Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi what-so-ever, blah blah blah, ya'll know the drill.
Author's Note: Just a little EmJay in honor of Valentine's Day. Not my best work, but please review. I love finding out what ya'll think :)
Candy Heart Kisses
Valentine's Day.
What a crock of shit.
Jay Hogart didn't do Valentine's Day. He didn't buy the stupid flowers or sugary candies. He didn't care that he didn't have a "Valentine".
He didn't.
So why did he find himself feeling even lonlier today, than most days? Why did he find himself wanting to punch his best friend, Sean, in that smug face of his as he yapped in his ear about the plans he had with his on-again/off-again girlfriend, Emma Nelson? Unable to listen to one more second of Sean's jibbering, Jay threw the wrench he held in hand at the wall. With a resounding crash it dropped to the floor, as Jay stormed out of the shop, leaving a gawking Sean behind him.
Jay went around the building to the small alley in the back. He pulled his ciggarettes out of his shirt pocket and raised one to his lips. He lit the ciggarette, inhaling the sweet smoke. Closing his eyes, he remembered Valentine's Day two years ago, when and Alex had still be together. The two had rented a bunch of cheesy horror films and made fun of all the saps that were out eating expensive dinners and buying into all the commercial bullshit.
He missed those days.
Thinking about it now, he realized he didn't really miss Alex. He missed the idea of Alex. He simply missed having someone there that he could call his own. He tended to feel like the odd man out lately. Sean had a girlfriend, this week anyways, Towerz had a girlfriend, even that loser Spinner had Darcy. Jay was so lost in his thoughts he didn't hear the sound of footsteps approaching him or the small blonde that leaned against the brick wall next to him.
"Needed to escape for a bit?"
Jay's eyes flew open and his head swung around to face this girl who dared intrude on his man-sulking, he prefered to call it brooding.
"Oh, it's just you," Jay smirked, taking another drag of his ciggarette.
"You know, those things'll kill you," she said softly.
Jay wanted to bit back at her with some scathing remark, but her found himself unable to. Her tone lacked the usual prissiness that she would usually use when addressing him and her eyes seemed dull today, rather than sparkling as they usually were. So he simply quirked a single eyebrow at her instead and held the offending ciggarette out to her.
Surprisingly, she reached out and took it from his hands, bring it to her lips she breathed in deeply.
"You're just full of surprises aren't you green peace?"
Emma laughed, letting the smoke billow out as she did so. She handed the smoke back to Jay, as she swept a stray peice of blonde hair from her face.
"So, tell me Jay. Why does the big bad look so sad today?"
"What's it to you?" Jay asked her, bitterly. He really didn't feel like opening up his soul, or whatever bullshit she would try to make him do. Telling green peace that he was feeling lonely wasn't exactly on his list of things to do.
"Sean's inside. You know...your boyfriend?" Jay said, sarcastically, hoping she would just go away.
"Yeah, well...I'm not exactly thrilled about tonight," Emma sighed.
"Oh, but isn't Seanny boy taking you out some where super duper? He was telling me he always has a totally awesome present for you!" Jay said in a fake chipper voice.
"Yeah, well, it's not like that's just going to make everything better, now is it?" Emma questioned, her eyes turning to ice.
"What are you talking about?" Jay asked, curiously, realizing Emma was pissed at Sean for some reason or another. A smirk formed on his lips as he thought about how she probably saw Sean throw a soda can on her precious ground, rather than in a trash can.
"Like you don't know, Jay," Emma shot at him, daggers flying from her eyes.
"Uh, I really have no clue what you're talking about smart one," Jay told her, scratching his head.
"All his late nights at work," she said, making air quotes with her fingers.
"Uh..."
"He's been at the ravine, Jay. I know, okay, so don't even try to deny it for him. Alex came to my house yesterday; said she thought I deserved to know," Emma's bottom lip began to quiver, tears filling her chocolate orbs.
"Emma, I seriously had no idea. I haven't been to the ravine in...well awhile. I wouldn't know who went there or who didn't," Jay defended himself, utter shock that Sean would cheat on his precious Emma.
The blonde stared at Jay hard. Most of the words that came out of his lips were lies, but for some reason she felt herself believing him. There really was no reason for him to be lying to her about this. She knew he and Sean were still on somewhat of rocky terrain since Sean had found out about what happened between Jay and Emma.
"I'm surprised you haven't called him out on it already. Ripped him a new one," Jay told her, offering her a ciggarette from his pack as he lit a new one up for himself.
"Yeah. Last year I probably would have, but...I don't know. Manny moved out and she and I aren't talking anymore. JT's...gone. I don't really have anyone besides him. Better a cheating, scum-bag boyfriend than having no one at all, right?" She said bitterly, taking the offered ciggarette and lighting it.
"You're better than that, green peace."
"So, I've heard," she shrugged, dragging a hand throw her golden locks.
"Emma..." Jay paused, considering his words.
"I'm...sorry. For, ya' know, what happened with us...in the ravine," Jay stared at the ground, unable to look her in the eyes.
"It was a long time ago, Jay. Besides, I'm a big girl; I made my own choices," Emma gave him a small smile, letting him know it didn't matter anymore. Jay breathed a sigh of relief; she didn't hate him...she didn't blame him...not anymore.
"It wasn't...just about that. With you, I mean. Ya' know? Um..."
Jay clenched his hands into fists at his sides. How could he explain to her that he hated himself for pulling her into that van? Hated himself for breaking an already broken girl. The old green peace would never let Sean get away with cheating on her and Jay wondered for a moment if he had helped get her to the point where she would just let it slide.
"You know, I always kind of had a soft spot for you, Hogart. Even with all the shit you put me through," Emma told him and he could see this was her way of telling him she understood. She understood how he felt about her, because she felt it too. The two simply stood there, side by side, shoulders barely touching, leaning against the old brick wall.
"I guess you should go in by Sean," Jay finally spoke, after a few minutes of silence.
"Yeah, I probably should," she threw the ciggarette down on the ground, stomping it out wiith the toe of her white sneaker.
"Oh no, green peace! You're polluting Mother Earth! What ever shall we do?" Jay yelled out, in mock outrage. Emma just laughed, not caring that in a small way he'd been making fun of her. Old habits die hard, after all. Still laughing she turned to him, pulling something out of her pocket.
"What do ya' got there, green peace?"
She held out her hand, offering a small candy heart to him. He stared at her for a moment, before reaching out and taking it from her hand. He brought the tiny heart close to him, reading the small inscription.
"Kiss me," he read.
"I thought you'd never ask," she whispered, leaning in and softly pressing her lips to his.
It wasn't a long kiss, by any means, if anyone had seen they would have said that it looked almost platonic, the way her lips barely brushed his, then pulled away a mere second later. To Jay and Emma, though, the kiss meant everything; it was as if coming home after being away for years. It was the missing peice of the puzzle that they'd both been searching for. But as soon as they'd found it, it was lost again.
"What about Sean, Emma?" Jay whispered, still gripping her frail shoulders.
The small girl just shook her head, the tears she'd been holding in her eyes before, now falling down her pale cheeks.
"Hey, don't cry. We'll always have our candy heart kiss," Jay told her gruffly, lifting her chin with a single finger as he brushed her tears away with his other calloused hand.
"Happy Valentine's Day, Jay," Emma said softly as she walked around the building and out of sight, towards her boyfriend inside.
"Happy Valentine's Day, Emma," Jay whispered to the wind, slipping the small candy heart into the pocket of his jump suit.
