Chapter One: "Arguing With One's Self and Rocket Launcher"
"If there is one thing that I certainly know about this world, then it is this: no matter where, when, how, or to whom, an adventure can just begin at the blink of an eye. And why wouldn't it? Without it, life would be that much boring, wouldn't it? Ha ha, YES!" – Ezreal, the Prodigal Explorer
"UGH, Fishbones, there's nothing for us to do here anymore! The City of Progress? Pft, more like the city of BORING again! Where did all of my popularity go? Why are there no more people trying to invade my playground so we can play? Where are the cops? Where are the thugs? HMF!"
"Um, well, you not being chased? Now that IS strange. It used to be so lively around here and now things really have settled down, haven't they? Hey, speaking of settling down, maybe this is where you can finally fulfill your lifelong dream of buying a house on the coast, paying bills, and living an honest life like everyone-"
"BAH, haven't we gone over that more than enough, fishbrain? That's YOUR dream! Not mine! And as we both know, my dreams come before yours soooooo… You as well as me will wreak havoc until the end of our days! You're going to be my chaos dealing machine for forever! Ha ha ha!"
"Aw but Jinx, I don't want to be your chaos dealing machine for forever! What about making some family and friends and having some peace and quiet for a change? Since you started helping that Protector goof, you've been a bit, well, lost in the clouds about the whole prospect of mayhem and chaos and-"
"No, no, no, no, NO! Why do you insist on being such a party pooper all of the time, Fishbones? Why can't you be the strong silent type like Pow-Pow?"
"Pow-Pow is strong and silent?! Tell that to all of the pests you've scared off with him in Piltover's slums for the last few months! Bah-hah, if he's the silent type then, yeah, I'm actually a freaking squirt gun and you're a nun of Demacia-"
"Shut it, rust bucket! You owe me so much you know! I created you, remember? Thus, I own you and I've even carried you everywhere since without asking for hardly anything in return!"
"I didn't ask you to make me… And besides, you adore the fact that you have to carry me around everywhere you go. Without me, you wouldn't ever have had any explosive fun. Without me, you wouldn't have ever gotten the appropriate exercise that has made as well as kept you looking like the cute, skinny, petite, enticing, crazy, little touched in the head citizen of Runeterra that you are today-"
"Gosh golly, Fishbones, cram your trap shut! You can be SO obnoxious sometimes!"
"Says the girl who takes every compliment as an insult. Says the girl who takes pleasure in blowing up things. Says the girl who doesn't know or will ever know what to do with herself-"
"What are you mumbling about?"
"NOTHING! Nothing at all."
"Then if you're grumbling about nothing, why are you shaking? Aw, are you afraid of me dismantling you? Don't be. You can stop shaking."
"I'm not afraid and I'm not shaking. You're making me shake on purpose, in fact. So stop it. STOP!"
"Oh Fishbones, heh heh, you're so easy to tease! Just like this city used to be. Nowadays though, things just aren't the same… Why isn't it as easy to make everyone panic, to make them chase after me, to make them want the summoners of whatever order to summon me to wherever field where I can REALLY have a fun time? BAH, I'm so freaking bored, Fishbones!"
For the northeastern City of Progress of Runeterra, "Piltover", the day in question was Friday. As for the exact date itself, it was October 19th with the weather beginning to shift from what had once been the warm summer season to the colorful autumn. Put simply, for all of Runeterra, it was still comfortable outside during sunlight's hours, yet chilly during moonlight's.
Indeed, as sad as it was for most throughout the presently quiet techmaturgy city softly illuminated against the shadows by yordle genius "Heimerdinger's" star rods, as the clock tower in popular Diamond Square began to toll its usual eleven times to signify it was 11:00pm into the nighttime, the warm days of summer were becoming scarcer in number. Instead, even with the sun out and about, the chilliness of winter's gradual coming was obviously intensifying.
As of late, the various colored leaves upon trees had started rapidly falling from their appropriate tree limbs, Piltovians alike had taken to staying indoors to stay content with themselves, and as for the nights… well, brr, those dark hours were the clearest of signs that old man winter's chilly reign would descend upon everything soon enough.
For Runeterra in general – be it Demacia, Noxus, Freljord, Piltover, Zaun, the rune scarred southern regions beyond the Great Barrier even – every passing day was getting noticeably shorter. Whether it was accepted or not, the half of the year where daytime had the shorter end of the stick and nighttime had the longer was upon everyone's doorstep. As the warmth in the air was dropping, farmers were putting away their livestock along with equipment, sailors were toughening themselves, families had taken to cuddling around the fireplace, and every army anywhere had bolstered itself for the coming freezing snows.
Still, refocusing onto the technological City of Progress, the Piltovians had always considered themselves quite suited for the comings as well as goings of seasons. With their insulated housing, gas lines, plumbing, oil lamps, hextech gear, plus so much more fine things founded by the ingenious minds of researchers, discoverers, and tinkerers in the past, Piltover's citizens found it more than easy nowadays to adapt to the increasingly chilly days if not nights that had arrived. If anything, feeling comfy while watching the leaves descend in torrents in the occasionally blustering winds, the advanced city took great delight in the adjustment from summer to autumn.
So nowadays, by daytime, Piltover would live in peace, prosperity, along with contentment like it had always done. By nighttime, as the sun set in the western horizon, its populace would take to remaining inside where it was warm. Although, at moments, several folk would even bundle up against the nippy night atmosphere to start up bonfires in their backyards, lots, and wherever such a thing could be had. And there in the cold darkness yet warmed by the dancing flames, friends along with families would gather around those fires to chat, to laugh, to predict how bad the winter weather would be this certain year.
Yet, in the southern region of the City of Progress, across the historical "Herald Bridge" that reached across the wide "Posei River" to connect both north and south Piltover, there was a certain girl who had no fire to enjoy, no "real" friends to laugh with, and most definitely – or so she liked to tell herself – had no intention of ever doing such a thing as settle down like the many Piltovians whom enjoyed the current late nighttime. Unlike everyone else too, she didn't burden herself with heavy clothing against the supposedly cold weather. Instead, spinning one of the two longer than long braids of blue hair trailing from her head, she took great pleasure in not being warm – in not being like everyone else in the boring world – by barely wearing anything at all.
For very good reason, since she had shown herself to the tranquil community of Piltover nearly three months ago with quite the bang, "Jinx the Loose Cannon" had never been normal in the eyes of anyone. Heh, since the day she had been born at whatever place due to whomever, she herself knew she hadn't been normal. No, not many like she had decided their lifelong dream would be in creating panic, causing chaos, and just breaking rules because rules were made specifically to be broken.
Rules were just limitations, after all. They were simply obstacles. Something that got in one's way. Like buildings… or, ha, people at times.
Really, as it had forever been in the mind of the Loose Cannon, who wanted to be normal? Who didn't want to go on a rampage every so often? Who didn't think it was cool that she had blown up one of Piltover's most secure vaults back in the day as well as escaped the city's finest in the same night without taking a speck of gold?
Blah, who wanted to pay bills, to be within the limits of the law, to be like everyone else? Not this gal! Nuh-uh! Plus, ignoring the chilly breeze that came every so often tonight, was her outfit – a lightweight kind of bikini/vest with stockings and boots rimmed with bullets – not the most attractive outfit ever? Was it not honestly badass of her to be showing so much skin against the chilly air? To keep being a bad girl? Yeah, she was pretty awesome.
By past personal experience, after having had her own romantic entanglements across Runeterra leading up to this very minute, Jinx knew just how many a guy would agree with her that she was being epic, mysterious, and hot by being so open to the cold. Whether others wanted it or didn't wanted it to be, she was aware her way of life had influence. For deep down, especially among the more organized of men, there was a craving for disorder, for unbalance, for what didn't make sense, for the complete freedom to do whatever.
And as for those few individuals that had actually thought themselves close to her before she dashed away without warning, before she was off again to be free, before she broke many a heart, Jinx had allowed them to have a brief taste of being jinxed… Of, heh, her.
Yet, it was on this certain night in question, on October 19th around 11:00, that she found she was fighting herself… over several things she never actually believed she would.
Firstly, due to what she knew already, she was bored out of her demented little mind. Secondly, she was thinking about what course of action to follow next to get over being bored; whether to remain in or depart ever so boring Piltover. Thirdly, most crucial of all… well, she was actually attempting to not be jinxed herself. Simply put, trying to elude the constant rising as well as falling of the rate of her rapidly beating heart in her small chest at the thought, she wasn't desperately trying to gain the inspiration to depart the city but a certain somebody special – no, NOT special – behind her.
Yet, that was just it.
After so many times that she had easily made others fall head over heels for her before she cruelly vanished from them without a trace, this time proved opposite for Jinx. This time… she had been jinxed by someone else. This time, no matter how much she argued with herself/Fishbones about it, she couldn't see herself simply leaving that someone behind and was downright frightened at the prospect of that same somebody maybe leaving her.
At the precise moment of her feeling conflicted about possibly being jinxed by someone other than her own self for a change, seated upon the edge of the roof of a random building of the slums that allowed her to firmly gaze across the other rooftops towards the twinkling north of the City of Progress, the Loose Cannon was currently yet animatedly discussing several serious matters with what appeared to be a… shark shaped rocket launcher that rested upon her bare left shoulder and a pink gatling-gun which was set next to her to her right?
Again, heh, Jinx was not normal in the slightest. It only made sense that she, having been a destructive psychopath for most of her life, would not have literal friends to speak of nor to.
Nah, during her years as a hectic criminal, taking to mostly being independent of anyone or anything by using this practice often, she had forever taken to speaking to her weapons, "Fishbones" the rocket launcher and "Pow-Pow" the gatling-gun, for comfort, for friendship, for whatever remained of her sanity.
Thus, seated upon the edge of the roof of whatever structure, lazily spinning one of her braids in the nippy air while her bare legs swung to and fro in the most attractive way, Jinx had been crazily arguing with her rocket launcher since the sun had set long ago. Finally, it was with the outburst of "I'M BORED" that she grumpily laid herself out on her back.
Lying there on the building's top, she gazed up at the clear, dark, yet starry heavens blessed with a full moon tonight. For her own reason, something of a contently small smile flickered across her pale expression followed by an entertained bite of her lower lip before, with much clanking, she had Fishbones impatiently clank at her from the background.
"Oh, you're bored, Jinx? I never would have guessed! If you hadn't been freaking shouting that right in my ear all night long, that is!"
Then, for the briefest moment, Jinx had Fishbones appear to be pondering over something as she grumbled for him in a deep tone, "Wait, hold on, how does that work? I don't have ears… Anyway, as always – although I'd have it differently – I'm right here at your behest. So, if you're so very lacking in something to do… why not go to the wealthy north district of town and blow up a bank?"
Raising one of her thin eyebrows that reflected a sparkle of light from her lightly crimson eyes which had driven many a figure to not be able to resist her charms, the Loose Cannon wondered back in her normal voice, "A bank, Fishbones? Seriously?"
"Yeah! If no one chases you after something like that, you'd still get your message across to everyone because you'd cause quite a financial setback for all who have deposited in its vault! With a blast from me, all of that money would go POOF and the economy would be hit hard without-"
"No. Boring. Been there done that. Yawn." The Loose Cannon yawned at her own voiced idea, making Fishbones appear to be taken aback by her lack in usual enthusiasm, "Not interested, rustbutt. Think of something else. Quick like, chop-chop!"
"I, uh, um, okay, well, hm… I GOT IT! How about we steal another tug boat like we did last month, harness it to the fanciest ships in the docks, then set them all out on a direct course out from the bay into the Guardian Sea or, basically, the middle of nowhere! Think of the frustration, the mayhem, and all of the work the cops will have to go through to get all of that property back-"
"Pass. Ahem, that was thrilling then. Not now. Too much work, too much hassle, not enough reward came out of it. Next!"
"Urgh, I, mrgh, we, hurgh… Okay, okay, okay! How about we set out looking for the guy who has been making things boring around here then?" Fishbones exclaimed, several sparks drifting from his metal maw into the shadows in the meantime, "No, not those two losers who are supposedly this boring city's finest but the guy who stole your tin monkey toy, who drove away all of those thugs that kept coming after you, who has made this city so boring again!"
"Go and hunt down Mr. I can do anything and take away all of your fun in the process?" Jinx tittered to herself, carefully thinking of the certain stranger she had come to know, despise, yet consider fun for the past few months, "Fishbones… Ugh, you know I'm looking for a fun time, not a challenge."
"A challenge?" Fishbones clanked back, chuckling to himself, "Pft, it wouldn't be a challenge if you hadn't let your guard down around him, if you hadn't come to like having him around, if you hadn't let him snatch your tin monkey, Mojo, from your pocket and claim you wouldn't see it again if you didn't promise to behave, to aid him, to help each other find some higher purpose, to make this place so very unbearably lacking in things to do and make you even question if you should leave or not tonight-"
"CRAM A HAM IN IT, FISHBONES!" Jinxed roared, sweeping her bangs out of her red face while trying to act like she didn't know why the City of Progress was so quiet nowadays, "AUGH, DON'T YOU START BLAMING ME FOR THINGS BEING SO QUIET AND PEACEFUL AROUND HERE! DON'T YOU DARE!"
"I wasn't blaming you, Jinx… Especially not you." The rocket launcher clunked back, a puff of powder falling from his maw meanwhile, "I'm just saying that if you continue to sit here arguing over nothing while twiddling your thumbs and spinning your braids, we might as well be in a house on the coast paying bills and living a normal life. That or you need to leave this city right now. I mean, if you can't rampage in this place then find another to wreak havoc upon. Reclaim your freedom again. Move on. You've done it dozens of times before."
"Not without Mojo. We can't go without poor little Mojo." Jinx argued to herself, actually feeling her heart might very well literally be experiencing a bit of regret at the thought of leaving this boring city behind, of leaving a certain guy behind.
"Oh forget that tin monkey already and let's just go back to Zaun!" Fishbones growled, acting out the frustrated part of Jinx that was telling her that she needed to make a choice tonight or just quit fooling herself about the truth and admit she was jinxed, "Let's go back to interfering with the work of mad scientists, blowing up thief guilds, interrupting dark magic groups-"
"Nope."
"Uh… No?"
"Nope. If you ever took the time to notice, I'm the one with legs, Fishbones. Something you can't say you have." The Loose Cannon stated, giving her rocket launcher her most humored face, "So, as it's always been, we will be going where I decide… and before we go anywhere to get away from this place, Mojo has to be rescued!"
"Meh, that tin monkey doesn't mean that much to you, Loose Cannon. He who holds him hostage does though… doesn't he?"
At this proclamation from herself to herself in a sense, Jinx showed actual shock at Fishbones.
Her red eyes narrowed at the rocket launcher next as she voiced for him, saying what her heart – not her mind nor gut – was actually intent on doing tonight, "Yeah, you're lying to yourself. You've been lying to yourself. If you go to save Mojo tonight, you won't. Nah, you'll go because, for the hundredth time, you want to see he who's been holding your leash, he who's been in control of your playground for the last few months, and perhaps ask him about something more personal-"
"He doesn't have me by any leash or anything, Fishbones!" The Loose Cannon argued with herself, having stopped twirling her braid to focus on what was being discussed at the moment, "Stop talking! You don't know-"
"We'reonlygoing," Jinx rapidly cut across herself, suddenly shoving Fishbones into her confused expression as she mumbled in his voice, "tosupposedlysaveMojobecauseyouwanttoseethatguyaga inbecauseeachtimeyoudoyourheartgoesallaflutterandy ourfacereddensandyourbrainburnsoutandallyouendupdo ingissighing,swooning,andcursingyourselflater! Hah, I said it! I said – Mmph!"
"That's it! You're on a timeout, Fishbones!" Jinx exclaimed while shutting the rocket launcher's maw, absolutely terrified but a bit relieved also to feel her heart go a flutter at what had just been revealed by, well, herself, "Now shut up and let me see about entertaining myself! Ugh, I swear, one of these days… I'm going to REPLACE you!"
"That threat is so VERY old, Jinx. You're never going to replace me." Fishbones clanked back, actually seeming to snicker on his own too, "I'm your chaos dealing machine, remember? Forever and always, you're going to need me. Especially tonight. In order to get Mojo back, I might just have to blow a certain someone… apart for you, won't I?"
Jinx didn't reply to what had been said right off. Instead, with a growing sense of dread, now quite flustered over what was being debated, she had gotten to her feet.
What exactly was it that she was having difficulty in getting over tonight? Was it really over how peaceful everything was? Was it truly about everything being so boring? Or was it, as Fishbones had just spouted in a torrent of words and would seem so very clear to another soul… about something far more tedious; far more personal?
"We've held our part of the bargain with him, haven't we?" The Loose Cannon questioned aloud, glancing at her rocket launcher curiously, "We've done our part in helping him seeking a so called higher purpose, right?"
"Yeah." Fishbones said in turn, "He's where he wants to be. Therefore, he has no more right in keeping Mojo locked up. He has no more right in expecting us to stick around anymore. We owe him nothing else. If anything, he owes us plenty. In the least, he owes us your tin monkey back and cannot deny you your freedom any longer."
There on the roof, her braids fluttering in the cold wind, preparing herself for what could very well turn out to be the hardest thing for her to do or maybe the best decision she would ever make in her very rushed life, Jinx holstered Fishbones as well as Pow-Pow back over her shoulders.
When her weapons were nice and secure, the Loose Cannon resolutely chortled to her most unpredictable self, "Yeah, Augus… Fishbones is right. Here and now, you owe me Mojo back. Not only that, you owe me big time for everything."
Then, when she was running to leap onto the next nearby rooftop to purposefully head east, she went on to laugh to herself, "It's been fun, Augus. Blowing up stuff, taking names, roughing up the bullies on our playground, it really has been a blast… But our fun has to end. I need Mojo back. And then I need to be the Loose Cannon again. Emphasis on the loose, mind."
Yet, when she lazily if not fearlessly jumped the good few feet over the high gap of open air to the next rooftop and smoothly landed to go on roof jumping, did Jinx really mean what she had said about this "Augus" fellow? Or, like her darling Fishbones had recently quoted, was she only lying to herself some more?
Could Jinx really overcome being jinxed herself? Could she really say goodbye to he who had turned her world upside down when all of her had been so against the idea from the start?
Well, there was only one way for the Loose Cannon to find out, wasn't there?
No matter how challenging the task would be, if she wanted to be loose again – which she certainly did – then she had to retrieve Mojo from where he was being held… and not dare look back once she had completed the task. For if she did look back, if she did hesitate, she would risk starting something she wouldn't know how to possibly get away from let alone endure; that complicated little yet massive thing known as love.
End of "Arguing With One's Self and Rocket Launcher"…