A/N: I changed Levi's age a slight bit, he's 4 years younger than he was canon. I just have a hard time paring him and Eren at their canon ages so yea...sorry haha

Also, I have no beta so I apologize for any mistakes! OTL

Warnings: prostitution, drug use, mentioned character death, sexiness, Levi's mouth(it's dirt guys, really dirty), and Erwin's a manipulative little shit. with a big dick.

~X~

When the war ended, humanity celebrated. The walls were ripped down, the corrupted government crumbled, and the villages expanded far out beyond the eye could see. It was glorious. Parents felt safe to bring their newborn children into a world free of monsters that feasted on human flesh and a new generation of humanity ushered in the new age.

War heroes were given generous retirement packages and honorable medals and then released out into the new civilization to do as they pleased. But not Eren. Hanji got promoted to a top-tier researcher for humankind, Erwin became head of the Military Police, and Levi opened a dojo specializing in the art of double swords. Everyone moved on. But not Eren.

How could he when Mikasa had died, knowingly throwing herself in front of a fatal blow to protect him of all people? How could he when Armin had lost both his legs, fractured in a titans grip in so many places they were forced to amputate or risk a deathly disease seeping into the blonde's wracked body? The answer was he couldn't. The answer was that he hadn't expected to live past the war in the first place. Now that he had, he didn't know what to do with himself. There was no one left for him besides Armin and the doctors said he would barely last a few months if they were being hopeful.

When Armin finally let go of life, too tired and too heart-broken to keep holding on, it was a relief. Eren had spent as much time with him as he could but it was hard to look into someone's eyes when they were delirious and clouded over from pain and he was perfectly fine due to his monstrous regenerating capabilities. Armin, Mikasa, Sasha, Connie—everyone—had thrown themselves into the line of fire, running straight into the front lines of a seemingly hopeless battle knowing they could and probably would die or at the very least sustain horrible disfiguring injuries. But Eren was different. No matter what, he simply regenerated. His limbs grew back like it was nothing, scratches mended, bruises dissipated, and bones snapped back together. It was excruciating and agonizing and he had more injuries than everyone else in his squad put together, but at least his body grew back.

It was easy to jump into the fire when you knew you couldn't be burned.

Eren wished things could have ended differently, but they didn't, and the victory for him was a double edged sword. When everyone else was set free, he had been stomped down. A monster doesn't get a retirement plan. His retirement plan had been death in battle, or as a last resort by Levi's hands, but even that was taken away from him. The man had refused, it was no longer necessary.

So Eren lived a conflicted life, because hadn't he said he was going to eliminate all the titans? Hadn't he said he was going to exterminate every last one? And yet, here he was, a living, breathing, moving titan.

So Eren forgot.

He made himself forget.

With alcohol, with sex, with drugs.

He began to crave the sensual sensation of fireworks zipping through his veins, setting his body on fire and melting his mind. At first it was just this once and then it was just a few more times and then before he knew it it was a raging madness searing within him. It was a need, an incorrigible craving endlessly tormenting him. It was never enough.

It was like falling asleep on a deserted beach, slowly becoming surrounded by water as it trickled through his toes, around his arms, above his head. A maddeningly slow descent into the depths of the ocean until by the time that you noticed you were drowning, you were already fifty feet below the sea and the tide had risen to the point that it was impossible to find your way back.

And It was dark below the water, it was hard to breath. Every gasping inhale was like having his lungs carved out and replaced with solid weights, only dragging him farther down. Eren panicked, thrashing and flailing, trying to swim back up, but he only sank faster. So he stopped. He realized it was too late, and he had always had a death wish anyways. Giving up was easy.

So he picked up the needle once again.

And he was gone.

~X~

And that's where his corporal found him, prostituting himself in an alleyway in order to make money so that he could feel that sinking feeling again, again, again. He needed to drown to live, and Eren quickly found out that when he was numb it didn't really matter what happened to his body. It's not like he felt it, what with his mind melting and his brain so far disconnected he could barely remember his own name, much less that he should probably care that this was degrading or dehumanizing or self-destructive.

He was a nineteen year old man in the body of an inhuman boy, a decaying war hero beyond his peak, and he was a mindless prostitute.

Half the time he couldn't even remember what his own face looked like, but he always always always remembered how much it would cost for him to buy his next hit and he always always always remembered where to get the good stuff.

But sometimes forgetting got him in trouble.

The faces blended into one another and became one big mangled face and he didn't mind the distortion when it helped him dissociate from all the men abusing his body, but he minded when he couldn't tell the difference between those men and his corporal. Although he didn't know it at the time, when he woke up the next morning in a pristine white bed in the cleanest room he'd been in since before the scouting legion had been disbanded with a stabbing headache, intolerable nausea, and his entire body feeling like he was hit with a semi, he solemnly decided that he had probably made a mistake.

Getting up on shaky legs, he promptly vomited his guts out in the toilet, washed his face off, and carefully descended the staircase next to his room into what appeared to be a dojo. There were students practicing in various parts of the room, using wooden swords to challenge each other, and it made Eren feel incredibly old when he realized he was capable of disarming all of them quite easily had that been his intention.

Leaning against the wall in attempt to help him stay standing Eren realized that he was suffering from withdrawals. He needed to find his dealer, and fast, because this was going to be extraordinarily painful and probably terribly humiliating if he didn't. Scanning the room, the brunette tried figuring out where he was and why on earth he was here instead of the streets which had become his home for the past few years. It was somewhat hard to make his brain work at the moment though, everything was hazy and disjointed, but then he caught a glimpse of a somewhat familiar face from the corner of his eyes and turned to see a very bored looking Levi staring at him with a penetrating look in his eyes from his seated position across the room.

And oh.

That was most likely a very not good thing, especially considering how he knew he had been walking the streets last night trying to make money. Though he didn't remember ever seeing the sassy corporal, that didn't account for much. He knew he had been out of his mind last night on a pretty intense high and blackouts were a fairly common occurrence when he was like that.

Eren would have tried to sneak out at this point but upon scouring the room for exits he found that there was only one door and it led into what appeared to be a backyard. Also, this door was unfortunately placed all the way on the other side of the dojo and with all the students in the way Levi would probably get there before he did. The inherent instability his legs appeared to have adopted for the moment was definitely not helping. So, after a heavy sigh and a prominent gulp he turned his eyes to look back at his commander, who happened to still be staring straight at him.

A younger Eren would have blushed but he really didn't have much dignity left at this point. The brunette had been stared at before by much more intimidating people and in much more embarrassing situations. So he simply murmured a quiet, 'fuck it' under his breath and hobbled his way over to where Levi was sitting.

Upon reaching the man, Eren fell down to his knees, already tired from his walk down the stairs and over to the corner of the dojo.

"Sir," he said in greeting, eyes glued to the floor at the man's feet in slight shame. He realized at this point that while the man could have very well seen him simply passed out or walking around, with Eren's luck, the brunette had probably propositioned him unknowingly. Which was quite embarrassing for multiple reasons. One, he had probably been really fucked up, as in really fucked up. Two, he hadn't even recognized the older man. Three, the things he had probably said while trying to convince the man to purchase him were unfortunately terribly whorish, if his past encounters with johns were anything to go by.

Although he wasn't sure any of this had happened, it was probably safe to assume the worst. And while he was thankful for the warm bed and the roof over his head for the night, he still really needed to leave. Withdrawals weren't his thing and he didn't plan on sticking around long enough to be forced into them.

Looking back up at the ravenette who still had yet to acknowledge him besides a delicately arched eyebrow Eren managed through his splitting headache to thank him for his hospitality and then attempt to excuse himself from the situation.

Instead of the 'whatever' he was expecting, the man sarcastically asked him if he was actually capable of walking at that moment and if he really wanted to leave right now? And come on Eren, it's eight in the morning, it's a little early for drugs don't you think? Which made Eren jump slightly because how had he known that's the brunette needed to leave for? He hadn't thought he was that obvious and his stomach twisted at the thought that every person in the room had most likely heard that. But when he whipped his head around—really not a good idea considering it almost made him puke all over the clean-freak's sparkling floor—he found that not a single head was turned their way.

Breathing out a sigh of relief through his nose Eren looked back around and searched the ravenette's face before letting out a weak, "Please, Corporal?"

The man seemed to flinch slightly, and Eren wondered what that was about. before responding with a stern, "I'm not your Corporal anymore Eren. The war is over."

But Eren didn't think so. The war had never ended for him. It may have switched to a new battlefield but he was always at war. He'd never not been at war, he didn't know what that was like, didn't know how to act when he wasn't fighting. That was all he'd ever been good at. He knew the grip of a sword, the angle to tilt a blade for the most effective hit, the trajectory he needed to aim his 3D maneuver gear in order to not slam into a wall or a tree or into a titan's mouth. He knew what it felt like to be covered in his comrades blood, to be inside a titan's stomach as acid slowly ate away at the bodies around him, to be on his back, legs spread, with a man pounding into him sweaty and unprepared.

Eren knew war.

What he didn't know was how to get out of this situation. He didn't know how to deal with people, especially this person. How do you say, 'Sorry I begged you to pay for my body, I just wanted to shoot up again so bad,' to someone you looked up to, respected even? How was he supposed to say that without completely disgracing himself in front of the only person left in this world that mattered to him? If this was Hanji or Erwin or any of the other soldiers who still happened to be alive—it was a short list—then he would have easily said all that and then just left. But with Levi...he couldn't.

So he said nothing and in his shame, he stood to leave. And Levi let him.

In a perfect world the older man would have stopped him, but this world was not perfect. This was not a fairytale, and this world was unnecessarily cruel and painfully unforgiving.

~X~

The next time he saw the man was almost half a year later. Half a year, hundreds of johns, and pounds of liquid heaven later. Eren was twenty now and he thinks Levi was probably about thirty-four if he remembers correctly. This time they met in a bar instead of the streets and Eren not quite as fucked up.

Ever since the incident a few months ago where he woke up in the ravenette's house he'd been trying to get clean. It hasn't worked as well as he would have hoped, but he's at least at the point that when he sees Levi he recognizes him. The brunette almost wants to dash out of the bar and hope he hasn't been spotted but he forces himself to maintain his ground. Maybe the man won't even see him, he thinks. It is dark in the room and there is an immense amount of people. It's really more of a club than anything.

He's also hoping that the older man is drunk, seeing as they are in a bar, and therefor maybe Levi won't recognize him this time. Almost everyone here is on something, after all. And most of them are looking for a quick fuck. Which brings up why Eren is here, that is, to offer his 'services' if anyone can afford them or has the right drugs to trade him with.

It's not a glamorous job, but it's better than when he was on the streets. At least he's pickier with who he lets buy him. Sometimes he even likes it. Really, Eren muses sarcastically, he's moving up in the world.

A few minutes after spotting Levi, and then promptly losing him in the crowd, he sees him again, this time with Erwin. The brunette wonders if the two are together or together. They could just be here as friends, wingmen even. Or they could be here as lovers. Eren doesn't even know if the two fighters are gay though. In fact, he was almost certain Erwin was straight. He'd actually thought Erwin was dating Hanji. But to be honest, the brunette hadn't been paying that much attention back then, what with the war and people dying and all, so he could have been wrong. For some reason it still hurts a little though, to see Erwin and Levi together.

Eren hadn't even known he liked the corporal like that, but here he was getting just the tiniest bit jealous, so who knows. It could just be the alcohol and other things running through his system making him feel like that though. In combination with his raging depression and suicidal tendencies, thoughts like this weren't all that uncommon for him and he found himself wondering if he actually wanted Levi or if he was just wanting someone to be there. It was only human to want affection, he supposed.

But then he scoffed at himself, look at him sitting here thinking he was human, thinking someone like Levi could like someone like him. He was a monster, a disgrace. He was filthy, and Levi was all about cleanliness. How ridiculous a notion it was for a man of that quality to like a man of Eren's 'quality'. A hero and a whore. Ridiculous.

These thoughts really weren't helping though, so Eren quickly ordered another shot and downed it before getting up and walking in the opposite direction he had just seen the two other men in. Unfortunately, he should have known his luck wouldn't allow him to have his way, and just before he reached the exit he walked straight into Erwin's back which had suddenly appeared out of nowhere.

"Fucking shit," he cursed, rubbing his nose a little to alleviate the pain. He felt like he had just walked into a brick wall, with how built the blonde man was.

The taller man quickly turned around to apologize and ended up staring right at Eren, and then Levi popped out from behind him asking what had happened, and the brunette knew he was fucked.

He was just going to walk away and try to lose them in the crowd but when he backed up he ran into another man who upon seeing his face had smirked widely and said, "Well, hello there, sweetie! Up for another round tonight? I've got just the thing you've been looking for."

The brunette recognized him as the man who had traded him his drug of choice in exchange for his body a few nights ago. He really wanted to go with this man because the guy really did have exactly what he was looking for, it was good quality and he even tipped him a little extra if Eren went a second round.

But then he remembered who exactly was watching as this guy felt up his body and offered him such sweet temptations and though it was so very difficult to turn the man down he forced himself to say no. He probably could have been a little nicer and simply said not tonight, but he elbowed the John in the gut and pushed himself away snarling. He should have ended at that, but he was still an addict after all, so he pulled the guy back and whispered in his ear, "Maybe next time honey. I'll even give you an extra treat for waiting, hmm?"

The guy smirked and said a little too loudly for Eren's taste, "Fine, babe. I knew you liked it rough. That's pretty sexy, you better put those claws away when I'm fucking you though," before smacking his ass and walking away.

This all left Eren standing pretty awkwardly in front of his two greatest heroes in an outfit that was probably too skimpy to be considered respectful. He was pretty sure his eyes were sufficiently glazed over as well, it wasn't like he had come here sober after all, and that was not his first guy of the night. The two older men looked like they knew exactly what was going on so he didn't even try to play it off and just jumped straight into the next topic which unfortunately for him was, "So...you two here together or what?"

And fuck, he never was very good at keeping his mouth shut.

Thankfully neither seemed too offended, but Erwin did laugh a little before telling him that no, they weren't. His heart jumped a little at that but quickly tempered back down when the blonde then proceeded to ask him 'how much?' At first Eren thought he was asking his own prices, which was a little disturbing since it was Erwin, and he blanched.

But then Levi spoke up and snarkily said, "Your shirt, dipshit."

Which he then replied with the very distinguished answer of, "Eh?"

And the blonde must have taken pity on him because he point at a large stain and said, "You must have spilled your drink when you ran into me. Please allow me to pay for it to be replaced."

The brunette looked down at where the man had been pointing and flushed. He hadn't been carrying a drink and that stain was definitely not from alcohol. He was actually somewhat concerned for the blonde's eyesight if he thought that dried cum was alcohol. Either the man was incredibly sloshed or incredibly blind. Whichever way it was, the younger of the two felt bad about the man offering to pay for a new shirt when he hadn't caused the damage in the first place.

He didn't want to say what it actually was though, as that would be immensely embarrassing on his part, so he tried to blow it off, telling the commander not to worry about it. It was a shit shirt anyways. But the blonde was persistent and eventually Eren gave in and followed the two back to Levi's home—since it was closer—so that the shirt could be washed. He didn't mean to end up in this situation but by the time the conversation was over he realized the blonde had somehow swayed him into agreeing.

The brunette realized that this must be one of the reasons why he had been chosen to be the commander. He certainly was brilliant with words, and awfully manipulative, now that Eren thought about it.

Those were the thoughts running through his head as he sat at Levi's dinner table wearing one of the older man's shirts and sipping a cup of tea. The shirt was actually not too small on him and the brunette came to the realization that his body had never really gotten that big. He had a small build and Eren mused that this could have happened due to a variety of factors. Maybe transforming into a titan so often had affected his growth, or maybe it was the starvation and drug use which had stunted him? Or maybe it was just his natural form and he was never meant to have a large build in the first place. Whatever the case, he wasn't that much taller than Levi.

Speaking of Levi, the man was staring at him again, this time with an amused look on his face.

"That wasn't alcohol, was it?"

The man asked, causing Eren to choke and nearly spit out the tea he had just drank. Swallowing, he looked up at the man.

"So?"

The ravenette hummed and then took a sip of his own tea, his eyes flashing and looking at him pointedly before saying, "Erwin's not stupid."

Which Eren took to mean the blonde knew exactly what was on his shirt. But if he knew then why had he lied? Why had he brought the brunette all the way back to Levi's place to wash his shirt? It didn't make any sense. The confusion must have shown on his face because the corporal put his tea down and turned in his chair to face Eren.

"He's looking out for you."

"But why?"

There was a pause for a moment before Levi answered and it looked like he was deciding what exactly he should say at this point. After a few minutes of tense silence the ravenette looked up and away, turning in his seat so as to not be looking at the brunette yet again.

"Because he's a manipulative little shit. And he likes to take in strays," he said and then after a quiet second added, "When I was around your age he found me prowling the streets, hurting people, hurting myself. You and I are not so different, I think. And he likes our type."

"Our type?"

The ravenette took another sip of tea and looked Eren up and down, humming.

"He'll try to save you, help you, whatever. And when you're back to being a shitty little shitcake again he'll sleep with you," and here his slate eyes flicked back up into the brunette's teal ones, "if you let him."

Noticing the younger man's horror he added, "Fuck Eren, he's not going to rape you, calm down. He justs wants to fuck you. If you say no he won't lay a single finger on your pretty little head. He's a bastard, but he's an honest bastard. Erwin's just a good guy with a saviour complex. And a huge dick. You won't be able to shit for weeks," he said with a smirk.

The brunette flushed and blinked, completely not expecting his corporal to say that. If he had been drinking the tea he would have spit it back out again. Parting his lips he almost wanted to ask how Levi knew but then closed them again, thinking better of it. But the smaller man was watching him with amusement and he realized that he was being treated like an adult, unlike back when they were in the scouting legion. And oh yea, this man wasn't his corporal anymore. He was just another guy—albeit an incredibly sassy and attractive one—and Eren wasn't a blushing virgin these days. He was allowed to say whatever the fuck he wanted to now. This wasn't his superior.

So he stopped freaking out, looked down and remembered that he was a twenty year old prostitute with an addiction problem. There were plenty of things in his life that he needed to be embarrassed about, but this wasn't one of them. Collecting himself, the brunette took a quiet breath and then looked back up with all the confidence of a man, a soldier, who knew exactly how desirable he was.

"Did you, Levi? Did you say yes?"

The man looked at him with his striking silver eyes and then opened his pink—Eren just noticed what an attractive color they were—lips and said, "Yes, once. But Erwin and I are better as friends. He's not really my type."

"Strong, intelligent, and handsome isn't your type?"

And then Levi's eyes flashed and he smirked in a way that could definitely be construed as seductive and smoothly said, "I like my men more my size. Erwin and I clash since we're both so...domineering. I can't hold him down and it's a little disconcerting trying to fuck a guy who's twice my size. Plus, he's more the stoic type and I like to bring a guy to his knees and make him beg for my cock," and then he was looking at Eren expectantly and oh.

He may have been a whore but holy shit, the brunette was blushing because this wasn't some strange sweaty man saying those things pervertedly into his ear, this was Levi and he was looking at Eren and he was just so damn hot and ohhhhhh, Levi wants to fuck him.

And that particular revelation made him squeak a little and then slap a hand over his mouth to prevent any other completely embarrassing sounds from flying out. Looking to the side, eyebrows scrunched up slightly, Eren concluded that he wasn't sure whether to jump over the table and ride Levi like fucking stallion or hide in the corner. Both sounded pretty good at this point.

And that's when Erwin reentered the room and handed Eren a sandwich, which the brunette took with a slightly confused face and a scholarly sounding 'ummm', because he had a raging boner and the table was very definitely not hiding it.

The blonde looked down at him and Eren couldn't help but glance downwards at the man's crotch because the ravenette had just told him some pretty interesting information and judging by the bulge in the blonde man's pants he was not fucking lying. The man was definitely hung, and he wasn't even hard yet. The brunette realized he was ogling the taller man's crotch and stopped himself, snapping his eyes back up to see Erwin's very amused face and calculating eyes. The blonde had totally noticed he had looked!

And against his better judgement Eren was completely unable to stop another totally shameful squeal from escaping his lips. He was dying, no strike that, he was already dead. He let out a whimper and slammed his head into the table very gracefully.

"You should probably eat that, you look quite hungry," Erwin said—and Eren couldn't help but notice the double meaning—before turning around and grabbing his coat and leaving with a, "Call me if either of you need anything, especially you, Eren. If you need someplace to stay, my door is open."

When he was gone the brunette looked up, catching Levi's eyes, and grumbling, "There's no way I could eat that. It's fucking huge."

And for the first time in his life the younger man heard the ravenette outright laugh because there was no way Eren was talking about the sandwich, not when it consisted of a slice of turkey and a light spread of mayo.

Levi's smile was possibly one of the most attractive things he'd ever seen, so after letting the man laugh for a good moment the brunette smirked and said, "Although I'm not opposed to a sandwich…" and then after letting that sink in he continued, eyeing the other man seductively, "I like mine with a bit more kick than that. This one seems a bit lacking in the meat area."

"...Well then, Eren, let me see if I can find you a bigger piece of meat to nibble on. I think I've got just the thing."

~X~

AHAHAHAHA

I totally just headcanoned all over the place, you guys. I'm so sorry OTL

If people want it, I'll add a lemon chapter after this. I might add one anyways. Or I might continue the story to. Let me know what you want people! 3