The Diary Of Jocelyn.

I just find the whole story of Jocelyn and Valentine's relationship so damn tragic. Because once upon a time, they were actually in love and had a child. And then it went all pear shaped. Because he's more than a little cookoo-cookcoo. So I wanted to have a go at a fic about it. Reviews would be very much loved- it's nice to know that people are reading and maybe enjoying it as much as I do writing it. Thank you! x

Jocelyn had spent the whole morning floating without moving in the azure lake behind the woods next to her mansion home with her thick, dark auburn hair swirling around her. She gazed unblinkingly up at clear blue sky that was littered with fluffy clouds. The moon could be seen far up, as white as the clouds. It was three fifteen in the afternoon and the midnight sun was out? Strange.

She hummed gently as the water splashed around her head, letting her eyes flutter shut- today was the day. The day that she left her home in the Idrisian countryside with Lucian and traveled to Alicante to the Academy. It was going to be a long, long day. It was a scary day too, but also full of excitement; she was to be taught how to be a true Shadowhunter. That was all she wanted.

A scream escaped her as something grabbed her ankles and yanked her down underwater. Everything went silent as the water filled her ears and then she came up with a splutter of lake water to hear loud, boyish laughter. Jocelyn's eyes were wide as she floated there, staring at the laughing boy before her. His brown hair was plastered to his head, gazing at her with wide blue eyes that reminded her of the sky above.

"You fool." Jocelyn hissed out, faking anger, slapping his arm sharply before swimming to shore. As she pulled herself out, he followed suit. But the young woman smirked deviously and placed a hand upon his chest, pushing him back in with a laugh. He resurfaced and floated upon his back, chuckling out as he closed his eyes. "I knew you'd be down here. It's our last day after all."

"I hardly think that your mother will be impressed you've jumped into a lake in your gear, Lucian." She said matter of factly, sitting down at the edge of the grassy bank and dipping her feet into the cool water of the lake, watching her friend climb out successfully, smoothing his hair back as he asked "You sound nervous."

"I'm not nervous." Jocelyn nearly snapped and Lucian cocked a brow at her. "Aren't you?" she grumbled, kicking at the water with a bare foot so it splashed. There was silence, then Lucian nodded. "I'm terrified. Just… look at the bright side."

"Oh? What's that?"

"We won't be alone. We'll have each other."

Silence fell once again and Jocelyn nodded the tiniest of fractions. "That's such a relief." It was true. There was no one else she'd rather be with in Alicante, fighting side by side, teaching and helping each other. It gave her some comfort.

Lucian placed a hand on his friends bare shoulder, telling her in amusement. "Come on, take that swimsuit back before your mother realizes. Pretty sure that's her favorite one?"

"Yes." Jocelyn laughed and scrambled to her feet, Lucians smile fading just a fraction as he realized what was going to happen, but was too slow to deflect it as she pushed him into the water once more with a splash.

Adele Fairchild was a bundle of emotions that day as her daughter got ready to leave. She half didn't want her little girl to leave her, but the time had come. It had happened to her, her mother before her… everyone. Sixteen years old and all Shadowhunter children were sent away for schooling. She was proud of Jocelyn, smiling up at her as she stood in her gear at the top of the wide, sweeping marble staircase with tears sparkling in her eyes, clapping her hands together as she exclaimed. "You look… so ready, my dear daughter."

Jocelyn smiled as she stood at the bottom of the stairs and allowed her mother to hug her. "Thank you mother" she mumbled into her hair, trying not to choke on how much was in her face. That would be the most hilarious of deaths Choked to death on her mothers hair.

"Choking-" Jocelyn coughed out and felt her mother loosen her grip instantly, laughing "Oops. Sorry." The pair just hugged each other with tears streaming down their faces. Adele pressed a kiss to her daughters temple now, sighing out against her "I'm going to miss you."

"We get a week off in a month. Don't worry mother, you'll see me soon."

She took her daughters face into her hands and smiled tearfully. "If only your father wasn't so badly needed, he'd be here to see you off as well." She traced her thumb over her daughter's soft cheek, her smile softening. "But you'll see him in the Glass City. I assure you." Adele let her daughters face go as she heard the sound of hooves outside, telling her. "That'll probably be Lucian. He sent word that he was going to meet you here."

Jocelyn frowned. "No horse and carriage?"

"No. Because I want you to ride into Alicante with him on that horse with your head high like a true Fairchild. A warrior. Not a mundane princess in her carriage. You are going to bring pride upon this family, I know you are."

Jocelyn nodded and picked up her bag, smiling a little. "No worries there my dear mother. Pride is all I intend to bring this family."

"I love you Jocelyn. Now go. Before I turn into a crying mess."

Her daughter laughed at that, shaking her head a little as she tutted out. "I must go. Don't want to be late."

"Oh yes. Go." Adele said hurriedly, almost flustered as she shooed her daughter towards the door that the maid was opening, letting the light of day filter into the entrance hall. Jocelyn felt as if the world had suddenly stopped; she was leaving home. She was both exhilarated and terrified at the same time. She let out a low breath, then took a step forwards, hitching her bag higher onto her shoulder as she took another step. Then another. Then another. She stood before her pure white horse Bellatrix and ran a hand along her smooth flank, then proceeded to tie her bag to the leather straps affixed to the saddle, hitching herself up to she was at eye level with Lucian, smiling at him as she breathed out, excitement lacing her voice. "Ready?"

"Always." Lucian grinned, looking down from his chestnut steed at Mrs. Fairchild who was weeping silently as she bade them goodbye.

Jocelyn raised her hand in farewell as she and Lucian urged their horses into a canter, and soon the mansion was far behind them.

The journey wasn't too long, and from the races they had along the way, all which Jocelyn won, they were there in no time. Idris was beautiful with its lush countryside bursting with flowers of every shape and size. And the color. It was beyond amazing.

Bellatrix grazed lightly as the pair of young Shadowhunters stood atop a hill, staring at the Glass City at the bottom of the long hill.

"It's beautiful." Lucian muttered, taken aback by the shimmering demon towers that caught the sunlight, finally understanding just why it was called 'The Glass City.' Jocelyn bit her bottom lip now, realizing she'd been transfixed by the brilliance of the city when she cleared her throat. "Come on" she called back to her companion as she nudged Bellatrix into moving forwards once more. Lucian nudged his own a little too hard, making him shoot off with a yell.

Jocelyn blinked as the form of her friend upon his horse went past like a bullet, laughing out to him "By the Angel, Lucian! Stop before you end up falling off!" but the horse never slowed down and Jocelyn realized that Lucian wasn't playing around, his horse really had been spooked or something. She kicked her own into a full out run, but his horse was faster by miles.

Lucians foot came out of its stirrup now with a yell, grabbing onto his horses mane to stop himself falling off and Jocelyn called "Just hang on-!" she went wide, attempting to cut ahead, but it was no use. As she tried without fail to think of anything, a black figure shot out in front of her, so quick she jolted on the reins so hard that Bellatrix slowed to a stop, cantering forwards so she could pause at the top of the hill.

A horse as black as midnight with a rider so fair haired she first thought it was an angel had come haring down from the hills, faster than Lucians horse. Faster than any horse she'd ever seen. As Jocelyn watched in silence, the stranger on his black steed caught Lucians reins and yanked hard on them, causing his horse to jolt to a shuddering stop, throwing him clean off where he rolled a few times and was still.

Jocelyn gasped, urging her horse forwards down the hill to where Lucian was lying upon the grass. She slid from her horse and hit the ground running as she dashed over to him, falling to her knees and turning him over onto his back. He was awake, hissing out as he clutched his right elbow. "I think my elbow is dislocated. Ow-!" Jocelyn had slapped his shoulder, next to yelling out. "Don't scare me like that again!" she sighed, hugging him into her chest.

"Gladly." He muttered out, hugging her back for a second too long before groaning in pain. Jocelyn yanked his jacket off as gently as she could, biting her bottom lip as she took a hold of his elbow. "Ready?" she muttered, and he nodded, face pale. "Ready." A hard push later and Lucian yelled in pain as he felt his elbow pop back in, flexing his aching fingers. "It was a snake. He saw it and just… bolted. I wasn't strong enough to yank that hard on the reins until-" Lucian blinked and scrambled to his feet, looking around, and Jocelyn knew why- he was looking for that black horse and its rider that had come to his aid.

"I think he's gone." Jocelyn said softly, adding on "Come on, we're almost there. Get on my-"

"No. I'm going to ride into Alicante as if nothing had happened along the way." Lucian said in a determined voice, swallowing hard with his heart hammering in his chest- his elbow hurt.

Jocelyn understood and helped him climb back onto his horse, laughing out "Only you could achieve such a thing Lucian. Before we're even in the city." She sniggered at him as she hoisted herself back into Bellatrix's saddle and eased her forwards towards the gate with Lucian close behind.

Once they had their instructions on where to go from the gate, Jocelyn and Lucian walked at a slow trot through the city, suddenly feeling conscious on how new and untouched their Shadowhunter gear was compared to the ones around them. They were worn in, scratched in places and belonged.

"Thank the Angel you actually know which way you're going." Lucian laughed out to Jocelyn as he let her take the lead, and she glanced back, a playful smirk upon her face with her auburn hair windswept, hanging in her eyes. "I'm guessing. But trust a womans judgement, it's usually pretty good."

"Are you saying men can't read maps or something?"

Jocelyn just smiled sweetly at him and carried on through the city, feeling conscious as the people stared at them. Some smiled, some just had blank, severe expressions. This happened to them once upon a time, so they can't say anything Jocelyn reminded herself time and time again until they found themselves at the stables behind the Academy, sliding down from their horses with a sigh of relief- at least they'd made it. Nervous, excited and scared, they'd done it.

When they tied their horses up securely, a figure stepped around the stalls with bright eyes and a wide smile. "Oh. You're new?"

The pair nodded and Lucian asked. "What's your name?"

"Maryse Trueblood." She smiled sweetly and nodded to the doors. "You both better get inside right now."

Jocelyn said nothing as she stepped forwards, eyes deliberately ahead so the nerves didn't get to her.

Maryse arched a brow at them, then just walked off, leaving Lucian to mutter out to Jocelyn as he hitched his bag higher onto his shoulder. "You could have said Hello at least. She was new as well."

"I just want to get today over." She breathed out, walking up the stone steps and into the Academy at long last. Lucian was the one looking around in interest as he gazed around at the giant entrance hall with its walls steeped in history. She walked up to the front desk and smiled. "We're new?"

The young woman sat there and frowned. "You're late."

Lucian gulped before muttering out. "We kind of… had a little accident on the way-" he held up his sore elbow and the woman nodded a little. "Oh. That would explain it. The rest of your group are on the tour of Alicante. If you run down to Angel Square, you should catch them."

Jocelyn stared at her blankly and the woman sighed, rolling her eyes. "When you walk out of here, turn left and carry straight on down. It's before the Accords Hall. You can't miss it up on those white marble steps."

The pair nodded their thanks and were off, Lucian laughing out. "It's an adventure, isn't it?"

"If you say so." Jocelyn muttered, wondering why she was feeling so nervous. She swallowed hard and ignored her fear as they followed the womans directions, knowing exactly what she meant by You won't miss it.

Lucian let out a low whistle, staring at the Hall in admiration as the sunlight hit it- it was like snow, glittering and sparkling. Jocelyn laughed out as she quickened her steps "Remind me to buy an easel and some paints. This place makes me want to take up painting again."

"As long as you don't flick it at me again. By the Angel, that blue took ages to get out of my hair last t-" but he stopped dead as they both came to the end of the narrow street which gave way to a perfectly circular area of cobbles lined with houses. Directly in the middle was a statue, of what they couldn't see from the group milling around it. Their group.

Without hesitation, they dashed forwards and sneaked to the back of the small crowd, listening to a male voice saying-

"-furthermore, this place has always been called Angel Square. Weddings, dances and celebrations have and always will be held here."

"That's Raziel, right?" a student called and Jocelyns sharp eyes fixed themselves upon the bronze statue in the middle of the square. It was him, the Angel himself. She gazed into its serene face before looking up at the one doing the speech, the tour itself… and frowned a little; he was barely older than herself. But the way he carried himself, it spoke more words than anything else. He was wearing his gear, no doubt setting an example to the newer students. A seraph blade was glinting at his belt. Jocelyn felt Lucian nudge her in the side and mutter out "Look at his horse."

The horse was black. So black that Jocelyn didn't need Lucian to say anything else… this was the young man that had more or less saved him.

She focused her gaze upon him through the crowd as it jostled a little, catching sight of his face for a split second; tall with proud, lean features. His hair was a halo of white blonde, and eyes black. She knew that for sure, because they fixed upon her own emerald green ones for a moment. Her heart skipped a beat, not realizing they were moving onwards until Lucian poked her in the side once more to make her realize. The young man was at the head of the group, opening his arms as he called. "And this is where you'll be staying for your time here in Alicante." Jocelyn blinked as he motioned to the houses around him, specifically on the right. Oh. She realized they were student accommodation. He said nothing else, so the students started making their way to the allocated houses, shoving each other to nab the better looking ones. Lucian and Jocelyn pounced upon a house at the far end, the nearest one to the Accords Hall. All Jocelyn could think off was how beautiful the view would be when the sun rose in the morning. The light would reflect of the demon towers, the Hall and off the statue in the square. Jocelyn realized that this was an important area that they were trusting them with.

Inside, the house was on the smaller side with two bedrooms upstairs, a bathroom for each one and a living room and kitchen combined downstairs. There was no garden, just a balcony out back where you could sit and stare at the skyline of Alicante with the countryside in the distance.

Lucian threw his bag onto the sofa with a wide grin, rubbing his palms together. "This place is amazing, isn't it?"

She had to admit… it was. Jocelyn nodded, slipping her hand into her pocket and flinching, suddenly feeling a little stupid afterwards- it had only been her stele, smooth and unyielding under her fingers.

There was wooping from outside now, making Lucian frown and look out the front window to see their guide surrounded by a group of people he obviously knew well. He spied that Maryse there as well.

"Popular, isn't he?" Lucian muttered and Jocelyn walked over to the window and glanced down with him, watching the square come alive with new students and old. She grinned at Lucian, her eyes glinting as she dared him "Let's go outside and join in."

Lucian bit the inside of his cheek, but as Jocelyn started forwards, he had no choice but to follow. He shut the door behind him and followed her, blinking as she walked right over to that girl Maryse from earlier and smiled out "Apologizes about earlier. Nerves."

Maryse was taken aback by Jocelyn's sudden words, but shook her head, smiling in response. "It's… fine. It's fine-"

"Jocelyn." She beamed. "Jocelyn Fairchild." She glanced behind her. "And this is Lucian Graymark." She cocked her head a little at him, frowning out. "Graymark. You are Amatis' brother? She's around here somewhere."

"Yes." Lucian answered with a nod and Maryse nodded a fraction. "I thought so." She raised a hand and prodded the side of his nose. "Same nose." Lucian twitched it as she came into contact. She very nearly giggled. But before any other words could be spoken, a shadow fell across them all and Jocelyn looked around to spy their guide and Lucian's savior walking forwards to stop before them with an inquisitive look upon his handsome face, chuckling out-

"I saw you both, by the way."

Jocelyn smiled awkwardly. "We got lost. And you are?" the young man smiled, taking her hand into his own and bringing it up to his lips for a moment, gazing into her eyes as he replied. "Valentine. Valentine Morgenstern."

"I'm Jo-"

"Oh I heard you my dear. I saw you up upon that hill as I came to Lucian here's rescue." He smiled charmingly, letting her hand go and looking at Lucian who took his hand, shaking it firmly. "Thank you so much for your intervention earlier, or I fear I would have a more grievous injury than a mere dislocated elbow which Jocelyn healed for me. A true pleasure to meet you. Are you a tutor at the Academy?"

Valentine actually laughed at that, shaking his head. "Oh no! I'm a student." He chuckled for a moment longer before asking in an amused voice. "I look like a tutor?" his grin widened. "Is it the hair? The dashing smile?"

Lucian shook his own head, a smile upon his face that Jocelyn recognized- he was feeling much more comfortable with his surroundings. "You're seventeen?" he asked and Valentine nodded. "Yes I am. Just a mere year older than yourself, so no, I'm not a tutor. Just doing my duty for Alicante." He paused. "Actually, Michael Wayland had to be at the Gard today, so I took his place with the tour."

"That was good of you." Jocelyn spoke up and he turned his gaze upon her, nodding. "It's what friends do for each other, is it not?"

She nodded, then looked to the people stood by the statue of the angel, asking "Friends of yours?"

"You could say so." He raised a hand and pointed to each in turn, Jocelyn hearing "Pangborn, Herondale, Trueblood you know. Lightwood, Starkweather and Blackwell. There are more, but they're around and about. My friends."

Jocelyn raised an eyebrow, smiling sweetly at him. "Or a fan club."

Valentine cocked a brow of his own, laughing out. "Are you insinuating I have a fan club?" a pause, then Jocelyn nodded. "I think I am." She looked to Lucian and told him "I'm going to unpack and have a bath. I'll see you later." She left without another word and Valentine clapped Lucian on the shoulder, nodding to the group. "Join us? We have drinks."

He grinned and nodded. "Thank you. I would be honored. But… I think I'm going to go with Jocelyn." Lucian smiled weakly at him, then followed the young woman into the house.

If Jocelyn had known there and then what the future held with the boy with the white blonde hair and charcoal eyes…

She would have run with Lucian. Ran and never looked back once.

Make me a very happy bunny and review? :D