I have tried in earnest to put the matter out of mind, yet it seems, to my deepest chagrin, that my efforts are in vain. My nights are long and sleepless, my comfort disturbed. I toss and turn endlessly just waiting for dawn, or a release from this torment. The maids have offered all kinds of tea to soothe my nerves, but the leaves come from Anuenue and I don't believe I can bear to touch them. For now, all I can do is to rely upon my patience and upon my queen's good sense.

Though, I do say, the dreadful premonitions that come to me in the night are most unnerving. Within my mind's eye, quite often I see her impoverished on the streets, or lost hopelessly in a city... I imagine her wandering here and there, calling out to me as she used to... Of course, those times are many years past. But in several ways my queen is yet very much a child. Her nature is gentle and open, but too often she is partial in her consideration. She is quite stubborn and single-minded, and she cannot, it seems, grasp the extent of her duty to her country. Obviously, the last trespass pains me most of all.

I am wont to take the responsibility as my own; after all, I raised her. I tried to shape her into a fine young woman worthy of her nation, and in some ways I succeeded. Yet in other terrible ways, I have failed. This thought distresses me beyond words.

Now there is no longer anything I can do. Somehow the power has slipped from my hands. Granted, other responsibilities have been bestowed upon me — dealing with palace affairs is not something I am unused to — but I believe that my queen's wellbeing should be my principal concern. I have sent the three witches out to find her already. I am not prepared for the confrontation I shall have to make on the day they return, but I can't allow this misfortune to continue any longer.

Recent circumstances have created so many difficulties for us that our relationship has become something foreign. It feels as though I'm talking to an outsider when we are together; it is painful for me to see her this way. I think back to when she took her first step towards the outside world, and the naivety she possessed. I think of her return. Of course it pleased me to see her, but I recognized immediately a new light in her eyes. I had the strange feeling that she'd been to the other side of the universe.

But that is foolishness. Clearly my queen had just been overwhelmed. I was ready to welcome her back to the throne, as were the servants and citizens, so we were fastidious in our arrangements. The kitchens in the lower levels of the palace were the busiest I've ever seen them and the cleaning staff was nearly in a panic. As the head of estate in my queen's stead, I was to ensure that she be duly satisfied upon her return. Workers remained in her room for days, changing furniture, re-icing the floors, smoothing over the imperfections on her walls. I oversaw these as well as various other activities in Cursa.

It was nearing the end of spring when my queen returned. The three witches and I traveled to Mira to see off the young man's Guardian Spirit, though the four of us and the people of Wazn knew what would truly take place. Though I never told her majesty, I possessed the knowledge that she would return upon releasing the Ocean. I didn't feel it was necessary to tell her, and besides, I believed that such an experience would allow her to cherish life and country even more.

She was allowed to spend a few days in the company of her friends before we decided to return home. I left a skilled chef in charge of Kaffaljidhma, and though his leadership skills are superb, I worried that the ice sculptors might not pay him any mind. They were to work on renovations around the castle for the queen's sake; these stray citizens were by no means long-term employees. It is important to develop trust in order to lead, and that is what the workers and the chef did not have.

We brought the queen back to the refurbished castle and allowed her to rest, as I firmly believed that after such a long journey, she must have wanted to take the time to reestablish her place there. The citizens of Wazn received her joyously. She, for her part, seemed glad to see them as well, though she never went into the city for long.

I will take the time here to say that she did seem to have changed in her manner and appearance. Her skin had darkened some, although she had always been a pale child, and she no longer wore the pink outfit from before. Instead she donned the robes of a witch, like the ones I wear, but when I questioned her about the change she never answered me. At first I felt as though she regarded me as a stranger; I began to feel disconcerted. She eventually resumed her old treatment of me, taking the time to converse about daily events and seek my advice, but she continued to keep her real thoughts hidden; I noticed that she never spoke of her journey to me and relied more and more on the foreigners who had begun to trickle in.

But her behavior wasn't extreme enough to cause discord between us. She didn't seem to notice that she had changed, and I wasn't about to disturb the peace.