Please excuse all the mistakes, I'm not a native speaker (or help me find one, who enjoys rewriting all my stuff^^)
The other life
Chapter 1: Night
Two small tired cries came from the next room. Olivia woke in an instant and crawled out from under the covers. The red numbers from her clock radio on the nightstand blurred in front of her eyes, it read something past five. It was still dark outside and the air in the house smelled fresh, unused. She shivered as the warmth of the bed drained off her limbs. Sliding on her woolen socks over the timber piling in the hall, she had to pause, since her empty stomach complained and her still sleeping circulation was shouting 'Good morning!' by sending colorful dots into her vision. The motion sensor had caught her long ago and made a dim light turn on, which helped her focus. In a rapid motion she pulled open the door to the nursery. It was their deal: Peter was allowed to sleep without any disturbance until 06:30 am and in return he was supposed to have breakfast with the three older ones.
Of course they had all these questions in their minds. Should anyone expose children to this world anymore? How much protection and care would one be able to provide? Or even and at least the fact to be present?
Walter barged in, whenever they gave him time to draw breath. He encouraged, urged and begged them. Peter couldn't do different, but wonder each time, why Walter was able to slobber over being a father, since his own father-son-relationship seemed anything, but... or maybe it was admirable. But could he really be eager to face a scenario like this once more?
Gloria glanced up to her, all sleepy, sitting in her wooden crib. She made a rasping sound and held both hands into the air. The light from the hall barely reached the inside of the room, nevertheless Olivia could tell that the little girl's blond curls stuck out in every direction and her cheeks showed a glaring red. Olivia picked her up and her youngest daughter immediately dug her hot face into her mother's neck.
„Hey", Olivia soothed, „bad dream?" A muffled "hm" could be heard, as always when someone would ask Gloria a question. Olivia had to smile at that and sank onto the small couch next to the crib. Gloria let herself slide down right away until she came to lie on her side. Full of expectation she looked into her mother's eyes.
Apparently it was much easier for Peter to shake hands with the risks and Olivia suffered from the knowledge of that fact. One evening she was crouched on the sofa just like so many nights before, frustrated with herself, her brows furrowed. Peter had the impression he could see the two worlds hovering over her, how they were trying to catch the right moment, getting ready for the jump, in order to come to some final rest on Olivia's shoulders.
„We have to rescue our world as well, Livia", he said. "The world between you and me." Feeling caught she glanced back at him and permitted one single tear to escape.
"I don't wanna be the reason...", her voice broke.
"I know", Peter helped out, trying not to distress her. "Your decision won't change anything between us." He'd sworn it over a thousand times. He knew, she had sought to shield herself from any kind of love for a long, long time now. She was scared to experience loss again, who could blame her really. Rachel, Ella and he himself, even Walter, had formed a constant she could latch onto. But the amount of trust and confidence it asked from her, cost too much and was killing the thought of having even more loved ones. To her it promised trouble instead of happiness. But tonight, she was about to go further.
"I don't want to live a nihilistic life anymore." Her voice suddenly clear and steady. Peter nodded almost insensible and sat down next to her. After a while she took his hand, a permission for him to pull her close.
A rattling window and the howl of the wind woke Olivia with a start. Gloria had fallen asleep on her breast and as often, Olivia had dozed off on the sofa herself. When she had put the baby back into its bed and sleeping bag, she scuffled back into the bedroom. Her upper body felt uncomfortably cold, missing the little child cradled against it. It shone 05:53 am into her direction. Two more hours of sleep. Contented she crawled back under the covers until she came to rest against Peter's back. She wrapped one arm around him and he shuddered under her cold hand against his chest. She kissed his neck apologetically and closed her eyes. Those minutes only belonged to them, no matter how many people before had lived through similar corny ideal-world-moments.