Jack Sparrow sat at the bar in Tortuga, having a tankard of rum. He heard footsteps behind him and turned to see Captain Blackheart Noah of the Blackheart.
"Noah! Long time no see, matey." Jack extended his hand.
"Six years, Jack. Six years ago you promised me 20 pounds of gold. Where is it, Sparrow?"
"Unforunately, due to a terrible catosphere, the gold that I once held in my possession is now safely at the bottom of the sea. Your share, however, is aboard The Black Pearl in the hands of Hector Barbossa. Which is a more dangerous situation than being at the bottom of the ocean where my gold sits. Now, you have my blessing to persuade Barbossa to hand the gold. To which, I will most likely be glad to aid you. Savvy?"
"Jack Sparrow, the Devil take you! I'll see you pay for this, somehow."
"I wish you luck with your search for punishment and gold. Excuse me."
"Not so fast. I don't need to search for punishment. I have it outside."
"Surprise me."
Jack and Noah stepped outside. The only thing that Jack saw was a young woman wondering around, as though she were confused.
"That's Sarah. Sarah Smithsonian. We've had her aboard for six months now, found the poor lass about to drown. She's brought us luck ever since. She's yours."
"How does this qualify as punishment?"
"I didn't say it was good luck, Sparrow."
Jack Sparrow came to realize the truth...
"Oh, bugger."