Kiss me Slowly

"Are you really planning on jumping down?"

I waited before answering, "Yes."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes." I repeated. She frowned and I quietly mesmerized her hazel eyes glimmering in a hypnotizing way, like, when you attempt to avert your gaze but you can't. She observed me for a second and the frown stayed put. She cautiously took a step forward and I smiled.

"Really…?" She whispered. I nodded and slowly looked down the 50 story building. I sighed and contemplated on falling down, feeling the rush of adrenaline and all fade to black in an instant. All my troubles, all my disappointments, all those painful memories of what I have lost will be gone if I just lean a little bit forward. It wouldn't hurt anyone, except, maybe this beautiful stranger with captivating eyes.

"Why would you want to do that?"

I stayed silent and my gaze drifted towards the woman who was now a few feet away from me. I carefully took all of her in. Her pencil skirt, her blazer buttoned all the way, her hair held in a high pony tail, and no makeup. Yet, she looked magnificent.

"Don't you have someone to see later today?" She asked and I felt at ease as she didn't avoid my gaze. It's nice when someone looks at you in the eyes once in a while and not spit at you in disgust because you won't share your late parents' fortune with your family.

"No." I stated. She bit her rosy lip, "What about a girlfriend? Surely, you have one." No, actually she cheated, stole at least a couple millions from me and left the country. I loved her. I did, but she stabbed in the back me and left me all alone. She's all I had after my parent's death and she left.

"Um, what about your family?" I smiled warmly at her and her lips parted slightly. She's trying to make conversation. She took another step forward and I shifted my eyes towards the sky. Grey and lonely.

"There must be someone out there waiting for you." She said a little bit louder.

"No. There isn't." She took another step forward.

"Where are they?"

"Gone." And I want to be gone like them. I'm all alone, having been for three years now and it's getting boring. No one wants a broken, cold, distant and forlorn guy around. "I'm all alone."

"And do you think this is the only way out of your loneliness?"

"It'll stop the pain." I locked eyes with her and she diminished the distance between us. Only a couple steps away stood amid us. "And anyways, it's not like anyone will care. I'll just be forgotten."

"It's that what you want? To vanish completely and not leave a trace of whom you were?"

I stood still. "I'm not proud of who I am." Here I was, talking to a complete stranger. But she's beautiful, and kind. Kind enough to talk to the suicidal man, seconds from committing. "What does it matter?"

"It does matter." She stated. I soughed and shrugged. "Didn't you hear? I have no one."

"Maybe." She said. "But you know, you should open your eyes a little bit more and it's okay, it's okay to sometimes look back to what you had once but don't dwell too much on it. Not all of it is gone." I clenched my teeth, but ended up shrugging. "Maybe you didn't have someone in the past. But I care. And don't say you have no one because I'm here now, aren't I?" I nonchalantly turned around to the woman holding her hand in front of her for me to take a hold of. I scrutinized it and I looked back at the buzzing streets underneath me. "Do you need a friend? Then I'll be a friend. Do you need someone to shed some burdens off? Then I'll be that someone. Do you need a shoulder to lean on? I'll be that shoulder. Do you need someone to scream at the world for you? Then I'll scream at it how many times you want. I'll be anything you need to survive whatever you're going through. I will. So please. Please, don't jump." I watched her. And when I didn't reply, she sighed. When I didn't take her hand, she dropped it back to her side. "Then I guess it can't be helped."

My eyes widened as she took off her heels and was soon standing next to me, on the concrete rim of the building. "Do you need someone to jump with you so you could feel less alone when leaving this cold world?" She smiled. "Then I'll be that someone." I shook my head. "What are you doing?"

"What does it look like I'm doing?" She retorted and I stared at her incredulous. "I'm jumping with you of course." She inhaled. "So on the count of three?" I felt her smaller hand grasp mine. She clutched it tightly and laughed neurotically. "Who's gonna count?"

"You're crazy." I stated, but soon I was holding her tiny hand on mine. She gulped and chuckled. She'll go this far? "One-" She began breathless. "-two—" I watched with interest as she took intakes of breath and I held a exult. And quickly, before she even got to three I took a step backwards. My feet landed on the concrete where she once stood and I pulled her down with me. She quickly wrapped her arms around my neck and held tight. I felt her body shiver beneath me. I slowly rested my hands on her small waist and gently rub them, trying to calm her shaking body.

"You're treating me to coffee." I heard her say and I smiled. I didn't give a word of protest because I was actually interested to know about this woman who was willing to risk her life for mine. She's insane, of that I'm sure. But she's different, because obviously no one is stupid enough to give their own life for a complete stranger.

She's different, and I like that.

Present

My hand ran through my hair anxiously as I watched her furiously grab her suitcase and began throwing all her belongings in it. I watched hopelessly as she indignantly zipped the suitcase and opened the next one. A cab was waiting for her downstairs. Three suitcases were already packed and all I could do was watch her pack.

"Lo-" She walked past me and I desperately tried to grab her hand but she pushed me away. My body was quavering. "Loren, please don't do this." I choked. Her face was distressed and she was holding back the tears. I was worse. My brain was pulsating, my body warm and my breathing hitched.

"Please. Loren, don't leave." She grabbed her books and dumped them too, ignoring my pleads. I gravely tried to speak to her, to hold her and make her listen to me. But she would push all my attempts away. And I was getting enraged.

"Loren-Babe Don't go." She pressed her lips together and a tear betrayed her. I walked up to her and I wanted to ask her why. Why she was doing this? What happened? What wrong? She stood still and a shaky cry escaped. "Loren, what did I do?" She held back a whimper and my fist clenched and unclenched. She shook her head and bit her lip. I clutched my hair harshly trying to calm down my anger and frustration. I couldn't get mad. No, I can't hurt her.

I continued watching as she kept searching anything that was hers. But this is our apartment. Everything here is ours, but I'll give it all to her if that'll make her stay with me.

WHY? WHY? WHY? Why is she leaving?

I don't know. I never do.

"Invite me to coffee again." I stare impishly at the brunette beauty staring down at me. She smiled innocently and I smirked. I quickly sat up from my bed. I saw her face turn crimson as her eyes unconsciously trailed down. I chuckled and put on a shirt. "I took you yesterday."

"Yeah, but I like our talks, and we usually have the best ones during coffee." I sighed and stood up. She followed me downstairs to my kitchen. Loren saw where I was headed and quickly got in front of me, she blocked my way. I raised an eyebrow at her and she pouted. "Pleaseeeee."

"I've taken you to coffee for the last month, every single day. Haven't you gotten tired?"

"No!" She stomped her feet and I narrowed my eyes at her. Yes, she's the one who saved Eddie Duran from jumping down a building to land on his death. "So take me!" She whined and I stared at the living brat staring me down. "No." I retorted and she scowled. "Well, why not?"

"I have coffee here and you're annoying." I stated and pushed her aside. I entered the kitchen and Loren's quick feet trailed behind. "But you buy such a terrible coffee blend."

"It'll do."

"I hate you!"

"Good to know." She frowned and sat on of the high chairs next to the counter. I walked over to her, pressed my hand on the metal on both of her sides and leaned down. She kept her stature and I smirked as I watched her cheeks turn a pinkish color. Her breathing faltered and I pressed my lips against her cheek, feeling the warmth she provided. "Eddie-"

"I'll take a shower and then we're going to Aroma." I looked at her hazel eyes gleam with excitement and I a small smile appeared. I pulled away and I flinched as she squealed. "Thank you!" And I was suddenly pulled into an embrace. Her arms were draped around my neck, and I felt my heart began to increase its speed. Something warm burst within me and I found myself reciprocating her embrace, pulling her tighter to me.

"Thank you." I whispered and gently kissed her head.

Because even though she can be annoying and impertinent, she still saved me and now, she's possibly the best thing that could've saved me from that fall.

Present

"Stop, babe, please."

I begged. Tears silently spilling down her cheeks. I swallowed whatever was holding me back from stopping her completely. In instant, I grabbed her suitcase and threw it to the side. She breathed in rapidly and I stepped closer. She stepped backwards and that triggered some sort of affliction on me.

"Why are you doing this to me?" I asked her, keeping my gaze solely fixated on her. And she, she was adamant to not look at me. "Why Loren? Why?" I asked, each time the wavering in my voice becoming distinct. She pressed her lips together. "Tell me dammit!" I don't mean to raise my voice, but anger and soon despair were consuming me. And she knows too. She knows me too well; these past months with me are not in vain.

"You know Eddie-" She began and I held my breath. "I've tried so hard." My gaze dropped down and she inhaled. "I have. And I don't know what else to do with you. I really don't. And sometimes I feel so useless when you're breaking down in front of me and I want to help you, but you don't let me." Her eyes watery, her voice raspy. "You push me away when I want to help you. It hurts, Eddie. It hurts so damn much." She shook her head quickly, her gaze never disdained from me. "I don't know what to do anymore. I can't be here when all you're going to do is push me away. I can't do that anymore. I'm sorry, I'm sorry for failing you. But I can't take it-" She sobbed silently. "I can't. I really can't. It hurts, it hurts Eddie. I want to help you get better. I want to destroy all those thoughts you have and create new, better ones. But I can't do that because it's useless when you push all my attempts away."

She sniffled and my body was rigid. "So that's why I'm leaving. I'll still be here for you, but until you realize that you do need help, I can't be here." Loren slowly wiped away her tears. She grabbed the suitcase and treaded down the stairs of our house. I turned around, vision blurry, brain throbbing and I watched her back walk away from me. Creating distance from us.

"Those are my parents." She stated as I was looking through her album. I nodded. "Where are they?"

"My dad is married to this model and my mom is in traveling all over Europe." She leaned her head on my shoulder and I closed the book. "Why aren't you with them?"

"I don't want to. I don't really have a good relationship with them. Anyways, I prefer to be with you."

"Don't you want to travel the world?" She sighed and I watched as she gently laid her head on my lap. We were sitting in her couch on the living room. She smiled peacefully. "I've already traveled the world enough."

"I'm boring, Loren. All you do with me is drink coffee on the mornings, spend most of your time in my apartment and whenever I'm in a bad mood you sulk in the corner pissed at me."

"Hey it's not so bad."

"But you get bored." I ran my hand through her wavy brunette hair. She hummed. "Maybe we should change that." My hand stopped suddenly and I looked at her. She was smiling serenely and her hand was soon resting on my cheek. My eyes gently trailed down to her lips and I found myself leaning in.

"Kiss me." She whispered. I smiled and complied. Our lips brushed against each other. I looked at her for any sign of hesitation. When I found none, I pressed my lips on her awaiting ones. And soon, I was exerting whatever I had within me to this kiss.

Anxious hands, tongues rubbing harshly against the other, pleading moans, bodies moving in rhythm. I felt it.

I love her.

Present

When I kissed her, I didn't know why I had done it. Spurred of the moment maybe, but I did. Do I regret it? Of course not. When our innocent kiss was no longer that, innocent, it was ardent and full of lust, I didn't regret it. Because at that moment I was sure that I wanted her. Even if at that time my feelings were blurred. But I felt something special for the stranger who saved me. And as time progressed I got to know her. She let me into her life. But I never did tell her about mine.

She never asked, and I guess, she was waiting for me to open up to her on my own free will. That was a crazy inference for her to act upon on because I'm not the sort to come at you all of the sudden and tell you my life story. I'm not really, I really can't just open up to you unless you get me to. But tell you about myself on my own free will? No, that'll never happen because I hate my past. It's full of betrayal, loss, anger, and pain. And no one wants to hear about that. Right? I really never wanted Loren to find out what I had to go through because it'd be too much for her. She'd realize how messed up I am and decide that I can't be fixed. Then she'll leave upon this realization. And that would've killed me entirely.

Because I love her too much. It scares me even to think how much she means to me and how attached I have become of her existence.

But my silence about my past has gotten her to leave. She is tired of trying to help me in my times of need, but all I do is push her away. I do it with a purpose though; I don't want her to see me when I'm hopeless. I hate it when she cries whenever I'm having one of my anger attacks. And sometimes it's really hard trying to control myself with her. My anger management goes over to the roof, but I am able to keep it cool enough to not hurt her. Because if I ever lay a hand on her with the intent of hurting, then that'll destroy me. And I don't know what'll do.

I was just being careful with her. I didn't want her to suffer with me. I didn't want her to carry my burdens because that'll be too much for her. I was just protecting her from an isolated life like mine. But all I did was pushing her away and made her feel like shit. I didn't mean for that. No, I didn't.

I just wanted to protect her from myself.

I kept staring at the door, listening intently to Loren making her way down the stairs. My fists unclenched and my body relaxed. A smile soon found way and I shook my head.

Yes, she was crazy for ever putting her life in danger for a stranger. She was crazy for ever trying to help the stranger heal. She is insane. She really is.

But I'd damn be well crazy if I ever let her go.

This is a short two-shot. I had gotten a request months go with this song, 'Kiss me Slowly' by Parachute, by an anon and I never got to it. But here it is! Tada. Anyways, this doesn't really make sense. It was 12 a.m. and this idea came up and I guess I said, "Why not?" or "F*** this." While writing this early today in the morning, I knocked out at 2 a.m, and here I am! I finished the first part. If you understand the point of this story, then kudos for you! Because I really don't. And guess what, I prefer writing 1st person point of views. I like it better. OMG guys, I got so many great reviews yesterday for my latest mini-story. That, I will update later :). Thank you so much!

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