Decepticon Prisoner Guide: How to survive and escape edition
Disclaimer: (searching name on credits) Nope, it's not there. I'm not rich, nor a connection to TF world. I'm a student-loan, unemployed, community college student.
Rule #1 – Don't scream like a femme. Even if you're boy, there is a very high chance that your voice will go back pre-puberty while the body remains the same. The Decepticons feed off fear. Also, it will be an excuse to test out their swatting strength on of a happy place or start hoping that the Autobots will spring into action!
Rule #2 – Don't go to sleep! I know this is a "no duh" rule, but you will probably not like where you will be at. If in the med lab, your chances just went down from 80% to .8%. You're not going to like what those evil scientists are going to do to you. In this case, throw Rule #1 out the window! If you're in another 'Con's room, it really depends on who the person – mech- is.(See Rule #4.)
Rule #3 – Crazy 'Cons= no chance for sanity after rescue. For example, Blitzwing. The 'Con has three personalities for Primus' sake! One is sort of the mediator; the other two are a drone with a mouthpiece and a youngling who got some unstable Energon! That 'Con will haunt your sleep with his strange personality shifts. You will never interact with a human without thinking that human would say, " I WILL CRUSH YOU!" or " Oh, I want to poke you until you squish!".
Rule # 4 – Start a monologue with Screamer. In every group, there are loyalists, sidewinders, and "Screamers". Starscream loves to monologue about being in charge if Megatron would die. This slagger will start rambling on until he goes into stasis lock! I know you really don't wanna talk to anything in the base, but start by saying, "What would you do if you were the leader?" While he's talking, slip out of your cage -if possible- and get the Pit out of there ! Don't walk, run your little organic feet off!!!!
Part 2: Autobot Rescue
Scenario: You stumble out of the Decepticon base. For some insane reason, World War 3 has apparently started without you. See those huge Transformers slaughtering each other. Of course, you do. WHY ARE YOU RUNNING RIGHT THROUGH THAT BATTLEFIELD! Remember in movies there are those stupid human moments..YOU'RE MAKING ONE RIGHT NOW! Instead of barreling through the field, go around. It may take forever, but it's better than being a wad of gum under a Transformer's foot.
Option 1: Start celebrating with a happy dance.
Option 2: Keep running until a blue-eyed , friendly Autobot picks you up.
Best answer…Option 2. Reason: Having a happy dance with draw attention from the unwanted kind. Run to those awesome, wax coated Lamborghinis. I would suggest the golden one. I heard he has a better interior than his scratched up brother's paint job.
xXxXx " You little slagger better get back here!" Ratchet hurls a wrench at Sunstreaker's head.
"It was a joke, Hatchet!" Sunstreaker carries the written data pad under his arm as he runs away.
(Ironically, this data file consists of strange rules.)xXxXx
Sorry if this was a bit corny. This bunny plot popped into my head after seeing all these Decepticon prisoner stories. Lots of love to my Story Alert people: Fire Redhead, Anasazi Darkmoon, KillForKlondike, serindarkwolf19, Of-Light-and-Shadow, and shortlived. These authors are evil! I truly think they have the best Decepticon prisoner/genetic experimentation(that one is Redhead) stories out there. Slip on over to their profiles and read some. Trust me, you will start to love to hate Darklight, Anasazi's villian. Adios, amigos!