Illusion
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Disclaimer: If I owned Death Note, Near would have died. Well, he did die in Deleted Scene two, but I don't consider that cannon. Near's cool enough to die, right?! All the cool characters died. He needed to die too. You can't just do it half way!! MAKE ALL THE MAIN CHARACTERS DIE!
Summary: Near discovers something. Ambiguous and general "what?"-ness, so be forewarned. Experimental writing style.
Note: I was subtly experimenting with writing style, spurred of a role-player I really admire's style. Not her style, exactly, but has sort of the same feel, I think. Yeah, basically, I wrote this because I wanted to experiment with style. Sorry for the shortness. ;D
Warning! Angst and general insanity. No swears, though, that's an accomplishment for me. –chuckles quietly- Maybe I should add one in there, just 'cause I can? Nah, I want something I write to be K+ rated. Even my role-play posts usually have a swear or "mature themes" :3
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Near was staring blankly at the light gray wall in the playroom, his army of toy soldiers forgotten beside him, the room abandoned. He was most likely in a trance or a daze—more often than not he wasn't blankly staring at the wall, more likely playing with his toys or puzzles—and his gray eyes were disconcertingly glazed over.
It was around 4 o'clock in the morning, the prime reason that there weren't any other children in the playroom (the other being that Near was always there—and, let's face it, Near's lack of emotion is slightly disturbing, to say the least). Near was suffering from the woes of insomnia, yet again. He didn't care; however, he didn't acknowledge it either. Maybe he wasn't even aware of it—it wouldn't be a surprise to anyone if he wasn't, as it was almost as if his absurd intelligence left no room in his brain for any thoughts or feeling other than things that will aid him in solving something.
He was just a shell, he really was. Not a person. Not human…incapable of doing things that humans do. Near didn't even know he was so…so different. He didn't know that he was nothing.
But, on that night—or, rather, morning—he did. It hit him. He realized that he wasn't like the others…it was some sort of outer body experience, he decided later on—because how can you be aware that you're not aware of anything?
Near felt like he was underneath a dead-weight, like the air above him had increased in density so much that it was impossible for him to breath—metaphorically speaking, of course.
At that time, he felt. It was a beautiful thing, to feel—not to him, no, but from an outsider's standpoint they might assume that it was "beautiful" for him to finally experience feeling—but painful. Oh, how painful it was…and this time, from his standpoint it was.
The albino 12 year old boy discovered something. The idea just…curled up and died inside his pitiful excuse of a functioning mind.
It's all an illusion.
Everything…it's all an illusion. Life is all an illusion…
And that's what gave Near life.
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'Nother note: I know it's short. I know it sucks. Sorry…? XD It's really ambiguous, and extremely short, and not of any quality to speak of…but I like it, kind of. :D
aequilo.xx