I, Jasper Whitlock, am totally and completely fucked. Yup, if ever there was a person to personify the term "fucked" I would be that person. I am fucked six ways 'til sunday and 100 ways 'til eternity. I don't even know where said fucking me started. All I know is I am fucked. Beyond fucked. If there were a word more appropriate I'd use it. It borders on being gang raped by 10 Emmett sized men in prison after dropping the soap. I can't tell you where it started or even where it will end. I can however told you the situations that got me here.
It started when Bella walked through the door of our house in Forks. Nothing could've prepared me for the scent that would hit my nose like a sludgehammer. Her scent caused my eyes to fill with venom. It was the sweetest thing I had ever smelt. She smelled like a dream. If you don't know what a dream smells like, then allow me to enlighten you. Imagine the smell of possiblities, endless sunny Texas nights, and forever. That is exactly what I smelt. I hadn't smelt any of that since I was a human. All I knew at the time was as Alice was clung to my arm and told me I wouldn't hurt her this human girl was going to somehow change everything.
"How I could possibly hurt someone so beautiful." I thought as I stared at this tiny and fragile human in front of me.
The next situation was the worst though by far. I had gotten used to her scent. I would still greedily suck in breaths when she was around. I couldn't help myself. Her scent wrapped me up in comfort and made me feel human again. It made me feel like my past could be forgotten. Then James and Victoria happened. As Alice and I loaded Bella into the car, I could feel all of her self doubt and I just couldn't have that. She had to know that she was worth it. So I told her as much. I felt her doubt in my statement, but I wouldn't allow that, so I sent her a wave of calm and we left the house. When she skipped out on Alice and I, I almost lost my mind. I just knew had to find her. Of course Edward got to her first, but when I did get to the ballet studio I had to fight the urge to scoop her up in my arms and remove the venom from her blood myself. As I helped Emmett destroy James I listened to Edward whined about not knowing if he could stop. That is when I truly knew he wasn't her mate. He couldn't be, if he was he could never hurt her. I had to fight myself from giving it all away when I heard Carlisle tell him to stop. I was a hairs breath away from ripping his head off when he finally pulled his mouth away from her wrist. From then on I had to hide my thoughts from him. I would just start recounting Maria and the newborns and he would stay out of my head.
Then Bella started to radiate lust all of the time. It was insane the amount of lust that came off that woman. She was a walking, talking, breathing ball of lust, but under that I could feel her self doubt and her feelings of rejection. I could feel the pain of every one of Edwards rejections. I had no idea how he could reject her. I tell you now that if she even threw one of those lusty stares my way, though she reserves just for him, I would be putty in her hands. I would do anything she asked me to and I mean ANYTHING. I would let her have complete control of my body. Of course I would expect the same in return from her, but alas that will never happen.
Now that brings us up to the tonight. We are now to the situation that tells me I am fucked six ways to Sunday. Tonight Alice decided she would through a birthday party for Bella. It is after all her 18th birthday. She is offically an adult. If only it had gone the way Alice wanted it to. No instead, Bella got a papercut in a room full of fucking vampires and all hell broke loose. I felt the bloodlust in the room increase suddenly and I don't know why, but I felt an overpowering need to protect Bella from the others. I felt Edwards bloodlust spike and he threw Bella back into the table with vampire strength and I lost it. I charged him. The problem is everyone assumed I was charging Bella. If only they knew the emotions Edward was displaying. Their little brooding god like son would be taken down a peg or two. When I charged Edward Emmett grabbed me and help me with all his strength. It was then I realised Bella was bleeding heavily from her arm and I fought harder. I had to protect her from Edward. His bloodlust was clouding my vision. I had to get her out of this house, but I was drug out of the house by Emmett and Alice was in my face forcing me to look at her. Carlisle was suddenly across the room with Bella and I knew she was all right so I stopped fighting and allowed them to drag me to the door and out of the house. As it stands though I am sitting in a tree alone. Alice and the others are angry with me.
"I am getting very tired of being seen as the weak link in this family. I think it might be time to show them just how fucking strong I am. I fought in the southren wars, for fucks sake. I was the youngest Major in the Texas Calviry. I am THE MAJOR JASPER FUCKING WHITLOCK! I will no longer be their scape goat. I am not going to take this anymore." I say to myself out loud.
I jump down out of my tree and haul ass to the house. As I get within a mile I can hear screaming. Bella's sweet voice rings in my ear. I hear she voice begin to get raspy from all her yelling. I push myself faster. I soon tear through the house hearing Esme yell in surprise. I tear up the stairs reaching Edwards room.
"It wasn't his fault. He wasn't going after me Edward. I saw him." Bella yelled.
"You know nothing about him, Bella. He was going to kill you. I promise you, I will never let him near you again." Edward ground out. His bloodlust spiking again.
There was no way in hell that was going to happen. I had to protect her from him. I throw the door off its hinges and run in, placing my body in front of Bella's before Edward could even think. I feel his instincts kick in. His bloodlust soaring higher. I feel her hands clench into my shirt. I crouch in front of her pushing her even further behind me defensively. Edward crouched down growling at me. His eyes charcoal black. He lunged at us, I realised all to soon that he was going for Bella. I threw him back into the wall and he came back, over and over. Bella's fear was begining to mount to unfortold levels. Suddenly Edward was ripped back from us and I saw Emmett holding Edwards arms behind his back pulling him away.
"What the fuck is going on right now?" Emmett rasped out as Edward fought him even harder.
"Emmett." Esme scolded.
"Sorry Esme, but this is just getting crazier and I can only hold him for so long." Emmett said.
"Jasper, what is going on? Why are you fighting Edward for Bella, she is his mate. Remove yourself from her immediatly." Carlisle said sternly.
"I will do no such thing. His bloodlust is at an all time high and if he reaches her he will drain her dry." I all but growled. Behind me I heard Bella gasp.
Suddenly in a flirry of movements Edward shot across the room and tried to jump over me to get to Bella. I stop him easily, silently thanking the Gods for my training and tackle him to the ground. Then everyone was on him. I looked up for Bella only to see Rose wrapped around Bella protectively. As soon as I feel like they have Edward under control I dart over and pull Bella from Rose's arms.
"Hold on tight little lady, I am going to get you out of here." I whispere into Bella's ear as I wind my arms around her. "Put your face into my chest. I have to go out the window." She nuzzles her head into my chest and pull her arms in close.
I turn around and sprint as fast as I can toward the window. I feel my back collide with the thin glass and hear it shatter all around me. As soon as I am through the window I toss Bella up in the air catching her bridal style and run to the one place I know she will be safe. The tready line. As I run I can hear Bella's sobs and feet her hands clutch onto my shirt. I can hear people following us, but I just can't bring myself to care. All I know at the moment is that I have to protect her. I need to save her. I need to get her away from him.
I can see the tready line and I jump over the river effortlessly. I soom see the pack growling and skid to a stop suddenly. I realize I didn't think this through. They were going to kill me for crossing the line. I feet Bella cling harder to me, if that is actually possible, as she hears the growling grow in volume. The wolves are looking passed me. I look back to see Edward. He jumps the line and runs straight for me and Bella
"Well shit." I say out loud. As chaos insues. I run again holding Bella to me tightly. " Hold on just a little longer." I hear the wolves tearing Edward apart as I stop and look back.
"Jasper, run they will kill you if you stay here. Please run." Bella says as she trys to wriggle free of my arms. That is when I smell it. Blood, it's cascading down her arm in messy drips. I hold my breathe and turn around. I see The Cullens on the other side of the river. Carlisle yells for the wolves to stop.
All to soon the wolves turn toward me. I see a murderous glint in the black ones eyes and I know I have to stop this before both Bella and I die.
"I only crossed to keep Bella safe. I am sorry I broke the tready, but I was trying to keep one of your people safe." I shout loudly. I see one of the wolves rush forward and his nose touches mine. I can feel his warm breathe on my face. His scent settling in my nose. Well, that is going to suck. I will never get that scent out of my nose. I curl around Bella, pulling her under me. I kiss the top of her head as I shut my eyes accepting my fate.
"I am sorry, Bella. All I wanted to do was protect you. Before I die I have to tell you. I love you. I have been fighting my feelings for you for as long as I have known you. Please know I truly love you." I whisper into her ear. I hear her sob quietly and her arms wrap around my neck. She nuzzles deeper into my chest.
"Bella, are you okay." I hear a voice over my shoulder ask.
"Jacob? Is that you?" Bella peers over my shoulder.
I turn to look into the face of Jacob black. The other wolves behind him of now phasing back into human form. I also see my family on the other side of the river staring over with concern. I feel their emotions. Anger, pain, fear, confusion, concern and pride.
"Bella, come here." Jacob says harshly. I feel his fear. I know where it is coming from. She is bleeding and she is also in the arms of a vampire. Bella shakes her head and nuzzles further into my chest. I am feel pride and shock for a moment at her trust in me. "Bella, you are bleeding. You need to get away from that fucking leech right now. He will kill you."
She began shaking her hear back and forth telling him no. I can hear he teeth start to chatter in fear and pain.
"Bella, little lady. Tell me what you need of me and I will do it." I whisper in her ear. I hope she'll tell me that she wants to stay with me.
"Take me back to your house please. Please, I don't want to be here anymore. Please, please..." Bella begans begging me, she is almost in a full scale panic now. " Don't make me go with Jake. He will never let me go. He will force me to stay with him. Please, Jasper take me back to your house."
I am powerless to say no to her. I am under her control and there is not a single thing in this world I won't do for her. I lift her up and turn toward the dogs.
"She wants to go back to the Cullens house. Jake, please don't make this any harder on her than it has to be. I need to pass you and if you don't let me passed I will be forced to use my power to get passed. Please, don't make me do that." I stare into Jake's eyes. I know his isn't going to let me through. I feel his determination and decide it is time to show The Cullens what I can do. I push lethary out at the wolves. They try to fight but they are no match for the synthetic feeling of sleep I push at them. They fall to the ground in useless lumps and I walk straight through.
"Carlisle come get the pieces of Edward before they wake up. We will deal with them later." I say as I walk over the bodies of sleeping wolves. Bella settles in my arms and looks up at me from under her lashes. Her face a mask of uncertainty. I can understand her feelings. Edward will be put back together and she was unsure how he would react to her. I jump the river and walk at a human pace through the woods. My family stuck close by watching us closely unsure or what to do from here. All I know is that I can never let this slip of a woman in my arms go. I will prove to her I am better for her than Edward. I will protect her from anything and everything I can. I will give you anything she asks for. I can deny her nothing.
All to soon we reach the house and I run inside. Bella had fallen asleep in my arms somewhere alonng the way. I take her to my study and lay her on the couch. I can hear Carlisle and the other putting Edward back together outside and I know that soon the shit will hit the fan, but for now I focus on Bella. I watch my little lady sleep. I will deal with all the rest later.