Disclaimer: Here's the deal. Paramount owns the Enterprise, and all those encased in it.
A/N: If you guys like this story, please review it for me. I'm really excited about the idea I have.
Commander Charles Tucker III sat at his desk in Engineering, wrist deep in reports, with a scowl on his face deep enough to set coins into. He picked up a random PADD, one labeled 'Bridge Repairs.' After several long seconds of riffling through the pile, he came up with another, this one with the heading 'Crew Assignments.' It was one of those days, he had decided several hours ago. A misplaced Monday, his baby sister Lizzie had phrased it. One of the days that seemed to go on forever, with a never ending pile of work to be done. He sighed heavily, pinching the bridge of his nose in an attempt to ward off the oncoming headache. Thoughts of his sister didn't bring knife sharp pains to his chest anymore, although he was sure he wasn't over her death. He couldn't close his eyes without seeing her face. Sometimes he saw her as he remembered her, blond and tan and beautiful. Other days he saw her as he imagined she had died. Lying in a field somewhere, body charred and black and unrecognizable. Or crushed under a house, maybe impaled on a steel rod. Or maybe she was one of the really unfortunate ones. The ones who were trapped in air pockets under collapsed buildings, slowly starving to death and realizing that no help was going to come...
"Commander Tucker?"
His head shot up out of his hand. The Commander's office was little more than a cubicle set up in the corner farthest from the warp core. Lieutenant Hess, his second in command, and a fantastic engineer, stood against the portable wall with a small, shoe box sized container in her hands.
"Anna,"he said, displaying an energy he didn't feel. "What's up?"
She looked slightly uncomfortable, and Trip suddenly knew what was in the box. "Well, sir, I was just getting lunch, and Chef said you hadn't been yet, so I had him prepare this for you."
She darted forward, and pushed some PADD's out of the way to place it on the corner of the desk.
"Are you motherhenning me again, Anna?"he asked, with a slight frown. 'Motherhenning' was the term he attached to the behaviour nearly everyone was displaying when they were around him. Getting his meals, checking up on his sleeping patterns, asking him if he wanted to 'talk.'
She shook her head adamantly. "No, sir. I just...permission to speak freely, sir?"
"Come on, Anna. You should know by now that I expect you to." Trip was the only department head on the ship who encouraged free speech among his crew. He needed them to ask questions, to tell him when he was out of line, to question his judgement. But he knew that when the time came, they would follow his orders without question or comment.
"Well, the body needs nourishment, and so does the brain. You're not going to be able to help Elizabeth if you don't take care of yourself."
Trip's anger flared up suddenly. 'How dare she?!!'he screamed to himself. Using his dead sister as a reason for him to get off his ass and eat something! His stood up so quickly his chair flipped over, and before he could rein his temper in, he snapped, "I'll eat when I damn well want to, Lieutenant! Is that clear?" He punctuated his anger with a finger stabbed in her direction.
The shock that showed on her face told Trip just how much he had changed since the attack on Earth. Hess nodded stiffly, then mumbled something unintelligible. She backed out of the room, and hurried back to work, like a scolded dog running away with its tail between its legs. Trip's anger deflated rapidly, and he righted his chair before slumping down into it. He encourages free speech among his staff, and when they say what they're thinking, he blows up. He covered his face with his hands, and leaned over his desk. He felt like everything was unraveling so quickly, and he was running behind the mess with scotch tape, trying to put everything back together.
"Reed to Commander Tucker."
The comm set into the wall next to him spit out the words, and Trip blew a sigh of relief through closed lips. He would have to apologize to Anna, but looks like it would have to wait. He reached for the comm panel, and responded. "Tucker here. What's up, Malcolm?"
"There's a slight variance in sensor readings, sir. I was hoping you weren't too busy, and could come take a look." The British officer's dry tone was transmitted through the comm, and Trip got the sudden impression that it was a slow day. From a tactical officer's point of view, anyway.
"You bet,"he said, standing up quickly. "I'm on m'way."
He didn't wait for an acknowledgment, but cut the connection and left his office. Small groups of engineering personal were spattered around the department, working as he had asked them to before going into his office. But now, as he walked towards the lift on the opposite side from his office, he felt multiple pairs of eyes on his back. Either Hess told everyone, which was extremely unlikely, or they had all seen or heard his little display. He sighed in frustration, and waved his hand in the air before entering the lift.
"I'll be on the bridge,"he shouted, as the doors closed. A frown creased his handsome face. He knew he would have to find a way to make it up to his second in command. He certainly didn't want her jumpy, and afraid of getting yelled at while she was on duty. She was the kind of person who looked up to him, but would not do everything he asked, without thinking it through for herself. She questioned his decisions when appropriate, and he didn't want that to change.
The doors opened to the bridge, and Trip took a quick cursory glance around before stepping out onto the deck plating. It was work as usual, although things did seem fairly slow. Everyone was bent over their workstations, but the Captain was nowhere to be seen. Commander Tucker hadn't taken two steps off the lift before Hoshi called out to him.
"Commander, I was hoping someone from your department could take a look at the door to my quarters sometime. It's been jamming lately."
Trip nodded quickly, and pulled out a PADD from his chest pocket. "Sure thing, Ensign. I'll add it to my list." He continued on his way to the Engineering station behind Malcolm, when something made him pause mid stride.
"Commander Tucker."
He turned slowly to face the emotionless face of Sub-Commander T'Pol. An inkling in his gut told him that his to-do list was going to get longer before he could do anything to shorten it. He managed to keep the frown off his face, but couldn't help the tone of frustration that coloured his words.
"Yes, T'Pol."
"There is a slight delay in the receiving time between my station and the forward sensors. Any delay time in unacceptable, and you should dispatch a team to remedy the situation as soon as your department can spare them."
He held the PADD up in response. "As soon as I can spare them." He made it to his station without anymore distractions, and signed on quickly. In a matter of seconds, he had a detailed description of sensor readings pulled up. He skimmed through the list, blowing out a harsh breath before he had finished.
"Wholey smokes, Malcolm. 7.3% is not a slight variance. How the hell could this have happened?" He turned in his chair to face the Lieutenant. Malcolm's response was a non-committal shrug. "I've run all the tests I could think of, sir. There were no indications of anything out of the ordinary."
The Commander frowned. "But something's gotta be. I've got a few more things we could try up my sleeve, but if that fails, we might have to take a space walk."
Malcolm nodded in understanding, and the two fell silent, their fingers flying over their respective stations. Trip hadn't been working long when he felt a pair of eyes on his back. He turned slowly, and was met with a stern, brown eyed gaze. The Captain was standing just outside his ready room, and once he had Trip's attention, he waved him over with his hand.
"I need to have a few words with you, Commander,"he said, then disappeared inside his room. Trip swallowed hard, but somehow managed to keep the worry off his face. The last time the Captain had acted like this, he had just been informed that the Vissian Cogenitor had committed suicide. He stood stiffly, excused himself from work with Malcolm, and strode as confidently as he could across the deck.
Inside his ready room, Jonathon stood with his back to the door, looking out the viewport at the stars as they zoomed past. Trip stood at attention, his hands clasped tightly behind his back. He chewed his lip worriedly, wondering what the Captain had called him for.
"I just received a report from your department,"Archer said quietly, and worry was replaced by confusion on the Commander's face. His crew didn't send reports directly to the Captain. They were sent to Trip, who read them over, signed them, then sent them on to the Captain. The only way they would go behind his back was if...It suddenly hit him like a phaser blast between the eyes.
"It was from Lieutenant Hess, wasn't it?" His question was little more than a statement, made with a slouching of his shoulders, and a sigh of defeat. Jonathon turned, and Trip was surprised to see his face lined with worry. He sat down behind his desk, and motioned for Trip to do the same.
"It doesn't matter who sent the report,"Archer said, studying the Commander carefully. "They're worried about you, Trip. You're not the kind of guy who snaps at his crew."
"I didn't snap at my crew,"he countered defensively. Now that he knew what the meeting was about, he sat back and crossed his arms in a defiant posture. "She went too far, is all."
The Captain frowned deeply. "That's funny, because I heard she brought you lunch. Seems like the line between kindness and cruelty is pretty thin with you."
Trip didn't respond. He stared down at his hands, which were now loosely clasped in his lap. He really wasn't in the mood for a lecture, or an intervention, or whatever the heck this was. All he wanted to do was curl up on his bunk and sleep until this mission was over. Either way.
"What's going on with you, Trip?"Jonathon asked, leaning forward in his chair and resting his chin in his hands. "You're shutting me out. I know you realize we haven't eaten together in weeks."
'That's because I haven't been eating,' Tucker thought bitterly. "It's not intentional,"he answered instead. "I've just been busy." He glanced up at the Captain, knowing he would be hard pressed to get past that excuse. The minute Trip stopped being busy was the minute the ship fell apart. But his friend was nothing if not stubborn. He wouldn't be distracted so easily.
"Little brother, you're not the only one who can keep the ship on the straight and narrow. In fact, I bet others could do it without getting pregnant." Trip couldn't help but smile. It had been so long since the Captain had used his preferred nickname for the younger man, but it was appreciated.
"Yeah, but could anyone do it with so much style and witty humour?"Trip replied, straightening up in his chair, and smiling. But faster than it appeared, it melted off his face. He grew serious. "Look, Jon, I appreciate your worry, and everyone else's. I really do. But I need to get through this on my own. You know?"
Captain Archer smiled. He did know. He felt similar after the death of his father several years earlier. He wasn't a psychologist, but he was pretty sure it had something to do with proving you're a man. "Yeah, I do. But you listen here. The minute you let your work suffer, I'm taking you off duty and ordering you to your quarters. Understood?"
Trip nodded, even forced a small smile onto his face. "Perfectly."
Jonathon sank back in his chair, the relief on his face evident and understandable. He pointed a finger at the young engineer. "But you are going to go get something to eat, then head right back to your quarters."
The Commander made a face. "But sir, Malcolm and I were..."
"Lieutenant Reed is a very competent man, Commander. He can deal with his problem until after you're had some rest. Dismissed."
Trip frowned for a moment, then shrugged and stood up. As far as deals went, it wasn't a bad one. He turned to leave, then paused for a minute. "Thanks, Cap'n,"he said after a long silence, his voice somewhat gruff. He nodded to himself, then continued on his way out.