Title: like that stupid police song
Pairing: Puck/Rachel
Rating: PG-13.
Spoilers/Warning: "Mash Up"; for the sake of this the scene at the bleachers didn't happen. Fluffy oneshot.
Summary: Dating Rachel Berry was bound to be full of a lot things to make Puck wonder why the hell he was even in this relationship. Thing is, he was well aware of all of that…

like that stupid police song

Dating Rachel Berry was bound to be full of a lot things made to make Puck wonder why the hell he was even in this relationship. After all, it was Rachel "I Put A Gold Star After My Name" Berry. Thing is, he was well aware of all of that from the minute he asked her out and decided not to focus on it, because a) his God basically told Puck to date her and he was trying to be a good Jew, and b) for all the crazy that came with Rachel, there were some pretty awesome perks.

Namely, Rachel. And everything she does, when she isn't rambling, and even then, it's not so bad anymore.

Not that he would ever admit that out loud, even if he was waterboared, or to his mom, but there were other things on that list that he would admit to. Maybe.

This list consisted of: her legs, her smile, her laughs, her legs, her eyes, and her legs, because damn they deserved to be counted at least three times. At least. He didn't think he was a leg man before Rachel, and he's still pretty sure he's not, he likes everything really, from legs, to hips, to boobs, to lips, but with Rachel, her legs. Just damn. He's definitely a leg man for Rachel Berry's legs.

Okay, and if we're being completely honest (which he's usually not) he became aware of most of the perks later, expect the legs (he's not blind), after Rachel had successfully burrowed her way under his skin in that completely annoying but adorable way she has.

And she is, under his skin, that is, and he doesn't mind. Much. She's still crazy determined, more determined than crazy, but sometimes the crazy, and there was a lot it, don't get him wrong, catches him by surprised.

Today it was:

Rachel laughs during their make out sessions, like, all the time. This was not kosher.

Especially since it's not exactly laughing, just soft, short, little giggles that are kinda cute, and it's normally when it gets to skin to skin action, but still. So not cool. No girl or woman he's ever been with have giggled during anything he did. He's a motherfucking stud! But it would figure that Rachel would be completely different to just about everybody else in his life.

Look, it's not that he really minds all that much, but if she giggles this much while he just skimming her ribcage, then he was pretty fucking sure that she was going to fall into hysterics when he does more than skim. And that is so. Not. Cool.

"Are you seriously laughing right now, Rach?" Puck frowns, lifting himself on his arms, because seriously, is she kidding?

She bites her lips, but a giggle or two escape her mouth, "Sorry, I'm just ticklish."

He groans. "Are you kidding me?"

"Why would I be kidding about being ticklish? It's not my fault I have highly sensitized skin. Many people do, it's not a crime. In fact, tickling is see as a bonding experience between two people in many physiological circles," she pouts, looking about ten time sexier than normal, but that could just be because her shirt is unbuttoned and her lips are all puffy from the last hour or so of making out. Yeah, he was the man.

He's about to snap back when he goes over what she just said and smirks. Rachel must see the change in his eyes because she suddenly slides backwards on the her couch, licking her lips, nervously.

It's so hot.

"Noah?" she questions, all curious and timid, but her eyes flick to his smirk. Busted! She so wants him.

"Just how highly sensitized is it?" he moves his hand to her torso and slide his hand from the curve of waist to just under her bra. He's still only getting over bra action, which kinda sucks, but he figures that's better than no action at all. Fucking compromises, but apparently they happened in, and Moses he hates saying it, relationships.

Rachel's breath stutters, and he can see just how far down her blush reaches. "V-v-very."

Whatever, it's not like the trade off sucks.

He tries not to smile, "Some warning would have been nice, I would have been more careful." Reaching down to settle her thigh more comfortably around his, his fingers just brushing the hem of her illegally short skirt, "A lot more careful."

"You're incorrigible, Noah," she says, affectionately, running her hands through his mohawk, because they both know she likes how unapologetic he is about himself.

He grins and ducks down to run his lips across her collarbone, biting her skin lightly. "Thanks, babe."

She gasps, laughing a little, and suddenly Puck's sure he's never hear a sound hotter than that. "And I'm sure you would have never used it to your advantage," she rolls her eyes, sliding her hips closer to his, pushing her skirt up on her thighs.

"Look who's talking, Rach," he bites back a groan, because that was fucking unfair, trying to regain any control.

She's giving him such a bullshit look of innocence, like a dirty thought has never passed through her mind. A fact he knows is a lie because she presses up against him in the same way again, and—fuck it. Cupping her face, he covers her smile with his mouth. He can still feel the few giggles that escape from her lips to his as she pulls him closer. He rolls his eyes, because whatever, he can deal with the giggles, in the right circumstances they're pretty fucking hot anyway.

Not that he will ever tell her. Like she needs more ammo against him. She already knows about how hard the skirts, and her stupid cherry scented body lotion on her skin make him. Uses the knowledge freely, the evil girl. He smiles inwardly, because yeah, maybe he likes its that she's a little evil. Something else he'll never tell her.

He slides his hand down her back, but this time as she's trying to stifle her giggles, he takes her earlobe between his teeth. Worrying it gently, he whispers dirty things in her ear (hey, he never said he didn't have low down on her kinks too), and like that her giggles turn into a moan that has her arching against him.

Her skirt is practically at her waist. He can feel the skin of her thighs as they slide over his hips, pushing his shirt up. She gasps when he tilts her lower body closer to his and he sucks a hickey a little too close to the lace covering her breast.

It's a good thing that Rachel is too busy loosing herself in the moment because she would totally smack him for the satisfied smirk that is growing on his face.

He is so the man.

Then her nails drag up his sides, fingers wiggling, and he has to bite his lip to keep the traitorous sound from escaping them. But Rachel, like he said, is evil and does it again. This time placing those lips of hers just under his ear and licking. He can't hold it in. It's a mix of a groan and chuckle and he drops his forehead to her curve of her neck as she giggles. Her body is shaking under him and he roll his eyes, because fuck it, she's crazy and wonderful.

Tightening the arm around her, he rolls them on the couch so she laying on him and tells her so.

"You're insane, you know that?" Okay, so he keeps the wonderful part out.

She smiles down at him, her hair falling around them and kisses him. "I was under the assumption you liked all my crazy, as you like to put it."

He gathers up her hair, pushing it away from her face — god, he might need to add it to the list he's never going to show her because loves how it feels in his hands — and pulls her down for another kiss, "Never said I didn't."

Giggling, she opens her mouth and lets him deepen the kiss and he knows all the crazy is totally worth it, because Rachel "I Put A Gold Star After My Name" Berry was smiling and kissing him like he's just told her she just won a Tony and Puck's gotta admit, it's a pretty awesome place to be.