White Streets and Difficult Gifts
New York, always considered the gray city due to its concrete giants inhabiting the streets, so characteristic of its skyline, was now the perfect white landscape of a Christmas postcard. 2013 brought a record-worthy winter; the temperature colder every day and the pedestrians more difficult to recognize under hats and scarves. New York never stopped; even when the cold was so piercing that it burned, New Yorkers kept walking the streets like they were immune to the different seasons.
It's something that surprised Rachel the first months she spent in the city of the skyscrapers, the tide of people that never disappeared or slowed down, whatever time of the year it was. Now Rachel was one of that endless wave of New Yorkers in movement, too busy to let the cold put a halt to their everyday life. Kurt easily got used to the extreme temperatures too, but probably because he enjoyed having such a varied wardrobe. Ohio didn't let him show off all his outfits.
Even so, they both appreciated the cozy environment of the Tommy Hilfiger store once they walked through the doors and the comforting warmth hit their cheeks, flushed from the wind. The snow on their boots melted along with the cold in their bones.
"What ideas do you have? I think this one is super cute," Rachel said, picking up a bowtie from one of the store's shelves and showing it to Kurt.
"He already has that one."
A quick glance was enough for Kurt to recognize the bowtie she had in her hands; he had knotted it too many times to forget. Rachel looked down at the bowtie again, her eyes widening in confusion. The pattern contained a bright yellow that could pass as a canary feather, but the dull fabric used softened the whole combination and created a nice contrast. It was too colorful to overlook it, but she couldn't recall seeing it before.
"Seriously, this one too? You've said the same with every single one we've seen, and it's the fifth shop we've tried!"
"You know how he is…," Kurt murmured, barely paying attention to her, too busy looking over every corner of the store. "…and I already told you, I don't want to buy him another bowtie, he has thousands and everybody buys him the same thing."
Rachel's sigh was audible even from the other side of the store, so much so that Kurt had to throw her a pointed look, only achieving another pout.
"I don't know why I came with you, I knew this would take forever."
When Kurt asked Rachel if she could accompany him to do some Christmas shopping for Blaine, Rachel's first reaction was a short but blunt 'no'. She was too busy, even during the holidays, to dedicate time to something that wasn't her Funny Girl rehearsals. The Syracuse premiere performance was so close that she started avoiding the calendar when she walked pass it in the apartment, just to save herself the unpleasant knot in her stomach that appeared every time she thought about it. The time was running, and even if Rachel wasn't one to let the nerves bother her, it was undeniable that all the pressure was getting the best of her. But Kurt always knew how to convince her. A couple of words about how important it was to take breaks for her voice and the promise of buying her a piece of cake on their way home were enough. Kurt probably knew what her answer would be even before she did.
"You could use the time to do your own shopping. Don't you have to buy anything for Christmas?"
Kurt's question left her briefly in silence, something that was once exceptional, but that had become a common occurrence after her life radically changed overnight. Her friends had stopped asking what was going on in her head during the long episodes of silence, because they only needed to look into her eyes to know.
Rachel used to think that a song was welcomed in every moment if it was the right fit, but she wasn't the same person anymore, that girl who fantasized about showing the world her talent from a stage and believed that she was the only thing that mattered. She learned that there were situations, events in life, that were too emotive to fill with anything more than silence. Remembering Finn giving her a star during their last Christmas together was one of those moments.
"I only have to get something for my dads for Hanukkah. That's it."
As always, Kurt understood the affliction in her voice even if she didn't mean to. Sometimes she couldn't help but feeling vulnerable, but she did try not to make it obvious, especially in front of him. It wasn't fair to remind Kurt of the loss of his brother, even if she herself couldn't stop thinking about it.
Kurt just took her hand in his and squeezed it lovingly. It was a simple gesture, but full of meaning, and the glow in Rachel's eyes that was threatening to intensify disappeared.
"Well, don't you have to give eight presents for Hanukkah? That's a lot of work; I wouldn't want to be in your shoes. I have so little imagination that if I had to buy eight gifts for Blaine, I would probably give him seven copies of It's a Wonderful Life and a bottle of hair gel."
That made Rachel genuinely smile. They left Tommy Hilfiger behind and were now leisurely walking through the least busy part of Fifth Avenue. The day continued as it started, with gray skies and white sidewalks, and the Christmas lights adorning the buildings flickered with a red and gold halo that transformed the streets into a magical contrast of textures and colors.
"Shut up, you're the most imaginative person I know. I'm sure you would come up with seven amazing gifts. And hair gel, of course."
Kurt's snort momentarily stained the air in front of him with the warmth of his breath. The atmosphere between them was casual and light again, and Rachel was once again thankful for how easy it was for them to move from one conversation topic to another without getting carried away with the feelings evoked in them.
Their steps came to a halt in front of Anthropology, one of their favorite stores in the city and a mandatory stop whenever they went shopping. Walking down the aisles and discussing about the fairness of the prices had become a shared pastime, and it never failed to amuse them.
"You could buy me something too, if you need an excuse to distract yourself."
"I already bought you something, silly. I bought something for everybody. I wanted it to be a surprise."
Rachel diverted her attention to a hanger full of purses, but Kurt shook his head briefly. Too juvenile, even for a nineteen-year-old girl.
"For Artie, I bought the latest generation USB flash drive that, according to the guy from the store can hold a thousand hour of video footage. But maybe he fooled me and it's only a simple USB stick shaped as a cactus. At least the cactus is cute; it has a face. A smiley face."
The store was getting more crowded by the second and the constant thrum of the strangers' conversations was getting too noisy for their liking, so they went back outside without buying anything. The night was quickly approaching and it had started snowing, but somewhere they could hear the soft melody of 'Silent Night' and that made them slow down their walk back to the subway.
"Sam was the easiest, surprisingly enough. I went to FAO Schwarz and bought him a comic book, a platinum edition. It caught my attention because the hunk on the cover wore a suit that reminded me of Lumière from the Beauty and the Beast. Broadway show, not movie, of course," Rachel continued, still recalling her adventures to find the best Christmas gifts for her friends.
"What did you get Blaine? Maybe you will inspire me."
Rachel didn't answer Kurt at first, and when she did it was with eyes down and a light blush.
"Uh, Blaine, well…," her voice slowly lowered at the same time that her lips puckered in thought, leaving to Kurt the easy task of guessing why.
"You bought him a bowtie, didn't you?"
Rachel just nodded.
"Yes… but I am not his fiancée! I don't need to make the same effort as you! I didn't know what to get him; even you've run out of ideas."
The dramatic gasp Kurt let out outraged made some heads turn around to look at them questioningly.
"I have not run out of ideas! I'm just… taking my time, to find the appropriate gift. I don't want to buy anything less than perfect."
Rachel smiled mischievously, already used to her best friend and his adorable antics, never one to admit a defeat.
"Of course… That's what I thought."
The snow was falling heavily, sprinkling the sidewalks and coloring their eyelashes with white flakes. Rachel walked with her arm laced with Kurt's, and he used the moment to observe her calmly under the city lights. She looked peaceful, finally relaxed. Kurt couldn't help but ask one more question.
"So… what did you get me?"
"If you think that I'm going to tell you, Kurt Hummel, you don't really know me at all. You'll have to wait until Christmas, like everyone else."