*Note/Disclaimer thingy: The X-men evolution chars mentioned all belong to WB, and Marvel comics. ("WB" of course, meaning "Wombats"). Marvel, meaning something an over-obsessive person stares at for a very long time, causing drool to form in a puddle at their feet. Everything else belongs to me, me, MMMMMEEEEEEE!!!!
Pantera: HEY!
Oh… us… us… UUUSSSSSS!!! (cough) Anyway… Here's another round of "Insult the X-Geeks"- started by everyone's favorite author… PANTIES!
Pantera: HEY!
Oh… Um… PANTERA!!!
Pantera: I am SO gonna deck you! Don't you dare save that! Don't you d-… I hate you.
The Actual Fanfic
Todd: (Talking to himself stupidly) Okay, yo… I gotta study for this
stupid geometry test, or I'll have to take it next year, with that stupid, fat,
ugly, showered, boring, drone teacher, Mr. Tagalachis.
(Todd crouches on the back of his chair, with his book open- upside down).
Pietro: Hey Todd!
Todd: AAGH!! (Falls off the back of his chair, and lands on his backside, papers flying everywhere.)
Pietro: (Picks up one of the papers and stares at it, cross eyed.) You doin' HOMEWORK?!!!
Todd: Well, I was trying to!
Pietro: With the book upside down?
Todd: Hey! It's Geometry! It doesn't matter!
Pietro: (Stares)
Todd: (Stares)
Pietro: (Stares)
Todd: (Blinks)…. Are you… Going away, now?
Pietro: No.
Todd: Look, yo! I really gotta study for this exam, or I'm gonna hafta deal with Mr. Tagalachees again next year! He smells like…. SOAP!
Pietro: (dryly) Oh the humanity.
Todd: … Is there any particular reason why you're sticking around?
Pietro: Well… (clears throat) I was at the court, playing a couple dozen games of basketball, beating everyone in sight, of course. Then, after showing my superiority got old, I decided I'd move on to something more worth my time. After switching all the combination locks in the locker room, I thought I might zip down to the track and field ring, and tease the jocks, by running underneath them just when they were leaping over that pole. That was fun, but it got old. So, I ran into their locker room, and switched the "hot" and "cold" showerheads, stealing all the towels on the way out. I stuck around for a few minutes afterwards, so I could here them screaming at the top of their lungs. I laughed. After about 10 or twenty of them ran by me, stark naked, I decided a change of scenery might be in order, and I did the same thing to the cheerleaders' locker room. This, naturally, was somewhat more fulfilling. Once this finally got old, I ended up here… With you… I'm bored!
Todd: Well, unless you think that studying would be more fun, maybe you should, I dunno, go hang out with Lance or somethin'.
Pietro: Lance is off hitting on Kitty… again… Fred is at the all-you-can-eat sushi bar, and Tabitha's blowing up Scott's car.
Todd: Again?
Pietro: Apparently, that doesn't get old.
(The door opens, and in walks the rest of the gang).
Tabitha: (deep in "intelligent" conversation with Lance) You should have seen the air I got this time! That car must've flown a good fifty feet!
Lance: That's nothin'… I saw Kitty in her swimsuit! Ol' baldie obviously had them doing laps or somethin'. Oh well… MY GAIN!
Fred: (snacking from his "Chin Chow's house of dead fish" doggie bag) Yeah, well… I stayed at the Sushi bar, a record 10 MINUTES before they finally threw me out!
Todd: That's an accomplishment… Unlike my attempts to STUDY!!!!!!… Oh, and on a side note, DO NOT ask Pietro about his day!
Pietro: (paying no attention to Todd, decides to swipe some sushi from Fred's doggie bag.)
Lance: Well, we're all here… What do you guys wanna do?
Tabby: (oblivious) The engine exploded, and left little chunks of melted metal all over the garage! It was so cool!… I wish I coulda seen Scott's face!
Lance: Hey! That's a good idea! Let's play "Insult the X-Geeks!"
Pietro: LET'S DO EVAN!
Fred: (munches on sushi)
Tabby: Smoke everywhere! It was a total disaster area! The burnt wreck stunk the place up worse than Todd!
Todd: Hey, yo!
Tabby: Well, you smell…
Pietro: EVAN! EVAN! LET'S DO EVAN!
Lance: Well, since we're on the subject, why not Scott the snott?
Pietro: Well… Alright. (Steals some more sushi from Freddy).
Fred: Who's gonna start?
Tabby: Todd, why don't you start?
Todd: Okay… No! Wait!… I have… To…. STUDY!…………………. yo
Tabby: Okay, but it's your loss.
Todd: OKAY! Since you insist! (throws down pencil, and upside-down textbook.) hmmm… Okay! I got one! What's with Scott's nickname, anyway? I mean "Cyclops"? What? Does he only got one eye under them shades?!
Pietro: Yeah! And, speaking of shades, why does he have "My little pony curtains, eh?"
Tabby: He doesn't have "My Little Pony" curtains…
Pietro: Hey! I'm goin' with inspiration, here!
Tabby: But he does have He-Man underwear.
Lance: Really? You have sources?
Tabby: One of my many punishments; I had to do the laundry.
Lance: Not that this surprises me. I mean, having such a macho car…. You think he's compensating for something?
Freddy: Yeah… He's got a small head.
Lance: (sighs and shakes his head)
Pietro: (snigger) Yeah Freddy, that's exactly right. Scott has a small head. (steals another sushi)
Todd: Okay, gettin' off the "head" thing… You think he always had that stick up his ass, or did he have to have it surgically implanted?
Pietro: Yeah, and think about it… who would volunteer for such a job?…. EVAN!!!!
Tabby: (rolls her eyes)
Pietro: NO! Think about it though! Scott has a stick… Evan makes sticks!… See where I'm goin'?!
Lance: Pietro, we did Evan last week…. Although, you do have a point…. (shudders) OH! BAD VISUAL! BAD BAD VISUAL! AAAAAAHHH!---- wait… no… FUNNY VISUAL! I WANNA SEE MORE!
Freddy: Hey, You almost made me lose my appetite…. Almost. (Looks into his doggie bag)… Hey! What happened to all my sushi?!
Pietro: (quickly sprits some breath spray into his mouth) Um… I dunno. The dog must've eaten it.
Freddy: We don't have a dog!!!
Pietro: Aw man… You ate the dog?
Freddy: Er--- I don't…. think I did… Um, I dunno… Maybe I did. I do sleep walk y'know… and snack.
Todd: Aw, Fred man? We don't got a dog.
Freddy: I know… Apparently I ate it.
Todd: No, I mean we neva HAD a dog, yo!
Freddy: We didn't?…. PIETRO!!!!
Pietro: heh heh…. Gotta go, I… left the shower running in the cheerleaders' locker room… (takes off).
Tabby: Locker room?
Todd: I told you… You don't wanna know….
***
(Meanwhile, at the X-mansion)
Scott: AAAAAH! MY CAR!!!!!
The EndPansy: This time, I'M writing the note! So there! (sticks tongue out at China) Mr. Tagilachis is a very annoying teacher at our old high school, and no one ever knew how to spell his name. So if it's spelled differently each and every time…that's why. We Eat What We Like! Erm…anyway.
I like these little fics, and they are so much more fun writing them with my best * insane* friend that I'll probably write all the rest with her. She's so much better at pointless comedy than I am. And I do mean pointless.
China: And don't you forget it! Fruit baskets for little children!!
(rolls eyes) Right, China. Anyways, do you guys like it? Then review, please!
We like reading them. It makes us feel important. And this is the first thing China's ever written in her entire life that wasn't forced on her by evil teachers with hot irons.
China: REALLY hot!
So she's paranoid. Tell her how cool she is! Go ahead. Tell her!
And tell me too…
(grins widely) Review!