As one does, I'm always coming up with little ideas that aren't quite big enough for a full length story. Rather than try to work them in to longer stories, I'm giving them their own home.

In this, I figured that at some point, Winry would get tired of Ed's wanderlust. Maybe I just really enjoy messing with Ed. Mercilessly.

Trouble In Paradise I

When Scar came home from his office in the Ishvalan Civic Center, the first thing he noticed was the conspicuous absence of K'shushi, their shepherd mix (shepherd mixed with loyalty, unbounded affection, stupidity, and a lot of saliva). He was usually the first one at the door, bounding with excitement that never seemed to grow stale. The children, as well, were not immediately to be seen, although that was not altogether surprising. They were getting older and they had friends and they had other interests, not to mention homework.

There was also a pile of luggage in the front room. Scar frowned a little. He hadn't been made aware that anyone were coming, let alone coming for an extended stay, if the amount of luggage was any indication.

He did finally hear some barking and young voices coming from outside, somewhere behind the house. He also heard some quiet adult voices coming from the kitchen, so that's where he headed. Looking in through the kitchen door, he found Rada sitting at the big wooden table, trimming some green beans. Across from her sat Winry Elric, holding her youngest child, Geordie, asleep in her arms. The little boy would have just turned one year old. Just the day before, if memory served.

Rada looked up from her task and smiled at him. Rada had many different smiles and Scar was familiar with them all. This one combined ah, you're home, it's good to see you with an underlying warning of somebody's having a domestic drama. She knew he didn't care much for those. They didn't have any between each other, thank Ishvala for His mercies. Other people tended to have them in abundance and liked to bring them over to share. Rada was good at listening and soothing and imparting wisdom. Scar tended to want to knock heads together and tell people to grow up.

"We have visitors!" Rada announced brightly.

"So I see." Scar went over to kiss Rada on the cheek and then went to the other side of the table to kiss the top of Winry's head. He held a particular affection for Winry, tied together as they were by a complex and turbulent past.

However, a certain other individual seemed to be missing, and wondering if he was going to regret asking this, Scar asked, "Where is Edward? Is he outside with the children?"

Rada glanced at Winry and then back at her beans. Winry looked up at Scar with a weary, unhappy expression. "He's not here," she said morosely. "He might be somewhere between South City and Resembool, but I can't be a hundred percent sure of that."

"Just tell him what you told me, sweetie," Rada prompted gently.

With an increasingly sinking feeling, Scar looked back and forth from her to Rada. He decided he'd better sit down for this. "What happened?"

Winry rubbed her forehead and breathed out a long sigh. "All right. Here it is. Two weeks ago, Ed left to give a lecture at West City University. He said he'd only be gone a few days. After a few days, he called and said he'd been invited to discuss his book at some alchemical society in Wellesley. Okay, fine. That was another few days. Then his publisher wanted to meet with him about his next book. Then some archeology society wanted him to come and talk about Xerxes. Then it was something else. Then it was something else."

Winry reached across the table and took a green bean from Rada's bowl, taking a bite out of it. "He gets so excited about all these things that pop up. He's afraid he'll miss something amazing if he doesn't follow this lead or grab that opportunity. It's like he's chasing something that always seems to be just out of his reach." She gestured in the air with her half-eaten green been. "But when it comes to his family, it's like he's taking us for granted! And since we lost Granny, I'm by myself now!" she added, the loss still fresh and painful.

Scar nodded. Pinako had passed peacefully with all her loved ones around her, which was as ideal a way to go as any. That didn't mean she wasn't missed. It was really no surprise, then, that Winry would feel more isolated and be less tolerant of Edward's absences. In a way, Edward's passion was much like that of Scar's older brother. Mattas had an almost unquenchable thirst for knowledge. If he'd had Edward's resources and freedom of movement, he would have travelled the world and they probably would never have seen him, either.

"He promised he'd be home in time for Geordie's birthday," Winry went on. "He swore up and down that he'd be home in plenty of time. But…" She tossed her head. "Sure enough, the day he was supposed to be home, the phone rings! He was in South City, of all damn places, meeting up with some old fart alchemist who was leaving the country the next day who had some sort of ancient tome that Ed absolutely had to see and this was his only chance, and he'd make it up to us and he'd bring Geordie a really nice present and blah, blah, blah!"

Winry leaned her head back and closed her eyes. "Maybe I shouldn't have done this. Maybe I should've waited until he got home and had it out then. But I just got so angry! I didn't even leave a note or tell anyone where we'd be! I just told my neighbor that we'd be gone for a couple of weeks and could they please feed our animals and keep an eye on the house. So when Ed gets home, he's gonna come home to an empty house and he's just gonna have to figure out where we went! So here we are!"

Scar was silent for a few moments. He and Edward got along better than they had in the past, even though that particular bar had started out fairly high. The days when they actively sought each other out with conflict and mayhem in mind were well behind them both. And although Scar felt a tiny grain of smugness that Winry should choose to seek refuge here, this was a kind of trouble that he was not sure he wanted to court.

"Winry—"

She straightened up quickly and held up a peremptory finger. "Please! I don't want to hear a lecture!" She turned to Rada. "Again, I'm so sorry for putting you out, but I really need to do this, and…well…" She looked back at Scar. She didn't have to say it, but her eyes clearly held the message of you owe me.

That was not something Scar was even going to attempt to argue with. "I told you the first time you came out here that this was your home if you ever needed it to be."

"Of course it is!" Rada agreed firmly. "You take whatever time you need."

Winry managed a little smile. "Thank you."

"Would you get the old army cots down, Andakar?" Rada asked. "The usual arrangement. More or less," she added.

Scar nodded. Based on the last few times the Elrics had visited, the children would double up with each other so Winry and Edward could have their own room. This time, of course, Winry would have the room to herself. Scar stood up to go upstairs, thinking, not for the first time, that they were finally going to have to get that second bathroom built.

There was no more discussion of Winry's woes the rest of that evening. Rada made sure of that. She kept the children busy and occupied, assigning little chores to Urey and Nina Elric and praising their industry. They seemed a little bit subdued, being old enough to know that something wasn't quite right but not old enough to really understand all the implications. Rada had taken her older children aside and made them promise not to let any speculation among them and the younger ones get too out of hand. This was an adult matter and the adults would take care of it and it wasn't something they needed to worry about.

Once dinner and the washing up was out of the way, and after everyone had finished taking turns with the single bathroom, the children went to bed. Winry was exhausted from all the upheaval and retired early, leaving Scar and Rada to themselves. They went outside and sat on the back porch.

"This is a disaster in the making and no mistake," Scar growled softly. The night was pleasantly cool and windows were open, so he kept his voice down.

"Oh, now, we don't know that," Rada countered soothingly.

"Oh, yes we do. And I think we can figure on it getting worse before it gets better."

Rada laughed softly. "Well, then, maybe it needs to. Maybe Edward and Winry need to face this because it sounds like they've been ignoring it until now."

Scar let out a quiet groan. "Why do they have to do it here? I don't want to be in the middle of this."

"You won't be in the middle of it unless you put yourself there. Like I said, this is something they need to face, and they need to figure it out on their own or they won't learn anything." Rada patted him on the thigh. "But we should stay close by."

Scar sighed quietly and they sat in silence for a while. With Rada sitting close and her head resting on his shoulder, Scar counted himself undeserving of such good fortune. This was something he would do anything to protect. "I wonder how long it's going to take Edward to figure it out."

Rada shrugged. "Not long, I should think. He's smart. He'll figure it out."

Ed spent an hour searching his house, their five dogs trotting after him from room to room. Winry was just playing a prank on him, he was sure. Any minute now she and the kids would pop out from a closet or something for a surprise welcome home. Yes, the closets were half empty and several of their suitcases were gone, but that was probably just for effect. After an hour and a half, Ed finally had to admit to himself that there were no more places that they could be hiding.

He finally jogged half a mile down the road to their closest neighbors.

Mrs. Arliss gazed sympathetically at the young man. "I'm sorry, Ed. All Winry said was that they were going to be gone for at least a couple of weeks and would we please feed all your critters." While Ed stood trying to absorb this information, Mrs. Arliss asked, "Do you still need us to feed them?"

"Uh…no…I don't think so. But I'll let you know. Thanks, Mrs. Arliss!"

"Not a problem, dear."

Ed trudged back to his house, becoming more and more mystified and irritated. On top of everything else, he could feel a little kink starting up in his automail leg. Of all times for Winry to hare off somewhere! He rubbed a little knot of pain that was forming in the middle of his forehead and he found himself missing Pinako more than he already had. She would have had all the answers. Better yet, if she was still with them, none of this would have even happened.

When he got home, he went to the old crank telephone on the wall and stared at it for a few minutes. He needed to talk to someone; he just wasn't sure who. As a start, he picked up the receiver and cranked the magneto.

The operator came on. Ed recognized the voice of the lady who worked in the Resembool post office as well as the local telephone switchboard. "Number please?"

"Hi, Muriel. I need a Dublith number. Hammersmith-5602."

"Sure thing, Ed. You okay, dearie?"

Ed frowned. "Yeah. Why?" he asked grumpily in reply.

The voice on the other end cleared its throat. "Just wondering. Just a sec and I'll get you connected."

"Thanks." Nosy old bat. It then occurred to him that the nosy old bat, being a nosy old bat, might know something about where Winry had gone off to. Ed cursed under his breath at not having been a little nicer and taken advantage of one of the biggest gossips in town.

After some clicks Ed could hear the ringing of a telephone. It rang about six times before it was picked up. A deep voice answered. "Curtis' Meats. What's your cut?"

Ed had to snicker. "What's your cut?"

Sig chuckled. "Just something I'm tryin' out. Nice to hear from you, Ed."

"Yeah, you too. Uh…this may seem like a strange question, but Winry didn't happen to drop in on you guys for a visit, did she?"

There was a beat of silence, then Sig, sounding a little bewildered, replied, "No, she hasn't. Why?"

Ed already felt stupid about having to ask. He said quickly, "Oh, just wondering. Well, bye, Sig! Say hi to Teacher for me!"

"Sure. Bye, Ed."

Ed hung up the receiver. Then, with a start of surprise at having not thought of it before, he snatched the receiver again and turned the crank.

"Number, please."

"Hi, Muriel! I need another South region number. Clement-8374."

"Just a moment, please." Muriel sounded a little smug for some reason. "I'm connecting you now."

After several rings, a man's voice answered. "Garfiel's!"

"Hey, Gar! It's Ed!"

"Edward!" the automail mechanic cried cheerfully. "To what do I owe this pleasant surprise? How are you? How are all your little ones? And above all, how is darling Winry? I miss her so much!"

"Oh…well…" That pretty much shot that down, but Ed pressed on. "Actually, I was kind of wondering if you knew how Winry was, or actually, where she was. I came home from South City today and she and the kids were gone."

"Gone? Like, not out visiting neighbors or in town, shopping, or off on a picnic or something?" Garfiel drew in a gasp. "Did you check the hospital? Did you check the morgue?

Ed rolled his eyes. "I think somebody would've said something by now. This isn't a big town."

There was a pause. Then the voice wasn't so cheerful anymore. "Edward, are there things missing out your closets? Clothes? Suitcases? That sort of thing?"

"Well, yeah, that's why I figured she and the kids went somewhere. I thought they might be visiting somebody. You, for instance."

"As lovely as that would be, no." Garfiel's tone was flat. "And she didn't tell you where she was going."

"Um…no."

There was a long belabored sigh. "You know something, Ed? You're smart as a coat of fresh paint about a lot of things, but about others, you're dimmer than a two-watt lightbulb."

Ed scowled. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Garfield let out a groan. "Do the math!" And he hung up.

"Fine! I will! And I happen to be great at math, just so you know!" Ed shouted at the mute telephone. He stood still for a few moments. Then he decided to make one more call, one that he didn't really want to make, but maybe he'd get lucky. He sighed as he turned the crank again.

"Number, please?"

"Hi, Muriel. Let me have Beachwood-6356."

"Are you planning a party or something, Ed?"

"Beachwood-4578," Ed repeated, his teeth beginning to clench. "Please. Thank you."

"Just a sec."

The phone on the other end rang a few times. "Please, please, please!" Ed whispered to himself.

A masculine voice answered. "Hello?"

Ed mouthed a curse. Well, there was no turning back now. He sure as hell wasn't going to talk to Muriel again today. "Hey, Mustang, you bastard!"

"That's Brigadier General Mustang You Bastard to you, pipsqueak," was the dry reply. "What's up? And why are you calling me at home?"

"Well…" Ed really was hoping Riza would answer the phone. He could talk to her much more easily. "I…uh…kind of have a problem."

"I see. And what is the nature of this problem?"

Mustang was clearly not taking this seriously. "I came home from my trip today and the house was empty. Winry and the kids are gone and so are some suitcases. There's no note anywhere. I didn't get any messages, and nobody knows where she went."

"Are you serious?" There was a hint of a chuckle in Mustang's voice.

"You think I'd bother calling you with a prank like that?" Ed snapped back. "Yes, I'm serious! I'm very serious and I'm confused and now I'm starting to get worried!"

"Okay, okay, cool down, Fullmetal," Mustang replied, his tone now concerned. "Are you sure you just didn't miss a phone call or a message?"

"All I know is that she took the kids somewhere and asked our neighbors to feed the animals—"

"How many have you got now?"

"How many what?"

"Animals."

"Uh, five dogs, three cats, a couple of goldfish, some chickens—that's not the issue here, Mustang! All Mrs. Arliss said was that Winry didn't say where she was going."

"All right, now we're making progress. You know for a fact that Winry and the kids have, in fact, gone somewhere."

"Right."

"You just don't know where."

"Right."

"And where, exactly, were you all this time?"

"I was just on my way back from South City," Ed replied impatiently. "I was at West City University before that, and then the Wellesley Alchemical Society, and—"

"That's okay. Suffice to say, you were on the road again."

"Well, yeah. It's kind of my job these days. I kept Winry informed about where I'd be and when. Notice how I told her where I'd be and when!"

"Uh-huh. Now tell me this. Did you by any chance miss an important occasion at home while you were out gracing the rest of Amestris with your scintillating presence?"

Ed grimaced a little and mumbled. "Kind of."

"What was that?"

"Yes! Okay? Yes!" Ed spoke loudly into the mouth piece. "I didn't get back in time for Geordie's birthday! I only missed it by a day! They could've waited one day! He's one! He's not gonna remember!"

"That's not really the point. A first birthday is a big deal, you know. And just because you've gone through them with your other two kids, that doesn't mean you're off the hook." Mustang gave a little sigh. "Christina's first birthday was a blast. Remember that? Oh!" he added pointedly. "That's right! You weren't there! You were off on one of your trips! See all the great stuff you miss out on?"

Ed rolled his eyes. Christina Mustang's birthday parties were just a little too over the top for his taste anyway. He could do without the clowns and the ponies and the jugglers and the unicorns and whatever the hell else Mustang lavished on his kid.

"Whatever. If Winry was that upset about it, don't you think she'd say something?"

"Hasn't she? I mean, be honest with yourself, Ed. She's never said anything at all?"

"Uh…" Be honest with yourself. There was that time, a couple of trips ago. Ed clenched his jaw. Why couldn't Riza have answered the phone! "Maybe."

"So do you really need to have this spelled out to you?"

Ed breathed out a long sigh. "No, I guess not."

"Okay, now that we have that established, you just need to figure out where she went," Mustang went on. "Just for the sake of total disclosure, she's not here."

Ed threw his arms up in the air. "Then where the heck could she be? I've check everywhere!"

Mustang chuckled. "Have you really?"

Ed stared blankly at the phone for a moment. Then he was visited by a cold moment of realization. "Oh. Oh, she wouldn't!"

"Betcha. I'll betcha that 520 cenz you keep borrowing from me."

Ed hung up. It was one thing to have to put up with Mustang's condescending smugness. He was damned if he was going to take it from someone even more insufferably holier-than-thou. And to think Winry was going to make him come crawling across the desert sand! No sirree. If that's the game she wanted to play, he could play it, too. They'd just have to wait and see who blinked first.