Losing love twice
I still can remember how she would look at me
The smile that would make you crimson red even by just looking at it
The eyes that would show nothing but cheerfulness and brought the best in you
I still reminisce how she entwines her fingers on her golden locks falling over the sides
How she would giggle like a little girl seeing her first crush
I fantasized that I may see her again but I never knew that day would be now
There I saw her, on the train reading a book. She was quietly standing like a shadow that kept still. One hand on the book she was reading and the other twirling her curly hair to the sides. I couldn't help but stare that the girl I used to love is standing right in front of me. She gave a small smile, thoughts of amusement played around her eyes. And those emerald eyes that would twinkle in every little blink. It wasn't long that she felt that she was being watched over. I quickly hid myself on the side to prevent any suspicion. She crinkled her nose as to say she was confused. She gave a small shrug and as the train stopped, she got off. It seems that we walk in the same path as I took my way to hers. Still she didn't look up from the book. She suddenly stopped to look at the bulletin board for the train schedules. Again, she entwined her locks against her fingers. I did the same for my own terms but more of getting to know who she really was.
Her eyes look at each schedule carefully as it wandered at each schedule carefully as it wandered off to other announcements. It seems that she had a passion for reading and as she stopped at my direction, I couldn't help but freeze on my tracks and look at her eye to eye. She suddenly stopped twirling her hair and analyzed me carefully. I could tell she saw I was of no harm for she continued twirling her hair and gave a small smile. She turned her head back to her own business but I couldn't help but wonder does she know me? I hear somebody shout a name and she shot her head up to the side to be greeted by her friends. They had a small chat and trailed off slowly down the stairs. But I couldn't help and feel the loneliness in my heart that she was gone. I headed my way home to be greeted by my mother. I slowly walk in my room and open the drawer. A box. A box filled with memories and a snowflake of love.
I watch as the sun rose up and I went my way to the bookshop. There I saw her again. As I open the door the little bell rang and she looked at me. She smiled like an angel in May morning. I nodded in response as she continued on reading a book ad I look for mine. Once in a while I stole a glance at her there I saw her tilt her head like a child at an art museum. I snapped out of my thought when the manager came. He acts like she's a regular customer. The manager looked at me and gave a small grin. Since I was holding what I needed, he assumed I wanted to pay already. After buying the book, I left silently. My heart lurched not having the chance to say anything but nod. I decided to go to the park to see the cherry blossoms before winter. As I continued to stroll around the path, destiny clashed in my eyes. She was sitting on a bench, admiring the cherry blossoms while some fell on her hair, I couldn't help but smile. She took notice of me and motioned me to sit next to her. I reluctantly took the offer and as I did her mind wandered once again with the surroundings around. I gave a small sigh as I sat beside her. Her smile still didn't fade like the dewdrops that disappeared every morn. I wanted to say something but nothing came out. I wanted to tell her something but it was too late, she said it first. A greeting she gave me, and an introduction I would never forget. A small blush crept on her face as she introduce herself to me and I sis the same. We shared common interest like books and school. It seems that we had more than I thought. Sunset came and I walked her to the train station. She had an angelic voice full of joy and compassion, but also full of worry and concern. She was no ordinary lady I met; she was the person I used to love. As we went our separate ways I can't help but remember memories of her. Memories full of laughter, filled with fun but also despair. Tears echoed the room as I witnessed her leaving me, for good. Since what happen I distance myself from the rest. Though noted to be expressionless yet in my heart it is filled with so much than what people know.
As each day pass, I see her again. It was more of a routine than a coincidence. Each time we met, we get a piece of each other and slowly like a bud of flower, I decided to tell her. It was the day before Christmas and we decided to meet. I waited near the frozen ice fountain and as each moment passed my heart was racing. I barely knew what to say but I was sure to tell her how I really felt. I waited and waited and waited finally she never came. I was like a bird wanting to fly but had no key to open the cage. How could I take myself as a fool was all I thought. Days after Christmas, I didn't see her. As school started once again, I waited at the same station but her presence was not there. I wanted to ask if she really cared about how I really felt. Days turn to week and it turn to months but I never saw her again. I was outrage she disappeared without telling me but inside I really miss her. Then I found out, her friend handed me a letter and apologize for the delay. I read it and as I tried to fight the tears my heart ached. She never knew how I felt and how happy I was when I met her. I never told her that her eyes twinkled like the stars in the night sky. I slowly read it again but "I'm sorry" was what struck me most. She really loves me but I never knew. She knew that day would happen and she wanted to apologize for not being able to see me. Was that all she cared about not being able to see me. "I'm your angel here on earth but sometimes I need to go back to heaven. Although we are apart never forget that I always love you even if you didn't love me back." She was more than a friend but a person I love and always have. I remember holding her hand and placing my arm around her petite waist, saying I love you. She gave a small smile and said "True love exists in the most unexpected place but you are the most unexpected guy I would fall in love with." I gave her a small kiss and she deepened it. She was a fallen angel that stayed on earth to be with me and one day I would wake up again to find that it was all a dream.
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