A/N: This is set early in season 1, and has no explanation for how it ended up in my brain.
Drunk Skye was a handful. This was no surprise to anyone on the Bus, but they were still unprepared for it. It was Coulson's birthday, and despite the fact that Coulson himself had left the party to get work done in his office hours ago, Skye was still in party mode, and determined to keep everyone else there too. She had been pushing drinks on Ward and FitzSimmons, and was unhappy that those three had the sense to pace themselves. She had tried to hand May a drink but had given up in exchange for getting her to wear a party hat.
"Okay, I wore the hat, you took a selfie with me and the hat, goodnight," May said, pulling the hat off and putting it on Skye's head, making it the third she was wearing at once. May left to mild grumbling protests from Skye until she was out of earshot.
"Truth or dare! Now, before the grown ups come back!" Skye stage whispered (drunk whispered), shoving a beer in Fitz's hand (despite his other hand holding a half full one already). She tried the same on Ward but found he was in the process of opening one already and kept it for herself.
"No, please, Skye, we are grown ups," Fitz said, shaking his head.
"Though maybe consider that adults don't usually call themselves 'grown ups,' Fitz," Ward said.
"Irregardless!" Skye said, waving her hands a little too wide, one coming close to Jemma's face. "Who's going first?"
"Why in the world would we play a kids game?" Fitz asked.
"Because it's fun?" Skye said in her "you're dumb" voice.
"Oh, remember last time we played, Fitz? It's been years! We were only a couple years out of the Academy!"
"But it always ends the same way-"
"But it was so much fun until-"
"-just too old to spend all night in the emergency room again-"
"-wasn't really her fault-"
"Good enough!" Skye interrupted. "FitzSimmons are in. Ward? My favorite supervising officer?" Skye leaned towards him with puppy dog eyes.
"...One round," Ward said. "One."
"Yessss!" Skye crowed. "Simmons, you ask Fitz first, then Fitz asks Ward, then Ward asks me, then I ask Simmons."
"But I don't want to-" Fitz started to protest.
Jemma rolled her eyes and said, "Oh Fitz, it'll be fine! Now, truth or dare?"
He sighed and said, "Dare, I guess."
She sat in silence for a moment, glancing around the room for inspiration.
"Oh, I know!" Simmons said. "Take Agent May's Tai Chi mat from her room."
"What? No! It's Agent May!" Fitz whined.
"You've done much harder dares!" she said with a scoff.
"Fine," Fitz said, reaching for his tablet. "Let's keep playing while I set up. Truth or dare, Ward?"
"Dare."
Fitz thought for a moment. An evil look took over his eyes. "Simmons and Skye get to give you a full face of makeup when the game is done."
The girls both let out a sound between a cackle and a squeal and then dissolved in giggles.
"That's mean," Ward said, looking a little hurt.
"I was going to tell you to take a picture of it and submit it next time you need to update your badge, too," Fitz said with a smirk.
"I forgot how… creative you get with this game," Simmons said to her partner, laughing a little.
"I didn't even want to play. Could you enter the password to adjust the life support and airflow systems on my tablet here, please?" Fitz asked Simmons, handing her his tablet.
"My tuuuurn!" Skye said, slapping her hand down on the table and turning to Ward. "I pick truth," she said before he could ask.
"What is… uh… what… What was your most embarrassing memory at school?" Ward asked sheepishly.
"That's terrible," Fitz said, shaking his head. "You should have asked her the most illegal hack she did, other than SHIELD, or the worst date she went on."
"How are you so good at this game?" Ward asked, surprise on his face.
"I didn't even want to play!" Fitz grumbled. "Simmons, are these the correct wave frequencies to encourage the brain to stay asleep?" he tipped his tablet towards her and she made some minor adjustments on the screen and turned back to hear Skye's answer.
"My most embarrassing moment at school was when I walked into a door, and then fell down an entire flight of stairs because I was staring at the hot Spanish teacher," Skye said. "Yeah, that was kind of cliche. The question and the answer." She turned to Simmons. "Truth or dare?"
"Um, dare," she said with a smile.
Ward was intermittently taking sips of his beer to avoid looking embarrassed about being so bad at the game. That's why he ended up spluttering and choking when Skye shrieked "FitzSimmons kiss!" as soon as Simmons had gotten out the A of "dare".
"Skye, you can't-" Ward started, choking and turning very red (for many reasons at this point).
"Just kiss?" Simmons asked.
"Yes...?" Skye said.
"Not snog in a corner, or kiss for a specific amount of time, or anything?" Simmons asked again.
"No?" Skye said. "Should I be-"
But before Skye could finish, and without any hesitation, the pair of scientists leaned towards each other and kissed, for a good three seconds. And then they settled back into their seats, looking calm, normal, and entirely unaffected.
There was no noise but Grant Ward's attempts to clear his throat.
"But… what?" Skye finally asked, looking confused.
"What's that, Skye?" Simmons asked. When Skye just stared at her and Fitz, mouth moving but no words coming out, Simmons turned to Fitz and asked, "How's your plan to get the mat coming, Fitz?"
"That depends. How sure are you of the invisibility suit prototype?" Fitz asked, not looking up from his tablet.
"Um, about 85% sure," Simmons said.
"Close enough," Fitz said, getting up to retrieve the suit. He returned a few minutes later, invisible below the neck. The other three followed him to outside May's door.
"What's your plan here, Fitz?" Ward asked in a whisper, watching the floating head set up his tablet outside the door.
"I changed the airflow concentrations and temperature in Agent May's bunk to promote sleep, and my tablet will play white noise at frequencies that encourage the brain's sleep state. After a few minutes, I slip in, invisibly, and take the mat."
"That's… elaborate," Skye whispered.
"I didn't even want to play!" Fitz hissed back, pulling on the mask of the invisibility suit.
After a few moments, he crept to the door, opened it quietly, and slipped into the room. He tip-toed over to the rolled up mat, reaching with invisible fingers for it.
With no warning whatsoever, May sat up in bed, looked right at Fitz, and said, "Just put it back before I get up," rolled over, and was silent. Fitz grabbed the mat and bolted out of the room and down the hall, ripping off the mask as he did. The other followed him.
"What happened?" Simmons asked, putting a hand out and feeling around until she found his invisible arm.
"She sat up, looked right at me - invisible me - and said 'Just put it back before I get up,'" he said.
"Even with all those extra measures, she still woke up?" Skye said.
"But I got the mat!" Fitz said, holding it up proudly.
"Your turn, Ward," Skye said. She and Jemma skipped off to grab their makeup.
/** * **/
"Tell me how this happened," Coulson said, staring down FitzSimmons and Skye in the waiting room outside the ER.
"We were putting makeup on Ward," Skye said, "and he had an allergic reaction."
"I tried to stop the reaction, but it was more than I could control," Simmons said, looking guilty. "And I didn't feel confident trying more extreme measures after drinking."
"You made the right choice, Simmons, you still seem a little intoxicated. But why were you putting makeup on Agent Ward?" Coulson said, bringing a hand to rub across his forehead.
"I dared him, sir," Fitz said, looking half guilty, half indignant.
"Why?"
All three broke out talking at once.
"It was my idea, I wanted to play-"
"I should have insisted we test the makeup on a small area first-"
"Truth or Dare always ends in the emergency department, every time-"
"Okay!" Coulson said over them. "Never mind. What happened, happened. I'll go check on him."
Coulson walked away, and Fitz got up a few seconds after.
"I'm getting coffee, either of you want anything?"
Skye shook her head no and Simmons asked for a coffee as well. Fitz walked off in search of caffeine. Once he was out of sight, Skye turned to her friend.
"Can I ask you something?"
"Of course, Skye!"
"How can you kiss someone like that and have absolutely no response to it at all?"
"Oh Skye, Fitz and I have played Truth or Dare together tons of times."
"...So?" Skye asked.
"So, every time we play Truth or Dare, one of us is always dared to kiss the other. Every time! And then, somehow, the game usually ends in the emergency department. Actually, now that I think about it, it always ends in the emergency department. Maybe Fitz is right, we really shouldn't play this any more."
Skye sat quietly for a second, then asked, "So, to clarify, you guys have kissed before?"
"Well, yes. So this round was nothing new to us."
"You guys have kissed before?"
/** * **/
A/N: This is the first thing I've written (and completed) since 2011. I hope it was enjoyed :)