Son, you're a man now.
Harry and Albus have "the talk".
I was sat in my bedroom one Saturday morning trying to get on with some homework, when dad poked his head round the door'
"Son we need to have a little chat," he said taking a step into my room.
The words 'little chat' normally alluded to some sort of telling off, my childhood memories were full of "now Albus we need to have a little chat about you pulling Lily's hair."
"Whatever it is I didn't do it," I said quickly.
Dad shook his head, "no, no," he said with a chuckle, "I just wanted to talk, you know, man to man."
Oh no, we were not about to have that conversation.
Dad perched himself on the end of my bed and cleared his throat, "now there comes an important time in a boy's life when he becomes a man."
I cringed. It seems we were going to have that talked.
"Now I can tell you haven't done it by your face," he said.
What?
"Maybe we could go down to Diagon Alley, get everything you need."
What?
"Then I can show you how it's done."
DAD PLEASE SHUT UP.
"The first time you do it you're going to make mistakes and there will be some blood but you're mother knows quite a nifty little trick with toilet paper that she taught me."
SHUT UP.
"It gets easier, you'll have the knack of it in no time, it's really not that hard. Just remember to always do it over the sink and clean up after yourself."
SHUT UP.
I think I'm going to throw up.
"Son, you alright?" Dad asked as I rolled over onto my side and buried my head into then pillow.
"Do be embarrassed Al," he reached over and patted my shoulder, "it's only shaving."
Shaving?
Dad got up and left the room, but lingered by the doorway for a minute, "Al you sure you're alright? You look like as pale as a ghost."
He was talking about shaving.
Thank bloody Merlin for that.
Based on a joke I heard once, thought it fitted Harry and Al pretty well. Hope it made you smile at least, please review!