My friend asked me to write a very weird fanfiction imagine thingy. It includes a real person, britishness (as requested by Roxey), ice cream and a consulting detective on a pogo stick. OH AND VERBAL ABUSE TOWARDS ANDERSON, and hyperness.
I DON'T NORMALLY WRITE LIKE THIS BUT ROXEY AND I ARE WEIRD AND IT'S DIFFICULT TO WRITE ABOUT A PAL BECAUSE YOU FEEL WEIRD LIKE YOU'RE WRITING A FICTIONAL EULOGY OF SOMETHING.
No flames please, it's random and ooc and I'm sorry but it's what Roxey said that she wanted so yeah :)
I don't own Sherlock.
I had just moved to London for some reason, I wasn't even sure why and then there I was, getting onto the plane, off the plane and I was in London. I was a confused chicka.
To be honest, I hadn't thought that London would be as big as it actually was, and I didn't really realise that what I had done was kind of stupid.
I was hovering around an ice cream shop because ice cream attracts me like a moth to a lamp, apparently. I had no money and I just wanted a vanilla chocolate chip one but I couldn't and I felt kind of upset.
Correction- I felt very completely utterly upset.
I wasn't focusing on the real world very much, I had kind of drifted off, when someone's voice ripped through my thoughts of chickens wearing eye patches.
"Excuse me, are you in the que?" he asked, I looked up and saw a man who looked like he enjoyed cuddling kittens with unicorn horns and I smiled at him and answered.
"Noiftjhgm."
He raised an eyebrow at me, I blushed.
"Er, I meant no. No I am not in the que FOR I GOOD SIR HAVE NO MONEY WHATSOEVER AND I CANNOT BUY AN ICE CREAM."
So guess who got an ice cream from the kitten unicorn guy.
Yup, that's right. ME. Ha.
We went back to his house so that I could eat my ice cream without british people being everywhere making me die. Emotionally that is.
Unfortunately, there were just as many british people at his flat, and most of them made me die, others made me not die as much. Like some man-thing or something called Anderson for example. Ugh.
We walked up the stairs and I hears some kind of bouncing springy sound, and John, as I learned his name was, looked equally as confused as I felt.
"It's an experiment John!" a man said. He had cheekbones. Lovely yummy cheekbones. He was also bouncing on a pogo stick and I laughed a bit.
"Wow." I said.
"Who's this? Is this your girlfriend John?" a really annoying looking one asked.
John looked uncomfortable.
"I'M ANYBODY'S GIRLFRIEND YAY." I shouted, everyone stopped what they were doing and stared at me. I coughed awkwardly. "Sorry..." I said quietly. "I'm Roxey."
John introduced me to everyone and I tried to be polite to everyone that I could be polite to, but apparently I was rude to Anderson and his Silly Sally girlfriend weirdo not girlfriend thing.
Yeah, she was a thing.
A THING!
So everyone ended up eating ice cream and I got a bit more comfortable with british people. Then Sherlock Holmes decided to hop over to me on the pogo stick.
"I can't deduce you," he admitted. His voice was like velvet, yeah, his voice was good.
"Seduce? Because, like, yeah, yeah you can." I laughed a bit.
"No, deduce."
"Oooohhh... well why's that?"
"Because you are fabulous."
"Okay, well at least you can still seduce me."
Then someone who didn't sound british jumped over to us and shouted 'NOOOOOOOOO'.
I looked up at him and raised an eyebrow.
"Excuuuuuuuse me, Sherlock Holmes is seducing me here."
"Well maybe I want to seduce you too." he said, he was irish.
"Who the heck are you anyway?"
"Jim Moriarty."
"Nice."
"Yeah."
"HEY JAWN WE ARE ALL SEDUCING ROXEY!" Sherlock shouted, John came running over and smiled.
"Okay."
"Hey, guys, can I join in?-"
"Go away Anderson, nobody likes you." Sherlock said. Anderson sighed a bit.
They all kissed me, but not Anderson because he is mean.
The end.
YEAH ROXEY IS A MARY DUE BECAUSE THAT BISH REALLY IS A MARY SUE (love you)