge effect on them. However, her personality will still be fairly similar, although one of the things that I am trying to do is to give her more character.

First of all, Yuri is a princess of Kutou and I guess I want to talk about Kutou a bit more. Since the emperor seems to be living in decadence, I feel that this would have an effect on the rest of his court (which we will see in the next chapter). The result is that it will make the story much darker.

As I mentioned, Boushin would be Hotohori's nephew, he will be the son of Houki and Tendou. I don't think that is going to be a big surprise, so I think it is alright to reveal it here.

In Ancient China (and Fushigi Yuugi seemed to have done this), the emperor and empress often have a title. Saihitei is Hotohori's title and the reason that I did not use Hotohori is because I want to show how he is alone, as he is only addressed by his title.

Shinantei is the current and new emperor of Kutou. Hourengou is Yuri's title as the empress (I changed her title since Houki will be coming out). To be honest, I think if I had known more about Houki when I first read the manga, I might be doing HotohorixHouki fan fictions now. Basically, 'tei' means emperor, and 'gou' means empress. Although someties Koutei and Kougou are used, as emperor and empress have two letters in them.

At one stage, this word 'qin' is used. Qin is "琴", a prestigious instrument in Chinese history. Yuri will actually play it (since she is a princess, I think given her this is not over the top).

Finally, an idea that I am trying to do is to associate the cherry blossom/sakura in a negative way. I just want to try doing it.