Castlevania: Prelude to a Prologue
In 1792 Dracula was defeated by Richter Belmont, notice it says defeated not killed. This was not the end though, for Dracula, being a vampire, was doomed to life and sequels never-ending. After his most recent defeat in a string of defeats by a clan of toga wearing, whip toting heroes, Dracula had to lay low for a few decades. This is where our story begins…
Shortly after his stinging defeat Dracula fled his crumbling Castle, wiping the Hydro Storm from his eyes, he began to apply for a job. He went to the site in question to begin his interview…
"I am here for my interview." Dracula says to the wizened secretary. The secretary rasps, glaring at Dracula over the top of her glasses with a look a librarian would have been proud of. "Have a seat." Dracula then plops down into a chair that has seen better days and waits. He checks the clock. Of course in a waiting room, the clock does not work to keep the waiting people from leaving. He begins to read a pamphlet on bathroom safety. Of course once he gets to an interesting part the secretary looks up and says, "The Principal will see you now."
"Now Mr. Dracula, it says here that you would like to apply for the job as a sophomore counselor," said The Principal, a large man with glasses and a plaque on his desk that read "Children Shouldn't Be Seen or Heard" glanced at Dracula. "Do you have any previous experience?" "I used to command an army of zombies and demons…" mumbled Dracula. "Oh! So you have had past teaching experience," the Principal gasped, "What about your disciplinary views?" Dracula thought for a moment and replied, "I throw all dissenters in the catacombs and let the undead feast on their flesh."
"You mean you use other students to peer pressure all trouble makers? Excellent!" the Principal looked delighted. "I can see you will be perfect for the job. You're hired."
In truth the job was the perfect way to hide. "No one pays any attention to the sophomore counselor, heck; the sophomores try to avoid me if possible," Dracula mused, "Though there are those oddballs who like to hang around their counselor's." Every day was pretty much the same. Go to work; hang up his cape in the coat closet, give advice to the strange and insecure, come home to his apartment and play Castlevania: Bloodlines to see how many different ways he could kill Richter. "Have you ever considered opening an item shop?" Dracula would offer to the occasional student, "There will be a great place for an item shop in a few years." The years passed like this without event.
One day Dracula thought to himself, "Better start preparing for the next Castlevania, I think I will call this one Symphony of the Night, the numbers are getting boring." So Dracula put out an ad for anyone/thing that would not mind taking some time off to help. The next day…
Dracula walks into his office and prepare for the interview. He looks at the clock, which now acts like all the non-digital clocks he owns in the way that the minute hand is constantly spinning. "Any time now…" Suddenly there was a knock on the door and in walks a elegantly clad man.
"Good morning, is this where I can rent a condo?" Olrox asks.
"Er… Condo?" asks a more than slightly confused Dracula.
"Yes. I am trying to get away for a while, you know, vacation," Olrox explains patiently, "I killed the last person who disturbed me, he was just playing his music too loud, it wasn't even classical."
"Really?" said Dracula, raising an eyebrow, "I think we can arrange something then."
Shortly after Olrox left, he returned and sat down in front of Dracula without a word. "Didn't I just talk to you?" asked Dracula. Olrox quickly changed forms and now looked exactly like a mime! He then handed Dracula a card which read
Doppleganger
Master of mimicry
Available for birthday parties, weddings,
baptisms and assassinations.
The Alley in 5th St. Ask the Dumpster
Or contact YourFace@Doppleganger.com
"Oh. I see, can I book you for two gigs?" asked Dracula. The Doppleganger nodded handed Dracula some papers and pulled himself out the door with an invisible rope while leaning on an invisible counter in an invisible box. "Man, mimes sure give me the creeps." Dracula shuddered.
After Dracula finished filling out the paperwork for the mime he sent the next person, or as fate would have it persons in the room. It was an odd duo, a skeletal bird thing with a pointy spear with strings and a blue bat thing with a microphone. The bird introduced himself as Slogra, and the bat turned out to be Gaibon. "We are a duo of musicians," screeched Slogra, "I play the guitar and Gaibon here sings"
"Ummm, what kind of music do you play?" Dracula blurted out, then thought "Dang! I don't wa-" His thoughts were interrupted by Slogra's screechy voice.
"We play country! We'll give you a sample."
"Uh no, wait that's not necessary, I…"
"I got me a brand new arm and a shiny new gizzard.
Ever since I had that run in with that big armored lizard
Named G-A-L-A-MOTH.
Oh it kinda hurt at first but my new appendage is so cool!"
It is so awesome it makes all the wargs drool.
It is my ticket to stardom and fame.
Call it grotesque, call me a reject,
Say what you want you know I am so boss!
OH!OHO! OH!"
"STOP! STOP! You have the job as long as you stop singing!" Dracula shouted. "Give me that guitar!" Dracula then proceeded to tear the strings off Slogra's guitar. "There, that is called a spear. You can't play a spear! Hahahahahaha! Now get to work!"
"Uh, what do we do?" asked Gaibon.
"That's simple," said Dracula. "You stand in a room and look stupid until someone comes along. Then you attack them with easily recognizable and repetitive battle strategies."
"Oh… that's easy, but you sure you don't want to hear the rest of the song?" asked Slogra hopefully.
"No."
"Okay then bye."
Once the two would be country stars left Dracula listened to some old school Castlevania sound tracks to cleanse his ears.
"Ah, much better. Next!" In came a large man looking as if he had been cobbled together from various body parts. "Uh, are you some sort of Frankenstein's monster type person?" asked Dracula politely.
"Ah, no." Said the Creature, "I once was a big shot movie star, but my constant demands on my plastic surgeon drove him over the edge."
"Really? Well then you're hired! A tragic movie star accident has got pathos."
After the Creature lumbered out who should arrive but the big man himself, Death. "Good Afternoon, I see you are looking rather, um, well, the same?" offered Dracula.
"Thank you." said Death in that tone only Death could accomplish. "Well since, as you know, I am very busy, let's get down to business. Since you are a good friend and employer," Death produced a scroll from his sleeve, "I can offer you the Executive Contract. It guarantees one pre-battle appearance, at least a whole minute of dialogue, and one two-form battle." Dracula looked the scroll over for fine print, all demons and such use fine print. "Could you hurry?" Death said impatiently. "I got a group of crazy kids chasing me, you know one of those cults that are so obsessed with death that they need rip off pieces of my robe to make dolls out of." Just then Death's keen earless hearing picked up the sound of feet. "@#$%&*!" said Death and quickly ducked into Dracula's coat closet. Right after a group of teens wearing black with t-shirts that bore phrases such as "I love Death" and "Death is cool!" burst in to the room. Dracula quickly responded "Are you here for counseling? I can help you change your schedule and pick the best college for you." The teens looked horrified and quickly left the room.
As soon as the Death groupies left, Richter Belmont entered the room. "What are you doing here!?" said Dracula standing up reaching for his wine glass.
"Chill out," said Richter calmly. "I am here about the job.
"You?" Dracula said, he would have laughed if he weren't so suspicious of his nemesis' motives. "Why?"
"Because," explained Richter, "Chicks dig villains."
"Hell Yeah!" shouted Death from the closet.
"Err… don't mind that," murmured Dracula, "but if you're going to be bad, whose going to be good?"
"How about Alucard?" suggested Richter.
"Hmmm…" thought Dracula, "That guy's hair is too long, he wears too much black, and does not use a whip or toga. But what the heck. Alright Mr. Belmont, you got yourself a job." The two former enemies got up and shook hands.
"Send the next person in on your way out." requested Dracula.
The next applicant was a large fly. It handed a stack of papers to Dracula. "It says here your lord Beezelbub would like to apply, but could not make it due to skin problems." read Dracula. The fly nodded and began to do that creepy rubbing, grooming thing that flies do. It then proceeded to devour the contents of Dracula's wastebasket. "Utterly creepy and repulsive," thought Dracula, "I have got to hire this guy, the fly even does that rubbing/ grooming thing." Dracula took the trashcan from the fly and told the fly to tell his master that he was hired.
Once all applicants were taken care of Dracula packed up and took a walk to finish the rest of his preparations. On his way to the store he took notice a man in town square. The reason this man happened to catch Dracula's eye was because he was telling a flock of pigeons to attack a small boy.
"Mighty fine talent you got there," said Dracula walking up to the man. "I wonder if you would be interested in a job."
"What kind?" asked Karasuman.
"The kind where you sit around all day and simply terrorize anyone you see." The man considered this awhile and finally said, "Sounds good to me, that's basically what I have been doing." "Good, but you might want to use something like ravens next time, more dignified."
Dracula then proceeded to the zoo. He asked the keepers to donate all uncooperative and vicious animals they could spare, especially bats. After that pit stop he went straight to Skeletons R' Us. The customer service warmly greeted him. "Welcome to Skeletons R' Us. We have a wide variety of skeletons to choose from. We've got big ones, small ones, big boned ones, skinny ones, real ones, fake ones, ones with sticks, some with stones, ones that throw bones, bombs, rocks, food, sludge, each other, ones that spin, others with karate action, some that run, those with and without the kitchen sink, and others that don't do anything at all. Right know we have a special on skeletons that dance and play the piano. We also have a two for one deal on glow-in-the-dark skeletons." Dracula produced a list he had made earlier. "I'd like you to provide everything on this list," then after a moment of thought he added, "and a few of the piano playing ones too."
With his shopping done Dracula then proceeded to the Ferryman's Real-estate.
"I'll take you to a place which might be interesting for you." the Ferryman cackled. Dracula shrugged and got on the Ferryman's boat like vehicle. Dracula was brought to a castle that was larger and more elaborate than any castle he had previously occupied. It contained floating platforms, breakable walls, candles with stuff in them… "Let me show you something that might be interesting for you." said the Ferryman as he flipped a switch on the wall. With the flip of the switch the castle started to invert.
"This castle can turn upside down!" thought Dracula, "how totally random yet strangely useful. I'll buy it!" (Which he could since he's been working as a counselor for about a hundred years)
Once all the paper work was filled out, Castlevania Symphony of the Night was ready to begin…
Now in stores! Play the sequel to this Prequel! Buy Castlevania Symphony of the Night!
Death (still in the closet): uhhh... is the coast clear? Is it safe to come out now? Hello? Helllooooo?