Disclaimer: This is a true story. everything that happened to Rei happened to me. It's a hurtful thing when you feel like your friends don't trust you. I hope I managed to capture that feeling. Sailormoon does not belong to me it belongs to. ::takes deep breath:: Naoko Takeuchi(creator), Kodansha(publisher?), Toei(animated series), DIC(NA mutilator)[actually, I thank them, even if they are rather strict w/ the dubbing changes]Mixxzine(NA Manga publisher) And most recently Tokyo pop and Cloverwick entertainment. :: exhales:: Yep, I think that's it. None of the characters are mine, and
suing me is useless. I'm a jobless senior in high school. That means that on any given day I have between $.46 to $1.50. If you think that's worth the lawyers fee, sue away. I'll write a story about you! Hahahaha!!!! Ahem, um anyways, on to the story.
Smoke
I stared dumb founded as my princess and best friend finished her truth.
" You're not offended, are you Rei-chan?" She asked in a worried voice. I shook my head numbly. I wasn't offended. To be offended, you have to know that a comment is coming. This knife in my heart was completely unexpected. How could my best friend ever think such a thing?
The other senshi, even the outers, who weren't around for the 'sleep-over scandal' could feel the tension and as I took a leave to the bathroom, I could hear Haruka brusquely take up stride.
" Okay then, Ami-chan, truth, fucking truth, or funny truth?"
*
It was August when Usagi-chan let her true feelings come out. That means she's been bottling them up since November.
I never thought twice about what happened except as the occasional way to tease Usagi when she became just unbearable. My grandfather was out of town and our not so helpful assistant was with him. As luck would have it, Mamoru's floor of his apartment had flooded that weekend, and trying to be helpful towards a friend, I agreed to take him in.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
" Hello Mamoru-kun!" I chirped excitedly, opening the door to let him in. He was as good looking as ever, tall and exactly what I wanted in a man, almost. The man of my dreams wouldn't be dating my best friend.
" Hey Rei-chan." He greeted casually, coming in. For a moment I stood there and watched him drop his stuff before I straightened up. This was silly, the girls were coming any minute to hang out with us and I was staring like a moron.
" Make yourself at home, I'm going to go get some stuff ready for when everyone else arrives." Nodding absently, his mind in that mysterious elsewhere it seems to permanently be, he turned towards his bag while I headed happily for the kitchen, happy to have the man I still secretly loved almost as my own, even for a second.
*
I suppose a good deal of the problem was the sake. I don't suppose what tempted me to serve it, or worse yet, play a drinking game with Mamoru and Makoto, but for some reason, I did both and when it came time for everyone to leave, Mako-chan, Mamoru, and I were all well on our way to being buzzed. I don't know if that added to the unbearable tenseness of the suddenly empty, but so stiflingly intimate room, or ( Kami I hope not) detracted from what could have been as we listened to soft music in the dark,
talking about all sorts of inane and stupidly trite things that I suppose he thought were deep. I only know that I was very glad when the time to go to bed came.
Here is where my friends begin to blame me. I gave Mamoru my bed and I curled up in the floor. It's been asked repeatedly and pointed out that I could have taken my grandfather's room, so why didn't I? I suppose that's a great point, in retrospect, but at the time, I never thought to give up my bedroom, even for my crush. Turning my music on softly, I turned off the lights, stretching out on the floor and soon settling into a deep sleep via the rhythm of Mamoru's breathing.
It was almost dawn when I awoke from my nightmare. It was one of the truly bad ones that left me a silently shaking wreck, cold through and through. It felt that even the power of Mars couldn't keep me safe, so I resorted to the most basic reaction. I reached up and gently shook Mamoru's leg.
" Mamo-kun?" I whispered. He awoke quickly, but only partially.
" Un?" I felt my face grow hot at the childishness of the question I was about to ask.
"Ano..." I began. " May I sleep with you?" Actually, it was more
mayIsleepwithyou?, but he quickly caught on to the idea. For a moment he was silent.
" Gomen.." I began.
" Hai." I smiled and grabbed my pillow, clambering to the foot of my bed. " What are you doing?" I looked at where he had slid over and pulled back several blanket beside his own body.
" I was going to sleep down here.." I began. he laughed.
" Do you really want to sleep with my feet Rei-chan?" He asked, wiggling his sock covered feet. I frowned.
" Iie!" I exclaimed, climbing up to where he lay, slipping in the bed beside him, letting his warmth drive away the inner demons in my head. After a moment I laughed, picturing Odango-attama if she could see us now.
" What's so funny?" He asked. I could almost hear his eyebrow raise. I told him about the look I could picture as he laughed with me.
" Let's trick Usagi tomorrow?" I asked. " We could tell her we slept together tonight, which is true, and let her take it whatever way she means. It could be bigger than the shower scandal!"
In case you didn't know, the shower scandal happened when Umino called Usagi one day after several attempts with only a busy signal as his reply. Usagi had been taking a shower and talking to Mamoru via the speaker phone, but what she ended up saying to Umino was that she had been to busy talking to Mamoru in the shower.
Does everyone see where I'm going with this?
That's right. everyone's favourite nerd thought they were showering together. Call us mean, but we still haven't corrected him. The looks he shoots Mamoru-knu are just too funny.
The point is, the stage for my biggest mistake was set as we fell asleep, me facing the door, Mamoru facing the wall.
*
I had thought the joke went spectacularly well. I got just the right amount of anger and indignancy from Usagi before she realised I was laughing, and even though the rest of the senshi were a bit aloof for a few days, I never put two and two together.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
That is, not until tonight. Mamoru had received a call from Mako-chan who had out drunk me and as a prize was too drunk to go to school the next day. In a bit of melodrama I never would have suspected of him, he changed the story a bit, making me into a love starved youma sent straight from Beryl and portraying himself as the ever faithful prince, making sure to litter his tale with plenty of ' I could only love Usagi'. Of course I never knew about that call. I never knew anyone's true feelings about that night at
all until The moon princess summed it all up nicely with our back and forth truths. Her voice still echoes in my head.
' Rei-chan, if Mamoru had turned to you right then and asked to make love to you, would you have said yes?'
' Odango! Do you even have to ask?' I had laughed. I didn't realise the look I saw on her face for a split second was sadness. She thought I'd say yes. ' of course not! I'd have kicked him outside, stuffless and shoeless!' There was silence. " Usagi, what did you think I was going to say?'
' Honestly, no offence, but I thought you'd say "Hai".'
It's about now that I look up and realise I've been silently crying. There is a knock at the door and Michiru calls for me softly from the other side.
" Daijoobu Rei-chan? Doshita?" I almost laugh. No, I am not okay. my best friend thinks I'm a slut with no self-control. She doesn't trust me.
" I'm fine." I lie, removing some eye drops from Ami's medicine cupboard and dripping the red from my eyes. " But those burritos will go right through you!" I joke. She laughs and moves away from the door gracefully.
Taking a deep breath, I go back out to join the game. I can feel bad later.