Well, all. The first session Camp NaNoWriMo is upon us. Are you in or are you out?
Happy April first to everyone, by the way. In the spirit of the April Fool, I wrote this oneshot.
For anyone who doesn't know: I was originally supposed to troll the latest chapter of Do Not Cross but the bad grammar wasn't agreeing with my brain. XD
By the way, while I don't normally write anything following canon, this turned out to follow PP in my mind. So… yeah. Canon-ness.
I stayed up late helping DB-KT last night… this morning. My fault, partially. I was working on my plotwall for DNC. It went from a duology to a trilogy. *sigh* It's going to be good. ;)
Disclaimer: I do not have any legal right over Danny Phantom.
The April Fool
By iOc
Danny woke with a start. No, his ghost sense hadn't gone off. His alarm, however had. What time was it? Nine in the morning?
He grabbed the electronic device and gaped. He was going to be late!
He dug around his drawers to find he had no fresh jeans. Darn. He found a pair that smelled fairly clean and a shirt… He managed to find one that wasn't that wrinkled.
Looking around, he spotted his half completed homework. Grumbling, he stuffed it into his bag and headed downstairs. A quick breakfast was in order before he took off for school. He was already a couple of hours late, what was a few minutes?
He opened the fridge and looked around, rattling everything noisily.
"Danny?" his mother asked. He turned to look at her. She was still in her pajamas and she was rubbing sleep from her eyes. 'What are you doing? It's 5.30 in the morning."
He looked outside. It was still fairly dark. He had pushed it off as being cloudy that day…
"My alarm clock said it was after nine…" he said, blinking.
"April Fools!" Jazz said, popping out from underneath the kitchen table.
.x:X:x.
Danny's head slammed into his desk. He was so tired. On top of fighting ghosts, which kept him up late at night, Jazz's prank woke him up after an hour of sleep. Didn't ghosts realize that he had a life outside of hunting them?
His parents, Sam, and Valerie had trained a group of people to help him but it still wasn't the same as him doing the actual hunt and capture. They could only do so much.
"You okay?" Dash whispered from his seat next to the half-ghost.
"Huh?" Danny said, looking at him. He was still getting used to the whole Dash-is-nice thing.
"Are you okay?"
"Tired."
"I'm sure the teacher wouldn't mind if you slept in this class."
Danny shook his head.
"I don't want any special treatment." he said.
Dash shrugged and he didn't bother Danny for the rest of the period. When the bell rang, he walked with the shorter teen to his locker.
"You know, everyone here has got your back, right?" Dash said. "If you fall behind in any of your classes, people will help you catch up."
"Who, like you?" Danny said, exchanging his books and spiral notebooks for the next class's materials. "No thanks, Dash. I'm pretty sure you're somewhere in the middle of the class rankings."
"So are you." Dash sighed. "I didn't mean I'd help you, but Mikey and Lester could. They're good at taking notes."
"So is Sam. She color codes everything."
"Really?"
"Yeah, she's kind anal about organization." Danny said. He shook his head. He started to move down the hall again.
"Look, Dash, I've got to go. Class starts in a few minutes."
"Hey, Danny, one thing."
Danny sighed and turned back. Dash grabbed him by the front of his shirt and shoved him into his locker.
"April Fools!" Dash said, laughing as he walked away.
.x:X:x.
"How's your day been, Danny?" Sam asked as she sat down next to him at lunch. When she saw the look on his face, she winced. "That bad?"
"Yeah." he replied. "Why is everyone picking on me?"
"It's April first."
"Yeah, I know that. But I don't pull pranks on anyone else. Today. I save it for the rest of April. Why should April first be the only day you pull pranks?"
"Your logic is masterful." she said, rolling her eyes. "So, I was wondering… did you want to come over later? Tuck said he can get off mayoral business and the three of us can hang out like old times."
He perked at that but them slouched.
"I really should get some sleep." he said.
"You always slept when we hung out."
"Only after I took up ghost hunting."
"You slept before that. You were always so lazy."
Danny smiled. She had a very good memory, of course. She always would have one. He couldn't count how many times he relied on her for her help in remembering something important, like his mother's birthday.
"So, do you want to hang out with us later?" she asked. "We could study for the math test on Thursday."
"Sure. I don't have much else going on."
"Cool, salad?"
He huffed playfully and took the bowl of greens. He noted that she poured the right amount of ranch dressing on it.
"So, what's up with you?" he asked.
"What do you mean?" she replied.
"You've been kind of… out of it the past couple of days."
"Finish eating first. I'll tell you then."
He shrugged and ate the salad. When he had polished off the bowl, he looked at her expectantly. She shifted slightly under his gaze, playing around with the last surviving leaves with her fork.
"Not going to eat that?" he asked.
"Hm, no. Here." She handed him her bowl and watched as he ate the rest.
"So?" he asked, setting aside the now empty bowl.
"Right."
He met her eyes, his eyebrows raised in expectation. She leaned over and mumbled something into his ear.
"What?" he asked.
She leaned over again and whispered.
"I'm pregnant."
He gaped at her for the rest of the lunch hour.
.x:X:x.
The rest of the school day Danny had not been able to focus. He stared blankly at his teachers as they lectured. They thankfully didn't answer any questions. Even their little pranks didn't get a peep out of him He tried to think of how Sam could get pregnant.
There was only that one time… and they hadn't really done anything inappropriate… But they had been drunk.
His head hit the desk with a loud thump. A few students looked at him, as did the teacher, but nobody questioned him. True, they didn't know how stressful ghost hunting could be but they could at least sympathize.
When school was dismissed for the day, Danny rushed over to the nearest drug store. He browsed through the aisles of candy and chips, past the greeting cards, and down to the aisle with feminine products, baby things, lubricants (he noted), and pregnancy tests. He thought it was funny that all of those items where categorized together — along with candy bars in a usually empty space.
Shuddering, he grabbed some of the candy and a little blue box. He quickly paid for the items, receiving a curious look from the cashier. Danny mumbled his thanks and went back to school where Sam was waiting.
"Where did you go?" she asked. "I thought you left me. Was it a ghost?"
"Um, had to go pick up some stuff." he said holding up the bag.
"What's in it?"
She peeked inside and cocked an eyebrow.
"You do know I already used one of those, right?"
"Well… sometimes the tests lie and this is kind of important, you know?"
"Fine," she said, rolling her eyes. "Ready to go?"
He scooped her up and flew them to the Manson household. It didn't take them long to get there, what with Danny's anxiousness and all. Tucker was waiting inside, talking to Jeremy and Pamela Manson. He dismissed himself when he saw them come in.
"What's up?" he asked.
"Not much, Sam has to do something before we do anything else." Danny said, pushing Sam upstairs.
"Hey, you know you don't have to shove." she grumbled, pushing back to cause some resistance.
"You are heavy, just so you know."
"I am not and you know it."
"Just walk."
"What are we doing?" Tucker asked, confused. He didn't get to see his friends very much and he spent the rest of their sophomore year, along with all of their junior and a large chunk of their senior year so far, in his office. He honestly had little knowledge of what was going on in their lives beyond what he saw in the news and tabloids.
He received no answer from either teen, however.
Once they were in Sam's room, Danny locked the door and pushed Sam in the direction of the bathroom. He gave her the bag.
"Take it." he said. "Now."
"Is there any reason for the candy bars?" she asked.
"Huh? Oh, no. Those were in the aisle…"
She raised her eyebrows and closed the door.
"What's going on?" Tucker asked.
"Sam might be pregnant."
"Since when are you two that intimate?"
"Not now, Tuck."
"Geeze, I missed a lot."
"Yeah, you did."
They waited for Sam to come out. She didn't take very long, but the test did. They had to wait three minutes for their answer. Tucker and Sam chatted calmly, while Danny paced the floor. He'd glance at the timer every five seconds or so.
When it finally went off, Danny rushed to the test. He compared the results to the instructions on the box. Positive. He sunk to his knees. His life was over.
Tucker looked at Sam and raised an eyebrow. He quickly typed a message to her on his phone.
From: Mayor Tuckmeister
Are you really pregnant?
…
From: Sam the Beast
Nope.
…
From: Mayor Tuckmeister
Then how did you get it to say that the test is positive?
…
From: Sam the Beast
Easy, Jazz.
…
From: Mayor Tuckmeister
How'd she get it to say positive?
…
From: Sam the Beast
Easy, she's the one who's pregnant.
…
From: Mayor Tuckmeister
…
…
From: Mayor Tuckmeister
How long are you going to make this joke last, exactly?
…
From: Sam the Beast
As long as I can.
…
From: Mayor Tuckmeister
Well, you might have to invest in some prosthetic stomachs. Danny might not catch on as quickly as you hope.
…
From: Sam the Beast
If I have to tell him, I'll kill him.
…
From: Sam the Beast
By the way, missing a PDA?
Yeah…
Well, my April Fools day gift to all of you.
Enjoy the rest of your day.
So I had to repost this because the stupid editor kept adding in spaces at random parts.