A/N: Wow, this took way too long to actually submit! I've had the intentions of putting this up for so long, and I'm finally doing it now! Woot! I guess now I'll have to see how many people actually like this!

Note: This is based on the movie; I haven't actually read the book, so don't get mad at me for getting some details wrong! Enjoy!

Update as of June 15, 2009: I'm currently replacing the chapters of this story in order to fix my rather horrible grammatical errors. I certainly learned to write much better since this was written, haha!

Chapter 1: True Love Makes You Want To Puke

Waverly sighed in boredom and rested her chin on her hands, her elbows standing solidly on the windowsill of the family room. Her dull blue eyes stared languidly at the waving fields of grass behind the expanse of yet another temporary home.

Usually moving to a new place excited her, but by now she was just sick of it. Her parents had insisted on remaining safe and hidden here in the wilderness of Guilder, away from the prying, vengeful eyes of Prince Humperdinck. And even though they had mostly avoided him, there had been some close calls; the most recent one resulting their moving to another isolated spot…yet again.

Wind brushed stray locks of Waverly's rich blond hair against her cheek. She closed her eyes and breathed peacefully, enjoying the momentary silence. Suddenly, the quiet was interrupted by hysteric giggles from behind her. She rolled her eyes in annoyance.

Another thing she was sick to death of was her parents' endless kissing. Day in and day out: it seemed that their faces were glued together! It made her want to puke! And even more so since they didn't seem to mind doing it right in her presence.

Of course, she couldn't really blame them. True love doesn't happen everyday, she thought dismally, echoing one of her father's favorite quotes. And true love was one of the things they kept going on and on and on about! It was driving her insane! Twelve years she had lived, and it seemed that in all that time, her parents had spent more time with each other than with her. Sure she was jealous, she could admit that. But that still didn't mean she enjoyed listening to her parents suck the lives out of each other!

Huffing, Waverly pulled together her cloak and strode out the front door, not bothering to glance back to see if they noticed or not. Out on the grassy embankment, the wind tore at her hair and dress. She barely noticed it as her legs picked up speed and she was flying to the summit of the hill. Catching her breath on the top, she smiled in awe. What a view! The sea crashed on the cliff hundreds of feet below her and the salt in the breeze smelled wonderful! Her smile faded as her storm-blue eyes connected with a ship slowly approaching on the undulating waves. Her mind was frantic.

Oh no! We just got here! I don't want to leave again!

But then she noticed the flag whipping around the mast. Her smile reappeared in a broader version. It was the flag of a pirate ship, and not just any pirate ship! It was the Revenge, the ship of the Dread Pirate Roberts!

Waverly's heart did a little flip-flop in her chest. Her father had told stories of his escapades as the Pirate Roberts and then the anointment of the current Roberts, a Spaniard by the name of Inigo Montoya. How she had dreamed of meeting him! Although her parents kept regular contact with him through the mail, there was always a problem of actually getting together. 'We're moving, we live too far away, we're too busy' were constant replies to his eager summons. But now, it seemed that she would finally meet the man in the stories!

Her hopes were instantly dashed as thoughts of her parents came to mind. They would never allow her to meet him. It's too dangerous, anything could happen, she imagined them saying. We don't want to lose you like we lost each other. It was the same excuse as always. And as much as Waverly wanted to see Inigo Montoya in person, that wasn't the only reason. She almost wanted something bad to happen so that she could witness the bravery her father had boasted about in his tales of heroism back in the day. All the adventures he had described seemed like pure fantasy; he did little more than practice with his sword now.

Although he had taught her amazing skills with his blade, she wanted to see him really in action against the bad guys. Picturing feats wasn't the same as actually seeing them. How desperately she wanted her own adventure, anything to break free from this dreary life! Sighing to herself, she realized how impossible that would be. Her parents would kill her if she tried anything. With her tail between her legs, she trudged back to the house, moping. She stepped through the front door and made for her room when she was halted in place by a clucking noise. With a grimace on her face, she slowly turned and faced her parents.

They were sitting in each other's arms on the chair of the family room, watching her. Her father had his characteristic sarcastic smile on his lips, and her mother looked stern. Oh boy, she was in for it now.

"What were doing out there all alone?" her mother demanded, her face scrunching up to make it look more menacing. Waverly liked to call it the parenting face. Her mother's eyes grew and her face turned pointy as she stood and gawked down at her daughter. "Waverly, you know we don't like you going out alone!" she scolded.

Waverly scoffed. "Oh, you noticed," she muttered under her breath. Her father's eyebrows skyrocketed as he seemed to hear what she just said. He rose and stood next to his wife, cradling her hand in his own.

"What's the matter?" he asked, smiling slightly. Waverly glared at her toes. She could say so many things…

"Well?" her mother insisted. Waverly sighed and raised her head to meet her parents' eyes.

"You two had your adventure, and you keep telling me how brave and courageous you were. But how come we keep running and hiding like cowards? Why won't you let me have any fun? We keep moving and to places where there is no one I can spend time with. You wonder why I go out alone? Well it's because that is all I can do! There is no one else here, and you two are always together! How can I not go alone?" Waverly cried passionately.

Her mother's beautiful face paled considerably and her father looked thoughtful, as if he were considering her argument. He shook his head, splaying his blond hair into even more of a mess than before.

"Buttercup, my love, I think she has a point."

Buttercup eye's glistened with tears as she turned to her husband sharply.

"How can you even say that?" she demanded, her voice filled with emotion. "I lost you twice, Westley! I would not be able to survive if I lost Waverly!"

"But I taught Waverly skills with the sword. What was the point of teaching them to her if she wasn't going to even use them?"

"You said they were for protection! So she could protect herself against Humperdinck's men!"

"Yes, but even then we didn't let her fight!"

"It was too dangerous!" Buttercup protested, but she could see the point had not taken on her husband's face. Waverly watched in triumph as her mother bit her lip and spun on her heel, slamming the door on her way out.

"Thanks, Dad," she said softly. Her father put his arms around her shoulders and squeezed.

"No problem, kiddo. Maybe there's a Ms. Dread Pirate Roberts in the future!"

Waverly smiled and hugged him. When they parted, Waverly looked up into his face.

"But I know there's a present Dread Pirate Roberts, and he's here now!" she exclaimed.

A/N: Review please! If enough people like this story, I'll keep updating! Just wondering what the reactions will be…oh, and it's marked for humor for a reason. It'll get better, that is funnier, don't worry! And just to reiterate the point, review!! Thank you, come again!