Disclaimer: I do not own the Detective Conan series. Gosho Aoyama does...:bows: I am not worthy.
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A/N: Its long. Also, the lyrics throughout the story are from Spiritualized's "Ladies and Gentlemen We Are Floating In Space." Great song and I listened to it as I wrote it, this song I do not own by the way. Highly recommend that you listen to it as you read.
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Dancing in Space
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All I want in life's a little bit of love to take the pain away
Getting strong today, a giant step each day
Daisies. The white daisies were everywhere, as far as the eye could see. They had long stems, brilliantly white petals that stretched up to her knees. She was wading in flowers and she held back a giggle as they tickled her calves. She looked up and the sky was brilliantly blue, with fluffy clouds like marshmallows adorning it. Golden rays of light streamed across the sky. She tilted her head back and let the bright warmth envelop her.
Stretching out her arms, she looked down at the yellow sundress she was wearing.
"I match the scenery!" She laughed lightly to herself and as she twirled around in circles her dress swung against her knees and grazed the flowers. The scent of the daisies was heady and she laughed in response to the dizzy feeling.
"Hi Ran."
Abruptly, she stopped twirling and Ran stopped to face the blue-eyed young man that had appeared before her. "Shinichi? What are you doing here?"
He laughed and Ran smiled in response. "I could ask you the same thing. But it might be better to wonder what we're both doing here. In a field of daisies, that I'm pretty sure isn't located near either of our homes."
Ran looked around thoughtfully. "I don't know how I got here. I was just enjoying the peacefulness."
Shinichi tapped her forehead. "This is precisely why I'm the detective."
She slapped his hand away. "Hey!" But he just grinned cheekily and continued surveying their surroundings.
Another thought occurred to her. "But why are you here? Aren't you supposed to be off investigating cases?" She said sarcastically.
Shinichi regarded her seriously. "Actually, I am…sort of. But now I'm here…you want me to leave?" He looked at her questioningly and raised his eyebrows.
"NO! I mean…uh" –Ran's face resembled a tomato at this point- "what I mean is that you can't investigate anything here…unless you plan to look into the death of the daisy someone stepped on." She smiled nervously and he stared at her before grinning widely. "I'd probably have to question the chrysanthemums-maybe the roses, they're dodgy, you know."
And then he pointed in the direction she'd been dancing. "Of course, if you want to go off twirling into the distance don't let me stop you."
Ran scowled. "You know it was a lot more peaceful before you got here." And she turned around in a huff.
Shinichi watched her, thinking how best to approach the situation. Of course.
"Well, how about I recap A Scandal in Bohemia for you? There's nothing like a little Holmes talk to relax…" Ran whirled around in response, hands on her hips.
"Shiniiiichi! Enough with Holmes already. Besides that's the one about Holmes falling in love with Irene Adler-and before you deny it- anyone with eyes could see that Holmes was head over heels for her." Ran raised a hand, in an attempt to stop the blatant denials. It was no use.
"Ran, how many times do I have to explain it? Holmes didn't fall in love with her…it was…it was appreciation for her female intellect." Shinichi huffed and crossed his arms.
"Shinichi, I read it, remember? You made me sit down in your library and read the short story. I know what Watson thought but it's as obvious as the sky is blue that the brilliant detective was holding a torch for the pretty girl with brains, ok?" Ran smiled at his childish demeanor. He always got worked up over this part of the stories.
Shinichi stopped to look at her for a long moment (and Ran's heart did somersaults) and then he turned to look around. "Well, this brilliant detective deduces that there's nothing and no one around so whaddaya wanna do?"
Ran giggled. "That's your best deduction, yet. And I don't know what do you wanna do?"
Shinichi's forehead scrunched up in thought. "Wanna dance?"
Ran gaped at him. "Dance? I don't dance, Shinichi and neither do you."
"Well, you were doing a pretty sorry imitation of it earlier" He twirled around awkwardly, mimicking her. "I don't look like that!" And she raised a fist in response. But he was unfazed and he held out a hand. "Well, let's see."
So please put your sweet hand in mine,
And float in space and drift in time
And she took his hand and before she knew it his hand was around her and her hand was on his shoulder and he was twirling her around. It was clumsy and unpracticed but it didn't matter. And all Ran could see was blue (beautiful brilliant blue) eyes and white daisies and fluffy clouds. And all she could feel were their intertwined fingers and his hand on her waist, tugging her closer. It wasn't a waltz or a slow dance. They were just spinning and drifting through the flowers. And Ran began to feel slightly dizzy; whether it came from the spinning, the heady scent or from Shinichi she didn't know. She leaned into him and their speed slowed down but she felt no less lightheaded. But she was so happy. So happy.
I've been told… only fools rush in, only fools rush in
But I… don't believe…I don't believe-
I could still fall in love with you
"Wake up, Ran."
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Ran was jolted from sleep as she stared up at the ceiling.
"Wake up, Ran-neechan!" And she turned to see her bespectacled charge smiling brightly. She sat up quickly and looked around her. It had been a dream? Really? The daisies, the clouds, the sky…everything had been a dream? She looked down. They were only her pajamas…no yellow dress. All a dream, even Shinichi.
She stole a gaze at Conan-kun, who was looking at her oddly, and then at her alarm clock and her eyes widened.
"Conan-kun! I'm sorry; I overslept! Oh, man I'm going to be late. And I haven't cooked breakfast; Otousan is going to start on a tirade…" And she jumped out of bed and headed for the shower with Conan calling out "wait!" behind her.
In the fastest scrub down in history, Ran was simultaneously changing into her uniform and towel-drying her hair as she relived her dream (though it had felt so real). By the time she got her head out of the clouds, she was even later as she marched into the kitchen.
"Wait, Ran-neechan! I was trying to tell you Ojiisan was called out on a case. He's not here. And he left me some money to buy something on the way to school." He grinned his little boy smile at her and she instantly relaxed.
"Well, then maybe we'll be on time after all." She turned to look for her bag and Conan pointed it out to her by the couch. As she turned she could hear a rumble on the stairs and when she turned back she saw Conan's friends waiting for him at the door. "Ok, ok I'm coming!" She could hear him say, placating them.
Ran saw them descend down the stairs again as he went to grab his backpack.
"Got all your homework?" Ran asked him and he smiled wryly and nodded. He headed out the door and stopped turning back to her.
"What is it, Conan-kun?" She hitched her bag on her shoulder.
"You smell like daisies…Ran-neechan." He smiled softly at her before leaving without another word.
And Ran stood there staring at the empty space he had been standing in. By the time she recovered, she really was late.
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Some time after that, Ran was walking home alone on a random Sunday after having done some grocery shopping. Readjusting her purse, she continued on her way wishing that she had brought a bike or something. Feeling a recognizable ringing in her purse, she fished through it to find her cell phone and answered it.
"Moshi Moshi-"
"Hi Ran." And the familiar smooth tones of Kudo Shinichi's voice brought a smile to her face.
"Shinichi!" She saw an empty bench nearby and ran to it, settling herself on the seat with her grocery bag next to her. "How are you?"
"I'm…fine. What about you, what are you doing?"
"I'm just heading home; I was running some errands and stuff." And Shinichi responded appreciatively and their conversation went on like that for awhile. Pulsated with laughter on both sides, they descended into their friendly chatter as she brought him up to speed on life at the Mouri household, at school and the cases she'd been on. He listened and responded as well as shed a little light on his cases. He teased her and she teased back, falling into the familiar pattern of 'almost but not quite.' But before long they were at opposite ends once again. But this time Shinichi beat her to it.
"Ran…I don't know when I'll be back." He said quietly to her silent question.
And Ran sensed that something was different this time. He usually told her he'd come back soon… 'Be right back' he so often said.
"Why not, Shinichi?" She asked in the same quiet voice. Shinichi sighed but took a moment in responding. "Because…this case I've been working on for awhile now…well, its damn near unsolvable."
Even though she desperately wanted to yell 'Then come home!' she couldn't. She just couldn't say that to him. Letting him believe that he'd failed.
"Don't give me that, Shinichi. I know you. You can solve anything. You've been reading about this stuff for years…I've seen you solve impossible cases. Things that have baffled people for years." Ran determinedly pushed the sleeves of her top to her elbows. "You can."
"Ran, I don't know-"
"Yes, you do know Shinichi! You do. I know it's hard…or you'd be back by now. But you can't give up Shinichi. Sherlock Holmes solved everything he came across, you can too. He's your idol isn't he?" She felt herself growing more irritated with her best friend by the second.
"Yes, Ran, but-"
"No buts, Shinichi." Ran could feel angry tears welling up and wiped them away furiously. "You have to come home and the only way you can do that is by solving this case. So there are no buts. There's only 'yes Ran, you're right.' Got that? I'll wait Shinichi. You had Conan-kun tell me so in the restaurant, didn't you? Well, there. I'll wait. But you have to solve it Shinichi." She finished a little out of breath.
"Yes Ran, you're right." Shinichi replied.
"Shiniiiichi! I'm serious." Ran rolled her eyes and sat back. He was impossible.
"I know I'm serious too." He answered her, a smile in his voice. "Did you mean what you said? That you were going to wait for me?"
Ran stammered. "Well...y-yeah. I mean, what else am I going to be doing? It's not like I can chase after you or anything."
"No, no you can't. You can't chase after me." He said with a trace of sadness in his voice. "Though it'd be funny to see…you swinging your fists wildly." He laughed into the phone.
"Won't be so funny when one of them actually connects, Shinichi." But the threat came half-heartedly and she smiled listening to him continue to taunt her. If she could at least get these phone calls, the things weren't too bad.
"Well, I have to go Ran. But I'll be back soon, ok?" Shinichi said.
Ran beamed. "I'll be waiting. Bye, Shinichi."
I will love you till I die, and I will love you all the time
So please put your sweet hand in mine,
And float in space and drift in time
------
Ran stopped getting phone calls from Shinichi when she went off to college. She had had a smattering of phone calls in close succession from him but then weeks would pass and nothing. And then months… and finally years.
But she knew he was around somewhere. From time to time, she heard that Kudo Shinichi had called Megure-keibu and solved a case. It was never in the papers; she usually received that information when she called home. When she finished college, she was kept up to date because she had friends in the police department. That and her father was still a detective. Sleeping Kogoro didn't appear as often but he usually solved them with the police department or with Conan-kun, who was rapidly becoming a favorite of Megure-keibu.
It was rumored that he had appeared for a Kaitou Kid heist in Kyoto but Ran had not been there to see for herself. After she'd moved off on her own, Ran was hauled into fewer cases. Her life was a bit different too, what with work and friends she was busier than she'd ever been. She was usually only around a murder when she visited her father and Conan-kun for the weekend or when Hattori Heiji and his wife (finally!) Kazuha were in town. They were her best friends along with Makoto-san and Sonoko and when they were all together; Ran couldn't help but feel 17 again.
But it didn't last for long because despite the fact that she'd never stopped loving Shinichi, she'd had to push him to the back of her mind to function properly. She didn't get any calls and she didn't receive any visits. So Mouri Ran had to get past that fact and focus on the people who were around her…at least in the day. But when she went home to her apartment, alone, it was a whole other story.
Seven years passed, though, and Ran was 24. She wasn't the seemingly happy teenage girl any longer. She was a young woman now, on her own, but with eyes that had a little too much sadness in them for their youth. There was a trace of bitterness and of futility. But she was very strong and even if time couldn't heal all wounds it did its best to hide them.
Ran was engaged.
He was a lovely young man. Smart and very handsome and clearly in love with Ran. Tall with dark eyes and a smile only for her. There wasn't a word anyone could say against him. There was no reason why Ran shouldn't be with him. Except the fact that this young man wasn't Shinichi.
And for that very reason, several people thought this young boy didn't stand a chance in hell when he attempted to court her. Flowers, candy…it didn't matter. But Ran wasn't interested…she couldn't let go.
Because it hurt. It hurt more than she thought it would after seven years. She couldn't quite bare the thought of moving away from Shinichi for good.
But one night, visiting the Detective Agency she had received a large bouquet of roses. Her father had smiled wryly at her and commented "Doesn't know when to quit, huh?" But Conan-kun had watched quietly and later when they had been sitting on the couch, her father passed out, and drinking hot chocolate he'd turned to her. First he'd talked about random things in school but then he talked about Ayumi-chan who had begun dating some boy or other and apparently had left Conan behind. Ran had exclaimed disbelievingly at this.
"But Conan-kun! Didn't she tell you she loved you, a few months back?"
Conan smiled sadly and looked at her. "Sure, but she couldn't wait for me forever now could she? She knew how I felt."
"B-but…"
"Sometimes, I think a person needs to see what they're worth, you know? To try and make themselves happy. It may not be what they always thought it would. But there are a lot of choices you can make, Ran-neechan. A lot of people to meet and things to do. Some people may live their whole lives trying to ensure someone else's happiness and forgetting about their own." He looked at her carefully and then into his mug of hot chocolate.
Ran swallowed. "I made a promise-"
"You'll always be around, Ran-neechan. And if Shinichi-niisan comes back, you will be here. You're probably the person who remembers him best…not a lot of people talk about him anymore you know. And I think he'll appreciate what you've done for him. But I think…I know that he wants to see you happy. No matter what. Because you owe it to yourself." And this time he stared straight into her, not looking away for a second.
"So, you think-"
"I think we can all be happy…it just may not be the way we always expected it. It doesn't mean you'll forget him. That's probably impossible; you guys were childhood friends, right? Best friends. Friends want the people they love to be happy right…Ran?"
Through the glasses, the blue eyes stared at her and she could feel her own welling up and she smiled and responded thickly "That's right…they do. Thanks, Conan-kun."
She stood up to rinse out her half-empty mug and missed the fourteen year old boy, that wasn't Edogawa Conan but Kudo Shinichi,swallow roughly and walk away to his room.
The next day she had called up her admirer and they'd gone out to dinner. They had several dates to concerts, dinners, museums, family gatherings, parties…but not amusement parks… never to amusement parks.
And Ran loved him. She didn't think she'd be able to but she had. He was kind and funny and he made her happy. He was so many things and she could see herself building a life with him. She did not think about how much she loved him she just accepted the fact that she did. Ran had an excellent ability to compartmentalize.
Before she knew it she had been proposed to and Ran had accepted.
Her wedding was the next day.
Ran turned to look at the clock on her microwave, 11:00. She was tired, having had a wedding shower (thrown by Sonoko, her maid of honor) earlier in the day. She took a seat by her window and stared out for awhile.
She was getting married. Sonoko was her maid of honor. Her parents would be there, reconciled. Her best friends would be there. Agasa-hakase and the old 'detective boys' would be there. Conan-kun would be there.
She was getting married.
All I want in life's a little bit of love to take the pain away
Getting strong today, a giant step each day
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The sky was a like a sapphire, adorned with small shining diamonds throughout it. The moon was so pale; it shone through the dark. Ran walked through a green bushy maze but she wasn't at all frightened by the night. The moon was so bright; the ethereal rays glowed through the dark. Ran picked up her pace as she passed through various parts of the maze. She didn't know what she was doing here but she was determined to finish this maze; it seemed like it was leading her to the center but she wasn't sure so she kept on walking.
Dead ends and several lefts later, she found herself in the middle of it. It was a patchy rectangle of grass and a small pond; she was bordered by bushes of white, white roses. There had to have been hundreds of them and each rose was set off by the glow of the moon.
"We have to stop meeting like this." Ran whirled around to face the voice and Shinichi stood there in a blue suit. And he looked young…just like he had the last time she'd seen him. She stole a glance at her reflection in the pond and realized with the astonishment that she looked just as young, only seventeen.
Ran looked back at him and he was watching her with amusement. "It's better than not meeting at all! Where have you been all this time?"
Shinichi approached her slowly. "Closer than you'd think." He responded easily. Ran scowled in response. "What does that mean, Shinichi? It's been years since I've seen you!"
He laughed lightly. "It doesn't feel like years at all; you're still yelling at me like you've always done. Everything's the same." He smiled at her like always.
Ran shook her head violently. "No, everything's not the same…Shinichi I'm getting-"
"Jeez, I'm tired. That maze took a bit out of me. Never mind all the work I've had lately." Shinichi interrupted as he plopped himself on the ground, cross-legged. He looked at her, questioningly. "Aren't you going to sit?"
Ran blinked rapidly, trying to rid herself of the tears she could feel coming and snapped "You're not the only one who's tired! I work a lot too, you know." She sat down and the silvery-blue dress arranged itself around her.
"I know but mine includes a lot of mental work. Murderers are starting to get a little craftier…doesn't stop me anyway." Shinichi grinned, teasing her.
Feeling her irritation and sadness drift away, Ran rolled her eyes trying to hide a smile. She could never stay angry with him very long. He had an uncanny ability to lift her spirits even if he had inadvertently caused the pain. She looked up at the moon and sky. "It's so pretty up there; we have a full moon."
Shinichi's eyes lit up at this. "Did you know that Holmes didn't know that-?"
"The earth revolved around the sun and after Watson told him, he thanked him and said that he'd work to get that piece of information out of his memory?" Ran finished, grinning. "Yes, in fact you referred that little gem of information to me, Shinichi."
"Ah, but why did he want to forget it?" He leaned forward, prodding her for the information.
"Because it would clutter his memory, it was of no use to him or his work." She recited like a child to her teacher.
"Excellent!" Shinichi grinned gleefully. "We'll make a Holmes freak out of you, yet!"
"Are you nuts? Become an insane Holmes lover like you? I'll pass." But Ran was all smiles, falling in the same banter they'd had for years.
All my time until I die, we'll float in space just you and I
And I will love you till I die, and I will love you all the time
Shinichi stretched and loosened his tie. "So, tell me…whatcha been up to lately? You said you were so busy."
Ran's eyes widened slightly and she cleared her throat. "Well, actually I've been running quite a few…errands lately. Calling caterers, dealing with flower arrangements…" She broke off.
"Flower arrangements." He repeated in a matter-of-fact tone. Ran looked at him sharply and took in his expression. The blue eyes shone deeper than normal, with an air of quiet understanding. A small smile curled his lips as he regarded her, wisps of his dark hair blowing gently across his forehead. His stare pierced her but remained gentle, nonetheless. A bittersweet sensation swept through her just then and Ran repeated quietly. "Yeah, flower arrangements."
They stared at each other for a long moment before Shinichi stood up and walked towards the rose bushes. "Well, there's plenty here. If florists botch it up, you'd have loads of white roses."
"There are a lot of flowers." Ran replied, silently refusing to delve any further, and she joined him. "Besides, I think I like white daisies better."
Shinichi picked one and turned to Ran sliding it over her right ear. "Nah, these are pretty nice too." He said quietly.
"Well, there you are. Huh. Who would have guessed? You look pretty good in white!" He grinned slyly at her.
Ran raised an eyebrow. "Just what are you getting at? I don't look good normally?"
Shinichi tilted his head sideways, mulling it over. "Weeell…I don't know-Ow! Jeez, why am I best friends with such a violent woman?" He rubbed his shoulder, where her fist had connected.
Ran placed her hands on her hips. "Serves you right." She said simply. "If you didn't say such moronic things all the time I wouldn't have to smack you."
Shinichi shook his head begrudgingly. He leaned forward looking over her shoulder. "Well, aside from you bopping me, there isn't much to do so… what do you say, how about a dance?"
Ran's glare melted into a smile. "There isn't much room for spinning here, Shinichi." She gestured to the limited walking area.
"Ah, who says we have to spin around? We can limit our radius…so long as you don't step on me. You had a few near misses last time, Ran." He narrowed his eyes as if measuring her slow dancing abilities.
Ran shook her head in exasperation. "Oh, shut up Shinichi." Shinichi grabbed her hand and brought her smoothly to him, surprising her. He dropped her hand and placed his around her waist, waiting for her to get with the program.
I've been told only fools rush in, only fools rush in
But I… don't believe…I don't believe-
I could still fall in love with you
They swayed slowly to a natural rhythm they both seemed to know so well. Occasionally they met each other's eyes but often they turned away with blushing cheeks. And once again, Ran could feel the familiar dizzy feeling from before. It was a poignant atmosphere, dancing here with Shinichi in the moonlight. Both eternal and short-lived. She could smell the fresh, sweet scent from the white rose in her hair.
Ran looked up at Shinichi and he smiled. "Cold?" She shook her head. "No, I'm fine." She could feel heat radiating off him and she leaned closer into him. And dancing here with Shinichi, she could forget. Forget about everything and everyone else. For once in both their lives, they were both alone with no one to interfere. Before she knew it, she was resting her head in the crook of his neck and she could feel his deep voice vibrate through her when he spoke. "Ran, I wanted to tell you something."
She shut her eyes and nestled closer. "Mmmm, what?" She replied dreamily.
"Ran, I…" He stopped suddenly and Ran shifted. "What, Shinichi?" She asked softly.
He tugged her a bit closer and sighed. "Nothing. I just...I-I want you to be happy."
"I want you to be happy too, Shinichi." She said hazily, the scent of roses was intoxicating. The swayed gently together in the night as Shinichi rested his head on hers.
All my time until I die, we'll float in space just you and I
And I will love you till I die, and I will love you all the time
"Wake up, Ran."
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Ran could feel someone jostling her shoulder. "Ran, wake up!" the person called. Batting their hand away, she groaned and sat up. Blinking owlishly, she looked around to see her best girlfriend, Suzuki Sonoko, tapping her watch expectantly. "Sonoko, what are you doing here?" She looked around confused. What the-?
Sonoko looked at her oddly. "What am I doing here? Ran it's your wedding day! And you're late!" But Ran just looked at her disbelievingly and so she barreled on.
"You're supposed to be dressed and we were going to do your makeup and hair and put on your dress at the church so you'd be fresh for the ceremony!"
"But…where's Shinichi?" Ran stood up, rubbing her shoulder (sore from sleeping on the couch) and walked to her kitchen.
At that moment, Kisaki Eri walked in. "Sonoko-chan is she ready…what? Shinichi? Where?" She peered around Ran's nearly-empty apartment and turned to look at her daughter.
Sonoko opened her mouth to speak but shut it and observed her best friend carefully, who stood there still disoriented.
"Ran," she said gently. "It was a dream."
Eri turned sharply to look at her daughter and Ran stood quietly before smiling widely. "You're right. I don't know what I'm talking about. I shouldn't have slept on the couch; I start babbling like an idiot."
She walked past them and headed to the shower. "I'll be ready in ten minutes! Don't worry, everyone waits for the bride!" She shut the door behind her leaving her mother and best friend alone.
Eri and Sonoko exchanged glances before Eri went to the kitchen to make coffee (albeit bad coffee but coffee nonetheless); Sonoko sat down, resting her chin in her hand, and gave an unhappy sigh. Oh Ran…
Just then Kazuha walked in. "Is she ready? Sonoko-san, is everything all right?" Eri walked in with three mugs of coffee and replied "Ran's fine. She'll be out in a second."
Ten minutes later, Ran stepped out clad in jeans and a turtleneck and beamed a bright smile at the three women. "Let's go everyone!" She took the travel mug from her mother's hand and walked towards the door. Eri walked on after her and Kazuha watched them go with a curious smile. "She looks…really happy. Not nervous at all."
"Yes, she does." Sonoko answered after a moment.
Kazuha set her empty mug down and walked after them but Sonoko hung back and looked around. She spotted a white rose on the floor next to the couch and picked it up, looking at it curiously. Jogging to the kitchen, she filled a small vase with water and set the flower in. Smiling sadly, she walked out and locked the door behind her.
------
Ran was sitting on the floor, reading the newspaper one Wednesday morning (her day off), when she came across a funny article. It read:
CG Designer Yoshizawa Yuta was found shot dead in his apartment Monday afternoon. The murder was solved by police Monday evening with the aid of two private detectives. Rumors circulate around his death due to his alleged involvement in the development of a dangerous computer virus. Yoshizawa is also allegedly connected to a larger crime syndicate.
Ran frowned; it was a series of odd articles that had been appearing in the past couple of years. She had been collecting them; they reminded her of cases that she had come across with her father and Conan-kun when she used to live at the agency. She'd found it especially odd, the rumors of a crime syndicate and their connection to CG designers…and the FBI. Ran remembered the long-haired man in a black knit cap she'd met in New York City, and later here at home, so many years ago. He was a member of the FBI. Had he been involved in this?
She'd always meant to call her father about them…or even Conan-kun, who was fifteen now. But things always got in the way and she never picked up the phone. She'd been married for a little over a year now. Her wedding was a whirlwind in her memory. Images of white, cake, music and flowers zipped through her mind. Ran didn't remember much of the event except that she had enjoyed it and was officially married. Glancing at her wedding band and then at the empty apartment (her husband was at work); she walked over to the phone with the intention of calling her father. Picking up the phone, she dialed the familiar number.
Ring.
Ring.
Ring.
Sighing, she hung up the phone and resolved to call back later. Reaching for scissors, Ran cut the article out of the paper and reached for the folder in the drawer at her desk to place it in where another article fell out.
American FBI agents were involved in the bust of several CG designers involved in the creation of a dangerous computer virus. Rumors suggest they may be apart of a larger organization; police have yet to make an official comment on the arrests.
Ran picked it up, placed the article in the folder and shut the drawer.
------
Two months later, Ran did see the front page article about a sting operation that had brought down a notorious crime syndicate. She did see the reported theories that FBI agents had helped in the operation. She did see that American actress Chris Vineyard was linked to the mess. She did see the connections to the arrests of the CG designers as well as connections in the pharmaceutical industry. She did realize that all the articles she had been collecting were in fact the lead in to a careful net that had been placed around the organization. A plot that seemed to be in the works for a few years now.
Ran had been on the phone with several people on the police department, who could not tell her much about the incidents. She had not been able to contact her father, who seemed to be very much involved in the affair and was hard to locate. Hattori-kun and Kazuha-chan were also impossible to reach. Even her husband had been on the phone with several people he knew and they had been relaying information to each other. Filling each other in on gossip heard in the workplace about corporate executives who had more than a few tie-ins with the syndicate. Together, they discovered that the organization had been spread all over the world. The only person who knew anything of substance that Ran could talk to was her mother, and Ran was filled in about recent events. She began to piece together cases she had been involved with before as well as several people she had met, including her old high school English teacher 'Jodie-sensei.' Talking about this over the dinner table, the married couple was far more aware of what was going on than the average person. Between them, they had been privy to more information and conspiracy theories than most of the Tokyo police force. He declared that he'd try to get more info when he left the next day for a two week business trip to China.
But Ran did not see or hear another very important aspect of the sting operation. She was not aware that the believed instigator of the sting and two year preparation was none other than Kudo Shinichi, detective of high school fame.
------
The streets were slippery, rain poured from the sky. The expression "raining cats and dogs" came to mind, even if it made little sense. Cars were moving slower than normal except for the random idiot, who thought he was invincible. Other people held umbrellas, stood under proprietorships, or ran with newspapers over their heads. It was seven o'clock in the evening, several businessmen were trying to head home and they tried to hail cabs. And as the rain fell, it soaked a young man who was walking down the street in a rather hurried manner. He was dressed in a white button down, currently drenched with water, and jeans. He had been carrying a jacket but it was in the process of shielding a bouquet of red roses from the downfall.
Kudo Shinichi was on his way to the home of Mouri Ran. Yes, he did know that her last name was no longer Mouri but he couldn't quite bear to associate her with any other surname so he conveniently forgot it. Shivering slightly, he ignored the cold and kept walking. Either way, he strongly preferred to be walking in this body than that of a fifteen year old. Even though he had been nearly the age he had shrunk from, Shinichi could never escape that he was twenty-five damn it all. So the second that Haibara Ai had finally been able to create an antidote for the situation that had been plaguing him for nearly a decade he jumped to take it. He'd been Kudo Shinichi for a good six months now but it had been kept very quiet. But with all the recent events, he had been meeting with quite a few people.
None of whom included Ran.
When he'd begun planning, he had divulged his real identity to select members of the police and incredibly to Mouri Kogoro. But the old man had proved to be invaluable throughout the years and Shinichi never regretted telling him. And although Shinichi was aware that Kisaki Eri knew, he had instructed them both not to mention anything to Ran. He didn't want her involved; he'd taken several steps to ensure that Ran could lead a happy life without the shadow of the Black Organization, or him for that matter, and he wasn't about to have it spoiled. It had resulted in a few heated arguments with Eri-san, who insisted that Ran deserved to know everything. It did not help that Hattori had come to him once and declared that he couldn't keep hiding things from Kazuha. Together, Ran's mother and the now Hattori Kazuha, argued with him monthly…sometimes weekly. But Shinichi was adamant in his decision and refused to be swayed.
His resolve was only strengthened when he'd learned from Mouri and Takagi that Ran had been calling the agency asking questions about various incidents that had been reported about in the newspaper. Takagi said that Satou had been receiving a few calls from Ran as well; apparently Ran was more on target than most people just by doing some independent detective work.
Inwardly, it made him smile that Ran would follow on the detective instincts she'd always claimed she did not have. But Shinichi knew that the more Ran poked around the more dangerous it'd be for her. He'd worked too hard to keep her safe…and happy. He'd meant every word he's said to her as Conan that night over a year ago. He wanted her to be happy. Shinichi knew, logically, that it had been the best thing possible for Ran to marry someone else.
But it still ate away at him every time Shinichi thought that he had sent her into another man's arms.
Yet here he was, practically running down the street, soaked to the bone, with flowers in his hand to take to a woman who was already taken. Shinichi told himself that he wasn't heading there to try and confess his love for her. He wasn't going to hurt Ran with what could have been. She deserved to be blissfully happy; Ran deserved a happy marriage, beautiful children and a great career.
Ran didn't need the love declarations of a man, who after 8 years, still could not forget her. Could not move away from her. Could not forget that she was the most beautiful person he'd ever seen. A man who still missed talking to her, laughing with her, looking at her and just simply being with her.
A man who still wanted her, despite all the damnable things that stood in his way.
He glanced at his watch; he'd been out for half an hour now. He was still a ways away from her home; the fact that he's stopped to get her flowers had delayed him as well.
Once again, Shinichi reminded himself that he wasn't heading there to profess his love. He was going to tell her the truth. Everything he'd been hiding and why he'd been hiding it. Tell her that he was glad that she'd waited for him for so long and how happy he was for her. He expected a beating and tears, though he desperately did not want to make her cry. He'd done enough of that. Shinichi was going to give her the truth.
He could not; however, explain the roses.
Except that Shinichi was imagining the expression on her face when he gave them to her. The way she'd breath in their scent and her face would flush with happiness because she loved flowers. He could see the bright smile that would light up her beautiful face. He could see the shiny chestnut locks that would swing when she'd turn to put them in a vase.
Shinichi crossed a relatively deserted street as his mind continued to envision Ran's smiling face when she saw the flowers. Those beautiful sapphire eyes…
There had been times in Shinichi's life when he hadn't looked before he leapt. If he had, he might have seen the white car heading towards him. He might have jumped back onto the sidewalk and rebuked himself for not paying attention.
But he didn't see it.
There was the ghastly screech of brakes being stepped on, a woman shrieked at the sight and a definite thud could be heard. People began shouting to call an ambulance, the police…anyone.
The red roses landed on the sidewalk, stray petals decorating the street as the rain quickly soaked them.
I…I'll love you to death, I guess that's what you get
And I don't know where we are all going to…
------
It was raining and the sky was darkened with grey clouds. Thunder could be heard through the sky and lightning could be seen illuminating the sky. The atmosphere was ominous and Ran couldn't help but feel a bit frightened. She was in a woodsy area and the shadows cast by the trees made her shudder. But a better examination of the area let her see that red roses surrounded her in bunches. They were dripping but this only caused their cherry hue to sparkle.
Tugging her coat around her, she realized that, for once in these strange moments when she'd been isolated, she was not wearing a dress. Recognizing what happened every time she felt alone, Ran decided to look for Shinichi. He always seemed to find her. Where was he?
So please put your sweet hand in mine,
And float in space and drift in time
She walked along, taking a moment to caress a rose…she loved flowers. Ran had always silently entertained the idea that Shinichi might one day bring her flowers. When he triumphantly returned from those cases that had always kept him away from her. She fondly remembered the white daisies and the white rose he had plucked and placed in her hair. Taking a deep breath, Ran looked around again. Where was he? Shinichi should have shown up by now. She could feel the rain chilling her to the bone and plastering her bangs to her forehead but she didn't care. Where was Shinichi? Was she all alone here?
But then her breath hitched when she could see a tall, lean, familiar figure standing with his back turned to her a few yards away. Ran's face broke into a smile.
"Shinichi! There you are, you idiot! I was so worried!" She said in mock-anger as she walked towards him, against the bitter winds that hit her.
He didn't answer her.
"Shinichi? Hello? Can't you hear me?" Ran asked, thoroughly confused. But he didn't turn to look at her or make any sort of gesture to acknowledge her presence. She stopped walking a mere three feet away.
"Shinichi! Answer me! It's Ran!" She began to feel a prickling in her eyes. Normally, she might have whirled him around to face her or grabbed his shoulder…something. But she felt so cold. He'd never ignored her like this before. And yet he wasn't ignoring her; it was as if he couldn't hear her.
"Shinichi." Ran whispered and her hand reached out to touch him but a blast of thunder made her shriek and jump back. She rubbed her arms to generate some heat. And he still didn't move.
She hugged herself tightly but not before wiping tears that had mingled with the drops of rain on her face. She didn't know if it was the rain but his figure was becoming foggy in her eyes. God, she was cold…"Shinichi, what's wrong? Please… t-talk t-to me." Her teeth began to chatter as she shivered and edged closer to him, though he seemed farther away from her. "I'm sorry…are-are you mad at me? What?" Ran shivered violently, clarity began to slip away from her and Shinichi was so far away. Feeling herself sway, she could see things growing darker. For an instant, though, she could feel strong arms wrap around her that kept her from falling.
Nothing gets stranger than this, it is what it is
And I don't know where we are all going to
"Wake up, Ran."
------
KNOCK
KNOCK
KNOCK
"Ran-kun? Can you hear me? Ran-kun, answer the door. Wake up, Ran and answer the door!"
Ran opened her eyes to a familiar voice. She knew that voice. Vaguely realizing that it was still raining, and remembering how cold she'd been with the rain pounding on her, she ran towards the door and swung it open. "Shin…Kudo-san?" She stepped back, shocked, and Kudo Yusaku walked into her home. But she had been expecting…
"Ran-kun, I'm sorry I'm here so late but there's something very important I have to tell you." Yusaku avoided her eyes and looked out the window instead. Ran, still disoriented, barely heard him as she tried to clear her mind and straighten out why she was no longer damp. And if it was because it was another wretched dream. Dammit, she wanted to know why they felt so real! "Yes, I-um, excuse me Kudo-san I think I'm just a bit confused." He stole a glance at her and nodded. "Maybe you should make some coffee." Ran took a good look at Shinichi's father; he looked so tired and his eyes were red. And he seemed so much older, suddenly. She knew a lot of time has passed since the last time she's seen him but she'd always thought he was aging very well. She noticed how depressed he looked and she looked at the clock on her wall…midnight. A shiver ran through her back. "Kudo-san…why are you here?" Ran hesitated. "It's late and…exactly what do you have to tell me?" The blue eyes his son had inherited penetrate through the glasses and she felt an odd sense of dread overwhelm her.
"Ran-kun, you should make some coffee…" He began.
"Kudo-san, what's wrong?"
"Shinichi's dead."
The bottom fell out from under her. Every secure thought, every foundation that kept her life in tact shattered into millions of pieces. Ran could feel her heart climbing into her throat. "W-what?" She croaked.
"Ran…Ran-chan, sit down-have a seat on the couch." Yusaku stepped toward her but she flinched.
"No…no no no no. NO. No, Kudo-san. That's not true. That's not true. NO." She shook her head fiercely. No. He was wrong. He was all wrong. There was no way…
"Ran-chan, there was an accident—"
"Don't lie to me! Why would you say such a thing? He's not dead. Shinichi is not dead." It was a lie…but why would he lie to her? But there was no way, she had seen Shinichi. He was fine! He was fine. Someone had lied to him. He had it wrong. Shinichi's dad had it wrong.
"Ran-chan, why would I lie to you?" Yusaku reached for her hand. She gripped it roughly and she begged. "Then someone misinformed you, Kudo-san. They had to!" Yusaku was shaking his head and he reached for her. "He's not dead! Shin-Shinichi…" And her denials dissolved into sobs. "No no no, Shinichi!"
And Yusaku just held the young woman that he'd often considered a daughter. Ran shoulders trembled as she continued to cry into his coat. He could feel her shaking her head in disbelief but he just held her tighter. He had been the first to learn the news and after breaking the news to his wife, who was devastated and currently in the company of the police and Agasa, he had left to tell the person who would be affected the most. Yusaku was fully aware of the breaking news reports on every news station. If he had not arrived, Ran would have learned of the death of Kudo Shinichi through her television.
------
Two cups of tea were set before Ran as she sat on her couch and Yusaku took a seat in front of her. "Drink some, Ran-chan. You'll feel…warmer." She nodded and took a sip but she could still feel the tears in her eyes that threatened to spill at any moment. She didn't think she could speak with the harsh lump in her throat.
Yusaku cleared his throat and edged closer. "Ran, there's something else I have to tell you…about Conan-kun."
Ran shot him a sharp glance. "What? What about Conan-kun?" Though her voice spoke unwaveringly, her hands trembled in anxiety.
He looked away. "I know that you've suspected through the years…Conan's real identity." He began.
Ran shook her head. "I know what you're getting at but I…they aren't the same. I've seen them both together…and he looks like Shin-Shinichi because he's related to Yukiko-san. And he knew so much about deduction because Shinichi was…was always teaching him. They aren't the same person, Kudo-san." And this time she edged closer, clutching her cup. No, no way.
"No, Ran, Conan…Edogawa Conan is Shinichi." Yusaku replied quietly.
Hot tears began to flow down her face but she stayed silent. She squeezed her eyes shut. Maybe this nightmare would go away…then she could go back to Shinichi, they could dance. Because this-this was just wrong.
Not both of them. God, not both of them.
She could hear Kudo Yusaku reciting the events to her. Ran heard about Tropical Land and she could feel herself nodding. Yes, Shinichi had left that night. She hadn't seen him again…Conan-kun…Conan-kun had come to live with her. She heard about an organization and her subconscious remembered what she'd read in the newspaper. She heard about little Haibara Ai…who wasn't so little she was fifteen. But she wasn't fifteen. She was a member of that organization. Or she used to be…and something about an Apotoxin 4869. A tranquilizer dart gun. Shinichi's body had changed into that of a 7 year old and he had lived with them as Conan-kun. He had been protecting her. The FBI was involved with this. There was a bow-tie voice gadget that he had called her with. Shinichi had gotten his body back six months ago. He had engineered the sting. Shinichi had never left her…they had tried to take him to America but he had stayed…for her. Shinichi had never left her.
Conan-kun was Shinichi.
Edogawa Conan was Kudo Shinichi.
The sob that escaped her was not one of surprise. Because deep down she had known all along. It all connected together. It all made sense. The tears that glazed her face came from sorrow because she had lost them both.
Conan-kun. The strange but so very special little boy that had been her little shadow when she was only 17. Her guardian angel that protected her, who shielded her from knives and gunshots and who had comforted her when she was in pain. The little boy that she should have been protecting. She should have kept a closer watch on him. She should have taken better care of him.
And he was Shinichi. Shinichi had been there the whole time. It had been Shinichi who had stuck an arm in front of her to shield her, when he could barely reach her waist. He was the one who had phoned her when she missed him most. He had followed her everywhere, never letting her out of his sight. Shinichi had stayed by her side always, even when others tried to take him away.
Why didn't I follow him at Tropical Land?
Ran dropped her face in her hands and cried.
Yusaku reached a hand out but pulled back. "Ran…your mother called and she's on her way. Where's-?"
"He's on a business trip to China." Her hushed voice could be heard between the gasping breaths. "It's all right, Kudo-san. I'm sure Shinichi's mother needs you right now…you should go." She looked up, wiping her face and tried her hardest to give him sort of sign that she would be ok. A smile…she was so used to giving fake smiles. But it didn't come. Instead he nodded, he stood and gave her a brief but firm hug and began to walk out.
"Kudo-san, how did he die?"
Yusaku stopped. "Ran…"
"Kudo-san please." She asked in the firmest voice she could muster. "How did he die? You said there was an accident."
"He was crossing the street earlier this evening and he was hit by a car. The car wasn't speeding. It was a man driving with his family. It seems that Shinichi crossed without looking."
"B-But why was he walking on the streets? Where was he going?"
Yusaku's breath caught.
A familiar sense of dread came over Ran again. "Where was he going?" She repeated.
"Ran-chan…he was-he was heading down fifth; he was carrying a bouquet of red roses."
"But fifth…that's not by his house! Fifth is…" She stopped and clutched her hands together. "He was carrying roses?" She whispered disbelievingly. Yusaku met her gaze for one moment before he turned and left.
Ran could hear another car driving up and she assumed it was her mother. Lying down on the couch, she covered her mouth, muting the horrified sobs, and begged sleep to claim her.
------
Her husband called her a day later and said that he had heard that an old friend of hers had died. He asked whether he should come home; was she all right? Ran answered that she would be fine and no, there was no need for him to come home. He asked her to send his condolences. She assured him he would.
But now Ran was heading down the streets of Tokyo, having refused a ride from anyone, to the Kudo mansion. Hattori Heiji organized a private memorial (after the previous day's funeral service) for Shinichi, open to those who had known him best…and who knew of Conan. In the past days, the number had grown a bit but the public was still out of the loop.
The sky was still cloudy from the recent rains. She made her way down avenue after avenue; she walked the familiar path that she had taken so many times with him. She crossed through the crowds, her hands in her coat pockets. Ran didn't pay much attention to anyone and while she accepted the visits from her friends who were concerned over her, she did not encourage the visits. She had flat out denied their requests to take her to the memorial. She would go on her own.
The path took her by Teitan High School and she paused to stare through the fences that encased the soccer field. How many times had she watched Shinichi lead their team to victory? How many times had they sat next to each other in class, stealing glances at each other?
Ran turned away and kept walking and came across the part in the road that would separate them. She would go onto the agency to her father. He would go one home to his house, empty except for its sole inhabitant. It wouldn't be empty today.
She could see his house in the distance now, and as she got nearer, Ran could see several parked cars (civilian and police). She spotted Genta-kun, Ayumi-chan and Mitsuhiko-kun. Ran noticed both boys had an arm around Ayumi, who seemed to be crying profusely. She stopped in her tracks and waited for them to go inside, not sure why she didn't want them to see her.
Ran could hear the low murmur of voices and she opened the gate, the way she had so many times before, and paused to take in the house.
It was enormous and the architecture, while attractive, was simple. It was practically made and the perfect place for Shinichi to have resided in. The place where she had spent years playing in as a child. Where they had done homework together, where she had cooked lunches for them. The same house that they had just sat on the couch, ate, and watched movies together. The library that Shinichi had adored. The library she had met Conan-kun in.
Go in, Ran, go in.
Walking slowly up the path way, she entered the house and, noticing its emptiness, she continued walking towards the library.
Ran leaned sideways out of the doorway and peeked inside. As she gazed at her surroundings, a sad smile grew on her face. All around her were flowers and she hung back at the entrance, noticing all the mementos that had been put out. Shinichi's old soccer uniform hung up on the wall as well as his favorite soccer ball. A leather bound copy of Shinichi's favorite The Sign of Four was placed on the table among others of his collection. Newspaper articles blown up and framed were hung on the walls all proclaiming the deduction prowess of the famous high school detective. "Kudo Shinichi solves another impossible case!" and "High school detective Kudo Shinichi deciphers code that puzzled police for years!" and other variations could be read. His school uniform and book bag placed on a chair. Pictures of Shinichi's childhood were put on view; most of them contained Ran as well.
Warm moisture prickled at her eyes and as she walked in slowly; she turned a full circle and noticed a blown up candid photo of Shinichi, at seventeen, with his hair mussed by the wind and a small smile decorating his young face. His blue eyes sparkled bluer than ever and the moisture began to glaze Ran's face as she stared at his image, frozen in time.
She turned and paused at another set of large photos. This time they were of Conan-kun. The far too intelligent eyes behind the large black frames at seven years old, then later as a preteen a skinny boy in a middle school uniform and then finally at fifteen, nearly the young man he had been. Tall and lean, a confident smile joined the glasses. Ran choked on a sob and covered her mouth.
As of yet no one had noticed her yet, standing quietly by the wall. She could hear voices carry across the room.
"He was so smart, that kid; you knew it the second you looked at him…"
"When I discovered who he really was…"
"He used to get into all sort of trouble as a boy. But he was always so happy always laughing and teasing…"
"He was always so smart and he was always the brains behind all our plans"
"He could be a bit of a loner but he was always with her…always with Ran-even afterwards…"
"She looked so sad when I saw her."
"She looked so cold…do you think she'll ever recover?"
"No."
Ran turned away from the voices and her breath caught at the pictures of herself. When she was a child… pictures of her in Central Park in New York, in Los Angeles at his parent's home. Candid photos of her laughing at school and fighting in tournaments. When she'd gone away to college…when she had returned. The day she'd gotten married. Photos of them together in all of those locations…a photo of that play, so long ago. Where he was embracing her.
He kept them all.
I've been told only fools rush in, only fools rush in
But I… don't believe…I don't believe-
I could still fall in love with you
And still no one took note of the sad girl, who seemed to be battling with herself to keep it together. Except for perhaps another young woman. Blonde, wavy-haired but in her late teens, not twenties, Haibara Ai. She had watched Ran hesitantly peek through the doors and saw the tears come down her face when she saw the pictures of Conan. The sad smile grazed her features when she picked up the photo of herself and Edogawa-kun at her wedding. Ran's hair was pinned up in a sloppy bun and her bangs and other wisps of hair framed her face. The girl's slim frame was covered entirely by a knee-length, brown, tweed coat and Ai noted that it was probably a conscious decision of the girl not wear a black trench coat.
You will be missed, Shinichi, especially by her.
Ai knew that Ran would probably never recover; she had known him best, after all. Even with all the lies, Ran had seen a part of Shinichi that most people were never privy too. She also had his heart. Ai's brow furrowed in confusion when she saw Ran's eyes widen and her hand cover her mouth in shock. Turning to look, she knew where her surprise came from.
At the center of it all, was a large picture of 25 year old Shinichi. Another candid photo as Shinichi's eyes flashed at the camera and the form of the man he had become was there for everyone to see.
Ran's eyes squeezed shut and she shook her head. She took deep breaths and a regretful smile appeared again as she took in his likeness. Shinichi, his remnants and memories, were a beautiful possibility of everything that could have been.
Ran began to back away slowly and then Heiji turned, his arm around Kazuha, and waved at her gesturing for her to come in. She caught his eye and tilted her head, giving him a smile that reached everywhere but her gleaming eyes. Ran shrugged her shoulders, took a deep breath and ran out.
I will love you till I die, and I will love you all the time
So all my time until I die, we'll float in space just you and I
------
She kept running until she got to her destination. Ran ignored the stares she got from strangers that took note of the sobs and red-rimmed eyes. Near a tree, by the grass, encircled by flowers stood Shinichi's grave. She approached it slowly until she stood before it and dropped to her knees.
"You idiot!" Ran half yelled, half sobbed. "What were you thinking? What were you thinking? Why didn't you hail a cab? Why didn't you drive? Why didn't you call me? We could have met at your house! Why didn't you look both ways before crossing? You were always on me about that when we were kids!" She choked and coughed but continued.
"Idiot! Shinichi, why? Why were you coming to see me? Why were you coming to see me with roses in your hand? I'm married; you know that! You're the one who practically shoved me into his arms! Why, Shinichi? Why?" She wrung her hand in frustration and punched the ground next to her.
"And then now because you were coming to see me…well now you're h-here." Her voice wavered for a moment and she sighed. "Because of me, Shinichi…I would have waited for you forever. I…I'm still waiting, Shinichi. I would have gone with you anywhere…did you know what, Shinichi?"
Squeezing herself tightly, she ran her fingers lightly across the grass. "Shinichi, I just…I just wish that you hadn't gone out…that you hadn't gone out for me. Because I would have rather had you strong and healthy and alive, Shinichi, even if you weren't with me." Ran could feel her heart beating out of her chest and her fingers becoming blue with cold. "It's not fair, dammit; it's not fair at all. We didn't even get a chance. Not one chance. And now you're…you're dead and I'm a complete disaster and married." She shut her eyes briefly.
"I love you Shinichi. I always did. I know you knew that at one point because I told you but even as years passed I never stopped loving you. And not a friendly love but the real thing. I love you completely; I always will, Shinichi."
"I wish we'd had a chance and if there was anything I could do to make sure we'd get it, I'd do it. But there isn't. So… I can't. I'm sorry Shinichi. I…I should have done so many things. Hindsight, right?" And Ran gave a bitter laugh before melting into tears again.
Everything happens today, and that's what you get
And I don't know where we are all going to
------
Roses. Roses everywhere. But they were pink and yellow roses. There were white daisies. Peach tulips, white gardenias, lilies, sunflowers…even the occasional dandelion, which was a weed, but Ran didn't care. She was so warm and the sun was bathing her in its golden rays. The sky was a beautiful blue. Like…
Like Shinichi's eyes.
The flowers were tall and she did recognize that this was a little odd since quite a few of these should be short stemmed but Ran didn't care. She laughed and skipped through them. She was vaguely aware that she was supposed to be sad about something but she couldn't recall what it was. It didn't matter, anyway. Twirling around, she stopped when she saw a figure.
Shinichi.
He was tall, taller than he had been. Handsome, his face was thinner and the cheekbones more pronounced. Soft dark hair that the sun showed had red highlights in its texture. Striking azure eyes. "Shinichi…" Ran whispered.
He grinned and walked towards her; he looked older. The differences weren't major, just a signal that he had matured. She imagined she must be the same. He was twenty-five; Ran remembered…she had seen him like this before. Then the images came flooding back and Ran remembered why she thought she should be sad.
"Hey, Ran." He tilted his head to look at her with a smile, his voice as deep and delightful as ever. "It's been awhile, huh?"
Shinichi. He was here. Right here. He shouldn't have been but he was. He was alive.
She ran forward and through her arms around him. "Oh, Shinichi!" She cried and crushed her body against his. Tears streamed down her face and she could feel him tighten his hold on her.
"Hey now, don't cry, Ran. Don't cry…" His voice soothing her as he patted her back softly and stroked her hair. But it only served to make her sob louder.
"But Shinichi you're—"
"Shhhh."
"And I-I—"
"Shhhh."
"Shinichi, I'm sorry—"
Shinichi gripped her shoulders and shifted her back to take along look at her. "You're sorry? What on earth do you have to feel sorry about?"
Ran looked at him, confused. "For…for everything. I didn't wait! You were coming to see me! I didn't protect you!" She wailed and buried her face in his chest again.
"Ran, stop it. Stop it." He tipped her chin up and looked her straight in the eye. "Listen to me. You have nothing to apologize over. Nothing. Understand? So get those silly ideas out of your head. I swear Ran…you always think things are your fault." He shook his head and sighed. "I'm the one who should apologize! I've been lying to you for years."
"No, Shinichi. I understand. I understand everything. You were only trying to protect me. But you should have told me!" Her sobs were silenced but Ran could still feel an aching in her chest.
Shinichi shrugged and gave her a half-smile. "Well, it worked. You're safe and you're all right."
Ran shook her head. "But I'm not. I'm not!" And then Shinichi took hold of her hand and waist and whisked her around. "Shiniiiichi!" She shrieked. "What are you doing?"
Shinichi frowned at her. "We're waltzing, isn't it obvious?" He twirled her around again. "Shinichi, you have demonstrated some impressive dancing skills in the past. But this isn't waltzing. If anything, we're crushing pretty roses—Ahhhh!" She yelped as their feet tangled and she fell backward and landed on the grass, with Shinichi half on top of her.
Rubbing at his shoulder, he grinned wickedly at her. "Well, this is an interesting predicament isn't it?"
She narrowed her eyes in suspicion. "Shinichi…"
And he kissed her.
It was like nothing she'd ever thought it could be. It was so sweet and warm. Her instincts kicked in and she responded earnestly. She could feel his hand come up to cup her cheek and her own drifted up to tangle in his hair. So soft. His hands drifted slowly up and down her arms, stroking her so gently. Their kiss grew stronger and less tentative and Ran lost herself in the wonderof it all. So magical.
I…I'll love you to death, I guess that's what you get
And I don't know where we are all going to…
They were still lying on the flowers except Ran was now resting her head against Shinichi's chest, listening to him breath and feeling his chest rise up and down.
"You're beautiful, Ran." Shinichi whispered as he toyed with the white strap of her dress. Ran raised her head and looked at him, to see a light blush coloring his cheeks. "I should have told you so many times, Ran. I should have." His thumb brushed against her cheek. "You always were, when we were kids and in high school. And now…you're more beautiful than ever." Ran watched him carefully and then leaned forward to place a kiss on his lips and smile. He made to sit up but he kept her close. "Listen to me, Ran." His voice a bit rushed. "I love you. I've always loved you…I always will. I'm sorry about everything that happened. I wish I could change it." Ran could feel tears spill down her cheeks and he softly wiped them away. "I'm sorry about lying to you and I'm sorry I made you sad, especially that day." The lump in her throat just kept growing, hurting her. "If I could go back…well, anyway. I just wanted you to know that. That I love you. You mean the world to me." The well broke and Ran's sobs intensified but Shinichi just held her as he sighed. "There I go again."
Ran pulled back and shook her head. "No, Shinichi. You always make me happy. Always." His expression didn't change, though, and she searched for something to make him smile. Then she laughed. "You remember that time I had pneumonia and you came in with a bunch of flowers but tripped and crushed them?" She laughed, loudly this time. "I was laughing so much, I started coughing and my dad bopped you on the head." Shinichi grinned and she dissolved into giggles. "Or the time we were in Central Park and I had been sick and you showed me a squirrel and instead of coming into my hands it crawled up your head?" Shinichi began to laugh with her as they began to recall all the different times Shinichi, or Ran, had done something silly to cheer the other up.
"And all the times as Conan-kun, Shinichi. Don't forget that." The atmosphere became bittersweet and he leaned over to kiss her again.
Ran broke the kiss and pushed him back into the flowers and tickled his nose with a daisy before snuggling against him. "I want to stay like this forever…you're so warm."
She missed the grief in his expression that would have betrayed him, as he tugged her closer to him. "Yeah…I love you, Ran."
"I love you too…Shinichi." She murmured and sighed. Shinichi swallowed hard and briefly anguish crossed his features. He pulled her to him and kissed her firmly. Ran tilted her mouth against his, taking in the sweetness and flowers and the sun.
I've been told only fools rush in, only fools rush in
But I… don't believe, I don't believe-
I could still fall in love with you
"Wake up, Ran. Everything's going to be all right."
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The End.
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Sapphirestars Notes: Well, I don't know what possessed me to write this. Except that I was watching the movie "Vanilla Sky" and I thought 'there's a fic in there.' Now this fic is really nothing like the film except that the memorial scene was inspired by the memorial scene in the movie. And yes, it was very long but I really didn't think there was an appropriate place to cut into another chapter. I know some of you probably want to flog me so I apologize profusely. Sorry! But I hope that you did...um... enjoy it and that you'll leave a review.
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