Sometimes I wonder why I even try. I always get my hopes up and watch them fall and shatter onto the ground. It really sucks. I really want to meet my Mr. Right but I don't see that happening any time soon. Maybe reading and writing just increases my loneliness. I really just want some guy to sweep me off my feet. Someone attractive with bright blue eyes. Yeah, blue eyes are a weakness for me. I have been hurt so many times. It may be wrong to think that every guy that I have a relationship with for more than a month will be my Mr. Right. I know it's wrong of me to assume that, but I just cannot help it. Well little did I know that I would find my Mr. Right. I'll start from the beginning.
I was all alone at my house and looking at my reflection in the mirror. I watched the tears fall from my eyes and thought about how I should give up trying to find my knight in shining armor when there was a knock at my door. That is so weird, I never get visitors. I open the door to see 3 extremely attractive men in suits. Well, one had a long tan trench coat but it was over a suit.
"Agent John Smith. This is Agent Joe Smith, no relation and Agent Larry Johnson. Sorry to bother you miss, but we have some questions for you." the medium height guy with impressive green eyes said. They showed me FBI badges but all I could do was look into those amazing green eyes. I stepped back to let them all come in. I noticed the really tall guy had incredible sea-green eyes. They were hypnotizing. I finally found my voice and asked them
"Could I get you guys some coffee or tea?" To which the guy in the trench coat just stared. Did I insult him?
"Coffee would be great, thank you." Said the medium height guy. I don't know why, but I didn't believe those were their real names. I poured 3 cups of coffee and a cup of tea. I handed the tea to the guy in the trench coat and he just stared at it. After he took a sip, he stared at me with brilliant blue eyes. What is with these guys with the most intriguing eyes I have ever seen?
We sat down and the guy with the green eyes asked
"How well did you know Jesse Dwindle?" This confused me; Jesse is like the sweetest guy in the world. He comes off as a sort of jerk, but to people who know him knows he would never hurt anyone.
"He is like a brother to me. Although I haven't seen him for a few days, we are extremely close." Why did the FBI want to know all this? The tall guy shared a glance with the guy with the green eyes. Was something going on with Jesse?
"Is Jesse okay? Why is the FBI even curious about Jesse? He is the sweetest guy in the world!" I exclaimed. Green eyes cleared his throat.
"Jesse had an accident. It is thought that he was attacked by some sort of enemy. Would you know if he had any?" OMG Jesse is dead. I dropped my coffee cup and it shattered on the tile floor. I started to hyperventilate. The news hit me like a ton of bricks. I wanted to cry, but I couldn't find tears. I just sat there staring at the broken pieces of my coffee cup. The tall guy then patted my arm. "Hey, I'm sorry we had to break the news to you like this. I understand how shocking this must be for you if you really were as close as you say you were." His voice was gentle and sweet. It made me angry that these guys were in my house and the tears just filled my eyes. For the second time today, tears ran down my face. After a few minutes, I dried my eyes and grabbed a tissue. The crying had given me time to think about any enemies. Only one came to my mind. I looked at the guy in the trench coat. He was staring at me and it seemed as if he was staring into my soul. I sniffled.
"I can't tell you. If I did, you would lock me up into a psycho ward. You wouldn't believe a word I said." It seemed as if this had sparked an interest in all 3 of the strangers in my house.
"We deal with crazy stories every day. We live crazy lives. Believe me when I tell you that we will believe every word you say" said the tall guy with the same gentle voice as before. I looked up at him and took a chance.
"The only enemy that comes to my mind is..." I pause, not sure if I can go through with this. "He goes by Billy. He's a... uhh... he's a demon." I tell them, not looking into their eyes. They but really believe I'm crazy now. The tall guy and green eyes shared a look.
"How do you know about Billy?" Green eyes asked me.
"I've already said too much. You guys should go" I told them. When Billy finds out that I told on him, he would kill me. The guys nodded, but Trench coat guy just stared at me.
"You're scared. He is going to come after you, right?" He asked me. I felt uncomfortable under his stare. I just nodded, tears again welling up in my eyes. I went to the door and held it open to them. They understood and walked out. Immediately, I put a salt line around every entrance to my house. Every door, window, crack, air vent, just everything! I could not risk Billy coming in here. It isn't my life that I'm scared for. It's the little 4 month old baby girl in the other room. She wasn't mine. Jesse just showed up at my door one day with her in his arms. He looked terrified. He asked me to take care of her because she was his niece. Her parents were murdered and he could not take care of her. That was when she was only about a month old. I agreed of course, because I always agreed to anything Jesse asked me. Her name was Zarah. I hear her crying in the other room. She must be hungry. When I walked into the room, I see figures at the window. Immediately I grab my Winchester rifle and aim it at the person coming through my window. When he looked up, he was staring down the barrel of my gun.
"Whoa, I expected you to be in bed." The guy said, holding his hands up.
"I was, but my baby was crying." And with that I pulled him to his feet. He looked at me and smiled. Then he pulled me close to him and hugged me tight. I did not return the hug.
"The FBI were here looking for you Jesse! I thought you were dead!" I screamed, punching his arm. I then picked up Zarah and took her into the kitchen.
"Hey, I had to make something up. But apparently there are hunters in town looking for me. They have an angel with them." He says as he pulls a soda out of my fridge. I start to feed Zarah when he looks me in the eyes. He makes my heart skip a beat. "I told them about Billy." I said, looking away. He started choking on the soda. "WHAT?! HE IS GOING TO MURDER YOU LJ!" He shouts, upsetting Zarah. I glare at him.
"Keep your voice down. And he won't. The FBI guys were probably the hunters and are hunting Billy down right now. They really were interested in your death." I tell him. He runs his fingers through his chocolate brown hair.
"Let me guess, one was really tall and extremely nice, one was of medium height and was straightforward, and the other wore a trench coat?" I was shocked he got every detail right. I looked at him and nodded. His bright sky blue eyes pierced my soul. He put his hands on his face.
"LJ, those were the Winchesters! They had Castiel the angel with them! Do you know how screwed I am when they realize I am alive!?" I just ignored him and focused in feeding Zarah. The next day, I awoke to the crying of Zarah. As I was feeding her my doorbell rang. I opened the door to see the 2 FBI guys, green eyes and the tall guy. I waved them in and walked straight into the kitchen to finish up with Zarah. "Aww she is adorable! What is her name?" Green eyes asked me.
"Zarah. She is almost 5 months old." I told him.
"Well, let's cut to the chase. We know who you are." Green eyes said. I felt a chill go down my back. If these really are the Winchesters and they know who I am... I just looked at them and gave what I hoped was a confused face.
"Listen sweetheart, we know that Jesse is alive. He was here last night and we saw him." The tall guy said. This was when I stood up straight.
"Well, if we are going to be honest, I know you guys are the Winchesters and that you are hunters." I said right away. They both stiffened and stared at me. I kept a straight face. I cleaned Zarah up and put her in a little jumper so she could play. "When did you figure that out?" Green eyes asked. I looked straight into his incredible green eyes and said,
"I knew you guys weren't FBI right away. But I did not know you were the Winchesters until Jesse told me." They shared similar looks.
"Well, I'm Sam, this is Dean. So now you know who is who." the tall guy, Sam, said. I smiled. Then I felt my eyes widen. When I looked behind them, I saw Billy pull up in his car. Shit! Sam and Dean turn around and Billy walks up to my door. He looks down at the salt line.
"LJ I find this racist! And useless." He says, conjuring up a wind to blow away the salt. He walks right past the Winchesters and sets his eyes on Zarah.
"Who is this little cutie?" He asked me. I instinctively move between them, not even thinking. He is not touching my baby! He narrowed his eyes at me. With the flick of his wrist, I was thrown across the room. I immediately got up, and ran back. I desperately looked at the Winchesters, but they weren't there.
"Oh your boys? They are outside with some of my friends. I wanted to talk to you alone." He looks down at Zarah and picks her up. Every instinct in my head was screaming at me to get her away from him no matter the cost. Oh trust me, I tried. Every time I got close, Billy would throw me across the room.
"LJ, don't you trust me?" He asked. My eyes were focused on Zarah. He glared at me.
"LOOK AT ME!" He screamed, making Zarah cry. He tried to make her stop.
"Hand her to me, I can make her stop crying." I said, surprised that my voice didn't shake a bit. He wasn't listening to me. I went up and finally was able to snatch her out of his hands. He stared at her menacingly. I held her and she quieted down.
"Worthless." He muttered. He then focused on me. He walked up to me and ran his hand across my cheek.
"Why do you protect that thing? Is it because Jesse asked you to?" He asked, staring at me. I was wiping Zarah's tears. I nodded, assuming he wanted an answer.
"Where is Jesse? I know he isn't dead." I glanced up; shocked that Billy knew Jesse was alive. "Are you going to answer me or do I have to break that things small little neck?" This horrified me. I held her closer to my chest.
"I honestly have no idea where Jesse is. I promise you." I told him with a shaky voice. Sam burst through the door then. He looked at me with pain in his eyes.
"Step away from her" he commanded with strength to his voice. He sounded more menacing than he looked. Billy laughed and pulled me to him, pressing a knife to my throat.
"Come any closer and she is dead." I felt my eyes widen and Zarah began to whimper. Sam looked at me with sorrow in his eyes. I felt a sudden release and rushed toward Sam. He pulled me close and began to rush me away. I turn to see why Billy released me and saw Castiel with his hand on Billy's head. He started to glow and collapsed to the floor. When we got outside, I saw Dean and Jesse both fighting demons. Cas appeared then and killed them both easily.
"Get to the impala. All of you" he commanded. We listened. Dean got in and floored it. Jesse pulled me close and held me as I began to cry. Zarah was staring at me with bright blue eyes. The worst part was over. I awoke to being in a bed with Zarah staring at me. The room was empty. I did not recognize the room and I did not have any idea of what had happened the previous night. I quickly sat up and listened. I heard a shower go off. Zarah started to whine, so I laid back down with her and she went silent. I pretended to be asleep when I heard the bathroom door open. Through my eyelashes, saw Sam in just a towel and everything came rushing back. I sat straight up as if I had just awoken from a nightmare. Sam rushed to my side, still damp from his shower. "You're okay, you're safe." He told me, placing a hand on my shoulder. I stared at him with wide eyes and tried to slow my breathing.
"Thank you for everything" I told him and smiled. He got up and smiled back at me. He was truly gorgeous. Zarah started to cry so I picked her up. I held her tightly to my chest. She stared at me, tears vanishing. I smiled down at her. The door opened and Dean walked in followed by Jesse. Jesse was carrying some grocery bags. He handed one to me. I looked inside and saw baby food. I smiled at him and he kissed me on the cheek. He had never kissed me before and I blushed bright red. Sam coughed and I quickly looked over. Then he went back into the bathroom. When he came back out, he was fully clothed.
"So uhh how long have you two been together?" Dean asked. I gave him a confused look, and then laughed.
"We are not together. We are just friends." I said, opening up some food for Zarah. Dean was about to speak again, but then looked outside. "We gotta move, fast!" He exclaimed.
He picked up a duffel bag and headed out the door, Jesse at his heels. Sam helped me get Zarah and the food, and then grabbed his duffel bag and we were out the door. Once outside, I saw why Dean wanted to go so quickly... In the distance there was a big black cloud. Regular people would believe that a storm is on its way. Hunters know that demons are on their way. I have an ominous feeling that they are after us. I wake up in a cold sweat. I look around me, hoping that I just dreamed everything. Then I realized I was in a cage. OMG where is Zarah!? I open my eyes and start looking around, then I see that she is cuddled up with Sam. That is such a cute picture! I think. Then I shake my head to clear my thoughts. I try to remember what happened. Okay, so we were kidnapped by Billy's minions? And… Billy is alive! That last thought sends a shiver down my spine. I get lost in my thoughts, but come back to reality when I hear a loud click. I could not find where the noise had come from. I quickly glance around the room and press myself as far back as I can. I hear a buzzing sound, and suddenly my cage starts moving up. I look out through the side of my cage and above me, a door has opened letting in a dark, ominous red light. When I cross the thresh hold, I see figures all around me. I realize that I am being judged by something and immediately feel incredibly self conscious. Now I realize why those dogs in the shelter are so scared. Being approached by strangers, in a loud, strange and obnoxious place. I was shivering, but it wasn't from the cold. I get curious and move toward the door of my cage just to see who, or what these things are, but immediately jump right back to where I was because something hit the door. The sound made my ears ring and my heart was beating a mile a minute. All I wanted to do was be with my baby. Then I see a familiar face. Billy. He walks up to me and smiles a dark, carnivorous smile. His breath is horrendous and makes me gag. He puts his fingers through the mesh of the fence and I lift up my feet and with all my might I slam them against his fingers. Blood squirts onto my face, but a smug grin was all I felt. He stared at me, anger boiling up inside him. I can see the rage in his eyes and I do the most childish thing I could think of; I stick out my tongue at him. He glares at me and holds his fingers to his chest, covered by his other hand. What I didn't realize was that I had just made everything worse.
Billy ripped the cage door open and grabbed me by my hair. He yanked me out onto the floor and I landed with a hard thud. He then picked me up by my neck squeezing every breath out of me. As I struggled to get air, he sent me flying backwards. I hit my head against a wall and blacked out for a few minutes. I saw him coming toward me, but I was reluctant to get up. The only thing that got me up was thinking about how if I stayed down, he would kill me for sure. I stood up, unsteady at first, but slowly gaining strength. He came towards me, but I sent a hard kick right to his crotch. He went down and curled up in the fetal position. He was crying in agony and I thought I had won. I started to look for a way out and as I took a step backward, Billy grabbed my ankle and yanked me towards him. I landed flat on my back, knocking every breath right out of me. I laid on my back trying to convince my breath to come back. I finally got it back when I saw Billy standing over me. Again, he grabbed my hair and yanked me to my feet. He smiled his carnivorous smile and again sent me flying through the air. I hit what felt like a rock. Billy walked over to me and stared at my hand. He brought his boot down on my wrist sending an excruciating pain throughout my whole arm. He stomped again and again, making me scream. My wrist was definitely broken. He leaned over and picked me up by my wrist. I screamed again in pain, only to be thrown across the room. This time when my head hit, I went unconscious. I welcomed the blackness swallowing me whole, mainly because it took the pain away.
I awoke to a white room. My right hand felt heavy and when I looked at it, there was a cast on my hand. Why did I have a cast on my hand?
"LJ? Are you okay?" I hear a male voice ask. Was he talking to me? Is LJ my name? I look up and see a muscular male in a plaid shirt holding an adorable baby girl. They looked vaguely familiar, but I could not put a name to either face. Two more guys walked in; one in a leather jacket and the other in a long tan trench coat. Did I know these people?
"Hey LJ! How ya feeling?" the guy in the leather ask me. He walked over to me, but I recoiled from him. He looked at me confused, then turned to the guy in the plaid.
"What happened? Why is she scared of me?" The guy in the leather asked the guy in the plaid.
"I am not quite sure. Amnesia maybe?" he responded. Amnesia? I have amnesia!? Another guy walked into the room. He had surfer style chocolate brown hair and eyes bluer than the sky. He smiled at me and strutted right over. He leaned over and went to kiss my cheek, but I moved away from him. He looked at me confused. I don't know why, but I didn't trust this sexy guy. I looked over at the guy in the plaid holding the baby. She reached out to me.
"Ma-ma-ma-ma-ma!" she cried. I looked at her with tears in my eyes. Is this child mine?
"What's her name?" I asked the guy in the plaid. His head snapped up and he stared at me.
"You don't remember? Her name is Zarah." He told me. She kept reaching for me, and finally the guy put her in my arms. Zarah. She nuzzled up to me and started to giggle. She grabbed my hair and played with it. The guy in the trench coat spoke up.
"LJ, give her back to Sam. I can help you, but it will be painful and I do not want the little human to get hurt in any way." He said. I was confused, but handed Zarah back to the guy in plaid, Sam I guess. Trench coat guy walks up to me.
"Do you trust me?" He asked. I nodded. I don't know why I trusted him, but I did. Next thing I know, his hand is on my head and I see a bright white light. It was brighter than the sun, yet I was not going blind. My body felt as if I were being struck by lightning. It felt as though there were needles in my skin trying to push their way out. As quickly as it came, it vanished. Then, memories came flooding back, overwhelming me. I heard Jesse screaming at Cas and telling him that he is an idiot. My mind goes blank, and all I see is darkness.
I open my eyes and look directly at Jesse. He rushes up to me and grabs my good hand. He looks at me with concern. I yank my hand back and smack him across the face. He jumps back, shocked and I take my chance. I jump out of bed and start strangling him with my good hand and I am hitting him with my cast hand. Sam pulls me off of Jesse. Tears roll down my face as I hiccup and try to regain control. Dean helps Jesse up and looks at me.
"What the hell was that for!?" Jesse screams at me. My body is trembling as I narrow my eyes.
"How could you?" I whisper, not looking at him. Sam was holding Zarah with one hand and me with the other. I looked at her, then at Jesse.
"You bastard!" I scream, lunging for him again. I hit him in the nose, making it gush blood. Sam grabs me then and I collapse in his arms. When I regain my strength again, I look Jesse straight in the eyes.
"You thought you could keep it from me. Well, I remember everything!" I exclaim to him. Sam turns me to look at him and I see that Cas is now holding Zarah.
"Tell me, what has gotten into you?" He asks me gently. I stare at him.
"Jesse… He was my boyfriend. He got me pregnant with Zarah. After she was born, he found Billy, thinking he was an angel. He told Billy to make me forget everything, the relationship, the baby…. Just everything." I choked on my tears. I turned back to Jesse who now wears a shocked expression.
"You are working for him, leading him to me and Zarah. You betrayed me. You lied to me. You used me!" I scream. I try to lunge at him again, but Sam has gotten wiser and holds me tight. Then Dean does the unthinkable and lets Jesse go. Jesse bolts, but Cas appears in front of him. He looks at Sam and Dean, who is now holding my baby.
"Get them out of here. I have some unfinished business to take care of." He says. Sam lifts me off my feet and carries me out the room, Dean and Zarah right behind him. When we get outside, I hear a loud scream and I look over Sam's shoulder. I see a flash of light in the room we must have just left. One shadowed figure drops to the floor. We get to the Impala and Cas is there waiting for us.
I climb in the back of the Impala and lay my head against the cool glass. I feel Sam climb in behind me with Zarah in his arms. I pull away from the window and see the greasiness from my head stay behind. With my good hand, I drag my hand against the window. I take a deep breath I let my head fall back, leaning against the back seat. Zarah crawls into my lap puts her little baby hands on my face wiping away my tears. I hold her up with my good hand and smile lovingly at my daughter. "Somehow, I think I always knew." I whisper mindlessly. I could feel Sam's eyes on me and Zarah, but I just let my body fall against him. Zarah slowly closes her eyes and falls asleep in my arms. "Hey, you alright?" Sam asks me. Honestly, I was fine. Just drained. I nod my head and cuddle closer to him. I feel the cut of his muscles as he wraps his arm around me and Zarah. I have a feeling he is going to be a great daddy. I smile up at him and he kisses me square on the mouth. "I love you LJ." He whispers in my ear. "I love you too, Mr. Right."