firstly, i have not seen Memoirs of a Geisha.. ever. so any similarities between this fic and the movie are purely coincidental
secondly, DO NOT READ THIS IF YOU DO NOT HAVE A VERY AWKWARD SENSE OF HUMOR AND/OR TAKE LIFE REALLY REALLY SERIOUSLY. IF THE WORDS 'MOLEST' 'RAPE' 'FUCK' OR 'NECROPHILIA' MAKE YOU UNCOMFORTABLE, THIS IS NOT THE FIC FOR YOU. CAPICHE?
disclaimer: i don't own yyh, sensui, chodemon, insane asylums, or innocent sensui. i do own the other 5 sensui's and the idea for this. otherwise.. fuck you.
Memoirs of a Child Molester
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Day 1, Monday.
My name is Shinobu Sensui, and I am a sex offender. It doesn't seem particularly shocking to say, but my therapist suggested that I write it down to allow my deepest forms of consciousness to accept my ailment rather than continue to ignore it. Well, now that I've followed through with the first step of the old bat's plan, it would only be prudent to continue on with the next.
She suggested-- more demanded than anything else-- that I recorded my daily thoughts and dreams, if I have any, being sure not to leave any small detail out as it might help to cure me of my condition. Though I can not honestly call this-- what I have-- a condition, I will follow her procedures to the 'T' so as to lull her and my other oppressors into a false sense of security, eventually leading to their gruesome, enormously painful deaths. I shall expound on that at another time, however, and continue on with this baneful exercise.
Today my thoughts linger on the beginning, which proves synonymous to the date and this being the first entry in this journal of sorts. I think back now to a time before I'd offended anyone-- more accurately several years before then for it is only recently that the title of 'offender' was added to my title.
I was but a boy then-- awkward and gangly, if not a bit feminine for one of the male genus. I was quite active in my middle school and even more so in the spirit world. I'd been recruited by a talking baby prince as a 'spirit detective' and had taken to the job like a fish to water. I enjoyed my work, to say the least and it wasn't long until I'd learned to enjoy the company of my teammates just as much
His name was Itsuki and he was gorgeous. I hadn't realized it at the time, but I was quite attracted to the young demon. What with his flowing sea foam green hair, vivid eyes, and slim but strong physique it would have been tough not to have been. Yet I found it difficult to come to terms with my lust for him and channeled my frustration into inappropriate activities.
At first I would just kill a few extra demons to expel some of my pent up testosterone, but soon it led to spilling the blood of humans and demons alike. It didn't help that I'd just happened to walk in on the most horrific and earth shattering scene of my life during this time. How was I to know that there were human's quite aware and quite irresponsible in their interactions with demons? And how were they to know that I was just a sexually confused young man who'd yet to explore the depths of his own undergarments? They couldn't have known any better than I could, so it's safe to say that no one's at fault. Except for the baby prince. I want to rip out his entrails and smear them across that overly large desk of his, then take his tiny mangled body and piss in the cavity created by the abrupt removal of his colon and other digestive effects.
It was soon after I'd slaughtered those hundreds of "innocents" that I finally came to terms with my attraction for Itsuki. Rather, he came to terms with my attraction. He'd followed me as I fled from the compound, leaping from tree to tree as he was want to do, flexing those soft yet powerful legs of his, glistening with sweat, demon guts, and his own distinct brand of pheromone...
He eventually caught up with me enough to tackle me to the ground at which point he began ridding me of the blood that nearly completely covered my form. With his tongue. That sweet, silky, agile tool behest to him by the gods. Soon after I remember being very naked and very "excited". The rest of that day is a blur to me, whether it is due to the consequences of the intensity of our consummate act or the fact that I'd split off into seven different personalities in that moment, I'll never know for sure.
After such a fulfilling night it's a wonder that I could get up in the morning and immediately request that I go to demon world to acquire the 'Chapter Black' tape, but I felt strangely energized. There's just a certain way that Itsuki uses his tongue-- the godly tool it is-- that-- Hm. It appears that it is feeding time in this broken house with it's resident and equally as broken souls. I will continue after I have further-- and quite falsely-- conformed to their ritual that they call 'meal time'.
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Day 2, Tuesday.
I was unaware that they'd be daring enough to drug what slop they felt prudish enough to call food. After eating my body was quite content to remain listless and drooling till an hour ago. To say that I am embarrassed at my actions would be a definite understatement. However there is little I can do to erase the past and will merely mark this occurrence down as another offense against my very pride. All offenses against said pride will be dealt with quickly and bloodily at a later date-- most assuredly upon the same day that I finally concede to take out the old bat.
Ah, I grow weary again on this sordid afternoon and find it not in me to continue my chronicles much further than this. I shall return to my "therapy" as soon as time allows. After all, I hear they're holding a ping pong tournament in the play room and it would be an optimal time for me to gain information on this "dungeon's" inhabitants.
Till we meet again.
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Day 6, Saturday.
The fuck was that all about? I fucking hit one fucking guard in the face and suddenly I'mma killer? Fuck all! That prick totally deserved every blow I dealt 'im! That'll teach 'im to fuck with me alright...
... fucking writing... This isn't my fucking job and I'm not gonna fucking do it anymore after this one! It's their fucking sick-ass problem! Not mine! I never touched no fucking kids or anything! I mean that's so sick to go up and fuck around with a four year old or something! Their fucking FOUR and don't know nothing about fucking or anything!
The rest of them are all a buncha fucking pricks who don't deserve to live and if they wanna take it up with me they can! I'll fuck 'em all up! What bunch of dumb ass fuckers would touch a lil' boy when a grown man is so much better? Yeah, that lot would wouldn't they? Fuckers.
Well I didn't touch any fucking kids, alright? So I don't fucking need to fucking write in this God-damned fucking journal!
... he was a teenager, so that don't count. 13 means teenager so I'm not fucked up like the rest of those queers. Besides he looked like a fucking chick and he was all cute and was asking for it and shit so I gave him what he wanted. That doesn't make me a fucking pedophile or nothing though.
It doesn't.
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fuck!
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Day 8, Monday.
So the fucking old lady made me fucking write in this fucking piece of shit again. But she fucking said I could use fucking as often as i fucking liked as long as i fucking wrote, alright? yeah, that's what I fucking thought. fuck you too.
so the kid was like fucking thirteen and shit and, like, he wasn't no kid anyways-- he was a fucking demon, right? So, like I fucking picked him up from demon world and was like "hey pussy! you lookin' for a good time?" and he was all like, "fuck no man, cuz you're like human and shit!" and so then I was like "human! shiiiit! i'm the best you'll ever get you fucker!" and then he had the fucking audacity to ask for fucking payment and shit.
Oh sweet. I banged a hooker. Totally not as fucking weird as the rest of them. I paid for my ass unlike the rest of you fuckers! hell yeah and it was good.
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Day 11, Thursday.
It seems we finally expelled the jack-ass of the group. I could never figure out how he was created when the rest of us are so normal. Well besides the fact that there is an us. It seems that I'm the only one who ever has any sense about them, but that 's understandable. I'm the only woman. Everyone else is too caught up in getting revenge against this black haired boy and his orange haired lover. I, for one, could care less what those two little loverbirds do. They're too precious to kill:heart: I mean the way the big guy went all crazy and was just bawling over the loss of his friend was just beautiful! I was in tears! I know I should've felt bad that the kid turned out to be part demon and royally kicked Sensu-kun's ass, but it was refreshing to see a romance not turn out tragic:heart:
Well, I've babbled on long enough about whatever else. I should probably continue that sordid story Sensu-kun started out earlier... oh, who cares what he wants! He NEVER eats enough chocolate when I'm on my period! This is a small fraction of what he deserves for all of his neglect!
Besides I've touched a penis or two in my life... Hee hee! I totally did raunchy bad things to Itsuki-koi:heart: He loved it of course, but Sensu-kun always gets jealous of me! Me and Itsuki-koi wouldn't have so much time together if he'd just get his head out of his ass and stop trying to end existence for all beings or whatever he was trying to do. Oh well, he'll get it eventually.
Oh, le sigh. I don't want to go to therapy today. Maybe I will send the cussing jack-ass back out. He always makes for an entertaining session and I do so need a good pick-me-up. All this reminiscing is making me depressed.
Well, I'll be back soon! Bai bai diary :heart:
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day 13, saturday.
i really wish that lady wouldn't call this a diary, cuz it's not! it's a journal! men have journals and girls have diarys! she shoul- oh... she's a girl so she called it a diary, but i'm a boy so i should call it a journal... umm... i don't know what to call it now! there's boys and girls in here! one girl, but she counts!
anyways, i talked to the nice old lady today, and she told me that i could write whatever i wanted in here. she wants me to write about other stuffs too, but i don't remember what 'molestation' means. i think it's bigger than mayonase... yep, it is, and i don't know a lot of words bigger than that.
hmm... well i don't wanna not put in something good, so... uhh... hold on! lemme go ask one of the guard people what it means.
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ok, he said that it was like when you touch someone, like in the kissy way, but they don't want to. and they have to be younger than you, he said. well i've never done that! i did the kissy stuff, but we were the same age.
aniki called him 'game master' cuz he played alot of videogames and he and i were special friends. we'd play games a lot, cuz he really really liked them! and after that we would do the kissy stuffs. he always looked kinda scared, but i never knew why. soon he'd make these really weird faces though and then it was okay. aniki told me that the weird faces meant he liked it and that i should continue.
i really miss my friend now, but aniki said that this mean old 'red headed pussy-fox' killeded him. well, one day i'm gonna find the 'pussy-fox' and kill him back! it's only fair!
well they have pudding in the kitchen-room thingy so i'm gonna go get some. it's chocolate and the lady really likes it when one of us eats that! i like chocolate too:)
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Day 14, Sunday.
I have finally returned after a long departure from myself and the rest of this worthless existence. It appears that I haven't been too dearly missed as the female and ototo have been keeping my fellow inmates, the guards, and my therapist quite amused. I feel no appreciation for the woman for she is but a gnarly thorn in my side, but I shall remember to reimburse my ototo grandly.
Enough flourish for now. I wish to return to my tale from where I previously left off. Pardon while I turn back a few pages to reacquaint myself.
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Ah yes, I had previously been reminiscing upon that most enchanting evening with Itsuki. I wish to dwell on this mind-blowing event further, but time would most surely elapse far past a millennia before my need to exalt on my love would be spent.
Now to my acquisition of the Chapter Black tape. The French would say it was "tres facille" and indeed it was. Upon discovering my 6 other personalities it took little to no effort to accomplish my goal. A few lives were lost along the way, but their deaths were quite necessary. Once the tape fell into my possession I imprisoned myself till the horrors became too much for my, then too innocent eyes to bear. I hadn't slept nor eaten for days, possibly weeks, and on the day whence I emerged from the hell I'd shut myself into, I proved too weak to move or even speak.
Itsuki found me moments after I'd shut my eyes and ears to the abominations playing out on the screen. Again my memories blur with the inclusion of Him, but what I can recall fills my heart with emotion only duplicated when in his presence. Ah to relive that time in full consciousness...
Once my dearest Itsuki had dutifully and efficiently nursed me back to health I was almost immediately forced to depart without him. Despite how deeply I cared for him, the god that he was and still is, I feared that my emotions would take control and cause me to become far too irrational in his presence. I knew that I required training. From the remotest portions of my soul, I knew that I must become--
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day 16, tuesday
a chodemon master! hee! that's what aniki said i could be as soon as he did the destroy the world thingy. I asked him if all the chodemon would still be alive if the world was gone and he said that he'd captured all of them already and had them hided away for late. that made me really happy. but the world is still here, so i guess i can't be a chodemon master anymore. i really wanted to be a master of chodemon and gamemaster did too! he had bunches of games where you could capture the chodemon and battle with them and train them and all other sorts of neat stuffs! i really miss him. :( that's why i have to kill the pussy-fox! he was mean mean mean to kill my special friend! grr!
yay, the nice old lady brang me green jello! it has floaty capsules in it! it looks really good! bye bye journaldiary!
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Day 19, Friday
Mood: apathetic
it's raining outside, and that's totally how i feel inside. i like how the rain always knows how i feel. it's my only real friend.
they drugged me the other day because of something i didn't do. but they always drug me. they must really hate me. sighs whatever. i wish they would just drug me forever so i wouldn't have to be here anymore. existing is so tiring and really messes up my flow, you know? and what makes it worse is i have to write in this journal all because of more stuff that i didn't do. i'm always punished for nothing. sigh whatever. i think i want to slit my wrist and watch the blood come out... the spoons in the cafeteria look pretty sharp so i'll just use one of those. i don't care if i get in trouble. nothing matter anyways.
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Day 20, Saturday
It appears that I was put under the influence yet again and forced to allow another of my less than savory personalities run amok for a few days. I will have to reimburse my ototo most thoroughly when the opportunity arises and funds are sufficient. Perhaps I have those Chodemon cards he loves so much hidden away in my belongings. I must search later to confirm or deny their existence.
As for the eternally depressed teenager that resides within me, I am less than inclined to give him anything. It is by no one's fault but his own that his life, and I quote, "sucks so bad". Maybe if he stopped dressing in girl's pants people would be more willing to accept him. My feelings towards him are not entirely negative, however, for he aided me in the acquisition of the sniper as a psychic ally. I don't think I'll ever be certain of just what it was that attracted him to that over-dramatic punk, but I am quite grateful nevertheless.
Issues with my other personalities aside, I am extremely proud to say that I have officially gained adequate footing within my therapy sessions. They have now been lessened to 4 times a week rather than 6 and the old bat has granted leniency with the topics discussed during those sessions. She is slowly but surely falling prey to my charm and soon shall be captured under my influence. Once she has been secured it will take little effort to dispose of the other delinquents within this prison. That day approaches soon and I must be prepared for it.
Now to return to the sordid tale that was my life-- Hm, it appears that the depressing fool has rubbed off on me more than I am comfortable with. I will discipline him later. For now I pick up where I so abruptly left off: I had to begin my training to become the most powerful being in both human and demon world so as to enact my revenge on the baby prince as well as his insolent king father. However, convincing Itsuki to allow me to depart singularly, he proved incorrigible and would not let me out of his sight until I agreed to take him along. I believe it to be the work of that terrible woman. The mere thought of her hands touching what should exclusively be mine sends me into a fit of rage. If it were possible I would de-hair every inch of her body with a pair of tweezers then slowly, starting at the feet, burn off every inch of her skin. I would of course, defile her corpse with my urine as I planned to with the baby prince, but only for affect. She's not even worthy to carry my waste.
I will allow her one once of gratitude for having Itsuki by my side proved useful. During my days of training he was an excellent sparring partner and by night an equally excellent lover. Those steamy nights in demon world were more satisfying than any power I had gained in the daytime. I shiver at the thought of his hands running up and down my body, finding my most pleasurable spots and relentlessly stimulating them till I cried ou--
It appears that lights out has arrived sooner than anticipated and I must comply lest I be drugged yet again. Till next time my dear bane of existence.
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Day 23, Tuesday
I just read over the entry from Saturday and I'm almost impressed with Sensu-kun. I didn't know he was such a hentai:heart: It's rather cute actually just how much he loves Itsu-koi, but he never pays attention to him. How frustrating! Well I don't really have anything interesting to talk about today. Nothing ever happens around here; just the same boring routine every single day! And there aren't any other girl's in this ward so I can't even dress up when I'm in control. It's kind of depressing.
Wait-- who's that? Excuse me diary, I'll be right back!
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So the verdict is, there is another "girl" around! He's a demon transvestite and he is soo cute:heart:heart:heart: He does have that little problem of setting fire to any and everything, but that's not much of a problem. The pissy bastard plays with fire whenever he gets a chance so we're all quite used to it. Actually they'd probably be really great friends. Anyway, he told me he had some great outfits that should fit me-- and the earrings he had? Totally to die for! You'd think I'd gone to heaven or something! This has turned out to be SUCH a good day.
Well diary, I will see you again as soon as possible! Much love:heart:
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Day 24, Wednesday
I hate her. She embellished each page of this journal with a myriad of hearts in pink and purple ink. Damn her to the lowest levels of hell. She will pay for her indiscretions once I expel her from my body. Oh yes, and I will be able to rid myself of her being for the old man in the activity room told me so. He too truly understands the strain the existence of human's has put on the world and believes that the quick and efficient eradication of them all is the only way to achieve true goodness and peace on earth. I have come to trust him in the last few days as we discussed the deplorable nature of society. I hadn't realized they'd imprisoned someone of such competence in here besides myself. I vow to spare his life on the day of my escape.
I choose now to return to my tale so as to not waste any more of my precious time before another mandatory procedure that means little to me.
After I felt that my training was complete, or more specifically I had attained power similar to a god's, I began my search for the most powerful psychics in the human world. Using demons could have helped me achieve my goal much more quickly, but my original goal had been to lure the Kuwa-chan into the fold with the others and use my influence over him to unleash demons into the human plane. As it turned out, it wasn't so easy. While I ventured out on my quest I asked Itsuki, and quite painfully I might add, to call on his demon brethren to detract attention away from my activities. Unfortunately that meant having to be separated from him for months to years with little to no communications between us. It proved difficult to not dwell on the perfection that he was. And I did so delight in watching him work. That powerful stance he held when dealing with others of his kind. Legs spread just wide enough apart to allow my knee to slip between them--
Dammit. Meal time, yet again. I am displeased.
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Day 26, Friday
Ooo, what a fine feast that proved to be! It appears that it was our therapist's birthday and the staff saw fight to throw her a party of sorts. All in all it was quite invigorating. What proved most impressive was the array of fine French cakes they had specially ordered straight from Paris. I could tell from the fine craftsman ship and perfect flavor harmony. Ahh to return to Paris. Of course that's impossible right now, because I'm still banned. So what if I misjudged the trajectory of that explosive and ended up destroying a suburb or 20? They were all going to die anyway right after the main guy unleashed demons on their sorry asses!
Well that's alright. My calculations tell me that in exactly 20 days, 8 hours, 57 minutes and 38.26 seconds our stay here shall reach it's climax and we will most certainly be freed. I've taken all outside force into consideration and I'm positive everything will work out just like the boss planned!
Of course, only fools are positive, but let's not tell him that, yeah? I find this lot here to be rather interesting and fun to mess with. I just love telling the bipolar kid his mother died when's he's having a high day. Seeing his face fall brings me extreme pleasure. XD He's always so cranky around me and takes a swing at me sometimes, but he should know by now that I'm much stronger than him and that I've got all the orderlies wrapped around my little finger. they just looooove me! XDDD
I tire of writing and I just saw my favorite bipolar fuck-around-toy walk into the bathroom. Let the games begin. :D
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Day 27, Saturday
Dammit. I miscalculated and went to far. The bastard drowned in his own vomit before I got a chance to play with him more. Now they've stuck me in solitary confinement for the rest of the week. Oh fun and joy. And I get the distinct feeling that the rest of the blokes aren't too pleased with me either. Phe, they'll forgive me soon enough.
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Day 28, Sunday
I spent the rest of yesterday and part of today reading through this thing and I've found the information inside to be quite intriguing. So that's what the old hag was blabbering about during those therapy sessions! We've been labeled as a bloody sex offender! Ha ha! I told the boss to keep his hands to himself- that it would lead to his ultimate ruin-- but the bloke just couldn't control himself! Haha!
Phew, I think I just about died laughing. Bet the orderlies think I've cracked and they'd be bloody right. No one in their right mind would have all these extra blokes running around in their head unless they were mad. Hm, I guess everyone's a little mad sometimes...
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Day 34, Saturday
Alright, I get it! I BLOODY GET IT!
I was a stupid git! But it wasn't just me, understand? He said he was willing so I assumed he was willing! If a bloke says that then he must be willing! How was I supposed to know he had some wonky disease that made his growth patterns all bonkers? He looked legal and his twin did too! Hmph, bloody threw my calculations off, then had the nerve to tell me "i don't want it, my twin did!" Well it bloody serves them right for not thinking the same damned thing!
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... Okay, so it wasn't their fault.. I just like twins. And I knew they were 14, but hey they did look kind of old for their age. Oh well, the important thing to know is that I wasn't the one who got us caught. I calculated just how much time I'd need to, uh, 'sample their fruits' and I came away from that encounter unscathed. Besides, the blokes were French and everyone knows there's a whole lot of whores residing in that country. Heh. Probably would've been better had they gone at it though-- I mean they were so gay like those twins in that one book. Harry something I think it was. He should fuck those twins. Yeaaaaahh.:wink:
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Day 35, Sunday
It appears that one of my lesser personalities landed me in solitary confinement for a week. I appreciate that he took full responsibility for his actions and spent the duration of it in control, but he had thereby left me to communicate with that bitch of a woman. Therefore, he will be forbidden from antagonizing the other inmates for quite some time. No matter, for I have little time to waste. I feel my escape approaching near. Indeed, it could be any day now and I wish to complete this sordid autobiography before my time here is through. Who knows, I might feel the urge to publish it one day like any defender of purity would.
My quest for powerful psychics began with the doctor. He was fairly easy to attract for he found great pleasure in causing people spirit-crushing pain as does the side of me that enjoys shooting kittens just to hear them 'go splat' as they explode. I found that to be an odd pairing but thought nothing more of it.
Hm. I wonder know if these people have mistaken my so-called offenses for a consensual relationship with an older man. If so, then why is it I that am being punished so severely for the indiscretions of another? I know in my heart that I have committed no such offenses against any child in my lifetime. Sadly, I am unable to vouch for the others that reside within me, but I am quite certain that they have maintained an equally spotless record. I--
God forsaken light's out! I will return as swiftly as possible. Till we me--
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Day 36, Monday
Ahem. I was interrupted last night by the light's most abrupt departure and so too by the rather burly orderly who took it upon herself to "guide" me to my bed and "tuck me in". The distaste I feel for that particular woman almost overshadows my hatred for the "female" that resides inside of me. I will be sure to make both of their deaths particularly nasty ones.
To continue: I enlisted the skills of one of my lesser personalities to lure Gourmet into our fold. Odd that we discovered the brute wandering around Paris, but no matter. I knew that I would need his skills at some point in my operation and was pleased to have him. Hm, I do recall a conversation we had in which he spoke of a pair of male twins up for sale. He presented the offer to me as though I should have found it enticing, but as I have told the old bat, the various staff, and any and every being residing here and willing to listen, never in my life did I inappropriately touch a human being younger than myself nor do I take any perverse interest in doing so. As deranged as I may be with these extraneous personalities, I am quite sane in all other aspects.
Well, despite the rather awkward conversation held with him that otherwise not memorable day, Gourmet proved to be a valued addition to our team.
Our next member was attracted by my dearest ototo. One kind word and a smile was all it took for the two to be joined at the hip. I often had to let ototo take control so as to sate the game master's need to be with his best friend. Their relationship was adorable to say the least, and allowed me full control over the child. I never thought he'd be loyal (or foolish) enough to fight a game to the death with the rekai. I am.. disappointed that he died but mostly for my ototo's sake. I do wonder, even now, why they enjoyed "sleep overs" so much. What could be so intriguing about sleeping in the same bed with another person at that age, lest there be something truly wrong with the children? I will have to leave a note for ototo requesting an explanation.
As for our last member, I can't quite remember which of us gained his trust and brought him over to our way of living, but I do remember it going a great deal more smoothly than any of the acquisitions previous. What I do recall is how weak he appeared to be. So unbelievably incapable of standing up for himself that I was tempted to inquire as to his true gender. Surely someone so-- pansy as he had to be a woman.
Ah! It was she that gained his trust! Such a lapse in judgment could only come from a woman. Hn. She will pay for the innumerable problems she has caused for me since her creation. Damn that woman.
I shall take a break in my tale at this point, for I do believe a shower is in order. I feel a bit... musty after dealing with that beast of a nurse.
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Day 38, Wednesday
Mood: depressed :(
i can't believe he forgot! he totally mentioned everyone else, but he left me out. i got him the sniper but he completely forgot that i helped him get what he wanted. i'm so depressed. i might as well kill myself today. not even the rain is around to sympathize with me. what a black empty soul I have now...
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i turned on some goth rock, stuff that i can really identify with, and i've calmed down some. it's not like i care what sensui thinks anyway.
listening to music always makes me feel introspective and really deep about the world and stuff. i had a really good friend once. he liked to slit his wrist everyday just to see the blood come out. he taught me how to cut myself really good. he's gone now. all that's left is a sordid memory twisted with darkness and sex. sigh i'd miss him if i cared, but i, like, don't. and i don't care that sensui destroyed the village he lived in and all of my other friends! It's his damned fault I'm so depressed all the time! he took all that time to personally blow the hell out of everyone's head there, but he won't even take the time to mention that i exist! i fucking hate him!
oh god diary, i can't talk to you anymore or he might kill you too sobs
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Day 39, Thursday
Oh, that bastard! He left the poor emo boy out of his "tale" entirely! And he forgot to mention how sexy the sniper was! I'll have to give him a piece of my mind next time I see him. He's almost becoming as bad as the bastard who cusses all the effing time and he fucked a dog once! Well damn them both! I am so sick and tired of all the shit I have to go through just to make them happy. I'm always keeping Itsuki amused just so he won't leave this Sensui's skinny ass! I don't even like men that much! Sure Itsu-koi's super hot, b-but... he'd be so much sexier if he were younger... and not so muscular... I wish I could find some true happiness in my life, but the others just keep weighing me down. All I want to do is find a nice orphanage with lots of little boys and love on them till they're old enough to leave the nest. I just want to be a Mom!
Oh fuck it! I need some damned chocolate!
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Day 40, Fuckday
The fuck is she fucking saying? I did not fuck a fucking dog once!
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... I fucked it twice... and the bitch fucking liked it! Fuck yeah! At least I don't jack off to fucking wine mags like that one faggot. Heh, he's such a fucking queer. He fucked twins. Hot twins... not like I'm fucking queer or anything, they were just really fucking hot! Mmm what two fine pieces of ass! Just like that one kid. Kuwa-fucker or something. Man he had a fucking TIGHT fucking ass! Could've ridden that thing all fucking day. Fuck I gotta go use the can.
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Day 41, Saturday
That uneducated brute! I do not jack off to my wine catalogues. I merely enjoy them thoroughly from cover to cover. I wish to be educated unlike that poor human specimen. He does have one thing right though. That Kuwabara fellow did have a fine physique and it would've been nice to calculate how loud he would scream. I've taken some preliminary measurements and have the outcome within 2 or 3 decibels. Too bad I didn't get to test my hypothesis.
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day 42, sunday
aniki left me a note so now I'm going to answer it.
Umm... me and gamemaster liked sleeping over cause we'd do the kissy stuffs. I liked doing those stuffs a lot and he said he did too. And sometimes on extra special days we'd pull down our pants and-- yay cake! They have cake in the food place!
Bye bye journal!
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Day 43, Monday
Mood: happy
The wind whips past my face in the darkness
I feel no sadness only glee at the coming storm
I am at home in the darkness for it understands
It approaches swiftly and sweeps me into it's dark embrace
Pain, anguish, fear is all gone for now I am one with the darkness
Goodbye cruel world :)
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Day 46, Thursday
It appears that I was drugged yet again by the fault of another of my personalities. I am currently unsure as to which of them is the culprit but what they did to my body is totally unacceptable. I awoke this morning to see long slits trailing up my forearms. The imbeciles that inhabit this prison believe that I attempted to kill myself. I did no such thing and will not be plead guilty for an act that I took no part in. Hm, must have been that woman again. I was bedecked in various types of black jewelry when I awoke. I do wish to eliminate her.
I would like to reiterate yet again that I never touched any being younger than myself in an inappropriate manner. Any and every act performed on any individuals of the aforementioned category were not only legal but consensual as well. Therefore I maintain my innocence of the crimes I have been charged with and will continue to do so until the day that this earth perishes.
In spite of all their accusations I find myself taking a more introspective look at the time we kept that rekai captive. Kuwabara had a remarkably strong spirit-- the type that any lesser evil villain would delight in breaking. I, however, prefer those bearing such extraordinary qualities to remain fully intact till my use of them is complete. He was such a fine specimen of human being, what with his muscular physique and masculine features. He could've passed for 20 easily with his ruggedly handsome face. Itsuki agreed with me in that aspect and I quite often found him staring at Kuwabara with a predatory gleam in his eyes. Not that I minded, for I too felt a strange attraction to the young man. It couldn't be helped.
Itsuki wasn't the only one lusting after the orange haired brute. Gourmet was quite taken with him and spent much of the remainder of his life planning out different forms of bondage Kuwa could be placed in. It was quite a delight to watch as well. He'd done this to countless young men and women during his time with me, but none of them had ever struck us the same way Kuwa-chan did. He looked so unbelievably adorable bound and gagged, resting next to me. Itsuki and I both agree that he made a far better companion than the others had. And he was so much sexier than the others. Kuwa-chan had sex appeal that could rival that of my dear Itsuki. To bed them both would have been a wet dream come to life.
To touch that firm heated flesh would send me into the throes of ecstasy. And with my long time lover at my side we could make him produce the sweetest sounds.
Pardon me for I seemed to have lost myself in events long passed. However, lingering on the perfection that is Kuwa-chan has lead me to realize the key reason to why I am addressed as an 'offender'. I'll admit that Kuwa-chan was underage during our time spent together, but so where the various others during my lifetime and neither I nor Itsuki were ever punished for our actions towards them. But Kuwa-chan, as with all of the others, was quite willing and I hold steadfast to that fact. Had they not been we most surely would have ceased our actions and released them.
Though in the case of Kuwa-chan it would have proved quite difficult to release him based on how much he knew of my plans. Had I not needed his direct involvement I would have released him from my loving caresses when he'd asked me to, but alas I could not and now I'm being called an offender.
It seems that I wasn't a sex offender until I got caught by one Yusuke Urameshi. Damn him. I will be sure to make his death most painful-- even more so than the others I scorn so fervently.
The dinner hour draws near as does the day of my escape. I will write again once I have reached safety.
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Day unknown
I must be quick in this last entry for I don't have much time. For the last 40 or so days my other selves and I have been writing in this book not knowing that each entry was read by our therapist. Being the dear old woman she is, she thought it best to present it to the proper authorities and has, in a sense, turned us into the police. If it were the normal human authorities I would not be concerned, but I sense great power and anger approaching even as I write. It must be none other than those powerful spirit detectives I have heard so much about and I fear for my life.
I have decided to take my last moments on earth to apologize for the indiscretions of my other personalities. More specifically those of Shinobu-san. I know that in essence we are the same person, separated only by the date of that terrible mission, but I am appalled at "my" past actions and I feel somewhat responsible. Had I been able to break free I would have been able to spare countless individuals a lot of pain. Unfortunately I couldn't and now... Now I must face the wrath Urameshi Yusuke, the most obvious lover of Kuwabara Kazuma and the one individual
we shouldn't have touched.
I feel Urameshi and his other team members approaching, so I must wrap this up quickly. I apologize to anyone we have injured, physically or mentally, in our lifetime. And... Matari does indeed have a vagina...
...sooo what'd you think? terrible, ne:D does excited dance i might get flamed this time! XDDD
well.. um... right the personalities in order of appearance: sensui, the pissy one, the woman, the lil kid, the emo, the british whackjob, and innocent sensui
innocent sensui only shows up once and he's basically what sensui used to be before he went all crazy-like. and as for the woman thing: many mpd patients have at least one personality that is the opposite sex.
hmm... that should be about it really... if you have any questions leave your e-mail and i'll answer them. is tired