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One-Pointedness

I was here, in my house, the one I had inherited when my Gran died. I was in her bedroom, and there, on the bed, with some half dollar hussy, was Jason. I stared at my dim witted brother in shock. In all my years, I had never seen anything as disturbing as this. He saw me, and rushed to cover himself up. The woman underneath him, whoever she was, did the same.

"Get out of my house!" She rushed towards the door, apologizing all the way, but my ears were all for Jason.

"I can explain-" I interrupted him.

"I can't imagine how you could possibly explain this. I believed you when everyone else was saying that you killed all those innocent women. I put up with your nonsense all the time, do you know what people think of you?" He motioned to the crumpled sheet clutched in front of his private area.

"Sookie, I don't know about that, but I have a problem here, and you just took away the last thing I had that could fix it!" I couldn't believe he was thinking of his dick. I was sick of his one-pointedness.

"Jason Stackhouse, you are a pain in the petunia, and more trouble than you're worth. I wish the goblins would take you away, right now." And with that, I marched off, leaving Jason to get dressed as I made myself some coffee. I waited for him to come down the stairs, or at least yell at me some more, goodness knows the boy wasn't subtle, but the hallway remained quiet. Too quiet.

"Jason!" I called, wondering if I should be more cautious. Maybe I should call Bill, but I discarded that thought as soon as it came. This was probably nothing, and even if it was, it was too late now. I went up the stairs, to my grandmother's room. No brother. I called again, and got no reply. I became more anxious. Suddenly, the window flew open, and an owl flew in. Just as quickly, it turned into a fully clothed man, with some crazy fashion sense.

"Are you some sort of shapeshifter?" I asked, confused. Why wasn't he naked? The man raised an eyebrow.

"You know very well who I am." He had an accent, definitely not from around here.

"I most certainly do not. And, where's my brother?"

"I have brought you, a gift. It's a crystal, nothing more. But if you turn it this way, it will show you your dreams." He takes out a crystal and starts to roll it around on his hands. I try not to follow its movements, but I don't want to look in his eyes, either. Who knows what else he can do?

"I've seen enough of other people's dreams to last me a few lifetimes, now tell me where my brother is." At this, he raised both eyebrows, and said, pointedly,

"Of course, this is not a gift for an ordinary girl. Especially not one who has to deal with a bratty brother. Do you want it?" He held out the crystal, and I thought of everything I've ever wanted. Not to have my disability, to have a happy childhood, to get married, have kids and a normal life. For Gran not to be dead. Then I thought of Jason, who wasn't smart enough to live well in this world, let alone in whatever the heck kind of place he was in now. The strange man was waiting. I steeled myself.

"Like it or not, he's my brother. Give him back."

"What's said is said," he replied.

I was getting sick of this. What is it with supes and their one-pointedness? I tried reading his mind. Nothing, great.

"You're no match for me," he continued, "Your brother is in my castle." With that, he spread an arm out, pointing toward my window. I took a deep breath, and went to look. There, past the usual maple in my backyard, there was a hill, covered with what looked like a large Labyrinth.

"You have thirteen hours to find the castle beyond Goblin City, before your brother becomes one of us forever. Do you still want to look for him?"

"Yes." I said, determined, and looked ahead. It didn't look that far. Even if it was, I was Sookie Stackhouse. I've dealt with telepathy, vampires, and shapeshifters. I could do this.

---

Jason woke up in the middle of a pile of feathers. He looked at his dick. Still there. Then he looked around, and yelped, crabwalking backwards as some little ugly creatures jumped around in front of him. First vampires, now this?

"Where the fuck am I? Huh? Somebody answer me!" A goblin ran too close to his face, and laughed.

"You're in the labyrinth, that's where you are." He, or it, gave another shrill laugh, running off. Jason's penis gave a painful pull, and he looked around some more, looking for his sheet. The last thing he remembered was fucking some girl, and Sookie yelling at him for it. it wasn't his fault if his privates were about to fall off. There it was, in a pile of feathers. A chicken was pecking a corner of the sheet, and Jason jumped up, yelling at it to stop. It squawked once, and strutted away. Where the hell was he?

He started walking around what looked like a very messy large throne room, and walked through a door. Whoa! He closed the door, and decided to wait. Something had brought him here, and knowing Bon Temps, it probably had something to do with Sookie. She'd figure it out. So he came to the only chair in the room, and sat down, making himself comfortable. 'What the hell,' he thought, and gave his baby a little breathing room. Whoever had kidnapped him could deal with a little manly nudity.

Deleted scenes:

"Sookie, go back to your room. Play with your vampires and your dresses. Forget about your brother."