Title: Show me the meaning
Summary: Jessie and Katie in future. They drifted apart, why they broke up, would they may meet again...
Disclaimer: All 'once and again' characters belong to ABC. I'll own a few fictitious ones that will pop up every now and then. I am just borrowing the names of places, bands, venues/songs or any part of the story. So again, except the plotline I don't own anything.
Pairing: Jessie/Katie
Ratings: M (though I am not sure how this works exactly)
Reviews: Please … would be much appreciated
A/N: This is my first fiction ever. I write poems and this is a new territory I would like to explore. Reason for writing this fiction – I have read most of the fictions posted on the group and I absolutely love the 'love' between Jessie and Katie sketched by various authors. I will try to use similar looks of these characters as has been established over and over by all the wonderful writers. The innocence of the original character portrayed on 'Once and Again' still intrigues me whenever I watch any clip and I just wanted to see if my writing skills can do any justice to these wonderful characters.
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Chapter 1: Show me the meaning of being lonely
Jessica Elizabeth Sammler, a.k.a Jessie, 24, tall, slender, beautiful with crystal blue eyes, is an upcoming artist and a promising screenwriter. During high school, her inclination towards theater/art grew more by the day and luckily got admitted to and graduated from UCLA School of Theater, film and television. She does a bit of many things. She does theater, writes for small shows, sings for plays sometimes and also has become a regular with her Brother Eli's band 'Euphoria'.
"uh..oh" Jessie muttered under her breath and started cleaning the coffee from breakfast table which got spilled when Lily entered the kitchen and startled 'the-oh-so-lost-in-thoughts' Jessie.
Lily: "Are you okay Jessie?"
Jessie: "Yeah… I am fine; I just didn't expect anybody up so early" Of course stupid me! To expect such a thing in Sammler-Manning house!
Lily: "Oh okay. I just came down to get some water."
If only Jessie could explain the real reason for her being so jumpy! Something like this happened few years back too. Jessie was about to deepen the kiss with 'her' when Lily had entered the living room startling them both. That day had changed so many things in Jessie's life and today when she was yet again lost in her own world that for her, exists almost in parallel to this very world in which her body functions and mind is most of the time on auto-run, Lily entered the Kitchen giving Jessie the same feeling as if she was caught doing something this world didn't expect out of her.
Just when Lily was getting water from the refrigerator, the phone started ringing.
"Hello" Lily answered the phone. "Hello Eli… I am fine… yeah here… Jessie this is for you"
Jessie: "Hello"
Eli: "Hey Jess… guess what, people loved our last performance!"
Jessie: "That's great". Why am I trying so desperately to sound a bit excited? Why does nothing make me excited now? Come on Voice! Sound cheery…yes…CHEERY… and… Let's put ears to work too…listen!
Eli: "Yeah…well there is more news… we've been offered another gig… there is this huge charity event and many celebrities are expected to turn up … you know for publicity stuff and all"
Jessie: "Okay… so from your tone, I guess we are getting good money… which doesn't sound appropriate considering this is supposed to be a charity event… and where is the event taking place?" I should try a bit harder in suppressing this anxiety every time I get to hear the venue of their next performance. Moreover last time we performed in NY, my hope of finding that one familiar face in audience, my wish to sing while looking into those adoring green eyes at least once again in this lifetime, turned quite futile…well nobody knows for sure if she is still in NY…Russel mentioned seeing her in NY five years back…but he didn't actually meet her… may be he saw somebody else…damn it! I don't even know where to look for her…I just want to meet her once… may be apologize… oops tears starting to build up…stop… listen to HIM!
Eli: "Yup… I see you know your brother quite well! But seriously this is an AIDS something charity event and people with huge bank balances are donating while most of the performers are getting paid for their diligent effort… so don't try to give me any guilty pangs… besides; I would go even without the money… you know. I just don't want to loose an opportunity like this to meet some people up in the ladder. And Miss. Attention-to-nitty-gritty-details, we'll be performing in Oakland coliseum… so you should get all your hot dresses and get ready to break some hearts in San Francisco"
Jessie: "I guess San Francisco should be warned – the Sammlers are coming!!" yeah try a little humor … it wouldn't hurt your stupid brain…
Eli: "Ha-ha"
Jessie: I can hear him grinning through the phone, he may not be big on brains, but he is sweet… 'Coz he is MY brother… focus! "About this opportunity, I guess you are right …so when do we leave? I have to come back to get all my stuff for the event… I just came here for a short vacation so didn't bring much!!" …and don't be sad, she may not be in NY, may be she moved to London…hmmm…may be we could perform in London next time… how about pulling off a gig for Queen herself …now I am being crazy…again!
Eli: "We should be there next Wednesday, practice in the stadium for couple of days and then perform live in front of THOUSANDS of people on Saturday!!"
Jessie: "OKAY … I get it … this one is BIG! Anyway, I'll see you on Monday and we'll drive from there on Wednesday…right?"
Eli: "Sounds like a plan! Give my love to rest of the Sammlers and all of the Mannings.. .later gator!"
Jessie: "Sure…Bye Eli"
Jessie went back to attic and was about to lie down on her bed when something on her study desk caught her glance. It was a picture from Jake's wedding. They were looking so happy, so content, so at peace with everything around them. Jessie closed her eyes and her mind went down the same memory lane she so often visited as that lane, that city, that world was all named after one person and truly belonged to – KATIE
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They were sitting in the garden, after that hectic photo session where this picture was taken at Jake's wedding, just enjoying each other's company.
"Jess…do you believe in marriage? You know 'forever' thing"
The question caught her off guard …she stared into those amazing green eyes and knew that this question was asked with a lot of sincerity so she answered sincerely "No…the term marriage is not the best word in my dictionary since my parent's divorce…but I want to believe in 'forever'. I don't know if the concept of being somebody's soul mate holds true in real life but I want to believe in my 'soul' which is happy as its in love… with 'you' and it wants to be with your 'soul' till eternity"
"I … umm… that was…" she couldn't muster any coherent words so she leaned in to grab Jessie's hand and planted a soft kiss on the palm. "You know I love you… I'll always love you"
"You know how badly I want to kiss you now and declare my ever-growing love to you" She sighed " … ugghh… I wish we were someplace alone…. may be we shouldn't talk cheesy stuff when we are in public, it's hard to control this sudden urge to … ravage you!" she shyly looked away hearing her own choice of words
"Wow what a turn around…from cheesy forever-love-soul stuff to ravage-you…Ms.Sammler this is the first time I see an animal instinct in you!"
"Well as a very intelligent sophisticated human being, I don't want to forget the legacy given by our great-great-ancestors… especially when I see a clear streak of resemblance right here in front of me"
After few seconds, "OhMyGod… did you just call me an Ape?" she mocked a frown.
"I may have….what would you do about it?" she matched the playfulness
"Well you would get the answer when I drop you at your mother's place tonight… but for now, another VERY intelligent human being is calling us" she said pointing towards Grace who was making gestures at them to come inside the hall.
After the reception, Katie drove Jessie to Karen's place. She went inside and Karen was watching TV in the living room. On hearing the sound of door opening and closing, Karen looked up and smiled
"Hello Dear …Hello Katie …How was the wedding?"
"Hello Mrs. Sammler"
"It was fun..." she said sitting next to her mom which of course Katie didn't like
"I am glad you had fun…" then she turned to Katie "Would you like to join us?" she said noticing that Katie was still standing
"Thank you Mrs. Sammler… but I should go and finish my homework" she looked at Jessie who had assumed a sad expression on hearing that Katie is leaving, before continuing "Oh Jess… Could you give me that paper back you borrowed for your English assignment? I need it for reference for another Dimitri paper" she rolled her eyes to emphasize her teacher's name while Karen looked at her…Obviously amused!
"ummm…uhh.." she stuttered thinking hard to remember which paper Katie was talking about … then she looked at the twinkle in Katie's eyes and it hit her "oh that one… sure" she said walking towards her room
"Goodnight Mrs. Sammler" she said following Jessie to her room
"Goodnight dear" said Karen turning her attention back to the show on TV
Jessie's room
Jessie was about to say something when Katie followed her in her room but before she could utter a word, she noticed Katie's body coming ONTO her. She expected a hug or a kiss but THIS was scaring her. Katie was moving like a zombie and her body was pushing Jessie's body towards bed without using her arms or hands. Jessie could move sideways but couldn't do as she was holding Katie's gaze and it has been always hard for Jessie to tear away from that gaze. Jessie's legs hit the bedside and she slumped on bed and Katie pinned her down. Jessie was trying hard to make sense of all this. Her thought process in progress "Katie has straddled me and in a split second, she started beating on her chest like a ….. like a….monkey… uhhh….like a… chimpanzee…may be like an ape……AAAAAAAPPPPPEEEEE!" Jessie was about to break into fits of laughter but she was stopped with a very passionate kiss. They were getting carried away in the kiss when Katie reluctantly pushed herself away and smiled
"Just FYI, if you would call me a monkey, I would do monkey stuff and …. Much more" Katie added playfully. Amused by the whole scene, lovingly smiled at her girlfriend "you are amazing and I love everything about you… even this 'animal' stuff" she said before leaning up to kiss those very beautiful-but-now-swollen lips. She started trailing kisses on the jaw-line moving towards neck when she felt Katie pushing herself away
"I should go or we will be writing a paper on how-to-get-busted-while-making-out" she said quickly placing a peck on Jessie's lips and assuring Jessie with just her eyes that she wants this as much as her but is just being responsible.
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Jessie opened her eyes and picked up her ringing cell phone
Jessie: "Hello"
"Hey there… may I add sleeping beauty… you sound like one?"
Katherine Singer, a.k.a Katie, 25, tall, trim, beautiful with emerald green eyes and a charmer. She graduated with BFA from NYU Steinhardt Department of Art and started working on documentaries which helped her travel to different places around the world. She loves photography and many of the pictures she takes, make it to big exhibitions. Most of the people know her by her alias names. She uses an alias to submit her work from the fear of being found out. Very few people know her real name or her.
Katie was going through some of her latest pictures on her laptop while waiting for Donny in a café. She stopped at one particular image – sun was dying out and blue waters of the ocean were clearer than ever. She captured this one last week when she was in Brazil. She smiled within herself thinking how this picture represents her life; everything in her mind seems to die out in sometime except something 'blue'. She could never forget a certain pair of blue eyes even if she forced herself to. She tried running away from everything her whole being was connected to, but she couldn't run away from herself and the feelings for 'her' that she tried fighting all these years. She is not depressed, she is not sad; she has learned to co-exist with these feelings. She fights the memories but she loves to think about them. There is always a constant war in her head. At least this war keeps her company or she would realize how lonely she is despite the entire façade world trying to be around her. She was just staring in space when somebody shook her.
Katie: "Oh ...hi Donny! Sorry I was just thinking about something"
Donny: "Something or SOMEONE?"
Katie: "Busted huh? Well now that you've caught me red-handed, I should tell you – I was thinking about YOU!"… Donny is a nice guy… good looking…smart…I wonder why he couldn't find someone special till now…and look at his smile…or laugh…he is funny too… sometimes…well he tries hard…I shouldn't make fun of him in my head, he is one of the very few true friends I have…
Donny: to the waiter who had somehow made his presence known - yes I would like a latte and one of those she is having, that's all, thanks!"
Turning back to Katie- "Very funny! You do know that I have a higher fee in making appearance in thoughts and even higher if somebody dreams of me… and…"
Katie: "SURE…. That's why you are so rich!" … see he is trying again…
Donny: "Whatever! Anyway let's just get to the point. And just a tip that here in LA, people don't waste time in such silly chit-chats"
Katie: "Absolutely! I agree… people are VERY busy here. After all, coming up with ideas to constantly be in limelight is a huge task"
Donny: "Would you please stop being so sarcastic? Anyway we are all set for that exhibition for AIDS charity event this Saturday. Prints have already been shipped and we'll be flying to San Francisco day after tomorrow."
Katie: "Yes Sir!" …why does he have to be MY agent … he could get better clients easily …make more money… he has been with me for over 4 years now… and it's been almost 8 years since………
Donny: "Good! Now, tonight, you have to meet somebody… so dress up nicely…or shall I say 'sexily'…I'll pick you up around 7"
Katie: "Who? Are you setting me up? I should be helping you in love department rather than you setting me up on a blind date? You know I get much more action than you do…."
Donny: "Would you stop ranting? Just be ready around 7 and remember – this is an important appointment!!"
And before listening to Katie's reply, he got up and left.
"Whom does Donny want me to meet?"