Durarara is not mine. If it was, you'd know. Trust me.
People held their breath. Birds stopped chirping. Certi's motorcycle slowed down to a stop with a faint whinny. Ikebukuro itself seemed to fall silent.
Heiwajima Shizuo and Orihaya Izaya. The two names that nearly every citizen in Ikebukuro knew. The names of the two people who never failed to uproot lamp posts and vending machines and street signs during their 'skirmishes'. The two people who showed their hatred for each other through loud exclamations and swear words, punches, and knives.
The two most feared 'Ikebukuronians', Heiwajima Shizuo and Orihaya Izaya.
…were kissing.
It had been an ordinary day in the busy city. Simon had been selling Russian sushi, Certi had been off on a 'delivery', and Shizuo had been walking around and smoking and beating the crap out of annoying people; when the infamous Orihaya Izaya had decided that he was bored, and had showed up in front of his least favorite human.
Needless to say, a fight had ensued, and two trash cans and five street signs had been bent and or destroyed beyond repair during the next fifteen minutes.
So far, so good.
After the fifth street sign, Izaya had chuckled and ran away in his showy way, with an enraged Shizuo on his tail.
Then the sixth street sign had been uprooted.
Izaya, as daring as ever, had jumped on to the pole of the sign as it had sped towards him. Shizuo had gnashed his teeth and drawn the pole closer to put Izayain arm's reach- a typical Shizzy response; and Izaya had let him, thinking to pinch Shizu-chan on the nose and infuriate the blonde man still further.
Izaya hadn't counted on some gangster running past and pushing Shizuo slightly, upsetting Izaya's precarious balance on the pole. Falling backwards was sure to get Izaya killed; he was about four feet up in the air, and he didn't want to get his skull cracked just yet.
Which was why Izaya had fallen forward. He had thought he would simply fall on top of Shizuo, making them both topple down on the street, and with Shizzy taking the brunt of the fall; Izaya had planned on lightly skipping away and smirking. And that was nearly what had happened.
Except that their lips got smashed together.
Hence the present situation.
It hurt. The 'kiss' had hurt very much, as faces had gotten smashed together and sharp teeh had split their lips. Izaya, hissing in pain, darted his tongue out to taste the coppery red liquid purely out of reflex, and met Shizuo's lips.
Then Izaya fully realized what had happened and froze.
Neither man moved. Izaya suddenly thought of fluffly romance novels, where such accidental kisses were normal and sparked new relationships and heaty situations.
The onlookers looked on with bated breath, thinking of murder.
Shizuo, for several bizarre moments, thought of fatty tuna.
He should move. Izaya should move. He should stand up cockily and wipe his lips off, then grin down at a surprised Shizzy and say something witty. But he couldn't. Because he was very, very surprised, and very very surprised Izaya couldn't move. Shizuo seemed to be in a similar situation because he wasn't blinking or moving at all.
And then Shizzy suddenly yanked on his collar, (his beautiful, beautiful fuzzy collar, yanked on by that monstrous strength! Izaya could nearly hear the stitches popping and almost cried) and a tongue entered Izaya's mouth and a tongue –what?
Izaya gasped- that is, if he would've gasped audibly if he had been able to; as some strange, foreign muscle – Shizu-chan's tongue, he realized-invaded his mouth and started exploring. Izaya's initial shock deepened and he stayed stock still, not knowing how to respond anymore. Then his reflexes responded for him, and he pulled away from lack of air, gasping and panting, a thin strand of saliva connecting him to Shizuo for a split second before breaking.
"Wh..what?" he asked blearily, still not quite sure what to do.
Shizuo stared at him for a moment.
Then he stood up, dusted off his bartender suit and straightened his little bowtie; grinning down at a surprised Izaya before saying something witty (Izaya forgets what), and walking off.
Izaya just gaped for a long while, before damning his reputation to hell and running away, a prominent blush dusting his cheeks (from embarrassment, of course) and whispers haunting his rapid footsteps.